I'm now 20 years old and acne has been a part of my life since I can remember. I have had it all through high school and I am now just starting to feel the impacts. I honestly can't remember the last time I felt confident and happy with no makeup on. I have hated my natural face for years and it is now taking its toll on me.
I started partying hard in grade 11. I was a wild teenager and I loved being able to let loose, forget about all my worries, get drunk and have fun. I have been partying hard ever since and I have recently figured out that after all this time, and all those nights I can't remember, that drinking has been a distraction. The only time I'm not completely focused on my horrible skin is when I'm drunk or high and that makes me so upset.
My first year of university acted as a distraction itself. I was meeting tons of new friends, doing so many new things, and of course partying...A LOT. my acne was also manageable in first year, like it was in grade 12 so it didn't bother me as much (although I still wore makeup 24/7).
My second year was a lot different. My acne got horrible at the end of the summer and just continued to get worse throughout the school year. At one point it got so bad I had to go home for close to 2 weeks because I couldn't mentally handle people seeing my skin look so gross.
I started skipping a lot of classes, stopped getting out of bed, and focused so much on my skin I couldn't focus on schoolwork. My good grades started going down the toilet and by the time Christmas exams rolled around I couldn't even study. Weed became my go to and helped me get through the day and sleep at night. I became dependant on the high, hoping it would take my mind off of everything I hated about myself.
I became so depressed. I woke up everyday so angry and cried myself to sleep every night. I could barely look people in the eyes anymore and hated when they came close to me. I rarely stand close to a mirror because it hurts so much looking at the damage the acne has caused and all the new pimples that arrive each day.
I was seeing one of my best guy friends at school and it ended and I know it had to do with my skin and how uncomfortable it has made me. It's taken so much away from me including my silliness, conversational skills, and my ability to be comfortable around the person I like.
Everything in my life revolves around my acne. I can't focus on tv shows or movies anymore because I just end up comparing the actors beautiful skin to my ugly skin. I miss out on a lot of events due to my skin and I can't even imagine myself falling in love while I have acne. I feel like I don't even know who I am because I've grown up so self conscious and so focused on my skin I haven't been able to grow as a person and find myself and my purpose.
I used to be so competitive and now I have no motivation and no drive. I'm angry a lot of the time and sad the rest of the time. I find happiness for a split second and then I look in a mirror or touch my face and that happiness is gone. My acne has stolen all the good in my personality and I don't know how to get it back until my skin clears. I'm so scared that I am loosing everything good about me and eventually I won't be able to get it back.
12 hours ago, kootshew said:I'm now 20 years old and acne has been a part of my life since I can remember. I have had it all through high school and I am now just starting to feel the impacts. I honestly can't remember the last time I felt confident and happy with no makeup on. I have hated my natural face for years and it is now taking its toll on me.
I started partying hard in grade 11. I was a wild teenager and I loved being able to let loose, forget about all my worries, get drunk and have fun. I have been partying hard ever since and I have recently figured out that after all this time, and all those nights I can't remember, that drinking has been a distraction. The only time I'm not completely focused on my horrible skin is when I'm drunk or high and that makes me so upset.
My first year of university acted as a distraction itself. I was meeting tons of new friends, doing so many new things, and of course partying...A LOT. my acne was also manageable in first year, like it was in grade 12 so it didn't bother me as much (although I still wore makeup 24/7).
My second year was a lot different. My acne got horrible at the end of the summer and just continued to get worse throughout the school year. At one point it got so bad I had to go home for close to 2 weeks because I couldn't mentally handle people seeing my skin look so gross.
I started skipping a lot of classes, stopped getting out of bed, and focused so much on my skin I couldn't focus on schoolwork. My good grades started going down the toilet and by the time Christmas exams rolled around I couldn't even study. Weed became my go to and helped me get through the day and sleep at night. I became dependant on the high, hoping it would take my mind off of everything I hated about myself.
I became so depressed. I woke up everyday so angry and cried myself to sleep every night. I could barely look people in the eyes anymore and hated when they came close to me. I rarely stand close to a mirror because it hurts so much looking at the damage the acne has caused and all the new pimples that arrive each day.
I was seeing one of my best guy friends at school and it ended and I know it had to do with my skin and how uncomfortable it has made me. It's taken so much away from me including my silliness, conversational skills, and my ability to be comfortable around the person I like.
Everything in my life revolves around my acne. I can't focus on tv shows or movies anymore because I just end up comparing the actors beautiful skin to my ugly skin. I miss out on a lot of events due to my skin and I can't even imagine myself falling in love while I have acne. I feel like I don't even know who I am because I've grown up so self conscious and so focused on my skin I haven't been able to grow as a person and find myself and my purpose.
I used to be so competitive and now I have no motivation and no drive. I'm angry a lot of the time and sad the rest of the time. I find happiness for a split second and then I look in a mirror or touch my face and that happiness is gone. My acne has stolen all the good in my personality and I don't know how to get it back until my skin clears. I'm so scared that I am loosing everything good about me and eventually I won't be able to get it back.
acne can be very disabling, you are still young so chances are if you tackleit right, you'll have a few good decades ahead ofyou.
What treatment are youdoing ?
On 7/27/2016 at 1:52 PM, Keeping_up said:I've been on Accutane for a couple of months now (my second round - my first one was in grade 10) and I still wake up with new spots. The pimples have definitely decreased but my cheeks are now covered in deep scars...so now whenever i get a new spot i have a nervous breakdown because i know its just another scar on my face.acne can be very disabling, you are still young so chances are if you tackleit right, you'll have a few good decades ahead ofyou.
What treatment are youdoing ?
i am turning 20 this year and before this i was blessed with clear skin. but now that i'm attending uni, i got stressed out for a bit which i believe is one of the reasons why i got acne problem. now i don't have that much of acne (it's not severe) but i feel you. you become a lot more self-conscious and insecure.
i hope we both will eventually find a way to get away from this problem.
(i'd suggest you to reduce your alcohol intake bc it's no good for the liver)
11 hours ago, h_idayah said:i am turning 20 this year and before this i was blessed with clear skin. but now that i'm attending uni, i got stressed out for a bit which i believe is one of the reasons why i got acne problem. now i don't have that much of acne (it's not severe) but i feel you. you become a lot more self-conscious and insecure.
i hope we both will eventually find a way to get away from this problem.
(i'd suggest you to reduce your alcohol intake bc it's no good for the liver)
the only way i will be happy is when my skin clears
On 7/27/2016 at 11:09 AM, acne scar obsession said:Acne and the scars it leaves behind have ruined my first two years of college, so I understand your struggle.
i feel helpless....even the best acne scar treatments say they are only 50% effective which sent me into a mental breakdown.