Hi all,

It's been a while since I posted on here but thought i'd not only update on my situation but I also have a few questions and would love some other's perspectives or experiences.

In October 2012, I was signed off form my job in recruitment for a few weeks with anxiety and depression and it was around this time that my acne got particularly bad, and has been bad ever since. I ended up handing in my notice and giving up the job altogether. I moved home for a bit and left my flat in Birmingham, then moved back just after Christmas planning to get a new job. I went for interviews and was offered a couple of jobs ..still in recruitment. I did one day of a new job and the anxiety overcame me so I left, saw my GP and she ended up signing me off work altogether and sending me to CBT.

It was around this time that my rent was up in a couple of months so myself and my other half decided we were going to move to Worcester (where he works) and start new! So we did. We moved in May and I got offered another job in recruitment which again I couldn't start. I then thought about teaching and to cut a really long story short, I took a job as Learning Mentor in a secondary school. When I came to start, the anxiety about my skin was uncontrollable (see my previous post!). I was constantly overcome with anxiety and scratching away at my face in the mirror but no matter how hard it got I still stayed and battled through.

My skin is still crazy bad. My acne is bright red, under the skin lumps, with no head and my picking ..whilst it's better ..when I have something to pick at, i'll pick at it. I end up with open red sores all over my face. My anxiety is pretty much under control and my skin picking it so much better than it was, thanks to hypnotherapy ..but it's the fact i'm still getting the acne that I can't stand.

I have tried everything when it comes to treatments for my skin. I've tried 4 lots of antibiotics, numerous creams, red and blue light therapy, chemical skin peels, I even have brought a home blue-light machine which really hasn't done much! I have been to see my GP around 10 times in the last 3 months because of my skin and he FINALLY referred me to a dermatologist, saying that Roaccutane is going to be the next thing to try as nothing else seems to be working.

I also decided to book a private derm appointment as well as wait for my NHS one as I wanted the drug SO much. I've done a hell of a lot of research on it and the side effects don't even remotely scare me as my want for clear skin seems to have become an innate need more than anything else! Does that even make sense?!

I went to my private derm on Monday (25th November) and he has put me on 30mg of Roaccutane. The consultation fee itself was 100 and the prescription was 52 ..so I am still going to go to my NHS appointment on Monday, to see if they can give me a cheaper prescription and also to get their opinion.

So far, I have been on this drug since Monday night at 30mg ..haven't noticed anything in terms of benefits yet, but I haven't seen or felt any side effects either, not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing??

I've read a lot that Roaccutane is a last resort and i'm terrified that even if I give this drug 6 months, it's still not going to work.

I want to be able to have clear skin, be confident in people looking at my face, being close up when talking to me etc.. and not feel really paranoid that they are staring and examining me.

I guess i'm asking if anyone has any success stories from this? Tips of hanging on in there and being patient or just wise words to make me feel less anxious about my skin! I know it's a tough task and a big thing to ask ..It's good just knowing there are other people too who understand what it is to have bad skin and the hell it brings!

Thanks,

Kerxo X