Hello all,

I've been following this site for quite a long time and now decided to ask for help. I've come to a point whereI just cannot deal with this anymore. Everyday I wake up, go to the mirror and my entire day is instantly determined by my acne. It's hard to make plans, keep friends, or have any type of social life. I've had acne since I was 16, I am now 25. I can't remember a day that I have ever been completely clear over these 9 years. I get it on my face, neck, back, chest and arms. Acne consumes my life no matter where I am. I can't look people in the face when I speak to them, I try to avoid conversation as much as possible, and I'm so sick of being envious of other people who don't have to deal with it. The worst part is my best friend, who does the exact same things I do, has perfectly clear skin every day. He can eat pizza, ice cream, work out, sweat and nothing happens, but when I do Ibreakout everywhere. I hardly even call this living, and to think that people don't have to deal with this their whole life makes me sick.

Just like many of you, I've tried many things. SA, Benzoyl Peroxide, vitamins, eating healthy, removing dairy from diet, washing bedsheets, washing pillowcases, drinking lots of water, I completely stopped working out, I tried probiotics, I tried apple cider vinegar, usinga clean toweleveryday...the list goes on and on.

I went to a dermatologist and he gave me some pills that did nothing.I'm contemplatinggoing on Accutane.My acne is inconsistent, it goes from mild to moderate to severe, but I'd average it at moderate most times. I have very drysensitive skin. If I try to squeeze a pimple my skin will look terrible for days so I try to avoid that at all costs, but sometimes I give in and try to pop it. The worst is when you try to pop it and nothing happens and you just have this big red painful mountain on your face for days. I made plans for Halloween but that's all ruined because of acne, which I figured it would. Now I have to think of another excuse not to go out.

This is really the only place I can vent, since I don't talk about my skin with anyone because I'm too embarrassed. Nobody else in my family has this problem soI just got dealt a bad hand I guess. I was hoping I'd just grow out of it at this age but it hasn't gotten any better. I have been working full time so I actually have some money that I can invest into something. I don't want to go to another dermatologist, the last one barely looked at my skin and just threw me some pills. I feel like they're just in it for the money for the appointment so I'll never get an honest evaluation from one.

I feel like since I get it all over my body, it has to be something internal. If it was exclusive to just one body part, maybe it'd be external. I just don't know anymore and I'm so sick of wasting hours and hours of my life trying to find a cure thatI feel doesn't exist.

Please, if any of you have any suggestions for me, I am 100% open minded to anything.

Thanks.