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Pumpercrib

How acne has affected my mental health

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I'm a 28 year old male and this is how acne has affected my mental health. Iv had three 'full rounds' of roaccutane since I started suffering from acne at around 15. 
When my acne got severe when I was around 18 I developed an anxiety disorder because of it. All day every day all could think about was my skin, couldn't look in mirrors, couldn't make eye contact, missed so many nights out with friends, waking up and feeling more cysts and crying, not being able to concentrate on studies, phobia of touching or people touching my face, feeling ugly, feeling like everyone is staring at your skin, thinking no girl would be attracted to you etc etc. I'm sure most of you have experienced similar things. Safe to say it was the worst time of my life but its amazing how its still affecting me today.
Like I said I eventually went on roaccutane which completely cleared the acne, although I was left with scars on my cheeks. Unfortunately i relapsed a year or so later, although not as bad, which resulted in me going on another round of roaccutane, but now a relapse was in my mind so any time I got a spot or eventually a small cysts I would freak out thinking I'm going to relapse and develop more scars so my anxiety would start to spiral out of control, which in turn caused more stress which caused more acne! Viscous cycle!! Eventually I had to go on my third round of accutane which completely cleared me again, but now I constantly think about relapsing and there are periods where my brain reverts back to 18 year old me where I can't look in mirrors, struggle to make eye contact and think im ugly even though my skin is clear! And I constantly get hot flushing thinking about my skin which makes me think I'm going to give myself acne again and again my anxiety starts to spiral!
 That has to be the worst part about acne, the more you stress about it the worse it seems to get, which makes you more anxious\stressed\depressed. Its a very hard cycle to break. 
Anyway that's what acne has done to me. Even once we have cleared it the emotional affects can stay with us years later. Starting councilling soon to try overcome these effects. Would be good to hear how acne has affected others mental health if anyone has bothered reading this. 

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Maybe try and find a new hobby or activity that can really take your mind off it and also release a lot of stress such as going to the gym and lifting weights.

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