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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

LIFE IS REAL FUNNY SOMETIMES.

Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

I'll start off by saying that this has been the craziest year EVER for me.

I fell in love with this girl, tried killing myself multiple times, and bounced from being very depressed to absolutely normal almost every day because of my acne.

And basically all of it was because of ONE girl. Yes i know, very sad. But i really can not help it.

Here's the deal. I became friends with this very hot girl at school (and im very proud of myself because i actually got up and walked over to her and introduced myself, and it took a lot of balls trust me) anyway she is now my best friend and i can not stop thinking about her. I get jealous whenever she hangs out with my brother (he only met her through me, that bastard.)

The thing that drive me bananas is that she HAS A BOYFRIEND (suprise suprise) but she lives with him and i act like her slave whenever she needs me.

But she is really nice to me, for my birthday (my brothers too, were twins) she took us out for dinner and a movie. and on thursday we are going out again to celebrate the last day of school.

I named this thread, life is funny because i know exactly how she feels about me. I'll explain, i have a class with this other girl that is very nice (not my type at all though) but i know she really likes me (what? she likes me with this scared face?!?) she's always talking to me and volenteers to help me whenever im stuck on something and she even got me a early christmas gift (i didn't get her anything) but i only think of her the second i see her, then when class is over i completely forget about her. I started to put myself in her shoes and realized that this is how the girl i love feels about me. She really doesn't give a SHIT about me.

I am completely addicted to her, i even signed up to 2 classes with her next semester just so i can be garanteed to see her again. And guess what? So did my brother and now she has 2 classes with him and then 2 with me. being a twin sucks, and i know he's in love with her too.

I guess i like being with her so much because i can see how everybody gets jealous when im around her (she really is beautiful, green eyes. very thin with a HUGE ass, great brown hair and very cute face, she even had a pimple above her lip the other day, so cute!)

This story my sound familer because i have posted here before but in a different name. Does anybody remember CHUCK? Yeah thats me alright. I'm still in love with that South American chick.

Anyway life is funny though isn't it? I always learn the weirdest shit in the craziest places. I have learned that i should never get this attached to a girl that i have NO chance of being with (im 20 shes 23, im attracted to her and she just sees me as a goofy friend, she even called me a clown the other day because im never serious)

On the bright side she has changed my looks tramendously (i used to look like a bum and now i take care of myself and dress a little better ( but not too much because dressing up to much could be a little gay)

WOW i cant believe i typed all of this so quickly, i just wrote what was on my mind thats all, i think i'll stop here and let you guys give me some feedback.

Anybody in a similar situation?

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Sure I will give you feedback. This is a message board about acne and the psychological effects of it, not relationships. I doubt that your scarred face has anything to do with this friendship. She is just not into you. You made the BIGGEST mistake you could of made when it comes to women. NEVER, and I MEAN NEVER become their friend first! Women LOVE to have guy friends. You know why? So they can ask them questions about guys they are really into. This girl is calling you a "clown"? You know why? Because she knows exactly how you feel about her and she is trying to dissuade you from feeling anything more for her than friendship. When I was reading your post I thought you were in high school. No offense pal, but it is never going to happen. I always loved meeting the "guy friend" when there was a girl involved because all I had to do was act the opposite and it was a lock. I am not an expert and I have been burned and have done my fair share of burning too, but I will give you this advice: STOP the nice guy, friend act. IT DOES NOT WORK. NEVER WILL. And if there are any ladies out there reading this they wont come out and agree with me but secretly they know I am right. Oh and if they are reading this, let me tell you this too. GUYS DO NOT WANT TO BE YOUR FRIENDS. We have one thing on our mind and that is to sleep with you. My wife was shocked when I told her this and all my friends validated my statement. Do you want this girl?? Really want her?? Become aloof, be a dick. Distance yourself and if she does want you then she will call. If not then you know it will never happen and you can move on and look for a meaningful relationship. Sorry for the rant but I cant stand when my fellow comrades try the friendship card and really think it is going to work. STOP BEING HER FRIEND AND BE A MAN!!

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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

Kevin my friend you have just nailed this problem right on the head. Your right I do NOT want to be her friend, i want to throw this girl down and have my way with her EVERY time i see her but instead i play this nice guy shit and get nowhere.

Ok, heres the thing we already have a dinner and a movie planned on thursday, how should i act? still be really nice?

Thank you very much for setting me straight here, and im serious about this.

I'll keep you updated!

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i remember you man. still in the same boat??

I dont recommend being a "dick" to her man. you said she's always really nice to you and such and im pretty sure she'd stop real quick as soon as you change you attitude towards her. She has a BF right?? well not to be harsh or anything but she could drop you like a bowling ball in no time flat if she wanted to...she's already got someone.

how would you feel like that??? you seem pretty whipped to me wink.gif that'd hurt wouldnt it? do you WANT her to hate you??? sure some guys want girls for one reason, but some people actually like the social aspect of things too. do what you feel you think you should do man. the thing is, and i've learned this the hard way as of late, that if it's meant to be, then it will happen. things don't just happen, they happen for a reason, and if she has reason to reciprocte your feelings, she will. give it time, be yourself, have fun, and just remember....life goes on. good luck bro.

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creep dude, I used to be like that. You got it bad. And jeez, not all guys are like (i wanna have my way with her). I'm sure as hell not like that.

Am I weird?

Anyway dude, you never know how a girl feels. Just go the way you are, sometimes the nice guy wins. But if she has a bf then theres owt to do.

Cool post, made me laugh a few times, that twin thing must be annoying. reply back creep!

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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

Yeah polka, the twin thing IS annoying. Because your worst features are more noticable when you are with your twin. People always campare us and think in there head "well, that one has the bigger nose and that one has more zits." or some shit like that and i really hate it.

I just hate being jealous when shes with my brother. For example, this Thursday she and my brother get out of school at 11:30 and i dont get out until 2:00 and she says" oh, i'll just stay with your brother and we'll wait for you to get out" and i say "oh, ok sounds good" but im thinking to myself about my brother" im gonna kill you, you son a bitch, you would have never known her if it wasn't for me"

I dont really know why i got it so bad with this girl, i treat her like a complete goddess for no real reason. I remember we were talking about music and that same day i stayed up late burning a CD for her just so i can give it to her the next day. I think it really payed off though becasue she listens to the CD all the time, and i guess it reminds her of me in a way, i dont know.

Thursday will be the last day i see her until maybe Jan 20 something when school starts again. So it looks like i'll just have to get over her, because i dont want the break to be another one were i miss her, like in the past.

The thing about her is that i practice EVERYTHING im going to say to her the next day the night before, i cant even sleep sometimes and i wake up all tired, it really sucks. I really cant help it.

The whole suicide thing is in the past though, i used to think about that almost none stop, especially whenever i spend like an hour just looking at my scars in the mirror.

The thing about this girl though is she got me to be more social with people, i never ever talked to anyone at school but now i make all kinds of friends (boys and girls). Ever since i made that big step to go over and talk to her, its not so hard anymore.

Since i made that post yesterday it help me realize how i need to change and just move on. I'll still keep her in my life, through e-mail and being in her classes but i think im going to go find my own girl (but damn do i wish it was this girl). There has not been ONE day that went by without me thinking of her or compareing something to her and that needs to change NOW!

I have tried moving on by getting to know other girls but its just not the same. I remember actually there was this one time i was in the school computer lab and i was helping this other girl print her paper and i was thinking to myself "hey THIS girls pretty cute" then walks in the girl i like and i litterally gasped on how much prettier she was than the girl i was helping. She is absolutely gorgerous! Its really weird because im just decent looking and whenever we walk around campus together we ALWAYS get weird looks like "why the hell is THAT girl with THAT guy?"

Well, there i go typing a huge ass post again. I can really go on forever about is girl, it's really sad. But dont worry guys i wont act like a jerk in front of her or anything but i wont act as needy as before thats all.

Thanks for reading! Feedback please!

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easier said then done. He's got it bad. All the classic signs. Dude, you can try and forget, it won't help. Basically you're getting all hung up with no way to vent your feelings for this girl. Do something, anything to get rid of that energy. But don't make an idiot of yourself.

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well you never know anyway man, I thought I had found the right girl, dated her, and realized the distance between us was too much. Don't get me wrong, we had a great time together, and she will ALWAYS have a piece of my heart, but I guess people change, and everyone's gotta learn sometime. sad.gif

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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

Yeah, somtimes i find myself talking to her and there's just nothing, nothing clicking and i think to myself "why do i even like her so much?" i could be talking to her and she would just say "huh? im sorry i wasnt listening" i would then laugh and repeat what i just said.

But other times we are so funny together and i see how we have the same sense of humor and she rubs my knee as she laughs or grabs my shoulder and it just makes me feel alot better. and i really miss her because i really enjoy those fun moments we have.

We even went out of town together for a school project so we rode the transit there and we laughed the whole way there and just had a great time together.

Yeah, it wont be easy letting her go but i know i have to do it before it kills me. She will ALWAYS be something special to me, every time i see a great ass i'll think of her and all of her other great features.

But that's the thing polka, i ALWAYS make an idiot of myself, sometimes she gets a real kick out of it and other times i can see that im being to much and she probably gets annoyed but doesnt say anything. I just gonna tone it down a little from now on.

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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

ME?! Yeah im here alright! Just thinking about some things thats all. Listening to some music and stuff.

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thats good. Thinking is good. But don't think too much, that'll get you into all sorts of problems.

Did you get my pm?

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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

pm? i sorry im not to good with that stuff. I didnt even know i had one. Where do i check it? Sorry!

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Tomorrow is Thursday. What are you going to do. Try the honesty card. Come clean and ask her for a meaningful relationship and see what she says. If she just wants to be friends tell her you cant have that. You will be better off in the long run. And notice that the post from Elsa disagreed with me on one point and none of the others. From her picture she looks like an attractive girl, what do you think Elsa? What should this poor guy do? I still say be aloof. After you cut off the friendship because of the way you feel she will attempt to get back into your life and will want to "talk". Don't buy it. It's one of the sneakiest tricks they use. HAHA. Treat it like a war. No relationship worth having ever falls into your lap. You have to work at it. And if she isn't worth the chase (and if you arent either for that matter) then the relationship is not worth it. Just my humble opinion. I grew up with three females. All older sisters by thye way, and these theories of mine have been proven in the past. Funny thing is, is that my wife will do something completely off the wall sometimes and it never fits into any category. They are an ever changing species. Always adapting. But ultimately, worth it.

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Great post, i enjoyed reading it and yeah i do remember your old post under your other name. Im replying to give you a little bit of advice, if your in love with this girl then you really need to break off your friendship and move on with your life for your own good. It's hard i know but from reading in between the lines she sees you as her bitch to put it bluntly and you'll be her bitch until you either tell her straight out i love you and want to be with you, if she refuses then you just have to move on. Your only hurting yourself and giving her this power she doesnt deserve over you. Say she got burnt in a fire and looked hideous, im betting you could move on just fine then smile.gif Only life experiences will teach you these things, ive done it and had it done to me and well my philosophy now is... Be a MAN! when you become a MAN woman will be all over you, if thats what u want from life smile.gif

Its funny m8, looking back on things regardess of weather a girls a 6/10 or a 10/10, if you be cool, laid back, independant and a with a i dont need anyone attitude, girls will hassle to be with you. Yet if you act keen, it's quite the opposite, let the girls chase, they enjoy it, admit it girls if your reading this, do you like guys ringing you all the time? wanting to spend time with u alot etc etc, irony to this is, if we dont do that then you girls do it and then you wonder why we run smile.gif

Well im babbling now,

later buddy.

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Interesting point by oz, but are you all forgetting she is already involved? You can't go trying to woo the girl in that situation. Im sure the boyfriend will be pi$$ed off.

Look dude, this ain't some disney movie. From what you say, you have a long time with this person. Don't charge in. The girl might get a bit weird.

I dunno.

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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

So i've been back from my little date for a couple of hours now and i've finally decided to let you all know what went down on this "BIG" day of mine. I'll start off by saying i see this whole mess in a COMPLETELY different light now.

WARNING THIS IS A LONG LONG LONG STORY

(take you time and read it please.)

My day stared off at around 5 am this morning. I couldnt even sleep thinking about what was going to happen today (dinner and a movie with the girl ive been CRAZY about this whole year..and also with..my...brother...bastard!) Also,the last day i see this girl in 2004 before she leaves to her country. It felt as if THIS was the grand finale of the year that was all basically about her (to me anyway)

Well, i got up at 5:30 am because i just couldn't lay down in bed any longer and also because i had an english final at 7 am

I washed up, combed my hair, ate breakfast and eventually dragged myself to school along with my brother.

I KILLED the final, i got like an A+++...+. I did a great job!

Ok, i have to admit i kinda rushed through the final because i wanted to see the girl (her class started at 8 am). So after class, i went to the parking lot to see if she was at school yet. I saw her car there (she already went to class) and she actually parked right next to my car. So i didnt know if i should wait the hour until she gets out of class to see her or just go, so i was kind of in a knot. I waited for about half an hour in my car and got a little restless and thought i should drive down to the school computer lab (where we first met) and wait for her there since occansionally we meet there. I looked at the clock almost every 30 seconds, i really kid you not on this. I really dont know why i STILL act this way for this girl, i get all nervous on what im going to say the second i meet her and how will i make her laugh and so on.

I gave in eventually and right before her class was about to get out i decided to get back in my car and drive up to see her come out of class. As i drove up the hill, i saw her car coming around the corner. My heart was racing like a fucking horse and as she approched i raised my hand to wave and she just WOOSHED right by me with a smile waving and that was it. THAT WAS IT! THAT! was IT! I was racing around school for what A milisecond of seeing her. Since i was going the opposite direction i didnt just want to do a u-turn and follow her and make it look like i was stalking her (right).

After getting a little pissed on what just happened, i decided to go home and just leave my brother at school while I gave my poor brain a rest and just sit back in bed with music, waiting for my next class to start (11 am). Of course i was listening to some sappy love songs and my occasional depressing music.

After some rest, i decided to get to class early. After a 10 min drive or so to school, with no radio on, just the sound of the wind passing me by as i drove to school thinking about my life and "other" shit. i got there finally and still tired as hell. Well, it got a little worse for me when i found out my class DIDNT START UNTIL TWELEVE!..........AHHHHHHHH! I was so mad when i got there to an empty room with the lights off. I thought to myself "Should i just wait or should i drive all the way home and listen to my sappy love songs?"

So, i decided to go back home and as i drove back down the hill i noticed the girls car coming around the corner, i got kind of scared but excited at the same time and after a closer look i noticed there were two people in the car. I was at a stop light and she was going around the corner away from me so i couldnt see who it was. Green light came up and as i got closer i saw that it was my bastard ass brother in there with her, i knew because i could recognize that big ass head of his anywhere. I literally squeazed the SHIT out of the steering wheel. They stopped off at a local gas station and i just drove right by. I dont know why i got THAT angry but i did. I was speeding all the way home still with no music (just wind) and at that moment i almost cried because right then i noticed how SHITTY life was for me getting mad over this when shes not even my girlfriend, i dont know but it hit me real bad right then.

I stayed home for probably 1 1/2 minutes, just enough time to wash my face because it was getting oily (damn all this stress). I jump back into the car and raced back to school. I approched the parking lot and saw her car there and i parked and entered the school and saw them both at the food stand waiting in line. I pretended not to see them at first but eventually whistled from a far and they turned around and waved (those bastards..yes i even started to hate her right then) i yelled that i had to go to class and i'll see them in an hour. And walked away with my head down.

I walked into class and saw that it was only 11:35! I got a little mad and wondered if i should go back and see if they were still there. I thought about it for like 2 seconds and walked back to where they were. They werent there. I looked around a bit and saw them in the main building, i walked up to them and she says "I thought you had a class?" I mumble "Yeah, but i got there early, so i have a half an hour left!" she says "Wait, What? What did you say? I couldn't hear what you said." I realized i was speaking too low and i repeated what i just said and felt like a real idiot. She then says "Did your brother tell you?" I say "Tell me what?!" "Unfortunetly i cant meet you guys for a movie today, we will just have lunch or something." she says. I tell here no problem and not to worry about it (damn im too nice)

So we then walk down stairs and find a table to sit at. We started to chat a bit and asked each other the usual "how are you" blah blah blah. I evetually start making here laugh with my quirky comments here and there about everything. I start to get comfortable with her again and just when we start to hit it off like we always do, i look at the clock and it already 11:58. So i say my goodbye and leave her there with that bastard. And he never says ANYTHING during these conversations either, he just sits there like a big doof.

This story is getting a little too detailed so i'll speed it up a bit.

I go to class, come back out an hour later and find them still there chatting away. They pick up there stuff and off we go. On the way to the parking lot we decided to go to CHILI's for the resturant. We all agree and I jokingly hand my brother the car keys and say i'll get a ride from the girl they both say "WHAT?" and i say "Just Kidding." and that was one of the things i had planned while i was laying down in the morning, i would make my brother drive the car and i would get a ride with the girl and it would be really cool on the last day, BUT that didnt happen.

I said id lead the way but as we took off with her right behind us, i noticed i didn't know where CHILI's was. My brother says he knew so i trusted him. As we drive i ask him "So, how come were arent going to the movies?" he says "Because her boyfriend was getting jealous of her taking us out and stuff and he said she could only go to dinner, and they fought about it alot and so..". It then hit me again right there, "What the fuck am i doing?" i thought to myself. Why am i doing this to another guys girl? I would HATE it if she did the things she did with me with another guy. I mean, shes gone to San Francisco with me, to the movies before, studies with me after school and i started to look at it in his point of view and i got jealous.

But, we were already on our way there so, i ask my brother where we are going and he says "no, your going right, keep going". Of course the bastard leads me the wrong way and we end up leading her though some neighborhoods and shit. I laught it off because i can see her laughing and smiling in my rear view mirror giving me that "what the heck are you doing?" look. After arriving at a DEAD END! I pull over and tell her i dont know where the hell im going and she says "You guys are funny, i'll lead the way" so she does just that. She actually just goes right around the corner and we are back on track. I then remember were it is and i speed up to get in front of her to lead the way again (and all of this felt JUST LIKE a movie, i swear!)

Ok, so FINALLY we arrive at CHILI's. We park our cars and after we get out we all joke on how last time we went to the movies together, i slammed into a parked car while i was parking and how panicked i got over it. (that was my first accident ever by the way, not to mention myfirst hit and run and she also witnessed my first ticket and also was there the SECOND i turned 20, which are all pretty cool to remember.)

We get a table in the resturant and look over the menues and since shes a health nut i was a little worried on what to get and figured what the hell and i just got a Steak with mashed potatoes.

Dinner went REALLY nice. Nothing romantic at all (especially since that bastard was there). As we were eating and making jokes about the waiter and other things, i noticed how close our FRIENDSHIP is, its great. I can tell her anything. We talked about each others parents and how our upbringings were similar, i even told here how i always lie about everything and she got a kick out of the stuff i lie about. But one moment that hit me was when her cell phone rang and she looked at it then at me, and said her boyfriends name and then just TURNED IT OFF! I was shocked but worried at the same time, i thought about how he might be feeling and I just felt bad. After we were all full, she said she had to get going and i said i would be fine with that. (again my brother brought NOTHING to the conversation) I paid for dinner and joked with her that i sold my TV JUST for this dinner and she said i was cute. We walked to the parking lot and she starts to say "Well, it been a great year knowing you two.." and pauses for a while and looks at us and just laughs. Then we all laugh because it was going to be a serious moment and we NEVER have any of those. Ayway i was kind disappointed that she laughed like that but oh well. I then brought up how we first met and we remeniced on that great moment (in the lab). She said she was going to be leaving for her country on Sunday and she'll be back next year and she'll see us then. It was a very short goodbye but a very good one i think. We left on a VERY good note. Actually right before we left she took a picture of me making a wierd face with here phone and we laughed looking at it. My brother and i got in the car and drove off and she stayed in here's talking to her boyfriend. I drove of and that was that. Actually she did catch up to us and we had a very funny racing moment and made faces at each other.

I noticed thoughout this day that, i have changed tramendously this year but not really much at all...if that made any sense. I saw that look in her eyes today the same as they were when we first meet, not attracted to me but looked happy to see me because i am good person. I know for sure she does not have the feeling for me like i do for her. Even typing this it makes me sad because i care for her so much. I'm very glad we have this month break because i know i will be evaluating my life a whole lot these next few weeks and seeing where i stand with and without her. I know for sure though i do NOT play a major role in her life, although im glad i play a small part of it because she is so great but i see she HAS who she wants, she doesnt NEED me. I dont know, but i really wouldnt have this year go any other way, i look back at the moment we first meeta and where i am now and all the stories i got now and i am BLOWN AWAY on what has happened. Yeah i would have like it end with her spending Christmas with me, but hey, thats life.

We have two classes together next semester and she said shes looking forward to it and i just loved hearing her say that.

There i go typing a super long post again, but i can really type forever on this subject.

I hope some of you learned some leasons here, if there are any that is but in retrospect, what a year i had chasing this girl, from the early cold days of Febuary to the hot days of summer, to today, its been crazy thats for sure.

I guess i'll leave it at that and let you all bash me on how i let this one slide but i know deep down i did the right thing by just moving on, or trying to at least.

Peace.

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Guest !CiRiEiEiP!

Do you guys REALLY enjoy reading my experiences?

I just think its fun sharing this stuff with you all, it kind of helps me reflect on where i am right now in life.

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