Notifications
Clear all

How To Overcome Social Anxiety?

MemberMember
40
(@hopeless87)

Posted : 09/01/2015 3:09 pm

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

Quote
MemberMember
0
(@stillsearching1)

Posted : 09/01/2015 5:33 pm

When your anxiety gets peaked?

Quote
MemberMember
167
(@jazzguy)

Posted : 09/01/2015 7:14 pm

 

Hi hopeless87, there's a lot of people here in the forums feeling like you so I hope you're feeling the love and support of the community coming your way. Isolation is your enemy...I think getting back to work could be really good for you....it will give you a chance to form some new friendships with colleagues and feel valued for your contribution to the team which will hopefully give your self esteem a boost. Be brave, give some people a chance to get to know you and they will see past the scars that you feel self conscious about.

Quote
MemberMember
144
(@tracy521)

Posted : 09/02/2015 9:54 am

its really hard but force yourself to do 1 thing outside of your comfort zone at least once a week but getting back into working will help a lot too. when i got my scarring i was still working so i had no choice but to be around people all the time but it took me a good 2 years to really get back into seeing all of my friends. i did it slowly though i would see 1 friend every few months that i hadnt seen in a while and then once i felt bold enough i would go to a concert outside with a friend or to a ball game but for a good while sitting outside was really hard for me. i do find the more i am out and about though the less i think about it. i think once you get over the fact that your scarring looks worse to you than to others and that people will still like you even with scars then you can move forward with your life. i'm not saying that once you get over the social anxiety part that everything is going to be easy peasy but i find with time things just get easier to deal with. sending you hugs! i know this is all so hard and its not how you pictured how your life was going to be but it will all be ok.

one more thing too is make sure you are working regularly because i know for me it helps to burn off some of that anxiety and then i listen to a lot of uplifting music everyday to put me in a good mood as well. lastly get some really good high coverage foundation that will make you feel more confident when out in public. i wear dermablend and even though its like a mask because i really layer it on it allows me the freedom to leave my house and feel fairly normal.

Quote
MemberMember
40
(@hopeless87)

Posted : 09/04/2015 12:45 pm

thank you guys for your helpful advice :) i am going to try to give people a chance and try to step out of my bubble once a week a try doing something i wouldnt normally. i feel like i got forced to do that by going to the dentist because my tooth broke. ive had a tooth/dentist phobia for the last 10 years but now its sort of turned into being scared of having someone that close to my face, staring at me for such a long period of time under super bright lights! yikes!!!! i have just been in panic about it for the last few days. but i had my first appointment and now im going to have several more. all of this seems like it will make it easier to come out of my bubble. i will try

Quote
MemberMember
72
(@alexanderj86)

Posted : 09/04/2015 6:01 pm

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

What does exactly scare you?

Quote
MemberMember
40
(@hopeless87)

Posted : 09/05/2015 3:22 pm

 

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

What does exactly scare you?

ive had social anxiety every since i was a little kid. i cant even remember why way back then. but as i got older i just couldnt relate to people. im not a talker. but the last few years my skin got so bad, its all about my skin. sort of like body dysmorphia but i am not exaggerating anything in my head and people are really looking at me trying to figure out what is wrong with my face. it was hard enough talking to people even back when they considered me pretty. now trying to say anything while their eyes are scanning my face and then making eye contact but this look comes over peoples faces where you can tell they are thinking about how tragic my skin is, it just scares me. i hate leaving my house for anything. and i hate that i am making a big deal about this. there was a line in a movie where one guys says to another "you dont have problems. the african woman feeding an entire village with her staving breast, she has problems". so true. im scared that i cant control how i feel.

Quote
MemberMember
72
(@alexanderj86)

Posted : 09/05/2015 4:26 pm

 

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

What does exactly scare you?

ive had social anxiety every since i was a little kid. i cant even remember why way back then. but as i got older i just couldnt relate to people. im not a talker. but the last few years my skin got so bad, its all about my skin. sort of like body dysmorphia but i am not exaggerating anything in my head and people are really looking at me trying to figure out what is wrong with my face. it was hard enough talking to people even back when they considered me pretty. now trying to say anything while their eyes are scanning my face and then making eye contact but this look comes over peoples faces where you can tell they are thinking about how tragic my skin is, it just scares me. i hate leaving my house for anything. and i hate that i am making a big deal about this. there was a line in a movie where one guys says to another "you dont have problems. the african woman feeding an entire village with her staving breast, she has problems". so true. im scared that i cant control how i feel.

Of course you can have problems. The problems that you experience are real.

Are those people really thinking about how tragic your skin is? Have they even said such a thing?

Quote
MemberMember
40
(@hopeless87)

Posted : 09/06/2015 11:37 am

 

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

What does exactly scare you?

ive had social anxiety every since i was a little kid. i cant even remember why way back then. but as i got older i just couldnt relate to people. im not a talker. but the last few years my skin got so bad, its all about my skin. sort of like body dysmorphia but i am not exaggerating anything in my head and people are really looking at me trying to figure out what is wrong with my face. it was hard enough talking to people even back when they considered me pretty. now trying to say anything while their eyes are scanning my face and then making eye contact but this look comes over peoples faces where you can tell they are thinking about how tragic my skin is, it just scares me. i hate leaving my house for anything. and i hate that i am making a big deal about this. there was a line in a movie where one guys says to another "you dont have problems. the african woman feeding an entire village with her staving breast, she has problems". so true. im scared that i cant control how i feel.

Of course you can have problems. The problems that you experience are real.

Are those people really thinking about how tragic your skin is? Have they even said such a thing?

i know not everybody is thinking about my skin when talking to me. but there are definitely some who do. nobody ever says anything, at least until i give them a chance or become friends with them. then people will ask how i got them. someone once asked if it was a vitamin deficiency, someone else asked if i ever thought about wearing makeup to cover it (??? i do!!!), someone else suggested i might be able to stick little pieces fimo clay in my icepick scars to hide them. just that type of thing really. seemingly harmless stuff that actually kind of hurts. i dont know.

Quote
MemberMember
7
(@thenatural)

Posted : 09/06/2015 3:31 pm

I know working out helps me A LOT.

 

I first started in high school, but in the past year I've been working out hard and getting bigger (I'm a guy) so it's helped with confidence. It helps me relax, as it releases endorphins (high sensation). It's the same as "runners high", from when you jog or run.

Quote
MemberMember
72
(@alexanderj86)

Posted : 09/06/2015 6:34 pm

 

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

What does exactly scare you?

ive had social anxiety every since i was a little kid. i cant even remember why way back then. but as i got older i just couldnt relate to people. im not a talker. but the last few years my skin got so bad, its all about my skin. sort of like body dysmorphia but i am not exaggerating anything in my head and people are really looking at me trying to figure out what is wrong with my face. it was hard enough talking to people even back when they considered me pretty. now trying to say anything while their eyes are scanning my face and then making eye contact but this look comes over peoples faces where you can tell they are thinking about how tragic my skin is, it just scares me. i hate leaving my house for anything. and i hate that i am making a big deal about this. there was a line in a movie where one guys says to another "you dont have problems. the african woman feeding an entire village with her staving breast, she has problems". so true. im scared that i cant control how i feel.

Of course you can have problems. The problems that you experience are real.

Are those people really thinking about how tragic your skin is? Have they even said such a thing?

i know not everybody is thinking about my skin when talking to me. but there are definitely some who do. nobody ever says anything, at least until i give them a chance or become friends with them. then people will ask how i got them. someone once asked if it was a vitamin deficiency, someone else asked if i ever thought about wearing makeup to cover it (??? i do!!!), someone else suggested i might be able to stick little pieces fimo clay in my icepick scars to hide them. just that type of thing really. seemingly harmless stuff that actually kind of hurts. i dont know.

I think they just don't understand what is going on. The reality is is that you are allowed to do anything what other people are doing as well.

Quote
MemberMember
16
(@kay789)

Posted : 09/06/2015 8:37 pm

So, it will be helpful to keep your anxiety down in general. I also can't afford regular counseling, but I saw a counseler a few times who gave me some advice that was helpful. Here are things I do daily to keep my anxiety down:

Keep a healthy diet, keep a regular sleep schedule, exercise at least 30 minutes a day, and meditate every day. There is a great app you can get for your phone called Stop Panic and Anxiety Now which has lots of great meditations you can work through. I do one every day and I feel like it's really taught me how to relax when I need to.

 

I also have terrible social anxiety, and not just because of my acne - I get panicked at the thought of having to talk to someone on the phone. It's way worse on particularly bad acne days - there are so many days where I just try to hide from people and stay behind my computer at work. But again, here are some things that help me:

Do other things to your appearance that boost your confidence. Wear a cute outfit, use some eyeliner and mascara, put on some pretty lipstick - you dont need to have porcelain skin to be pretty.

I once read an article about human psychology that helped me a lot - people don't see us the way we wee ourselves. We know what we look like, and have control over it, so of course, we have to analyze our own appearance for problems. When we see other people, it's more about recognition - seeing their whole self. You overlook the tiny details. I remind myself that no one sees my acne as much as I do.

 

Anyway, I know it's difficult. I go through the same things every day, so you're not alone. Good luck!!

Quote
MemberMember
72
(@geekgirl13)

Posted : 09/07/2015 5:42 am

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

 

What does exactly scare you?

 

ive had social anxiety every since i was a little kid. i cant even remember why way back then. but as i got older i just couldnt relate to people. im not a talker. but the last few years my skin got so bad, its all about my skin. sort of like body dysmorphia but i am not exaggerating anything in my head and people are really looking at me trying to figure out what is wrong with my face. it was hard enough talking to people even back when they considered me pretty. now trying to say anything while their eyes are scanning my face and then making eye contact but this look comes over peoples faces where you can tell they are thinking about how tragic my skin is, it just scares me. i hate leaving my house for anything. and i hate that i am making a big deal about this. there was a line in a movie where one guys says to another "you dont have problems. the african woman feeding an entire village with her staving breast, she has problems". so true. im scared that i cant control how i feel.

 

Of course you can have problems. The problems that you experience are real.

Are those people really thinking about how tragic your skin is? Have they even said such a thing?

i know not everybody is thinking about my skin when talking to me. but there are definitely some who do. nobody ever says anything, at least until i give them a chance or become friends with them. then people will ask how i got them. someone once asked if it was a vitamin deficiency, someone else asked if i ever thought about wearing makeup to cover it (??? i do!!!), someone else suggested i might be able to stick little pieces fimo clay in my icepick scars to hide them. just that type of thing really. seemingly harmless stuff that actually kind of hurts. i dont know.

I know exactly how you feel i also have social anxiety and think about my skin constantly. I guess i have just become good at faking it. I wear alot of make up to cover my horrible skin and "act" confident and say all the right things. But inside i just want to run home and hide!

I can't believe how rude some people are commenting about your scars! We all just have to learn to b tough because aside from the acne people are still going to hurt us. I work in a library and have had customers say some really weird things to me. Surprisingly no one has ever commented on my skin - i must hide it well! This one customer told me i was too skinny and went on and on about it like i had some eating disorder. I eat alot - honestly i'm just naturally thin - but i couldnt believe this woman. Another woman once told me i had very thin hair. So now i have to worry about my skin, looking too skinny and my thin hair! I know its hard not to care what people think but we can't let them bring us down. Even the most attractive celebrities have to deal with horrible comments from people all the time.

Quote
MemberMember
72
(@alexanderj86)

Posted : 09/08/2015 6:33 am

The problem lies with them, not you.

Quote
MemberMember
7
(@mdontgiveup)

Posted : 09/08/2015 4:24 pm

does anyone have any advice to help overcome social anxiety from acne and scars? i feel like im getting worse and worse. i pretty much isolate myself. its mostly about my scarring. i have icepick scarring all over my face. if i had to rate my anxiety 1-10 it feels like a 10. somedays just an 8. i wish i had money to go to counselling but i had to much anxiety to go back when i had the chance. its so bad. do you have any tips or ideas or supplements that work for you? im going to have to start working soon and i havent worked for years. when i did back then my anxiety would probably be a 5 on my very worst days. im sick of being so scared

Hopeless87, I can understand your pain to some degree. Acne and scarring affects many people. It has affected you and it has affected me significantly too. It completely changed my life after turning 16. I've isolated myself many times too because of my acne/skin/scars and how I felt about my bad skin. I've worked hard over the past couple years to fight my fears, social anxiety, etc. When I'm out, I try to be as confident as possible, and act as normal as possible. It's hard. I know it's hard and I can just imagine what you have been through, but you're not alone. In my opinion, I feel like I've been through hell too, but I know that giving up is not the answer. I would recommend talking to your close friends/family, anyone whom you can trust and confide in. That really helped me. Exercising/meditating helps too, as some have previosuly mentioned in this post. But in the end, it's ultimately up to you. You have to be strong and fight. You have to face your fears to overcome your fears. I've been scared too and I still get scared when I get a sudden acne flare-ups, etc. It messes with my mind and life, but I know that I'm not the only one going through such pain. There are many others like you and me and we have to set good examples for others... I know it's difficult, and sometimes it just sucks that some of us have had it worse than others. However if we become hopeless and lose all hope as your username suggests, life will have no meaning. You, me, and many others have to overcome our fears and face our fears head on. You can start taking small steps on a daily basis to alleviate your social anxiety. I believe in you, please don't give up.

 

The problem lies with them, not you.

Yeah, that's very true. Those people are just not respectful and nice. Overcoming "what other people think" is a constant challenge, but we really have to believe in ourselves and think about our positive attributes and characteristics.

Quote