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Encouragement for The Scar Suffer / How to Not Fall For The Beauty Before & Afters / BDD - Body Dysmorphic Disorder

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151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 10/16/2017 5:10 pm

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(@marrakech)

Posted : 10/16/2017 11:19 pm

These are awesome results. 50% blah blah... I agree, you can get 100%. I believe it. How? There was a spot on my face that was pretty much 3 large box scar connected. Very deep.
After working on them for so long, one of the scars 'disconnected' from others, and healthy tissue regenerated in between. 100% filled in that one area, with pores and everything!! And the one scar is slowly drifting away as this normal tissue is regenerated. If this can be done in one spot over a very deep scar, this can be done anywhere. What triggers some areas to regenerate faster and more successfully than others, I do not know. 'Untethering' the scar definitely helps.

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 10/23/2017 3:56 pm

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51
(@arte90)

Posted : 10/23/2017 4:45 pm

" People dont loose hope in acceptance! Accept yourself and your journey after treatments, not before. "

This is very, very dangerous advice. These success storiesare anomalies, not the norm. This is publication bias at its finest.
It's good to have hope, but not false hope. Accepting yourself should not be dependent on things you can not control, like the outcome of treatments.

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Guest
0
(@Anonymous)

Posted : 10/23/2017 5:33 pm

Well yes,if your gonna post pics your obviously gonna post pics of the most successfull results.so not realy representative of the average result.posting the average results is more realistic but these pics serve (if genuine) as examle of the outcome on these individials,for arguing sake,the arguement still continues on what you can and cannot achieve for most.

i am getting some pretty good results from just tca work but i got no before pics.

just tca work on mild/moderate scarring over time gets results,your skin cant help itself but heal regardless.you just cant heal significantly deeper stuff with wrong modelty.
:)

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 10/23/2017 5:59 pm

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 02/05/2018 6:28 pm

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MemberMember
86
(@scarright)

Posted : 02/05/2018 9:02 pm

Name of scar revision specialist? Please Include that if somebody is posting results.

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 02/05/2018 9:23 pm

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 02/05/2018 9:39 pm

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MemberMember
86
(@scarright)

Posted : 02/05/2018 10:47 pm

1 hour ago, Candy Says said:
@ScarRight first photos from mongclinic.com
lady from plastikinstitutet.se
last guy from drlaserllc.com but im not sure about this one.
A lot of photos can be stolen.
More interesting which treatments were performed.

Did you personally had these treatments? Of course doctors are onky going to put their best. I thought this thread was people actually documenting their own treatments. Otherwise very pointless if you do not even know what scar procedure was actually done.

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 02/05/2018 11:03 pm

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MemberMember
86
(@scarright)

Posted : 02/06/2018 12:54 am

3 hours ago, Candy Says said:

Point of this thread is givin people idea that 50-95(100) % improvement is real in some cases. this really can help mentally for those who have not done anything yet. I do not guarantee this outcome.
Lady treated by facelift, fat graft and some laser.

All of those photos were probably photo edited and there might be swelling prevalent. This thread is rubbish, it's going to give false hope and unrealistic expectations. 75-100% is rare, otherwise everybody would get that and there wouldn't be so many posters with unsuccessful results. Scar revision is difficult to treat.

let me see...
We don't know what stages of recovery these photos were taken.

We don't know what scar procedure was performed.

We don't know how many treatments were performed.

We don't even know if any of these pictures are influenced by photo editing or lightning. Are they even legitimate?

We don't know the success rate. How many failures in ratio to these photographs?

Well... What's there to worry about.

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MemberMember
456
(@sirius-lee)

Posted : 02/06/2018 2:58 am

2 hours ago, ScarRight said:

All of those photos were probably photo edited and there might be swelling prevalent.

If you look at the dude's chin in the two middle pictures, you can see that the swelling is still present. His nose appears wider in the second pic as well.

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 03/05/2018 7:19 pm

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MemberMember
86
(@scarright)

Posted : 03/05/2018 7:58 pm

On 3/5/2018 at 7:19 PM, Candy Says said:

HOW? maybe angle is different and he is obviously with make up, but skin is muuuch better. I wouldnt notice a single scar if I do not know him
itagaki.jpg
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It's called using Photoshop, my friend.

So what treatment did he use? How many? I do not believe results from dermatologist websites, they are not a true indication of the realistic result you should expect.

How about if this board collates all the successful stories by members from this board? That would be a lot more beneficial, because we can get photos, treatment details and even the doctor that did the treatment.

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MemberMember
151
(@candy-says)

Posted : 03/05/2018 8:27 pm

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MemberMember
35
(@seattlegal90)

Posted : 03/05/2018 10:15 pm

I think I need to stop stalking this site. These debates are soooo depressing lol. One person is trying to offer support to the forum by sharing hope, the other is trying to help by adjusting expectations. It's soo easy to become extremely obsessive over these skin problems. It really really sucks being in this situation. I wish i knew someone in real life who understood what this does to a person mentally. I think im having a terrible day. Ill delete this comment later :/ lol 

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MemberMember
1750
(@beautifulambition)

Posted : 03/06/2018 2:44 am

@seattlegal90I really do get it, that's why I try to help people here. But in the same vein it does get overwhelming when people have BDD and expect perfect skin, do the procedures wrong, expect things like subcision to be magical and make "perfect skin," base these treatments off their self worth, and do not want to wait the time it takes for the treatments (often 3 years). Can you imagine someone basing their whole self worth off their healing capabilities, which may be poor or a auto immune disease, that is what happens for some and it's sad. Stress and worry aka Cortisol also makes the body worse. It really is a roller coaster of ups and downs. I get it. I have had scars, I have scars, and I help treat others with scars.

The best thing you can do is not obsess over it. Being here is mentally draining. Get everything you can, ... get a plan and get into a good space of mind. I think the issue as well is many are dealing with severe psychological issues and not just scars. They come here to find perfection and expect nothing less. Look at the people with very minor scars in the Scarless Healing Skin TE post they have tiny minor scars and want to wait for skin TE to have "perfect skin." This is very silly and foolish. They could be fixed now and move on with life.

There are people who do not leave the house daily and instead post here. The sum takes a toll. We are not just dealing with your issues but theirs stacked on top. Everyone should get outside and take a walk or a hike, do events with their friends and family, ... do things like they. Find enjoyment in other un realted activities. A very worthwhile investment in the USA is Talkspace, a app for the smartphone. For a small monthly fee you can have unlimited therapy through text, video, or voice to hash out these issues. Also you can get cheap therapy at a college even if you don't goto one. Therapy supports you where this forum cannot. That is the remaining part of scar treatment getting into the mental space to accept it or realize why it's a issue for your. No amount of treatments will fix that part, ... it becomes a vicious cycle.

Regarding "adjusting expectations" I often do this. I have seen many even try to commit suicide because their Dr lied to them and their friends, or family. I just don't want to give false impressions, so I try to be overly real. But there is hope, a light at the end of the tunnel, and even some relief. We offer improvement, where many doctors cannot, and offer real things that work without taking your money or selling you something. That is powerful.

Don't get caught up in these social media pictures of perfection, they are the people who think they are ugly themselves and get treatments. They have ugliness inside that no amount of superficiality can fix. Life is funny, while your burden may be scars, I like to think it gives empathy and grounds us in a way many things cannot. Many have to learn latter the harshness of this through aging and superficiality that we experience earlier in our journey.

I am not a Buddhist but I think this is interesting: "You are more than the vessel you inhabit. Cultivate that."

Be Well,
BA

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MemberMember
35
(@seattlegal90)

Posted : 03/17/2018 11:29 pm

@beautifulambition Im sorry i didnt reply to this earlier as everything you said meant a lot and knowing you took the time to reply. People dont realize someone taking the time to actually relate or say something nice during a low point can go a long way. I didnt respond because i felt i would be more negative to the forum than anything in the moment, and people are coming here for hope.

I definitely have a horrible, horrible case of BDD. I try really hard to not think about or focus on it. I dont look in mirrors anymore. I go through ups and downs, im usually so busy working I am distracted enough that i cant focus on it for too long. Then something happens and i question my whole self worth like you mentioned.

On 3/5/2018 at 11:44 PM, beautifulambition said:

Can you imagine someone basing their whole self worth off their healing capabilities, which may be poor or a auto immune disease

Its hard not to when we live in a world where appearance is how we are judged initially. Do some people look past these things when they get to know someone, sure.. but there's a whole process getting to that point, and it takes so much peace within yourself to do this with every new person you meet. Its hard and emotionally exhausting.. The reason i havent tried/planned anything yet is my acne isnt under control,and i have tried EVERYTHING for that. And now because of accutane ( 5 years ago) im scarring so easily from any breakout. Im trying to get it under control. I just tried a anti inflammatory diet. So far its about the same. My last hope is to try birth control as i have PCOS.

I wasnt siding with one person over the other i completely agree you have to be realistic, the level of devastation is far too high if you expect miracles. I think if anything i am more on the hopeless side of improvement, even though i know some people have been successful. I also get why someone was trying to give out hope. I think both are important.

One reason i wanted to respond to this, other than to thank you, is to ask how you personally overcame your emotional issues with scarring ( as you said you still have some). Was it through scar treatment? You had to reach a point that left you feeling satisfied? Therapy? Did you reach acceptance on your own? If so, how did that come about? I am at a point in my life where i hate how mentally debilitating this feels more than the scars itself. I would rather have peace and acceptance with it and THEN work on improving them, rather than find peace from reaching a 'acceptable' amount of improvement. I truly believe if i were to wake up tomorrow looking how i used to i would not feel a sense of peace at all, because in most cases, scarring causes so many mental/emotional problems.

Anyway, I know this is a forum for discussion on treating the actual scars, but i feel like there are two sides you have to treat. The scars themselves, and the emotional and mental side of it. I thought about creating a post asking what other people have done to cope or reach acceptance.

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(@beautifulambition)

Posted : 03/18/2018 7:45 am

@seattlegal90It's ok I had a feeling you needed a break 😉

You asked for some tips to deal with scars, BDD, and treatments not working. I don't have the bandwidth to deal with both the emotional and scar cases, nor do I feel I could do the full justice and attention everyone needs (I mean this in the nicest way). This is where Therapy really does help support one through the process. I think far to many are dealing with their own issues here and this is where you get a heaviness or compounding, and it starts to weigh on posters here. Hence why I suggest get a game plan, do what's best for you, and disconnect or take a break when needed.Here is a generalized list of some ideas.

* Therapy, ... few here can offer this level of understanding and depth to see what the cause of the BDD is and deal with it. This is a very important step. There is a Smart Phone App Called Talkspace which is great for therapy (text, video, call). Also colleges offer reduced rates even if your not a student. Friends while great cannot fill this space. When you plateau on results or it becomes unbearable this is what helps as well. Stress and worry can cause worse skin issues, and this deals with that.
* Gym, Endorphin's are a great way to get you into a happy space. I have seen many guys and gals become happy with their appearance and somehow that helped with everything else (weather they fixed their issue or not). They became more self confident and healthy.
* Naturapathic / Herbalist / Homeopathic /Holistic / Chinese Herbal - Eastern Medicine / Ayurveda / Integrated Health - Sometimes the issue is the gut and it manifests in the skin. These practitioners can work on this part of you where many doctors throw antibiotics which can make things worse. It's more than taking a supplement, it's a lifestyle. Clean living, healthy diet / food (is a big one), understanding what is bad for us out there and good. Even someone with a scientific based mind can find help in some of this in conjunction with western medicine. Cleanses of the liver, kidneys, and intestines. Stay clear of the hucksters who have a magical solution or charge high prices for a cure. If it does not work in a few months, stop doing it.
* Self Improvement - Improve other parts of your life, so you can get courage and success.
* Helping Others / Volunteering- Often the Scar Suffer or those with BDD are stuck seeing only what is wrong with themselves instead of seeing that the world around them is not perfect. Help others, it's very gratifying and gives back many benefits. The focus becomes not about yourself but a servants heart. It's a good way to distract.
* Religion - Focusing on something more than yourself. Working on what's inside rather than the outside. Finding purpose.
* Take a Walk - Get some fresh air and sunshine. If you live in a place with fog most of the year you may have Seasonal Disorder and need a sun lamp. Many are trapped inside and hiding from their issue. This is not healthy both physically and psychologically.
* Do something you love.
* Anti - Depressants or Natural Anti Depressants - Many need help coping, consult a Dr. Always look at the side effects and how they effect the skin.
* Hangout with the Friends or Do something Nice for your Family - Support
* Improve Yourself ( School, work/career improvement, classes, hobbies, learn new things, read books). Improve the things you can improve, and don't focus on the ones you cannot.
* Makeup / Skincare - "Makeup Addiction" and "Skincare Addiction" are both excellent subs on reddit.com , learn as much as you can. Many more members than here. Some scientists and professionals post there. Repositories of Knowledge.
* Sleep - many don't get enough of this.
* Disconnect / Avoid Certain Media - Did the Buddhist Monks know something we don't or the Amish. Society wants to tell you your ugly (so they can feel better about themselves), that you should look like photos, or buy new treatments and products. What if this was not a constant message marketing, sales, media, and society was sending us, would be easier right. Obsessing on Facebook and Hollywood tabloids will not help you in the long run. So many on Youtube are using filters to give fake makeup results, special lighting, Photoshop, plastic surgery, makeup, special photographers. Those with good genes are not perfect but have far to many ways to hide their imperfections and obsess on the ego Infecting others around them to also be narcissistic - centered on superficial.
* Get rid of friends who are not beneficial to your health and well being - the choice is yours, we are the company we keep.
* Beauty Blogs / Acne / Skincare - Will tell you there is something wrong with you, that is the focus and the goal, to find something else to fix. This isn't reality, it's fake.
* Set Goals and Bucketlists Outside of the Superficial - Achieve Greatness. This could be as simple as finishing a few things on a honey - to - do list.
* Make yourself interesting in other ways besides how you look - We all get old, regret for many is off things they did not do, or chances they did not take, not off how they looked as they get old and naturally age. Perhaps beauty is for the young & vain, and transcendence is for the old and wise (are the the vessel you cultivate inside).

The Serenity Prayer

 

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His Will;
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever and ever in the next.

Amen.

[Media removed]

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MemberMember
456
(@sirius-lee)

Posted : 03/18/2018 8:45 pm

12 hours ago, beautifulambition said:

The Serenity Prayer

 

God grant me the serenity 
To accept the things I cannot change; 
Courage to change the things I can; 
And wisdom to know the difference. 

Living one day at a time; 
Enjoying one moment at a time; 
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; 
Taking, as He did, this sinful world 
As it is, not as I would have it; 
Trusting that He will make all things right 
If I surrender to His Will; 
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life 
And supremely happy with Him 
Forever and ever in the next. 

Amen.

Great advice, man. Wow, my like-o-meter of you just shot up. :D 

Just as we are what we eat, we also portray how we think inside. The best thing we can do is to keep our sanity and think positive about ourselves, inside and out.

Peace.

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MemberMember
424
(@obi-wan)

Posted : 03/19/2018 5:57 am

BA has once again, as always covered this is the best possible way. Acne scars- if I can but things simply can be divided into to 2 issues with a grey area in between. Physical aspect of scar revision, see a good specialist, and they will deal with that. Done, dusted. Second part, EMOTIONAL aspect. You can be your worse enemy and see things how you want to portray. I firmly believe in the objective point of view (some disagree, and I do respect that), objectively if a specialist delivers scar revision so that other can not see your scars, they have succeeded in delivering their promise. Those who overpromise and say 'no more scars' that you can see put fire on the the second issue. The good specialist will address both, but its ultimately up to you to seek the advise of which BA has outlined. If both aspects are dealt with, you are in a good place, and its time to move on.

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