I have my consultation on a different clinic inside my town. You know my problem is actually scars that bother me day and night. However, I am also still breaking out. And I want to control my acne. I tried to be confident to go into crowd as the clinic is full of its customers. In that clinic, I didn't see anyone who has severe scars like mine, so it made me so down. I feel like I just scared people there. When a new customer is registering, usually the cs will take photograph for the data. But it was being different when me, no cs took a photo of me. I should be happy but I felt so odd, I do not like to be captured to be honest. But then I wondered why and I had to know it. Then, I was bothered by women that actually made a distance to sit near me. When all the seats are mostly full, a girl sitting beside me then after she saw empty seat she moved. And in the consultation room, a doctor asked me why I didn't take any medication over my acne. I was just shocked. I wonder Why the hell he concluded that without asking me first. Then I clarified, NO, you are WRONG. I have been on medication by various of dermatologists. He asked again, are you serious? So Why won't the acne go away? You must pick your acne so often mustn't you? I think I had many acne scars than the acne. He then said, but I do see you still have many acne as well. "Don't pick your acne..." These words I often heard from so many people. But no matter what I did, acne often left me pitted scars. Then after that I go to the cashier. When I sit on the seat, there was a girl who were going to sit the seat near me. But she moved her seat and change the position to be opposited me. Then I was just venting in my mind, "I know I am disgusting. I know you won't be my boy friend. But you should know I don't want to be your girlfriend either, get lost and find a handsome boy, Shallow Girl. I'd rather to be alone!"
Oh man, my face is prone to acne. I do not think I have irritated my skin as hell. I have several medication on different dermatologists and the result acne is still there. It's difficult to tell what exactly the cause of my acne when people ask me why I have acne. All I can say it's genetics. The fact that I have sensitive skin and easily breaks out. People who know little or experiencing few acne in their life never understand how I can't control my acne. Just like you that saying I might irritating my skin so I have acne. I have been using gentle facial wash and some creams to prevent acne from a well-known clinic in my town. But it's just hard as hell to be free of acne. Didn't you just read the title of my post, sorry to make you confused because I wrote some other points above. Basically, my point is people and even doctor are difficult to believe that I have already cared about my acne. But the fact that I can't control my acne, thus makes people think negatively what I have done to my face and supposed I am a kinda person who just do not care of my face. Do you know how I feel if someone treated you like what happened to me? It hurts like a hell.
Oh man, my face is prone to acne. I do not think I have irritated my skin as hell. I have several medication on different dermatologists and the result acne is still there. It's difficult to tell what exactly the cause of my acne when people ask me why I have acne. All I can say it's genetics. The fact that I have sensitive skin and easily breaks out. People who know little or experiencing few acne in their life never understand how I can't control my acne. Just like you that saying I might irritating my skin so I have acne. I have been using gentle facial wash and some creams to prevent acne from a well-known clinic in my town. But it's just hard as hell to be free of acne. Didn't you just read the title of my post, sorry to make you confused because I wrote some other points above. Basically, my point is people and even doctor are difficult to believe that I have already cared about my acne. But the fact that I can't control my acne, thus makes people think negatively what I have done to my face and supposed I am a kinda person who just do not care of my face. Do you know how I feel if someone treated you like what happened to me? It hurts like a hell.
Ignore idiots like the above. The point of your post is to vent your feelings, concerns, emotions so that you are not living with them on your shoulder, angry at the world for your problems. By this hopefully you do not follow in the recent footsteps of the many who randomly pull out a gun and end other peoples lives because you feel like it. So, thank you for your post and never apologize for venting, that is of course unless you personally attack someone than shame on you.
It really matters not in this stage for either you or I to argue acne as genetics, lifestyle, environmental, chance, fate, etc etc. Its a disorder that affects many more than you can imagine. Sadly for men its more noticeable because we cant cover it up with makeup..well you can, but someone finding out wear make up where i live is worse than coming to work on your worst breakout day ever.
I think personally you are over analyzing the details of your clinic ordeal. While you maybe right in your assumptions you cannot affirm the motivations and intentions of the clinic secretary or people in the waiting room. The cs was just trying imo not to make it worse or put you on the spot. People in the waiting room do as they please so do not look into that. The doc... is well the doc. Some suck at talking to patients and others are truly the nicest people you ever meet. I've had the experience of meeting both extremes of that spectrum on a professional level. The guy sounds like he wasn't very good, but again i wasn't there. If he didn't believe you then you stand up for yourself, appropriately, and nicely. Remember you are paying him so make him work for you. If what he says is not true then politely correct him; show him what you have done and the results. The fact is we are not the same, some scar more easily without any input from ourselves and others never do it seems.
You need to keep a log i feel by identifying atleast some of a culprit to what is causing your acne. This could be a food diary, activity diary, and activities or things you have or havent done like change bedding weekly cause sometimes its that easy... Its the little things that help. I feel you need to identify what type of acne you are most prevalent to. Me is the nodular kind, and the occasional cyst which are not the same... a cyst is infected or contamined while a nodule is noninflammed (yet), but is a blocked pore that forms vesicle filled with interstitial fluid, maybe blood. I get these often days after i shave. My solution to keep these under control is proper shaving etiquette, clean utensils, minimize irritation, and removing cleaners, BP, and SA products out of my regimen. BP caused too much dryness, leading to more oil, redness, delayed healing, and pih. While SA caused me to develop many, multiple noninflammed clogged pores-it gave me an entirely different type of acne i usually never got, ever. A long time ago i was prescribed epidou and then differin. But didn't use it because of more acne i caused and the dryness...ugh, but what i failed to understand is that i needed to keep using it inorder to get a handle on my type of acne which starts deeper in the skin and causes extensive scaring. So, finally after realizing this years later, i am treating myself regularly with tretinoin (stronger than differin was for me) for these purposes. Its been close to 10 years of trying to figure it out though. So, my suggestion for you is to try to do the same because for one i want to help,and this is what i know.
The scarring.. its an entirely different chapter. I would research derma stamping and application of either vitamin C or copper peptides. I am using a copper peptide serum over vitamin C because it oxidizes quickly, is ridiculously expensive if you buy it from a skincare company, is an acid and can cause burns therefore if made by yourself must be diluted correctly. And it also caused me to have blackheads when i used it.
I am not at this expecting to be cured, but i am hoping to lessen the effects. But like you do not care or try to be overly obsessed. Day by day thats all you can do.
scars over face , are extreme punishment on soul and mind !! , but we have now so many treatments that can improve scars till degree that can make us happy but money is always the problem !! , so after years of pain like you i know now one thing , if you want to be happy and back to life again , collect as much money as you can and do your search for best treatments and doctors , i wish best for you
I have my consultation on a different clinic inside my town. You know my problem is actually scars that bother me day and night. However, I am also still breaking out. And I want to control my acne. I tried to be confident to go into crowd as the clinic is full of its customers. In that clinic, I didn't see anyone who has severe scars like mine, so it made me so down. I feel like I just scared people there. When a new customer is registering, usually the cs will take photograph for the data. But it was being different when me, no cs took a photo of me. I should be happy but I felt so odd, I do not like to be captured to be honest. But then I wondered why and I had to know it. Then, I was bothered by women that actually made a distance to sit near me. When all the seats are mostly full, a girl sitting beside me then after she saw empty seat she moved. And in the consultation room, a doctor asked me why I didn't take any medication over my acne. I was just shocked. I wonder Why the hell he concluded that without asking me first. Then I clarified, NO, you are WRONG. I have been on medication by various of dermatologists. He asked again, are you serious? So Why won't the acne go away? You must pick your acne so often mustn't you? I think I had many acne scars than the acne. He then said, but I do see you still have many acne as well. "Don't pick your acne..." These words I often heard from so many people. But no matter what I did, acne often left me pitted scars. Then after that I go to the cashier. When I sit on the seat, there was a girl who were going to sit the seat near me. But she moved her seat and change the position to be opposited me. Then I was just venting in my mind, "I know I am disgusting. I know you won't be my boy friend. But you should know I don't want to be your girlfriend either, get lost and find a handsome boy, Shallow Girl. I'd rather to be alone!"
OMG....THIS IS MY STORY!!!
I too have been to many dermas and all say i pick my acne...but i do not pick, please stop pointing that out people....one doctor even implied that i am "mentally unstable" and so i put all my anger out by picking my acne and don't remember it later, so insulting....i guess my acne scars are because of some blood impurity or so...cause other basic skin problems like wounds, scratch or even mosquito bites leave marks on my body....btw fuck all those shallow people..you are better than them...consider yourself lucky if there are even a few people who love you amongst the millions who are just douchebag...
I left one dermatologist's office where the PA said to me condescendingly, "The best medications in the world won't fix it if you keep picking at it." Excuse me? This was a female physician's assistant, so you can't rely on gender for sympathy.
My personal opinion is that human beings are just naturally inclined to scratch and pick at things that don't belong on their skin. At the time I was 30 years old, and I had no time for physicians who take my money and patronize me at the same time.
I don't know what to say about people reacting strangely to you in the office. Don't let their ignorance keep you from getting the healthcare you need. Seriously, if you're there to get help, you're in the right place.
One way you might be able to make dermatologist visits more successful is by making sure they get your old records. Don't be afraid to call the old doctor's office first and see how you can transfer your records. They might make you fill out a form and sign it-- just make sure you have your new doctor's offices phone/fax/address/name of physician spelled correctly. Hopefully they will not charge you for the records if you have them transferred to a new doctor. If you're under 18 (sorry if you're not, but I just thought I'd mention it in case you are) you might just need a parent/guardian to sign. Most front office staff could care less if you transfer out, so don't expect them to be shocked or give you a hard time.
While going to one dermatologist in a different state, who turned out to be excellent, I made sure I wrote down every treatment I had ever taken (especially antibiotics that stopped working, topicals that irritated me, etc) in time-line fashion. As a result, he didn't bother pushing medications on me that I knew didn't work. If the physician sees that you've tried tetracycline three times in the past, for example, he/she is probably less likely to try it on you again.
I am also frank with my current dermatologist. I tell him flat out, "I tend to pick at things, although I don't pick when there's nothing to pick at". At least that way, he knows I am aware that some acne of mine appears worse from my own bad habits. I'm not suggesting that you do pick incessantly, but if you do, find a doctor who still treats you like an adult when you tell them so. My current one doesn't seem phased when I tell them this. Why should dermatologists be, anyway, if we help them make money?
You might want to mention that your skin tends to scar regardless of picking, or be emphatic if acne tends to run in your family.. "My elder brother and sister both had cystic acne, both were on Accutane at one point, both have scarring," etc...
Take charge of your treatment, be your own best advocate. The doctors know you can take your business elsewhere, so don't let them bully you, no matter what your age is.
I too get asked ALL THE TIME if my scars are from me picking. It's beyond insulting that people would even ask me that and only makes me feel worse in bad lighting wondering if people are judging me (I'm sure they are). As if acne scars aren't bad enough, being told it's my fault for having them is beyond upsetting, no matter how many times I try to explain myself
I've scarred from every pimple the last three years and I never picked. I've only ever popped blackheads which didn't scar.