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3wishes14

Don't Think I've Ever Felt This Down In My Life, When Will This End?

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This is more of a rant than anything else but supportive words would be appreciated.

I'm 24 and female. I've had acne for 11 years. Isnt that long enough? I've tried topicals, birth control, every antibiotic that exists (most worked but they were ruining my insides so I stopped using antibiotics), and roaccutane in 2010. Un yet here I am again in tears because of my skin.

The worst part is that I'm an adult now, I'm not a student anymore. I can't just hide under my duvet from everyone, I have a job which involves people having to see my face.

My skin has been steadily going down hill since 2011. This year I've had hundreds of tiny bumps appear underneath the skin and they all seem to be coming to a head. My skin has deteriorated incredibly fast over the last 4 weeks. As well as all the small bumps I have 3 very enlarged clogged pores (1 on my cheek, 2 near my jaw) and about 10 active spots. Don't get me wrong my skin was worse when I was 14/15 but I can completely see my skin relapsing back to how it was then.

Went to see a doctor. He was reluctant to refer me to a derm. He offered me antibiotics but I rejected them as they have previously ruined my digestive system. He instead offered me isotrexin and claimed it should be far more effective because I've already had roaccutane. Is this true though, really?

I've been using isotrexin for a week and if anything my skin has got much worse. I've been drinking up to 10 glasses of water a day, eating healthily and even taking 50mg of zinc. Nothing is working.

Even if I go back to the doctor and demand a derm referral, it will be months and months before I can see one- at least February or march. How can I carry on life like this until then? I'm already contemplating phoning in sick to work tomorrow and cancelling all of my weekend plans.

Someone please help me :(

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This is more of a rant than anything else but supportive words would be appreciated.

I'm 24 and female. I've had acne for 11 years. Isnt that long enough? I've tried topicals, birth control, every antibiotic that exists (most worked but they were ruining my insides so I stopped using antibiotics), and roaccutane in 2010. Un yet here I am again in tears because of my skin.

The worst part is that I'm an adult now, I'm not a student anymore. I can't just hide under my duvet from everyone, I have a job which involves people having to see my face.

My skin has been steadily going down hill since 2011. This year I've had hundreds of tiny bumps appear underneath the skin and they all seem to be coming to a head. My skin has deteriorated incredibly fast over the last 4 weeks. As well as all the small bumps I have 3 very enlarged clogged pores (1 on my cheek, 2 near my jaw) and about 10 active spots. Don't get me wrong my skin was worse when I was 14/15 but I can completely see my skin relapsing back to how it was then.

Went to see a doctor. He was reluctant to refer me to a derm. He offered me antibiotics but I rejected them as they have previously ruined my digestive system. He instead offered me isotrexin and claimed it should be far more effective because I've already had roaccutane. Is this true though, really?

I've been using isotrexin for a week and if anything my skin has got much worse. I've been drinking up to 10 glasses of water a day, eating healthily and even taking 50mg of zinc. Nothing is working.

Even if I go back to the doctor and demand a derm referral, it will be months and months before I can see one- at least February or march. How can I carry on life like this until then? I'm already contemplating phoning in sick to work tomorrow and cancelling all of my weekend plans.

Someone please help me

You are not alone. I have also run the gammit of topicals, accutane, antibiotics and yet still i have acne and sensitive skin to boot (can't use topicals). I also have what looks like eczema and discolored skin so....

Stay strong, take it one day at a time and remember that you are not your skin. What's your diet like? There is no such thing as universally healthy as what is good for one persons body can be disastrous for someone else.

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Just keep using isotrexin, its probably one of those products that cause initial breakout. Did u had initial breakout when u were on Accutane? Isotrexin needs time to work. But eventually ur skin will clear up.:)

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Me, too.

I tried adding real food and a little wine, chocolate and cheese back into my diet. Three zits.

You are most certainly not alone! I've canceled a good 3-4 years of my life collectively due to acne.

My botox injector today, an MD (who is also Kim Kardashian's injector,) started telling me to use salicylic acid and take vitamins, cut out dairy and citrus etc. I had to start laughing. He had no idea what I'd been through. So I told him about TCM, Tazorac, Spiranolactone, vitamin D tests- I didn't even tell him about my past with BCP, decades of antibiotics, antibiotic creams, formal skincare training, His jaw was on the floor.

He told me that I'm his first patient of his that has followed his method based on repeated BHA/AHA applications throughout the day- that wasn't completely clear

I told him I was 99% clearer than where I was this summer when I started TCM. He said, still, he can't see why I'd still be breaking out at age 34. I told him that I had severe anxiety, insomnia and constipation that I was doing my best to handle *** all which contribute to acne, if you have any of these symptoms, as well***

I think if everyone on this site got the doctors that failed them together and put them on a desert island, we'd have no more doctors.

However- he did agree with my herbologist that makeup causes chronic cases of acne.

Being a woman- hormones, our unique life changes and pressures, and the societal pressure to wear makeup- is the reason acne is more prevalent with middle to upper class women.

If you get to reading on this site, it may be overwhelming, but you'll find patterns that might resonate with your situation. And lots and lots of support. Like they say in AA, "keep coming back."

Good luck

Edited by ZhenZhu
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I'm 31 and was in the middle of starting a new career but decided to put that on hold because of acne and depression. This site has helped me feel like I'm not alone in this even though it seems it sometimes. I'm becoming more and more confident that I will get through this.. and I already am. Its a tough battle but hopefully you can find ways to give yourself credit for doing your best, thats most important. Hope you find some answers soon. Good luck!

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You are not alone. I have also run the gammit of topicals, accutane, antibiotics and yet still i have acne and sensitive skin to boot (can't use topicals). I also have what looks like eczema and discolored skin so....

Stay strong, take it one day at a time and remember that you are not your skin. What's your diet like? There is no such thing as universally healthy as what is good for one persons body can be disastrous for someone else.

Thank you for your support. My diet is so/so I suppose! I have fruit for breakfast/snacks in the morning, I have a brown bread sandwich with various fillings for lunch and then some form of pasta, pie, chicken etc for dinner (home cooked meals). One day at a time is super hard at the moment because every single day I'm getting more breakouts. In the morning things don't seem as bad because the isotrexin seems to have tightened everything up. But by the time I get home from work i've noticed about 2/3 new pimples.

Just keep using isotrexin, its probably one of those products that cause initial breakout. Did u had initial breakout when u were on Accutane? Isotrexin needs time to work. But eventually ur skin will clear up.

Thank you. My skin was deteriorating so fast before I started isotrexin i'm not sure if maybe my skin would still be this bad anyway even if I didn't start using it. That's the thing.. no I didn't have an initial breakout on accutane? My doctor said that people's skin responds better to Isotrexin if they've already had accutane. How can this be!? I don't understand the science of it!

Me, too.

I tried adding real food and a little wine, chocolate and cheese back into my diet. Three zits.

You are most certainly not alone! I've canceled a good 3-4 years of my life collectively due to acne.

My botox injector today, an MD (who is also Kim Kardashian's injector,) started telling me to use salicylic acid and take vitamins, cut out dairy and citrus etc. I had to start laughing. He had no idea what I'd been through. So I told him about TCM, Tazorac, Spiranolactone, vitamin D tests- I didn't even tell him about my past with BCP, decades of antibiotics, antibiotic creams, formal skincare training, His jaw was on the floor.

He told me that I'm his first patient of his that has followed his method based on repeated BHA/AHA applications throughout the day- that wasn't completely clear

I told him I was 99% clearer than where I was this summer when I started TCM. He said, still, he can't see why I'd still be breaking out at age 34. I told him that I had severe anxiety, insomnia and constipation that I was doing my best to handle *** all which contribute to acne, if you have any of these symptoms, as well***

I think if everyone on this site got the doctors that failed them together and put them on a desert island, we'd have no more doctors.

However- he did agree with my herbologist that makeup causes chronic cases of acne.

Being a woman- hormones, our unique life changes and pressures, and the societal pressure to wear makeup- is the reason acne is more prevalent with middle to upper class women.

If you get to reading on this site, it may be overwhelming, but you'll find patterns that might resonate with your situation. And lots and lots of support. Like they say in AA, "keep coming back."

Good luck

Thanks for all your help. You're right! But I feel like i'm researching excessively at the moment. The minute I get in through the door I take my makeup off, wash my face, use my toner and moisturiser and then put my isotrexin on. It's so sad but the whole time i'm in work I just keep thinking about how I can't wait to get home. Acne is consuming my life again. I don't have any of the symptoms you've mentioned above except constipation sometimes. I also get some bloating, all of which has also got worse in the last few weeks as well.

I'm 31 and was in the middle of starting a new career but decided to put that on hold because of acne and depression. This site has helped me feel like I'm not alone in this even though it seems it sometimes. I'm becoming more and more confident that I will get through this.. and I already am. Its a tough battle but hopefully you can find ways to give yourself credit for doing your best, thats most important. Hope you find some answers soon. Good luck!

Thank you, i'm glad it's not just me postponing my career, social life etc because of this stupid thing!

I have a question for all of you in the UK: I was actually very recently referred to a dermatologist 4 weeks ago for a completely different skin condition. It will be months before I get the appt but shall I just go to it and talk about my acne as well? Would the derm be happy to prescribe me accutane even though I was referred for a different condition?

I'm having another down day today. I popped the two "super zits" I had because they'd had whiteheads for days and I couldn't bare the pain of them on my face anymore. Even when they start to flatten out i've still got these hundreds and hundreds of tiny spots under my skin ready to erupt. Does anyone have these? What are they called? I've googled some pictures...

http://dermatology.netfirms.com/mdderma/skinImages/acneComedones.jpg

http://www.dermatopedia.com/wp-content/themes/dermatopedia/dermimages/7355_acne2.jpg

I guess they are kind of like blackheads but there doesn't seem to be a head anywhere. They aren't squeezable.

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You definitely have room to make diet changes. Try cutting out dairy and gluten for 3 months - if you're feeling adventurous, you could look into paleo. You're not alone - trust me

Hugs from NY

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I suffered from Acne too, from Years 7 to 12 and school. I was bullied for this purely because I was 'blessed' with acne. After I took roaccutane I've been left with acne scars and when I had acne scars I also had crooked teeth. I decided to treat my acne but not my teeth in fear that treating my acne it would too much to handle. This resulted in me being left with both crooked teeth and acne scars and when I was left with 'friends' at university I was subjected to the abuse 'Ugly happyflowers' and has resulted me at both at university and at home being crippled with confidence. At university people said ' Thats too harsh' to the ugly happyflowers comments, and this in itself made me more aware of such comments. I now have no confidence in myself but am too 'proud' to go to anyone for help I genuinely don't now what to do, I've never felt low. I don't know how people can be so cruel towards me, I'd never judge a person on a trait that can't be changed.

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have you tried any masks? I've had reaaaallllly horrible ance twice in my life.. 17-18 and this year at 21. right now im mostly scars and pigmenation spots.. i cleared up in about a month ( i seriously had 30+ pimples on my face) with aczone and tazorac and using an oatmeal mask every couple days since my skins oily.

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Feel like I'm in the exact situation as you right now. I'm 24 and have been suffering from acne for at least 10-11 years now. Went on accutane when I was 19, it worked pretty damn good for a year or so after that. My skin for the last 2-3 yrs can usually be covered pretty good with makeup but I keep breaking out with bad cysts now which is always on my my chin/jawline area and around my mouth. It's so bad right now and I start a new job on Monday. I've tried just about every pill and topical treatment that's been prescribed to me and I'm sick of having to deal with this everyday. Idk what the hell to do anymore but it's super depressing as an adult now when you have a full time job and need to interact with people on a daily basis. I know what you mean when you have to skip out on plans with people because of your skin. This suckssss. Needed to rant so thanks! It helps to know that I'm not alone because every time I look at my friends, I don't get why I'm the only one who has to deal with this. So frustrating! Just hope we all figure out a way to better our skin :)

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I feel your pain. I am 47 and have had this issue my entire adult life. I am finally making some headway and wanted to share it with you. If you been on birth control pills and/or antibiotics, your gut flora is unbalanced. Take a good quality probiotic (I like Bio-kult) and then the bad bacteria in your digestive tract will be outnumbered by the good guys. I am a big fan of dr. mercola's e-newsletters and he says that grains cause acne in a lot of people, You may be one of them. I am now on a no-grain diet and my skin is improving. No wheat, rice, potatoes, starches. This will also heal your gut. You will have to stay on this diet for 6 months to a year to get better. Google gaps diet or specific carbohydrate diet and see what it is all about. You can get better but you got to eliminate the foods that are causing your inflammation.

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