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I am here just to vent...

I have little acne, it doesnt bother me much, and my secret is to take care of your face. Now, Im a really insecure person and it seems that the last two weeks have just gone in a spiral and completely confused.

So, lets go back to September. Me and my friends went out, I belong to a youth group, but since we're already friends anyways, its more like going out since we'd be doing that anyways...so we invited the guys for an even,t hella fun event, and I have many guy friends and its cool and new guy I met, Alex...damn hot, hella cool blue eyes, blond hair, perfect skin..wow is what I thought at first, not to mention hella god body biggrin.gif. Buut, we started tlaking, and it was the wierdest conversation ever, there was strangely somthing strange going on and to me it seemed he maybe liked me...but it didnt make sense, Im nowhere to match him, yea I have cool aqua eyes, white as peach, but brown hair, and not so much confident or perfect body. But he's 17, I'm 15 and as wierd as the night was, I thought he'd be a cool friend nothing will happen cause he wouldnt want to, but he'd be an awesome friend...the next day somehow me, my friend, and him hang out again, and it was definetly we were friends, and it was funny how wrong the conversation was about the sex figures on his keychain...so its cool didnt forget about him but like we wont bump into each other again..

Dead wrong. Went to a convention (Like a 4 day camp) with all my friends, and he was there. HE said hi, I unconciously hugged him and said hi, didnt realize who he was reckognized the face..looked at the nametag to remmeber who he was... well from there, it all went wierd. He found that violating my waist and butt is a great way to get me pissed at him, and he knew I secretly liked it and that I liked him...pissed, tried to ignore him, but got impossible, he'd come tlak to me, poke me some more...*sigh* I felt like shit he still came up to me and confused like crap if he likes me, I dont get why. Toward the end, he stopped doing it, and hugged me discovered that I loove guys' hugs..hah.

To make matters worse, Im like best friends with his friend, and Im pretty sure he tells him something from our convos :/. He got my aim sn afterwards, and so we talk..

Girls said he was hot, and I know he is, so why when there are girls hanging on him, he goes to me anyways, some of them were certainly better looking,a nd the last day when I felt like shit and broke out a bit on my forehead and didnt pput the lil makeup I do didnt faze him either..

We have some similarities, and now when we talk on aim, we both refuse to acknowledge or to even sort out whats going to happen, his friends say I should've hooked up with him, and Iwouldnt mine except I dont make the first move, if he wants to, he should make the first move and Im not backing down from this rule. And the sad thing is, he graduates this year, and we'll see each other again, we'll both be going to the community college next year, he'll make sure we bump into each other again..*sigh* Now in three weeks, we see each other again, and its a dance, and I dont know what the hell will happen, but the thing thats going in my head why the crap me and why he wont leave me alone, and why he has to be such a nice person and is not a jerk at all, it would be easier to resist and go away if he was just a bit jerky..but nooo he's a cool person to be around with, and we acted such like children, it was such a refreshment...I never act like a child anymore, lol.

In the end, Im confused why he'd like me, and if his friends are correct they are saying he likes you, and to make me more pissed he knows that deep down I do like him and in one convo discussing coldness he said something that still give me chills...I'm warm and we both know what I mean.. ahh I was ready to kill him when he said that, at the same time, when I talked to his friend about another guy first thing he asked me if I like him which I dont anymore, but yes.

To make this situation all funnier, Im usually the paractical one, saying dump her, go out with her, and as one of my friends said, welcome to being a teenager Im sure you'd love your own paractical advise to get through this..lol

This would all be easier to deal with if I just wasnt insecure with myself, but I am, and that causes lots of confusion in itself

whew, this board is good for venting, hah. Now I realize how much I appreciate being single, lol cool.gif

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I am here just to vent...

I have little acne, it doesnt bother me much, and my secret is to take care of your face. Now, Im a really insecure person and it seems that the last two weeks have just gone in a spiral  and completely confused.

So, lets go back to September. Me and my friends went out, I belong to a youth group, but since we're already friends anyways, its more like going out since we'd be doing that anyways...so we invited the guys for an even,t hella fun event, and I have  many guy friends and its cool and new guy I met, Alex...damn hot, hella cool blue eyes, blond hair, perfect skin..wow is what I thought at first, not to mention hella god body biggrin.gif.  Buut, we started tlaking, and it was the wierdest conversation ever, there was strangely somthing strange going on and to me it seemed he maybe liked me...but it didnt make sense, Im nowhere to match him,  yea I have cool aqua eyes, white as peach, but brown hair, and not so much confident or perfect body. But he's 17, I'm 15 and as wierd as the night was, I thought  he'd be a cool friend nothing will happen cause he wouldnt want to, but he'd be an awesome friend...the next day somehow me, my friend, and him hang out again, and it was definetly we were friends, and it was funny how wrong the conversation was about the sex figures on his keychain...so its cool didnt forget about him but like we wont bump into each other again..

Dead wrong. Went to a convention (Like a 4 day camp) with all my friends, and he was there. HE said hi, I unconciously hugged him and said hi, didnt realize who he was reckognized the face..looked at the nametag to remmeber who he was... well from there, it all went wierd. He found that violating my waist and butt is a great way to get me pissed at him, and he knew I secretly liked it and that I liked him...pissed, tried to ignore him, but got impossible, he'd come tlak to me, poke me some more...*sigh* I felt like shit he still came up to me and confused like crap if he likes me, I dont get why.  Toward the end, he stopped doing it, and hugged me discovered that I loove guys' hugs..hah.

To make matters worse, Im like best friends with his friend, and Im pretty sure he  tells him something from our convos :/. He got my aim sn afterwards, and so we talk..

Girls said he was hot, and I know he is, so why when there are girls hanging on him, he goes to me anyways, some of them were certainly better looking,a nd the last day when I felt like shit and broke out a bit on my forehead and didnt pput the lil makeup I do didnt faze him either..

We have some similarities, and now when we talk on aim, we both refuse to acknowledge or to even sort out whats going to happen, his friends say I should've hooked up with him, and Iwouldnt mine except I dont make the first move, if he wants to, he should make the first move and Im not backing down from this rule.  And the sad thing is, he graduates this year, and we'll see each other again, we'll both be going to the community college next year, he'll make sure we bump into each other again..*sigh* Now in three weeks, we see each other again, and its a dance, and I dont know what the hell will happen, but the thing thats going in my head why the crap me and why he wont leave me alone, and why he has to be such a nice person and is not a jerk at all, it would be easier to resist and go away if he was just a bit jerky..but nooo he's a cool person to be around with, and we acted such like children, it was such a refreshment...I never act like a child anymore, lol.

In the end, Im confused why he'd like me, and if his friends are correct they are saying he likes you, and to make me more pissed he knows that deep down I do like him and in one convo discussing coldness he said something that still give me chills...I'm warm and we both know what I mean.. ahh I was ready to kill him when he said that, at the same time, when I talked to his friend about another guy first thing he asked me if I like him which I dont anymore, but yes.

To make this situation all funnier, Im usually the paractical one, saying dump her, go out with her, and as one of my friends said, welcome to being a teenager Im sure you'd love your own paractical advise to get through this..lol 

This would all be easier to deal with if I just wasnt insecure with myself, but I am, and that causes lots of confusion in itself

whew, this board is good for venting,  hah. Now I realize how much I appreciate being single, lol cool.gif

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wow, it would be easier to deal with it if I knew he was using me, if I knew all he wanted from me is sex, and if he actually understood how insecure the thing is

Ive dealt with such guys, and reject them on the spot, I know his friends the situation's a lil more complicated BUUT

Im confident enough to knwo what Im worth and that is

Nobody takes advantage of me

and I DO NOT like ppl just cause they like me

The thing is, I vowed not to get into any relationship in teh teenage years, and have given up on boys cause most are stupid, and now what I dont understand I think he's the first person that Im hesitant to reject, which is strange.

And thats why Im a little strange about the age difference, but all my friends made a point I have friends all of ages, and if he was a friend, I wouldnt look at the age, and most of my friends did date older guys, and we do talk, not to mention he'd be dead if he actually took advantage of me.

Im being completely careful, the whole confused thing is, why me, and this is breaking my rules this situation

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wow, it would be easier to deal with it if I knew he was using me,  if I knew all he wanted from me is sex, and if he actually understood how insecure the thing is

Ive dealt with such guys, and reject them on the spot, I know his friends the situation's a lil more complicated BUUT

Im confident enough to knwo what Im worth and that is

Nobody takes advantage of me

and I DO NOT like ppl just cause they like me

The thing is, I vowed not to get into any relationship in teh teenage years, and have given up on boys cause most are stupid, and now what I dont understand I think he's the first person that Im hesitant to reject, which is strange.

And thats why Im a little strange about the age difference,  but  all my friends made a point I have friends all of ages, and if he was a friend, I wouldnt look at the age, and most of my friends did date older guys, and we do talk, not to mention he'd be dead if he actually took advantage of me.

Im being completely careful, the whole confused thing is, why me,  and this is breaking my rules this situation

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And one more thing, another thing is, I DONT like the situation Im in,

and if he wanted to use me just to make out, he would already and forget about me

Pika, that was funny.

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Guider, interesting point...guider do u have aim? Since two of us have no lives and are sitting on the computer, we might as well talk on messenger its better

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And one more thing, another thing is, I DONT like the situation Im in,

and if he wanted to use me just to make out, he would already and forget about me

Pika, that was funny.

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um, no he wouldnt..Im around people and Im known to be innocent, and he hasnt gone far with girls as well, if he would want sex, he'd first make out with me, no? But yea, Im being smart about it, its just as my firends say, its my first time in such a situation I dont like to see myself get hurt at all NOW GIMME YOUR AIM/MSN I PMED YOU

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Emily,

First off you are from Nor Cal right? The "hella's" you used tipped me off. So we have something in common (I think)

Hey you are 15, and I'm 22 and not a day goes by where I don't wish I was 15 again. Sounds corny but one day you understand lol. Not that 22 is bad. But it's inevitable that you are going to go through many relationships within the next, hell, 10 years. Don't worry so much about what is going to happen in three weeks when you see him again, or "why" he likes you. The cool thing is, there might be a chance that you two really can bond, and form a relationship, physical or not, that may lead to something more serious down the road. It's not often that you meet someone you are attracted to that you can really really talk to. Ok, I hope that made sense, but here is the thing that stood out in your post to me...You said you are insecure. Well it is very natural to be insecure at 15, but I'm sure there are times where you totally forget those insecurities. (like partying lol) Well you gotta ask yourself why you are insecure and tackle that problem straight on. Me, I thought I was too skinny, so I went to the gym. I dedicated myself to it, and now the skinny issue is not an issue any longer. But now my problem is guess what acne, thats why i came on here.

So, continue to be upbeat and remind yourself to be happy and your best side will always show in front of this dude, and other people in general. Oh ya, smile a lot in front of him, guys like chicks that make em happy. And 17 is not old, I wouldn't date older though cause then they truly will want sex, cause they know what they can get. I'm all about the 2 year gap, then when your 22, a 3 year gap is alright. smile.gif

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I AM from north cal... Im not insecure in the way omgod ahh he can use me, whatever, its more like a lil about my looks, but its fine Im sorrounded with many cool friends, and believe me, I know what you're saying I dont personally care if we stay friends or not, but yep its not like its important as well, hell, Im 15 and just going with the flow smile.gif

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I AM from north cal... Im not insecure in the way omgod ahh he can use me, whatever, its more like a lil about my looks, but its fine Im sorrounded with many cool friends, and believe me, I know what you're saying I dont personally care if we stay friends or not, but yep its not like its important as well, hell, Im 15 and just going with the flow smile.gif

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well you can't go through life avoiding risk. ALl relationshpis have risk. The age isn't a problem. Maybe he likes you because you're nice, rather than just looks alone?

Give guys some credit, we;re not all idiots and out to take advantage of girls

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ANd thats what, polkadots scares me cause I know he's different and if something happens its me Im more scared of...

LBS, I AM from Bay area if u are talking about san jose area yup, and it is with actually my weight..its too much too explain on here gaah

But yes, its not only weight issues its also overall shape issues...if it makes sense

Im thin, just big waist, and legs I cant do anything about

Actually, I just like my face the most

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well emily, you sound like a kind sweet girl. I'm sure the guy see this in you? Don't worry about your body too much. Guys don't obssess about things like that. Well, half decent ones dont. And if they do care about things like that then thy wern't worth it in the first place.

Get to know him, try to see what he's really like. If you truly believe he is a nice guy then thats cool.

SOrry, no help here.

and what was that about him being different? what is it you are scared of?

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GABROOSHIE FAKOOSHIEEE

whts different about him? He seems...I dunno to be like me in a sense? Its actually a comfort zone when Im with him and it seems that I do forget about everything and Im just being silly, and the coolest thing is that we have common friends and those ppl that I respect and are hella cool ppl is what different...thats answering polkadots' question...

Pika, I'll IM you smile.gif

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*sigh*

Im trying to talk to him as a friend, he sees it as a sign I like him, and he doesn;t get when I really joke, but maybe he understands ? I dunno

I think something is bound to happen next time I see him...lets pray I just wont be stupid lol smile.gif

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