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emikaday

im embarrassed in front of my boyfriend and other people

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I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year now and he has seen me with mild acne since we met over two years ago. However about two months ago my acne became moderate to borderline severe all around my mouth and lip area and some on my inner cheeks, but the worst is the cystic acne on my chin that simply won’t go away, I’m talking a new painful bump showing up every 2 days. 

I’ve been rather depressed because of the acne, the pain and the red marks that took over my face. I only want to stay at home and not go anywhere, and I cry almost every night. Just last night I couldn’t sleep a wink because I was up being paranoid about my acne. I used to be able to go out and do whatever, whenever I wanted but now I can’t anymore. I won’t go anywhere I can’t wear concealer to, and when the breakout is severe even concealer can’t help me anyway. I’m thinking about my acne 24/7 and how the next few months or maybe years will be ruined because of the persistent breakout and marks, I do realise it’s not healthy. 

When I’m with my boyfriend at home, I will suddenly break down and start crying even though I try really hard not to. But it’s just so overwhelming. He comforts me all the time and tells me I’m beautiful but I just can’t believe him. And I’m just so scared that if this goes on I’ll push him away or it’ll put a strain on our relationship because of my crippling self-esteem and how I’m putting more and more emotional baggage onto him. How should I start learning to accept my acne so I can be myself around my boyfriend and the world again?

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6 hours ago, emikaday said:

I’m talking a new painful bump showing up every 2 days. 

you need to be proactive and help yourself. google and this forum are your friends. i recommend doing as much research as possible to understand acne, so you can correctly treat yourself.

 

painful under the skin lumps can be due to blocked pores & diet - instead of coming to the surface, the bacteria goes down under the skin, causing lumps and redness.

 make sure your not eating or drinking anything that is triggering hormonal acne.

and have a look at your skin care products / makeup. something might be making your skin worse. ( if you use makeup, try non comedogenic makeup )

 

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9 hours ago, MrBakery said:

you need to be proactive and help yourself. google and this forum are your friends. i recommend doing as much research as possible to understand acne, so you can correctly treat yourself.

 

painful under the skin lumps can be due to blocked pores & diet - instead of coming to the surface, the bacteria goes down under the skin, causing lumps and redness.

 make sure your not eating or drinking anything that is triggering hormonal acne.

and have a look at your skin care products / makeup. something might be making your skin worse. ( if you use makeup, try non comedogenic makeup )

 

Hello. Thank you for your response. 

I’ve been trying to adjust my diet accordingly to help the situation. I’ve also been with my dermatologist for 2 years now and her treatments (tretinoin, other creams etc) have helped keep my acne at bay. It’s just the sudden severe surge that frustrates me because it’s been kept under control until now. My dermatologist has changed my routine slightly and I’m trying to be patient but it’s just difficult to suppress the depressive thoughts and understanding why it’s not as effective anymore or what triggered this suddenly.  

Edited by emikaday

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