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The Last Resort For Me - Accutane Didn't Work Out! The Story Of My Life!

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1
(@scarface123)

Posted : 06/21/2013 7:48 am

Hello everybody!

I decided to write a story of my life with acne so far. I've copy/pasted much of the content from my older post from the other section of this forum, because nobody answered me, nobody gave me some support there, so please excuse me if you've already read this. I would really appreciate some help because I'm all stressed out, I'm really frustrated at the moment.

I'm currently on my 2nd course of accutane(the first one was 4 years ago and it was successful) and my problem is that it doesn't work for me anymore. I remember that when I had my first treatment with accutane I started seeing results more quickly than now. More importanly - it helped me for the first time but it doesn't help me more! sad.png During present course the effect of the drug was seen after 3 months but then something happent. I can't believe it but during the 3rd month of my treatment I started breaking out. At first glance it was only an innocent pustule but then a big buble full of puss grew out of it. I also have 3-4 HUGE red marks around it and it is still spreading. Perhaps it is a foliculitis, but it's darn deep. I have other chin full of some very persistent acne. It can be seen that I will have a lot of deep scars because of this. And believe it or not, this actually happent DURING the treatment of the accutane (before the treatment that area of my skin was CLEAR and now it isn't!). brow.gif UNBELIVEABLE! However, this isn't the worst thing. The worst thing my face stopped improving in month 3 and started to break out, when it's supposed to be getting better! It's not moving anywhere! It's not getting better with me, it's only getting worse. This Accutane isn't a miracle drug!

I'm currently starting month 5 and my face is practically worse than it was when I started accutane. I can't believe it, I don't wanna believe it, but it is. I'm 19 years old and i weigh 74 kg/163 pounds and I'm 183 cm/ 6 feet tall and I'm taking 40 mg accutane per day(2x20 mg, one in the morning and one in the evening). I will be taking it for 2 months more, but I think that my skin can't improve much in such short period of time. Skin improvement usually requires months, even year to repair its damage. I've read other threads when you guys are writing that I have to be patient but that's bullshit. The dermatologist said that my body is reacting differently now than it had 4 years ago, but this is only an excuse. It should be just a little bit better now, but it ain't. I'm currently on month 5 and I'm worse than I was before, come on, how about that? I want to be clear! I'm doing everything to keep my face clean. Every topic and cream I bought, nothing helped me. I tried almost everything from benzoyl peroxyde, doxy, Skinoren, Klimicin, nothing, Really NOTHING helped me! Because obviously it can't because I have Acne Conglobata which is somehow curable only by Accutane (See the jinxed circle? I'm in a jinxed circle). sad.png

I'm suffering acne for 5 years and I'm sick of it. I want it to be gone. I'm really depressed about the fact that Accutane is so effective, but it doesn't help me. How can I be one amongst 10 % of people that Accutane doesn't help. HOW, please someone tell me? I'm crying now that I'm writing this to you and I feel very sad.

I'm so frustrated, everything makes me so outrageous. I lost everythinking because of these acne. A lot of good things. I can't stand how people look at me, how I'm disgunsting to them, how they judge me just because of my appearance. I can't stand it anymore. I'm 19 years old and I never had a girlfriend because I'm so ugly. Everybody are just running away from me because I'm so unatractive. They're not giving me the opportunity to show them that I'm in fact a good person. Despite losing 10 kg and training football and going to the gym I'm still unatractive and not handsome (because of my constituon of bones). I trained hard to get such body as I have now, but that doesn't make any sense, because my face is awful. In my country girls are looking just by the looks (most of girls do that).sad.png

I'll tell you a short story about one of many girl humulitation that I have done through my single, pathetic little life. I was waiting for the bus at the bus stop with some students which were the same age as me. We were standing around 12-15 metres away and they didn't know that I could hear them. There were a girl and a guy talking to each other. "Look, isn't this one handsome?",he said sarcastically and laughed pointing the finger to me. She turned her face towards me and said: "Yuck, I wouldn't have him even if you offered me 100 000 000 $" and laughed. This really hurt me to the bottom of my heart and I'm still recalling this memory every single day. It hunts me.

In addition of everything written above my acne is uncontrollable, I start breaking out when I'm put under a lot of stress, my acne is called Acne Conglobata (the interesting fact is that I'm the only in my whole family that have such acne, nobody before me had such problems), the worst of all acne disease and if Accutane won't help me then what will? Accutane is the only remedy that can help me, but it doesn't. I mean, come on I'm on month 5 and I'm getting worse from day to day. This is unreal!

If you're reading this, please write something, I would really appreciate some help.

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0
(@maxwell247)

Posted : 06/21/2013 8:34 am

I feel for you man, I'm 19 also. Acne is completely running my life right now, I never thought it would come to this point. I've literally hidden away in my room for months eating strict plant based diets, but to not satisfactory results. I've even covered my mirrors with pieces of clothing, just because I know that acne is sitting on my face. My plan is to keep eating healthy and experiment with foods, hopefully I clear up soon. You should check into your diet man; plenty of fresh vegetables and some fruits! Good luck, hold tight.

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1
(@scarface123)

Posted : 06/21/2013 8:45 am

The diet is not fault for my problems, I eat a lot of fruit and vegetables, so this is not a problem. I also tried to starve my body to death, so I was on a border of anorehcya but it turned out that the diet is not fault for my skin problems.

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7
(@andrewbleah)

Posted : 06/21/2013 8:58 am

At your weight , I would go up to 80mg a day.For your acne type this is the best dose.Talk to your dermatologist about raiseing your dose ,then give in another 2 months and the result will pay off.Trust me I had the worse acne on this board(accutane made my acne so much worse)I know it sucks but you'll get there bud.Raise ur dose and WAIT.Is all you can do.take care

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1
(@scarface123)

Posted : 06/21/2013 9:43 am

At your weight , I would go up to 80mg a day.For your acne type this is the best dose.Talk to your dermatologist about raiseing your dose ,then give in another 2 months and the result will pay off.Trust me I had the worse acne on this board(accutane made my acne so much worse)I know it sucks but you'll get there bud.Raise ur dose and WAIT.Is all you can do.take care

Yeah, I know, I have 2 months to go and then we'll see what my dermatologist will say. I'm a bit worried of the side effects which may be even worse than now if I take bigger dose. I have quite severe side effects(I'm more tired, nosebleeding, dry lips, itching, red marks on the skin, even depression as you can notice). I'm scared that these side effects may even worsen.

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6
(@miss-soloist)

Posted : 06/21/2013 10:57 am

At your weight , I would go up to 80mg a day.For your acne type this is the best dose.Talk to your dermatologist about raiseing your dose ,then give in another 2 months and the result will pay off.Trust me I had the worse acne on this board(accutane made my acne so much worse)I know it sucks but you'll get there bud.Raise ur dose and WAIT.Is all you can do.take care

Yeah, I know, I have 2 months to go and then we'll see what my dermatologist will say. I'm a bit worried of the side effects which may be even worse than now if I take bigger dose. I have quite severe side effects(I'm more tired, nosebleeding, dry lips, itching, red marks on the skin, even depression as you can notice). I'm scared that these side effects may even worsen.

Don't be too scared those side effects aren't severe at all but the common ones. You just have to try not to get too anxious over it. The liklihood is it's the persistent acne that is making you more depressed rather than the drug. I suffered with severe suicidal depression right before I took accutane but it was fine. In fact when my skin started to show improvment the depression went too.

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MemberMember
1
(@scarface123)

Posted : 06/21/2013 12:08 pm

At your weight , I would go up to 80mg a day.For your acne type this is the best dose.Talk to your dermatologist about raiseing your dose ,then give in another 2 months and the result will pay off.Trust me I had the worse acne on this board(accutane made my acne so much worse)I know it sucks but you'll get there bud.Raise ur dose and WAIT.Is all you can do.take care

Yeah, I know, I have 2 months to go and then we'll see what my dermatologist will say. I'm a bit worried of the side effects which may be even worse than now if I take bigger dose. I have quite severe side effects(I'm more tired, nosebleeding, dry lips, itching, red marks on the skin, even depression as you can notice). I'm scared that these side effects may even worsen.

Don't be too scared those side effects aren't severe at all but the common ones. You just have to try not to get too anxious over it. The liklihood is it's the persistent acne that is making you more depressed rather than the drug. I suffered with severe suicidal depression right before I took accutane but it was fine. In fact when my skin started to show improvement the depression went too.

Yes, but I'm already on accutane for four months, starting the fifth one and I still haven't noticed the difference since I started the course. That's very strange because almost everybody noticed the difference on that time. It seems that I'll have to go to the higher dose. I'm having my next dermatologist appointment in the beginning of July.

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(@darkheart)

Posted : 06/21/2013 1:12 pm

Acne Conglobata is sometimes resistant to Accutane. Nobody knows what causes it for sure, but it is thought to come from a defective gene. Don't listen to these people telling you to clean up your diet and eat more fresh fruit andd veggies, they have no clue what they're talking about. A healthy diet helps a bit but it won't cure something as severe as Acne Conglobata.

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1
(@scarface123)

Posted : 06/21/2013 3:16 pm

Acne Conglobata is sometimes resistant to Accutane. Nobody knows what causes it for sure, but it is thought to come from a defective gene. Don't listen to these people telling you to clean up your diet and eat more fresh fruit andd veggies, they have no clue what they're talking about. A healthy diet helps a bit but it won't cure something as severe as Acne Conglobata.

I'm worried about the word sometimes. What does that mean? That I'll have to repeat Accutane all over again for my whole life or what? That I'll have to repeat the course? Will it be more successful next time? It is well known that Accutane(Isotretinoin) is the only known cure for Acne Conglobata. If it doesn't help me, then what will? I'm running short on options here.

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(@miss-soloist)

Posted : 06/21/2013 7:41 pm

It sounds like you need a higher dose of accutane to me, usually with acne congbalata they prescribe prednisone alongside it too to help.

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5
(@darkheart)

Posted : 06/21/2013 11:34 pm

Acne Conglobata is sometimes resistant to Accutane. Nobody knows what causes it for sure, but it is thought to come from a defective gene. Don't listen to these people telling you to clean up your diet and eat more fresh fruit andd veggies, they have no clue what they're talking about. A healthy diet helps a bit but it won't cure something as severe as Acne Conglobata.

I'm worried about the word sometimes. What does that mean? That I'll have to repeat Accutane all over again for my whole life or what? That I'll have to repeat the course? Will it be more successful next time? It is well known that Accutane(Isotretinoin) is the only known cure for Acne Conglobata. If it doesn't help me, then what will? I'm running short on options here.

It takes a lot to control Acne Conglobata, yes you may need several courses of accutane (maximum of 3) as well as Prednisone.

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1
(@scarface123)

Posted : 06/22/2013 7:14 am

Acne Conglobata is sometimes resistant to Accutane. Nobody knows what causes it for sure, but it is thought to come from a defective gene. Don't listen to these people telling you to clean up your diet and eat more fresh fruit andd veggies, they have no clue what they're talking about. A healthy diet helps a bit but it won't cure something as severe as Acne Conglobata.

I'm worried about the word sometimes. What does that mean? That I'll have to repeat Accutane all over again for my whole life or what? That I'll have to repeat the course? Will it be more successful next time? It is well known that Accutane(Isotretinoin) is the only known cure for Acne Conglobata. If it doesn't help me, then what will? I'm running short on options here.

It takes a lot to control Acne Conglobata, yes you may need several courses of accutane (maximum of 3) as well as Prednisone.

It sounds like you need a higher dose of accutane to me, usually with acne congbalata they prescribe prednisone alongside it too to help.

But Prednisone has even more severe side effects as Accutane. I don't think I could handle both of them. It would ruin my whole immune system and my body IMO.

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1
(@jennyband)

Posted : 06/22/2013 7:51 am

i took prednisone with my second course of accutane, it was a great help to relieve the cysts. give it a go if your dr will give it to you. the side effects aren't too bad in small doses.

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5
(@darkheart)

Posted : 06/22/2013 11:57 am

Acne Conglobata is sometimes resistant to Accutane. Nobody knows what causes it for sure, but it is thought to come from a defective gene. Don't listen to these people telling you to clean up your diet and eat more fresh fruit andd veggies, they have no clue what they're talking about. A healthy diet helps a bit but it won't cure something as severe as Acne Conglobata.

I'm worried about the word sometimes. What does that mean? That I'll have to repeat Accutane all over again for my whole life or what? That I'll have to repeat the course? Will it be more successful next time? It is well known that Accutane(Isotretinoin) is the only known cure for Acne Conglobata. If it doesn't help me, then what will? I'm running short on options here.

It takes a lot to control Acne Conglobata, yes you may need several courses of accutane (maximum of 3) as well as Prednisone.

>It sounds like you need a higher dose of accutane to me, usually with acne congbalata they prescribe prednisone alongside it too to help.

But Prednisone has even more severe side effects as Accutane. I don't think I could handle both of them. It would ruin my whole immune system and my body IMO.

Oh no, only in the long term. Prednisone on the short term has few side effects and works wonderful to bring down inflammation in the body. The drug saved my life, in 2011 I developed a severe strain of Pneumonia and literally could not breathe at all until being given Prednisone and within 6 days I was over the worst of the symptoms and my breathing had normalized. The drug is amazing.

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(@coolusername)

Posted : 06/23/2013 2:51 am

  1. You are 19, so acne or no acne, it's a great time to try things. Do the things that you like to do. Also, you can totally have friends and girlsfriends. And once you succeed, you will know what it's like to have a girlfriend and you might say "This is easier than I thought".
  2. I think that if you show the effort to be confident, have good posture, and have good eye contact, other people who may not have warmed up to you will see your strong character. For people who have acne, I would say it's better to err on the side of too much eye contact than too little. The fact that you are making a long eye contact tells other people that they can make eye contact with you in return without any worries.
  3. Have eye contact with everyone for a good few seconds. Make sure that you yourself can see that the other person is making eye contact with you for good few seconds. I think that acne has made me divert my eye contact too quickly than I realized. I think I may have looked at another place if someone else tried to make eye contact with me on the street or public places. Also, I may have blinked when the person tried to make eye contact with me. And then I think I looked sideways. However, if I kept looking at the person's eyes for good few seconds, I would be sure that I made nice eye contact if I can see that their eyes have locked with my eyes for good seconds.
  4. Since you may not be used to making a long eye contact, it's good to be the initiator of eye contact. You be the first look at the person and the eyes and make eye contact for good few seconds. And you will get better with practice and your brain will adapt.
  5. Rule of Thumb is that you look at people and other items for 3-5 seconds approximately. You can practice with looking at a door knob at your home for 3 seconds. And with this practice, I realized that it's much more interesting and easier to look at a person's eyes for good few seconds. Think of it this way, people's eyes are so easy to make eye contact with. Eyes were made perfect for making eye contact. Don't ever think that you looking at people's eyes is making them feel uncomfortable or something, you are making effort and that is all that matters.
  6. I think it would a good thing if you enter a room or classroom to look around the room with confidence. At least not walking with the head down when entering a room.
  7. This could be helpful. You could think of your character as the kid who has acne but is confident and has a strong character. Strong character as in you make effort to be confident and make eye contact.
  8. There are many, many, girls in this world. Lol
  9. Helpful way of thinking of the situation of hanging out with girls is to do things as if she is already your girlfriend. The way you look at her, you think of her as your girlfriend already. The way you touch her, you think of her as your girlfriend already. That is an extremely helpful way of looking at it. If you keep persisting with that mindset, that will help you so much. And you gotta talk to a girl for longer than you think to build attraction. Some girl who you may not thought as attractive might be attractive after you talk with them for some time. If she seems nervous, do not think that it's because of the acne that you have. Many people who don't have acne find a meeting between a man and a woman slightly nervous at the least.
  10. Do not think negatively of yourself. I believe it's ok if you don't think of some grand positive qualities of yourself right away. What is not okay is talking negatively of yourself. Don't do bad things idea.
  11. Speaking of insecurities, not thinking of insecurities for a long time helps you so much. For example, so many times, I've looked at my wrist and thought that my wrist is too skinny for a guy. I would have this thought so many times throughout the day. This is not a good effect on you at all. So, doing what you can about what you can work on (you can not even have the word insecurities in your vocabulary. You can think of them as things I can work on and not as I have this and that insecurity). Do what you can about the things you can work on, and plow through the rest of the day.
  12. I think the most important thing to work on if you want to be better with people is eye contact. And putting in effort when you talk or do things with people. If some people seem a little nervous around you, that is okay, you are putting in effort. If some people seem to act a little differently when you talk to them, that is okay, you are putting in effort. They will respect that and thank you for it.
  13. You are 19, get out there pal hehe
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