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mDi

Please scare me into stopping.

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So, I just started my second course of Roaccutane so far I've taken about 63 tablets in total but I still pick my skin. I'm Caucasian and nearly 19, I do have some scarring and hyperpigmention and once I'm finished with my journey with Roaccutane I want to get laser treatment to 'fix' all of the damage I've caused. I almost always pick my skin in the shower, I have a handheld mirror in there (may sound stupid but I'm male and share the shower with my sisters who use the mirror for whatever) and I usually pick once I've seen my reflection. I don't really pick outside of the shower so I know it's being in the shower that's triggers me, worth noting that I have extremely long showers. I've scarred my upper arms because sometimes when I'm exhausted I just sit on the floor of my shower and my hands get so touchy on my arms, back, chest and hips. I know my damage isn't extreme but it's caused me to become extremely obsessed and concerned over my appearance. I'm asking, is there any guarantee that laser will fix all the damage caused (either completely or to a point where it's not that noticeable) and also, how do I break this trigger? I'm not going to just stop showering but I don't know what to do. Also, I'm a very paranoid and neurotic person so if anyone can tell me facts that could scare me out of picking, be as extreme as you have to, PM me pictures if it's too NSFW because I want to stop this. I started because of anxiety, whilst I've gotten so much better, the habit is there and I'm officially done with it. I cannot bear the thought of finishing roaccutane and continuing to destroy my skin even after laser treatment.

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I don't really know what to say about the stress picking, but would you be able to turn the mirror the other way before you get into the shower? So you're not triggered to pick at yourself.

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