Notifications
Clear all

Looking At Your Skin Really Close

 
MemberMember
8
(@spartan32)

Posted : 07/22/2013 7:35 pm

For the past few years, I have used what my skin looks like 2 inches from the mirror as a measuring stick. What I have seen and still see are many scarred pores, a few boxcar scars, some icepicks, and some hyperpigmentation. When I look at it from a foot and a half or 2 away from the mirror, it actually looks pretty damm good. The problem is in my head, I feel like everyone still gets the few inches view that makes my skin look really bad.

Does anyone else scrutinize their face really close up like that?

Quote
MemberMember
0
(@meheh)

Posted : 07/22/2013 7:36 pm

Oh yeah. All the time. I try and just wash my face and get the hell out, but then I start looking at all the little blackheads and bumps. I prefer terribly lit bathrooms for this reason.

Quote
MemberMember
8
(@spartan32)

Posted : 07/22/2013 7:50 pm

Oh yeah. All the time. I try and just wash my face and get the hell out, but then I start looking at all the little blackheads and bumps. I prefer terribly lit bathrooms for this reason.

I usually try and do that and get out as soon as possible. I realize that not looking at my face at all eases my anxiety a ton.

Quote
MemberMember
1
(@carambola)

Posted : 07/22/2013 8:55 pm

I try not to because I have trouble leaving things alone, and that's how I used to end up squeezing everything and turning mere blackheads into large, painful zits. I don't even turn the bathroom light on.

My skin has seemed to age very rapidly and obviously in the past couple of years, but people somehow occasionally still think I might be a minor (I'm 28), so that reminds me that others probably don't see everything I do. I know I have some degree of acne scarring, too, but my mom has commented on how my skin "isn't even all scarred up."

Quote
MemberMember
2
(@umaid619)

Posted : 07/22/2013 9:26 pm

yea sometimes makes it look so much worse...partly because I only focus on the scars/blackheads and not the entire face, probably why it makes it look a lot worse then it actually is, i tend not do it as often, as i'm also very picky, so whatever i see i don't like i will definitely mess with it...

Quote
MemberMember
8
(@spartan32)

Posted : 07/23/2013 12:23 am

My thinking is so distorted these days. In my mind, I feel like every person that I come in contact with just goes straight to analyzing my skin, looking for pimples, scars, and redmarks and after taking inventory of it all, will finally notice the rest of my face. In reality, this couldn't be farther than the truth but why does it feel like its true?

Quote
MemberMember
1
(@thefearlessface)

Posted : 07/23/2013 12:55 am

I do it too but I've gotten a lot better. It's totally psychological- it's not about the skin at all. I used to pick a lot and I had to look at why I was doing it. Because I wanted great skin, and I saw each clogged pore as an obstacle getting in my way of that achievement. So if I got it out, I would have clear skin, right? Wrong. Of course it makes it worse. So much of the acne I've experienced in my life has been self inflicted. If I go camping or am in a situation where I can't pick or squeeze, my skin improves greatly. You've got to love and accept yourself as you are, including all the little imperfections and flaws that you may see. Nobody is perfect.

Dimly lit bathrooms help too. :)

Quote
MemberMember
5
(@elliew8)

Posted : 07/31/2013 5:33 am

ah I do this all the time...feel like mirrors should have a WARNING WARNING alarm if I get too close to them because it's just not the reality that everyone else sees. Compacts are the worst though, I always look in the magnified side and feel depressed, but even when I flip it onto the normal zoom mirror I still zero in on the little stuff :( I've actually taken the bulb out of the light above my bathroom mirror and it's really broken the habitual side of picking for me...I'll still pick in other mirrors from time to time but it's not such a daily routine now

Quote
MemberMember
3
(@tban0117)

Posted : 07/31/2013 2:48 pm

Totally me! It's a trip how I can't look at myself in the mirror up close anymore. Actually if there's a bright light anywhere near a mirror I can't look at myself. I hate that but it's a security blanket my mind has made me do to feel better about my skin. I use my phone screen (in dimmed lights) as my mirror everyday to apply my makeup. I can see clearly but I still feel like a freak for doing that. In all honesty though, until my "on and off 6 years and struggling" battle with acne continues, I think this is best. Otherwise I see every cloged pore, every zit/pimple/pustule, every tiny scar... I begin to #1 pick very thing until I'm satisfied it's cleaned up, then #2 I sometimes will get a panic attack thinking how damaged I think my skin looks.

Long story short, I avoid mirrors in lighting because I don't want to make things worse. We're not alone guys. Hopefully one day this bullshit ends and we can have our lives back.

Quote
MemberMember
4
(@kevindreed)

Posted : 08/03/2013 11:28 am

I have that but not that I don't have pimples scars don't mean anything to me.

Use this regimen 2 pumps of bp and 2 pumps of cetaphil moisturizer mixed with 30 drops of jojoba oil. Use CVS oilpads to wipe away shine. Your breakouts will stop immediately and within 2 weeks all existing pimples will be gone.

Quote
MemberMember
2481
(@wishclean)

Posted : 08/07/2013 11:40 pm

Yep I do it all the time unfortunately. I try not to because it gets me down. I sincerely hope other people don't scrutinize every inch of my face like I do, but sometimes I get really self-conscious when people stare and it makes me feel like I'm under a magnifying glass. What messes with my head are those dimly lit bathrooms in restaurants that make everyone's complexion look flawless... but then again, harsh lighting isn't realistic either.

Quote
MemberMember
86
(@bodie81)

Posted : 08/08/2013 12:15 am

I have done this in the past and would spend hour upon hour examining myself from inches away in the mirror. The problem with doing that is that you see yourself in a totally unrealistic light and every flaw or blemish is magnified tenfold. No one else sees you like that or studies you to that degree.

I still get the urge to look in the mirror frequently but recently I`ve tried to limit the occasions that I look in the mirror to 3-5 times per day maximum. It does help.

Quote
MemberMember
58
(@snsdgirl14)

Posted : 08/08/2013 12:41 am

I do this a lot...I look up close at my pores especially, because I have somewhat big pores. I get so grossed out at my skin and everything I see. But then when I look at from it a normal distance, it looks good, so...

It's really all psychological. Everyday people are never that close to your face.

Quote
MemberMember
0
(@missmysterious)

Posted : 08/08/2013 12:45 am

All the time. I feel like the more I look at my skin, the worse it looks to me. My bathroom lighting is horrible. Brighter than day. Every flaw is noticeable. Then there's a dimmer light I can just have on. Which I prefer much more...

Quote
MemberMember
12
(@goodz19)

Posted : 08/08/2013 10:04 am

Im screwed in the bathroom. The lighting is incredibly bright, even tho I changed the wattage to a lower bulb. Every teeney tiny thing is noticeable to me. I see every clogged pore, every blackhead, every broken capillary, every scar, not to mention the acne that is visible even from a normal distance.

So then I turn off the bright light and am left with only the light that goes on w/ my shower exhaust fan and that light is so dim, it shows every divot, every scar, every bump. Its a horrible situation. But i cant seem to get myself outta there to ease my anxiety.

Currently, Im a physchological mess because of this.

Quote
MemberMember
0
(@moodymoody)

Posted : 08/08/2013 12:42 pm

I always do it, always scrutinize my skin in the mirror all the time, it makes me feel better to check my skin hour to hourr. So I know what changed with,,

But for a long term, I feel that this behavior wasn't right.

Sometimes I think am I going crazy bout acnes even????(LOL~ but its dam* truee!it really happening,, Feel ashamed bout it ~)

Then I start to reducing my time with mirror to avoid a stupidd tickle feelin bout "being crazy" :D,, and it gets better now,a little. However I realized that i should 'wake up', really, its not Good.........

Quote
MemberMember
3
(@lynn8808)

Posted : 08/08/2013 12:49 pm

I have't dared to go less then a foot away from the mirror in a VERY long time. Nor do I allow anyone else to. I don't even like to kiss people now.

Quote
MemberMember
7
(@rosalie324)

Posted : 08/09/2013 9:36 pm

The scrutinizing definitely gets the better of me as well. I hate how everything looks 1000x bigger when you're about three inches from the mirror. I also find that I focus on the spots on my face that I know are "broken out" or scarred. Therefore I'm not getting an accurate picture of what my face actually looks like. It's such a mind trip. I usually avoid mirrors/reflective surfaces at all costs. I don't even turn on the lights in the bathroom, except when I'm applying my zit cream in the morning and night. Whenever I see my reflection it usually triggers an anxiety attack :( Unfortunately the anxiety doesn't really stay away regardless of whether I see my reflection or not.

I have't dared to go less then a foot away from the mirror in a VERY long time. Nor do I allow anyone else to. I don't even like to kiss people now.

Quote
MemberMember
67
(@user174136)

Posted : 08/12/2013 4:45 pm

I used to look in magnifying mirrors at least 10 times a day. Caused stress and picking.

Hide the mirrors unless absolutely necessary people. No good ever came of staring at one's own face for too long.

Quote
MemberMember
7
(@rosalie324)

Posted : 08/13/2013 3:40 pm

I used to look in magnifying mirrors at least 10 times a day. Caused stress and picking.

Hide the mirrors unless absolutely necessary people. No good ever came of staring at one's own face for too long.

Amen!

Quote
MemberMember
115
(@moonlitriver)

Posted : 08/13/2013 3:51 pm

I'm always scruitinising my skin close up in the mirror and every bit of my skin just looks sooooo bad at that distance! Mirrors and reflective surfaces in general seem to be like a kind of addiction for me I just can't seem to stop myself checking them all the time. Like if I'm out and walking along the street I have to keep checking how bad my face looks in car and shop windows every few paces, I must look so superficial and self-obsessed! Thing is I'm not, I absolutely hate what I see in the mirror, I'm just checking that I still look tolerably human enough to be out in public. Prettiness doesn't come into it at all, I'm just trying to achieve fundamental humanity!

I wish I could do as some of you guys do and just not ever look in mirrors at all. Problem is I'd never leave the house if I did that, although to be fair I've been barely doing that at all as it is. Also at the risk of sounding completely crazy here, does anyone else get their face changing in strange ways in the mirror when they look at it for too long? Obviously I'm imagining it but it always really freaks me out so I was wondering if anyone else had experienced this. Ok I'm done with this totally bizarre post now, so apologies to everyone if it actually makes no sense whatsoever!

Quote
MemberMember
86
(@bodie81)

Posted : 08/13/2013 4:56 pm

I'm always scruitinising my skin close up in the mirror and every bit of my skin just looks sooooo bad at that distance! Mirrors and reflective surfaces in general seem to be like a kind of addiction for me I just can't seem to stop myself checking them all the time. Like if I'm out and walking along the street I have to keep checking how bad my face looks in car and shop windows every few paces, I must look so superficial and self-obsessed! Thing is I'm not, I absolutely hate what I see in the mirror, I'm just checking that I still look tolerably human enough to be out in public. Prettiness doesn't come into it at all, I'm just trying to achieve fundamental humanity!

I wish I could do as some of you guys do and just not ever look in mirrors at all. Problem is I'd never leave the house if I did that, although to be fair I've been barely doing that at all as it is. Also at the risk of sounding completely crazy here, does anyone else get their face changing in strange ways in the mirror when they look at it for too long? Obviously I'm imagining it but it always really freaks me out so I was wondering if anyone else had experienced this. Ok I'm done with this totally bizarre post now, so apologies to everyone if it actually makes no sense whatsoever!

Moonlit, I`ve done the car and shop window thing too. On more than one occasion, I`ve gone to look at my reflection in a car window only to find that there is someone sat in the car! Talk about embarassing! Worse than that though, in my local Sainsbury`s there is a sunglasses stand and every time I used to shop in there, I would pretend to look at the sunglasses just so that I could look at myself in the mirror at the top of the stand. Can`t believe I`m telling you guys this - you will probably think I`m completely mad.

Thinking back, the main reason that I would constantly look in mirrors and reflective surfaces would be to seek reassurance that my blemishes (real or perceved) did not look too bad. The problem was that 95% of the time, every time I looked at my reflection, my flaws would look more hideous and repulsive - I suppose this would be similar to what you experience when you look in the mirror for too long.

CBT has really helped with the mirror checking. It was one of the first things I discussed when I started CBT and with the help of my therapist I managed to cut down the times I look in the mirror to three times per day - first thing in the morning when I wash and shave, when I get home from work and last thing at night. At first it was really hard not only to resist the compulsion to look in the mirror but also the anxiety that was provoked by not being able to see if there were any blemishes on my face. However, by strictly adhering to the alloted times that I can look in the mirror, over the course of the past few weeks it has helped me to focus less on and feel less anxious about my appearance.

Edit: Just off to have my nightly wash so that I can get my mirror fix!

Quote
MemberMember
7
(@rosalie324)

Posted : 08/13/2013 5:13 pm

I'm always scruitinising my skin close up in the mirror and every bit of my skin just looks sooooo bad at that distance! Mirrors and reflective surfaces in general seem to be like a kind of addiction for me I just can't seem to stop myself checking them all the time. Like if I'm out and walking along the street I have to keep checking how bad my face looks in car and shop windows every few paces, I must look so superficial and self-obsessed! Thing is I'm not, I absolutely hate what I see in the mirror, I'm just checking that I still look tolerably human enough to be out in public. Prettiness doesn't come into it at all, I'm just trying to achieve fundamental humanity!

I wish I could do as some of you guys do and just not ever look in mirrors at all. Problem is I'd never leave the house if I did that, although to be fair I've been barely doing that at all as it is. Also at the risk of sounding completely crazy here, does anyone else get their face changing in strange ways in the mirror when they look at it for too long? Obviously I'm imagining it but it always really freaks me out so I was wondering if anyone else had experienced this. Ok I'm done with this totally bizarre post now, so apologies to everyone if it actually makes no sense whatsoever!

Moonlit, I`ve done the car and shop window thing too. On more than one occasion, I`ve gone to look at my reflection in a car window only to find that there is someone sat in the car! Talk about embarassing! Worse than that though, in my local Sainsbury`s there is a sunglasses stand and every time I used to shop in there, I would pretend to look at the sunglasses just so that I could look at myself in the mirror at the top of the stand. Can`t believe I`m telling you guys this - you will probably think I`m completely mad.

Thinking back, the main reason that I would constantly look in mirrors and reflective surfaces would be to seek reassurance that my blemishes (real or perceved) did not look too bad. The problem was that 95% of the time, every time I looked at my reflection, my flaws would look more hideous and repulsive - I suppose this would be similar to what you experience when you look in the mirror for too long.

CBT has really helped with the mirror checking. It was one of the first things I discussed when I started CBT and with the help of my therapist I managed to cut down the times I look in the mirror to three times per day - first thing in the morning when I wash and shave, when I get home from work and last thing at night. At first it was really hard not only to resist the compulsion to look in the mirror but also the anxiety that was provoked by not being able to see if there were any blemishes on my face. However, by strictly adhering to the alloted times that I can look in the mirror, over the course of the past few weeks it has helped me to focus less on and feel less anxious about my appearance.

Edit: Just off to have my nightly wash so that I can get my mirror fix!

It's interesting how people with the same difficulties can have such total opposite behavior. LIke how I completely avoid mirrors and reflective surfaces at all costs, except for my morning and nightly regimens. I feel every time I look in the mirror, something on my face looks worse or worse than that, something new has appeared. It's gotten to the point where I need my mother to apply my make-up and 9/10 I leave the house wearing a hat to cover my forehead. I swear I would wear a shawl over my face if I didn't run the risk of looking completely mad.

Moonlit, I can totally relate to your mirror experiences. If I stare long enough, everything starts to look bigger, or redder, or even I can find imaginary bumps all over my face. It's completely insane. Sometimes when I look too long I start losing touch with what I actually look like. Almost as if it's not me in the mirror. All I can see are the bumps, the scars, and red/dark marks that cover my T-Zone. Ergo, I COMPLETELY avoid mirrors even though not knowing what I look like provokes intense anxiety.

Something that I have recently started doing, right before I fall asleep, is to state the things that I am blessed with. First I'll start with superficial things like "I'm blessed to have clear cheeks" and "I'm blessed to have no active pimples right now". Then I move into things with more substance like "I'm blessed to have a boyfriend that has loved with clear skin, with broken out skin, and with acne covered skin" and "I'm blessed to have a roof over my head, while there are people sleeping on benches". I find that it temporarily eases the anxiety and helps me go to sleep feeling blessed, even though I may be struggling to no end. Because in the end (even though I may not believe it), I can logically state that I am blessed with more positive than negative. If I can believe that statement for 5 minutes out of the day, then that's enough for now.

Quote
MemberMember
115
(@moonlitriver)

Posted : 08/13/2013 6:32 pm

Moonlit, I`ve done the car and shop window thing too. On more than one occasion, I`ve gone to look at my reflection in a car window only to find that there is someone sat in the car! Talk about embarassing! Worse than that though, in my local Sainsbury`s there is a sunglasses stand and every time I used to shop in there, I would pretend to look at the sunglasses just so that I could look at myself in the mirror at the top of the stand. Can`t believe I`m telling you guys this - you will probably think I`m completely mad.

Thinking back, the main reason that I would constantly look in mirrors and reflective surfaces would be to seek reassurance that my blemishes (real or perceved) did not look too bad. The problem was that 95% of the time, every time I looked at my reflection, my flaws would look more hideous and repulsive - I suppose this would be similar to what you experience when you look in the mirror for too long.

CBT has really helped with the mirror checking. It was one of the first things I discussed when I started CBT and with the help of my therapist I managed to cut down the times I look in the mirror to three times per day - first thing in the morning when I wash and shave, when I get home from work and last thing at night. At first it was really hard not only to resist the compulsion to look in the mirror but also the anxiety that was provoked by not being able to see if there were any blemishes on my face. However, by strictly adhering to the alloted times that I can look in the mirror, over the course of the past few weeks it has helped me to focus less on and feel less anxious about my appearance.

Edit: Just off to have my nightly wash so that I can get my mirror fix!

Thanks GUNNKE, it's so good to know I'm not the only person who's ever engaged in this ludicrous habit! I always get paranoid that there'll be someone in the car one day but thankfully it hasn't happened yet. If it ever does I think I may just die of embarrassment! I can totally relate to the sunglasses thing. Anything in a shop that's reflective is just another temptation for me. It's pretty pathetic.

It's great that you've now managed to ration your mirror checking. I try so hard to do the same and I can sort of manage to get it down to about 5 times a day when I'm staying at home but if I'm leaving the house I literally cannot stop myself from doing it constantly to check my make-up's covering the acne well enough and that I haven't somehow reverted to looking like a monster again. I'm also obsessive enough that I have to check my skin in at least 3 different mirrors in my house to check how it looks in different lighting before I'll actually go out the front door. It's totally ridiculous, I really need to gain some self-control and willpower!!

It's interesting how people with the same difficulties can have such total opposite behavior. LIke how I completely avoid mirrors and reflective surfaces at all costs, except for my morning and nightly regimens. I feel every time I look in the mirror, something on my face looks worse or worse than that, something new has appeared. It's gotten to the point where I need my mother to apply my make-up and 9/10 I leave the house wearing a hat to cover my forehead. I swear I would wear a shawl over my face if I didn't run the risk of looking completely mad.

Moonlit, I can totally relate to your mirror experiences. If I stare long enough, everything starts to look bigger, or redder, or even I can find imaginary bumps all over my face. It's completely insane. Sometimes when I look too long I start losing touch with what I actually look like. Almost as if it's not me in the mirror. All I can see are the bumps, the scars, and red/dark marks that cover my T-Zone. Ergo, I COMPLETELY avoid mirrors even though not knowing what I look like provokes intense anxiety.

Something that I have recently started doing, right before I fall asleep, is to state the things that I am blessed with. First I'll start with superficial things like "I'm blessed to have clear cheeks" and "I'm blessed to have no active pimples right now". Then I move into things with more substance like "I'm blessed to have a boyfriend that has loved with clear skin, with broken out skin, and with acne covered skin" and "I'm blessed to have a roof over my head, while there are people sleeping on benches". I find that it temporarily eases the anxiety and helps me go to sleep feeling blessed, even though I may be struggling to no end. Because in the end (even though I may not believe it), I can logically state that I am blessed with more positive than negative. If I can believe that statement for 5 minutes out of the day, then that's enough for now.

That is interesting that you've had completely the opposite reaction! Although I must say I would definitely never be able trust my mum (or anyone else for that matter) to do my make-up for me! I totally get the shawl temptation. I had to go to the doctor's with no make-up on a few weeks ago (literally the first time in 8 years that I've stepped foot outside my house bare-faced) and even though my dad drove me to the door of the surgery I still had to wear a scarf to cover my face up from the eyes down... in July no less!! I know I must have looked like a complete weirdo but to me it was the lesser of two evils if the other option was anyone seeing my horrific skin.

Counting your blessings before falling asleep sounds like a really good idea but I don't know how well I'd be able to do it. I really struggle with any kind of positive thinking and the hours it takes for me to get to sleep each night are always filled with billions of negative thoughts flying around in my head, some of them so bad that they feel like being physically kicked in the stomach (and yes I am aware that sounds completely insane...). But I will definitely try your technique! As you say, even thinking positive for 5 minutes each day would be significant progress! :)

Quote
MemberMember
86
(@bodie81)

Posted : 08/13/2013 11:36 pm

It does take a lot of willpower and I do relapse from time to time but as a lot of the destructive thoughts and beliefs I have about myself often eminate from what I see when I look in the mirror, it has definitely helped reducing the mirror checking.

Totally understand why you would check in the mirror more before going out. I definitely feel the urge to check in the mirror more before going out. In my case, I am looking for reassurance that I look okay to reduce the anxiety that I feel over my spots and blemishes (real and perceived). Very often though, checking in the mirror more doesn`t give you that reassurance - it just reinforces the thought that you look repulsive, hideous and ugly and makes you even more anxious about going out. I`ve lost count of the times that I have stayed in and cancelled or called into work sick because I`ve felt so disgusted by what I see in the mirror.

I have a portable shaving mirror that I would move from room to room so that I could check my appearance in different lighting. Very often, I would scrutinise my appearance in my living room which is south facing and has the brightest daylight/sunlight. Naturally, this would show every single blemish or flaw in full, glorious technicolor! I now make sure that I only use this mirror in the bathroom where the lighting (real and artificial) is more forgiving.

Mirrors have been my nemesis for many years. It`s an ongoing battle but I think I`m finally winning.:)

Thanks GUNNKE, it's so good to know I'm not the only person who's ever engaged in this ludicrous habit! I always get paranoid that there'll be someone in the car one day but thankfully it hasn't happened yet. If it ever does I think I may just die of embarrassment! I can totally relate to the sunglasses thing. Anything in a shop that's reflective is just another temptation for me. It's pretty pathetic.

It's great that you've now managed to ration your mirror checking. I try so hard to do the same and I can sort of manage to get it down to about 5 times a day when I'm staying at home but if I'm leaving the house I literally cannot stop myself from doing it constantly to check my make-up's covering the acne well enough and that I haven't somehow reverted to looking like a monster again. I'm also obsessive enough that I have to check my skin in at least 3 different mirrors in my house to check how it looks in different lighting before I'll actually go out the front door. It's totally ridiculous, I really need to gain some self-control and willpower!!

Quote