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What Do You Think Of This?

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(@dreamergirl)

Posted : 06/25/2013 10:12 pm

http://forums.soompi.com/discussion/268852/does-bad-skin-affect-your-beauty/p1

I was quite shocked at people's responses... :/

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467
(@nicmic62)

Posted : 06/25/2013 10:18 pm

Goes to show how most people see beauty as something on the surface. It goes beyond the skin in my opinion.

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(@ansia)

Posted : 06/25/2013 11:17 pm

 

People who don't suffer from acne or skin problems have no idea how hard it is to look yourself in the mirror and think that you're beautiful.

They take their skin for granted.

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108
(@randall-flagg)

Posted : 06/25/2013 11:26 pm

Kind of a frustrating read. Seems like there are some people on there who are understanding and think that acne doesn't detract from overall attractiveness, and then others are just blatantly like "it matters, it detracts from beauty." Ugh.

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122
(@ayeaye)

Posted : 06/25/2013 11:53 pm

Those types of posts are so subjective. You could ask the same question about anything and everything. Can someone still be attractive if they have rotten teeth, if someone is fat, if someone is balding etc etc. The answer to those questions will depend on the person who is answering don't you think? As an example, if I go out with a girlfriend to the pub and we play the dreadfully mature game of "who would you sleep with if you had to sleep with someone in here", you could pretty much guarantee that if there was a bald guy with a shaved head in there, I would pick him, but my friend wouldn't find him attractive if he was the last man on earth.

The same could be said about acne. Some people can ignore it and others can't. Its all personal and there is no wrong or right as far as I'm concerned. Its all about personal taste. Would I find a guy attractive who had acne? Of course, but so long as he's also bald ;)

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19
(@quietjamie14)

Posted : 06/26/2013 2:20 am

I wasn't particularly surprised by the responses. (The one about acne being acceptable for teenagers but disgusting on a 24-year-old hurt a bit; I'm 28 and still suffering).

What bothers me (and continues to baffle me) more is the admiration that people have for so-called 'beautiful people'. Appearance is not an achievement!

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122
(@ayeaye)

Posted : 06/26/2013 2:23 am

Appearance is not an achievement!

Beautifully said.....

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33
(@user146096)

Posted : 06/26/2013 4:24 am

 

This is what I've been saying. We frequent a board, saturated with sufferers with similar issues, there's an understanding between us. Great. NOW explore the internet (It's not even exploration, because it's pretty easy to find) and you'll find that people will very openly say "Acne makes you ugly" and that's me altering the words. If only you knew what people really thought of us... (search the internet if you're brave and thick skinned).

It's quite funny as there's a pattern though. If the question is asked by an acne suffer, people hide behind cliches "as long as you're confident", "Beauty is from within". But if the question is asked by a non acne-sufferer where there is no reason to take pity on the poster, or even try to empathize with those that do suffer, they speak their minds, often with a knee-jerk response. A knee-jerk response is a lot more valuable to me than a well planned out, deep, "I am enlightened" response, which is all too often bullshit. It almost reminds me of people who ask if they're ugly and people have the nerve to tell them that confidence will solve all their problems. This is the truth and though it may be a hard pill to swallow, it's a truth that I've come to accept.

Exhibit A "The vultures"- http://www.fluther.com/54115/why-do-we-consider-acne-unattractive/

"If a guy with acne walks up to me and asks me out on a date - no - I would not". Not even a chance.

Another one - "Acne.Is.Ugly.

I dont like it.All you would have to do is just take care of your face or use some product that clears it off.I dont like it but dating somebody with it wont stop me from liking them because a lot of people get it.I have smooth skin which is good and I wash my face every day and night so I dont usually get acne." It's dangerous to be this stupid.

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23
(@perseverance92)

Posted : 06/26/2013 7:17 am

 

There's no point in discussing it.When you say acne affects your "Beauty" ,what do you mean by it? YES, acne does affect your beauty when you're talking about physical beauty.There's absolutely NO doubt about it and it's just time waste if you keep discussing it.Stop looking at logical questions from an emotional point of view.Use your head.

But NO,acne doesn't affects your over all beauty.By over all beauty i mean your physical beauty and your personality.Your personality far outweighs your physical beauty when it comes to influencing your sum total of "beauty".

So the conclusion is that acne does bring you a few notches down on the scale of physical beauty,but if you have a beautiful personality to compensate for it then in the end your "sum total of beauty" wouldn't be affected. :)

 

I wasn't particularly surprised by the responses. (The one about acne being acceptable for teenagers but disgusting on a 24-year-old hurt a bit; I'm 28 and still suffering).

What bothers me (and continues to baffle me) more is the admiration that people have for so-called 'beautiful people'. Appearance is not an achievement!

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58
(@snsdgirl14)

Posted : 06/26/2013 7:30 am

It isn't surprising in my opinion. There's no doubt about it - acne is not an attractive feature. It never was, never will be. BUT, I think the way many people (including myself) feel is that acne does NOT make a person unattractive, even if the acne itself isn't an attractive trait. It's just an imperfection, which everyone has. The same goes for other things - a big nose, frizzy hair, etc. Are these things considered unattractive? Yes, they usually are, but they don't make a person ugly. A person's overall attractiveness depends on many features, including their facial symmetry, bone structure, body type, etc. It's not defined solely by skin.

I've been attracted to many guys who definitely did not have perfect skin. Sure, they probably would be even more attractive if they had perfect skin. But the fact that they don't didn't make me not attracted to them. (this is just me, but I liked them even more for it cause I could relate to them)

It's all subjective, though, as someone said earlier. Some people can look past it and don't care--others cannot. The most frustrating thing is when people think acne can be cured simply by washing your face more. Literally the dumbest thing ever. People don't get that most acne sufferers probably take care of their skin better than anyone - it's all just genetics and hormones.

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23
(@perseverance92)

Posted : 06/26/2013 8:12 am

It isn't surprising in my opinion. There's no doubt about it - acne is not an attractive feature. It never was, never will be. BUT, I think the way many people (including myself) feel is that acne does NOT make a person unattractive, even if the acne itself isn't an attractive trait. It's just an imperfection, which everyone has. The same goes for other things - a big nose, frizzy hair, etc. Are these things considered unattractive? Yes, they usually are, but they don't make a person ugly. A person's overall attractiveness depends on many features, including their facial symmetry, bone structure, body type, etc. It's not defined solely by skin.

I've been attracted to many guys who definitely did not have perfect skin. Sure, they probably would be even more attractive if they had perfect skin. But the fact that they don't didn't make me not attracted to them. (this is just me, but I liked them even more for it cause I could relate to them)

It's all subjective, though, as someone said earlier. Some people can look past it and don't care--others cannot. The most frustrating thing is when people think acne can be cured simply by washing your face more. Literally the dumbest thing ever. People don't get that most acne sufferers probably take care of their skin better than anyone - it's all just genetics and hormones.

I boil when people tell me to wash my face more.I agree with you it's DUMBBBBBBBBBBBBBB. When ignorant people advocate cures for acne,i feel like hitting them.lol ... Their callousness is unpardonable.

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(@stella-the-diver)

Posted : 06/26/2013 12:30 pm

Some people can be so harsh and it made me kind of mad and sad that a lot of the responses glorified clear skin as opposed to acne.

I always have this debate in my head about beauty and acne.It's true that everybody's not perfect physical-wise. We all have imperfections, but I've always wondered whether acne was at the bottom of the " imperfections list", like the one of the worst ones of the bunch...? :/ Yeah, acne in itself is not considered beautiful, like I find it really hard to imagine someone having an acne fetish or saying something like "My god, your cysts are looking cute today." , that'd be out of the ordinary...but anyway, I don't think acne makes a person less beautiful, they can have a great smile, nice lips, eyes, etc. that can outshine the skin's condition, no? I've seen some pretty damn good looking folk with severe acne on here!

But, then again it's all a matter of personal taste, and since I'm suffering from acne/scars, I'm biased, sympathize and see more in people than their acne...I wonder how would my opinion be if I've always had clear skin.

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271
(@dejaclairevoyant)

Posted : 06/26/2013 12:33 pm

I wasn't particularly surprised by the responses. (The one about acne being acceptable for teenagers but disgusting on a 24-year-old hurt a bit; I'm 28 and still suffering).

What bothers me (and continues to baffle me) more is the admiration that people have for so-called 'beautiful people'. Appearance is not an achievement!

I guarantee a very young person said that... I was just talking about this yesterday. Young people have this thing where they think 25-30+ year olds are "old" as in...their parents. I'm 30+ and I quite often get from young people "Wow, you don't look that old!" What they never seem to get is that NO 30 year olds look "that old"...people in their 30s aren't that different from people in their 20s physically. Some look older if they become parents, change their hairstyle, or just try to seem older etc. But in reality, a 24-year old with acne isn't going to look any different than a 17-year old with acne and I bet the person who said that comment would just assume the 24-year old was a teenager if they saw them.

As for the thread, I didn't think there was anything wrong with most of the responses but I only read to page 2. I think it's obvious that acne detracts from physical beauty--that should go without saying.

Appearance is not an achievement!

Hmmm I have to disagree there. Looking a certain way often takes hard work. Makeup, skin care, hair extensions, styling, clothes shopping... I definitely think it is an achievement.

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10
(@mandarine)

Posted : 06/26/2013 1:00 pm

I do not understand.

I mean, every time this is war on my face, people tell me "The white of your white heads pimples fits you very well today", and "The red marks on your cheek matches your lipstick".

"My god, your cysts are looking cute today.": I laughed so hard when I read that, thank you.

Not a frustrating read, for me. People who do not have acne just cannot imagine how hard it is to wake up every morning wondering how will a mirror affect your mood.

For them, it is just something ugly, easily erasable "washing our face more", like it was said here.

I guess most people see pimples as imperfections, just like sticking-out ears or big nose, whereas acne make us feel like a big fat pimple, walking on the street, making us forget the gorgeous person we are.

That is why, I think, some people can say: "If a guy with acne walks up to me and asks me out on a date - no - I would not".

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(@frankl)

Posted : 06/26/2013 8:18 pm

the responses are actually pretty nice. were you expecting people to say that acne makes people beautiful? if acne wasn't a big deal this website wouldn't exist and we wouldn't bother posting here because our lives would be awesome.

i still say people with good facial aesthetics shouldn't worry too much about acne like most people on that website were saying. op is a pretty girl and every person i see on here posting their pics are good looking even with acne. you guys are so lucky.

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9
(@celloislove)

Posted : 06/26/2013 10:04 pm

 

Everyone is going to have an opinion. I got married when I still had moderate acne, so I guess someone thought I wasn't hideous.

 

 

Everyone is going to have an opinion. I got married when I still had moderate acne, so I guess someone thought I wasn't hideous.

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271
(@dejaclairevoyant)

Posted : 06/27/2013 2:13 pm

Everyone is going to have an opinion. I got married when I still had moderate acne, so I guess someone thought I wasn't hideous.

 

Everyone is going to have an opinion. I got married when I still had moderate acne, so I guess someone thought I wasn't hideous.

Of course you weren't hideous. We're talking about PHYSICAL beauty only, Acne has an affect on physical beauty, but physical beauty is maybe 10 percent of overall beauty. If a person has a great personality and is wonderful to be around, it can be such an overpowering energy than people around them won't even notice the acne.I'm sure you were gorgeous on your wedding day. :)

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1
(@scarface123)

Posted : 06/27/2013 6:30 pm

Everybody looks physical beauty first. If you're not just a bit attractive, how can you show another person that you have superb "inner" beauty? You can't because you never get a chance. People will judge you whenever you go. I'm in my late 19s, so I can tell you that this period of time is the worst. Girls are looking just for super models aka "David Backham" types, will ignore everyone who is different. If you don't have the looks you have nothing. Acne is unatractive. You sure have to have a loooot of luck to find someone who will understand you, who will accept you. I fear that I won't be that lucky guy. Never was, never been. sad.png

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(@snsdgirl14)

Posted : 06/27/2013 11:44 pm

Everybody looks physical beauty first. If you're not just a bit attractive, how can you show another person that you have superb "inner" beauty? You can't because you never get a chance. People will judge you whenever you go. I'm in my late 19s, so I can tell you that this period of time is the worst. Girls are looking just for super models aka "David Backham" types, will ignore everyone who is different. If you don't have the looks you have nothing. Acne is unatractive. You sure have to have a loooot of luck to find someone who will understand you, who will accept you. I fear that I won't be that lucky guy. Never was, never been. sad.png

I can assure you that the majority of girls are not looking for David Beckham types. Physical attraction is a factor in establishing relationships, but attraction is so subjective. Personally, I have been attracted to many guys with acne. And I know many people that would be able to look past acne in a relationship. Some people just don't care that much. And once you get to know them for their personality, they truly become beautiful in your eyes.

It's all about finding the people that are worth it. The ones that aren't are the shallow ones that you wouldn't want a relationship with anyway. But personally, I have been able to look past other guys' acne and not mind it at all. In fact, I'd rather my boyfriend have not flawless skin, because then I won't feel as self conscious around him and I can relate.

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18
(@omnivium)

Posted : 06/30/2013 3:08 am

Honestly acne does make you look less attractive. That's why we are here. To find out how to get rid of or deal with our acne because we don't like how it looks. It depends on how bad the acne is though. It's not as simple as "Someone has acne, so I will reject them." There is this girl with moderate acne who works at my gym, and I think she is really pretty. Her acne doesn't bother me at all. But if she had severe acne, I admit it would be a bit of a turn off. I sympathize with people who have acne, but it does make you look less physically attractive.

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23
(@perseverance92)

Posted : 06/30/2013 4:33 am

Everybody looks physical beauty first. If you're not just a bit attractive, how can you show another person that you have superb "inner" beauty? You can't because you never get a chance. People will judge you whenever you go. I'm in my late 19s, so I can tell you that this period of time is the worst. Girls are looking just for super models aka "David Backham" types, will ignore everyone who is different. If you don't have the looks you have nothing. Acne is unatractive. You sure have to have a loooot of luck to find someone who will understand you, who will accept you. I fear that I won't be that lucky guy. Never was, never been. sad.png

I can assure you that the majority of girls are not looking for David Beckham types. Physical attraction is a factor in establishing relationships, but attraction is so subjective. Personally, I have been attracted to many guys with acne. And I know many people that would be able to look past acne in a relationship. Some people just don't care that much. And once you get to know them for their personality, they truly become beautiful in your eyes.

It's all about finding the people that are worth it. The ones that aren't are the shallow ones that you wouldn't want a relationship with anyway. But personally, I have been able to look past other guys' acne and not mind it at all. In fact, I'd rather my boyfriend have not flawless skin, because then I won't feel as self conscious around him and I can relate.

I wish girls like you were there in my college smile.png

Everybody looks physical beauty first. If you're not just a bit attractive, how can you show another person that you have superb "inner" beauty? You can't because you never get a chance. People will judge you whenever you go. I'm in my late 19s, so I can tell you that this period of time is the worst. Girls are looking just for super models aka "David Backham" types, will ignore everyone who is different. If you don't have the looks you have nothing. Acne is unatractive. You sure have to have a loooot of luck to find someone who will understand you, who will accept you. I fear that I won't be that lucky guy. Never was, never been. sad.png

I'll tell you something.Though i believe and i know it for a fact that acne DOES make you less attractive whether you're a male or a female(after all if that wasn't the case then wouldn't this place cease to exist?) but relationships have more to it than just physical attraction.I have this friend who is the absolute opposite of what you'll call attractive .He has moderate acne,he is obese and despite that he eats obscenely unhealthy things.He is not your sophisticated metro-sexual guy who is very keen on grooming himself.But even then he has a beautiful girl.Before they got in that relationship i had a mad crush on that same girl.I wrote poetry for her (yes i'm cheesy sometimes).It took me 3 damn weeks to write that piece of rhyming ****.And it wasn't that bad.She messaged me "The poetry is nice but we cannot be more than friends". I was in depression an entire week.Why? Because my friend had charmed her.He's a womanizer.A philandering womanizer .He knows how to make a girl laugh,how to make her cry,how to make her grunt !.

His plus points are that he is very good in academics.He has a high i.q ,a high e.q and he is street smart.He can emotionally manipulate almost every girl on Earth.So what's the lesson? Let us both work on the aforementioned skills and then we shall have some game wink.png .

P.S I'm not really interested in "Game".I'm the one woman guy. "Fall in love with a princess.Make her your queen". I believe in that.

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6
(@mrnegative)

Posted : 07/02/2013 6:22 pm

I wasn't particularly surprised by the responses. (The one about acne being acceptable for teenagers but disgusting on a 24-year-old hurt a bit; I'm 28 and still suffering).

What bothers me (and continues to baffle me) more is the admiration that people have for so-called 'beautiful people'. Appearance is not an achievement!

Appearance could definitely be an achievement. Good genetics and a clear complexion are not an achievement, but there are lots of other things that go into appearance. You could hit the gym every single day and build a killer body. That's an achievement that's also aesthetically pleasing.

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2481
(@wishclean)

Posted : 07/04/2013 6:21 pm

Have you noticed that most people who posted on that forum use themselves as an example? They generalize their response based on how they feel about themselves - it's all relative. I think deep down they are mostly referring to how they see themselves than how they see other people. In any case, I wouldn't want to be friends with most of them.

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