So let me just say that this is the cause of me not having any friends and never having a girlfriend or even a girl friend to talk to. Also the cause of me not being able to go to a derm even or get a job or have trouble leaving the house. My face has always had horrible red acne scarring and nodules. It's like deep reddish burgundy nodules which stands out A LOT from my normal pale skin. This is how it is currently (worst spot):
On top of that, I have always been a perfectionist for some reason (I think it's genetic). Anyway, you can imagine a perfectionist with acne is not a good combo.
Basically, whenever I talk to anybody I cannot be my full creative self because I'm scared someone is going to use my acne against me, either as a joke or as an insult. It's like this psychological mental block and I cannot even think straight and I say what I don't want to say because I cannot be "me" with acne.
Like before I used to joke around and not care what I said (basically had confidence) and now whenever someone is talking my mind drifts to the lighting, my positioning, how bad my acne is, and I basically block the other person out or just nod or agree with fake expression and emotion. It's not me anymore. I'm boring to be around now because I never say or think what I am actually thinking, I just say fake stuff so I don't draw attention to myself or my acne.
Is there anything I can do? I know this will only go away once my acne goes away, but I'm hoping that maybe there's some kind of pills that help. Any help is appreciated, thanks a lot.
I understand your pain and frustration, but for this type of acne and your psychological issues, you should go to a derm. I know it will be hard at first because of your skin, but once a derm sees your skin at its worst then he/she can prescribe the right treatment. After you get the right treatment, then your acne will start to go away and your confidence will increase. The first step is always the hardest, but nothing worthwhile in this world comes easy. Good luck to you and I hope everything turns out well for you.
ugh, i totally relate to this post!!! gosh, its like you read my mind haha.
I have the same set of psychological issues, and I know this because when I do miraculously have a clear day, I feel like my real self is being set free for once, and I become this COMPLETELY different person. Thats how I know that acne puts me in a mental fog. And, like you, I worry about lighting, and cant keep a straight conversation because instead of focusing on what they're saying, I think, "OMG they are looking at my skin. They probably hate me/think im ugly. I shouldnt be out in public. pity party, etc."
I personally went on accutane, I dont know if you are seeing a derm that could start helping you. But in your case, I would highly recommend getting on some kind of anti-depressant combined with acne treatments so that you can attack the physical and the emotional at once. You got this!!! hang in there.
I can def. relate, when I was suffering from acne earlier this year I felt the same way. I HATED being in certain lighting because I knew it made my acne look bad. I would spend like an hour in front of the mirror in my room just staring at my face. I would even dream about having a clear face! It was awful. All my friends basically have perfect skin too so I just felt jealous and horrible about my condition.
People really are not criticising you as much as you think. Before I even had acne, I would basically not even notice if another person had acne. If it was particuarly bad I might notice but I wouldn't judge them for it or be grossed out by it. So many people have acne that it's like a common thing to see nowadays. People won't treat you like a social recluse...you just have to get out there and try and see that people aren't pitying you, judging you etc. Hell, people are so self centered, they usually are only thinking about themselves and their own problems anyway!
I would recommend seeing a therapist to talk to about your feelings. It will help a LOT, trust me. I would also recommend looking into anti depressants, they can help a lot too.
Finally, I would HIGHLY recommend seeing a derm. If you are feeling this horrible about your acne, take action. It feels better to know you're fighting it rather than just letting it happen. I saw a derm and could not be happier that I did - I have a clear face now. And you might be eligible for Accutane, which can get rid of your acne forever. So don't worry, brighter days are ahead of you! Just know this will not last forever!
.......yep go see a Derm..... for me that was also my first step coz i was already fed up with how i look like........... and then i still was depressed, isolating myself..never wanting to go out of the house, scared to even go to a family gathering always, never ending thinking about what they might say about my acne.............so finally.... went to a psychiatrist and she confirmed that i'm clinically depressed + bipolar II.
...... so now ACNE+ Bipolar II disorder... just great...... taking meds for both (accutane+antidepressants+lithium)... and i believe it has helped a lot...... i have also been talking to my dad, brother and my closest aunt and cousin about my feelings (actually they are only the ones who know i'm bipolar...and of course my friends here at this site....still can't make myself reach out to my friends though... i feel like it's not the time yet)........ Find people whom you can really trust and won't judge you no matter what or how are you feeling..... you can rant out anything here in this site (believe me i have done it) and we'll understand because we're going through the same ordeal as you.
........ still fighting ACNE but i'm never gonna give up......... we're all in this fight together... never lose hope always keep faith...
FIGHT till the End....
........ still fighting ACNE but i'm never gonna give up......... we're all in this fight together... never lose hope always keep faith...
FIGHT till the End....
no.
it needs to simply be gone. im giving it an hour.
hope and faith and lesson sucks. diets and creams suuucks. regimens sucks omg! only pro of this shit could be that our skin is so nasty face eating zombies would spare us when apocalypse comes? well if only that. o--o
i like those pics!
........ still fighting ACNE but i'm never gonna give up......... we're all in this fight together... never lose hope always keep faith...
FIGHT till the End....
no.
it needs to simply be gone. im giving it an hour.
hope and faith and lesson sucks. diets and creams suuucks. regimens sucks omg! only pro of this shit could be that our skin is so nasty face eating zombies would spare us when apocalypse comes? well if only that. o--o
i like those pics!
Cool images..2 of them look like a japanese pop star, Ayumi Hamasaki. LOVE her!
Acne really does just need to go away and stop screwing us up but in the real world things dont just happen like that. You dont just become a millionaire outta nowhere, you dont just wake up one morning and find your soulmate laying next to you, you dont just get anything that easy in life. Everything begins and ends with forethought, hard work, and for some just circumstance. I've been fighting this battle for over 10 years..am now using a natural product and finally feel that this is the answer. my skin is getting better and better each day. And i'm glad actually. I'm glad i showed some patience and endurance because just think how awesome it will be when i finally do have that clear skin i've been working towards for what seems like forever. It will be AWESOMMMMEEE! 
i feel like that sometimes too youre not alone, you know acne can be treated , but acne scars is worst ;(
i had problem with big crowds of people and beening around groups of people, im pretty much lost the friends i made and friends i had when i kept turning them down to go out and have fun because of my scaring and acne, i was in the same boat as you droping out of uni and not able to get a job,
i finally deiced to get treatment how ever the person performing the fraxel was not skilled and left me with worst scaring and zero money ,
but even with all that i decide to get my self a job, so i got a job and worked night shift, slowly saving up enough to get my treatments for scars ;( night shift no one really comes in and no one around perfect for me 
for the time beaning
Like everyone said, go to the derm. Trust, they've seen all sorts of cases and im sure worse than yours so dont be nervous! It's better than trying to wait it out in misery. My acne breakout came all of a sudden, and when i say breakout i dont mean a few pimples here and there, i mean GIANT dinosaurs with a mind of their own all over my face. It was so bad, people i know would randomly approach me to ask what was happening to my face. (um....i dont go up to you and ask why youre having a bad hair day, geez). I couldnt look people in the eye, i would avoid the light like it was poisonous, never go out in daylight (actually im still kind of doing this..). I knew it was bad when my friends would say they could tell i was trying to avoid them/eye contact. I know this isnt much solace, but we tend to notice our flaws the most and other ppl may not even be seeing the flaws youre worrying about. I would say eff it and go out and enjoy your life, but that is waaay easier said than done. Good luck and hope things have gotten better c:
i know exactly how you feel :/ i basically dont do anything at all and stray away from it because of my acne and scars,i am not the person i use to be before it got this bad, I HATE It so much i always hide behind my hair, wear tons of make up ( which usually makes it worse but theres no way in hell id ever go out the door without it) and never get close to people or let people touch my face anything like that and i hate it i want to be the person i once was and not have to worry about these stupid things.. i want to be able to start my life and get a job go to college, and find true love , and i cant because acne is holding me back, and which sucks worse is no one undestands it at least my family they think im over reacting or just being over dramatic but im not its a real psychological problem for me and its makes me so depressed and anxiety ridden i just cant take it anymore, i have been going to the derm for awhile and have a treatmeant plan going but in my eyes its not moving fast enough i just want this gone so i can get on with my life and live :/ so i know exactly how you feel if you want to message me to talk that would be great! i see this is a old post so hopefully by now you have made some progess let me know! good luck.