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nick93

Will Not Having Acne Really Change Your Life?

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I know for a lot of people here, they feel like acne is ruining their life. They believe that if they didn't have acne, their life would be totally different, they would have more friends, be going on dates, and just be generally happier with life. I've done some thinking and I'm not so sure that your life will be 'magically' better once your acne goes away. I feel that my staying inside, ignoring friends, and making no effort to make new ones, we aren't really helping ourselves and its going to have a negative effect on us in the future. Are you really going to go and start talking to the people you've ignored for the past couple of years or year when you recover? I think we have to start making a change now, and making an effort to see our friends, reconnect with old friends, and make new ones.

Any other opinions?

Edited by nick93
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I don't think not having acne changes your life per say, it more affects your confidence. At the height of my acne I looked in the mirror and thought 'Why have I been telling myself I'm ugly all of these years? I'm not, but my acne is!'. Now that I'm clearing up I can still see the good features in myself that I thought were being masked by the spots. So in a way, getting clear has left me with a lasting impression that I really am a little pretty, despite the flaws I tend to focus on. It's made me realize that other people see you as a 'full picture' instead of picking out all the little flaws that we tend to dwell upon ourselves.

At my very lowest I took a step back and looked at my boyfriend as I always do. What did I focus on? His eyes, his smile, the things he was saying, his body language, his facial features. In general life we do not go in to as much detail analyzing other people as we do ourselves. When I realized that he sees me the way that I see him, and that the world sees me as a full person and not just the spots on my face, I felt a lot better.

Edited by Spotthedifference
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I don't think not having acne changes your life per say, it more affects your confidence. At the height of my acne I looked in the mirror and thought 'Why have I been telling myself I'm ugly all of these years? I'm not, but my acne is!'. Now that I'm clearing up I can still see the good features in myself that I thought were being masked by the spots. So in a way, getting clear has left me with a lasting impression that I really am a little pretty, despite the flaws I tend to focus on. It's made me realize that other people see you as a 'full picture' instead of picking out all the little flaws that we tend to dwell upon ourselves.

At my very lowest I took a step back and looked at my boyfriend as I always do. What did I focus on? His eyes, his smile, the things he was saying, his body language, his facial features. In general life we do not go in to as much detail analyzing other people as we do ourselves. When I realized that he sees me the way that I see him, and that the world sees me as a full person and not just the spots on my face, I felt a lot better.

Exactly, its not the person that's ugly, it's the acne. To be honest, I've been going through the same thing as a lot of others here, hiding myself from the world. I know I'm not ugly though, I've walked from the washroom late at night and my dorm mates female friends have commented on how hot they think I am. Of course, they didn't see my face, but I'm not just a face. I think a lot of people focus on what's wrong with themselves, and don't remember all the great physical qualities they have. Whether that be hair, a nice figure, abs, muscles, eyes, whatever! and most importantly character of course!!

When I realized that he sees me the way that I see him, and that the world sees me as a full person and not just the spots on my face, I felt a lot better.
That is so true! There is lots of people that can see you for the full person you are. I know my ex didn't like me for my acne haha. She liked me for who I was. I'm going to make a real effort to get out there after exams are done and really start enjoying life again, and I strongly encourage everyone else here to do the same. Throughout the past months I've been isolating myself more and more, and it hasn't made me happier. If anything its made me a little social incompetent, but I'm sure that can change quickly. Edited by nick93
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I guess I had to find out the hard way that it wouldn't change things. I went through twelve years with acne, experiencing negative things and stuff that upset me or made me feel bad. So it all built up during that time and I suppose it was understandable that I eventually started thinking those negative experiences and the resulting feelings would go away once the acne did, meaning life would then bet different and better. It wasn't really the case though.

If you're the kind of person who can find fault with yourself, it's likely that if you remove one perceived fault, you'll soon be able to find another one to focus on instead. By the same token, there are always going to be ignorant people out there who get a kick out of putting others down, so if the acne is no longer there for them to point out or make fun of, they'll soon be able to find something else they can target. Seemingly, that's life.

That's where I ended up. I cleared my acne but there was still the potential for me to make myself feel bad or to feel like I was being held back by stuff. That's more to do with thought processes and low self-esteem. Acne just gave me a way to justify those things so that I didn't have to face and address them. So even without the acne, I still feel the same. Likewise, people can still target me or put me down in some way if they really want to. In fact, if anything, I probably come across as an easy target to some if there's a visible lack of confidence, so that's something I'd like to work on and in the meantime, I just need to let it be their problem instead of taking it to heart and beating myself up with it.

Not having the acne doesn't give back all the things I was missing out on because of it. I cut my friends off because of it, years ago, so I'm still alone and lonely no matter what my skin's looking like and still without friendships or any relationship experience; I couldn't deal with facing everyone at work when my skin was bad, but I still aught to have been able to do my job regardless and now being acne-free certainly doesn't change the fact I'm unemployed; The way I feel about myself due to lack of experiences and things doesn't change now the acne has gone because those experiences and the confidence they may have given during those key years are still missing.

That being said, I'm not about to tell everyone that they should just get out there and enjoy everything without ever letting their issues with acne get to them in any way, shape or form. I don't really think that's feasible. But it does make me wonder if it's about finding a middle ground, whereby you have enough of a balanced perspective on things to say, sure, I have acne, but there are worse things and I don't have to let this stop me. There is a choice.

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I can compare my standard of living from clear skin all the way to severe cystic acne breakouts. The contrast is huge.

Having severe acne does change my life because it changes how I can express myself. And, as spotthedifference says, it's a confidence thing. With clear skin I feel the way most ordinary people feel. I'll approach others in bars, maintain eye contact, carry myself in a confident way; all because I know I'm looking the best that I can. Not perfect, and no supermodel, but my personal best.

With severe acne I avoid leaving the house, I take longer routes around town and campus to avoid people, I avoid eye contact, speaking, anything that involves me being in a social situation. It really takes it's toll.

I've been very lucky that my friends are supportive and understanding, so clear skin won't change the core of my life, no. But it'll change how I feel about myself and that's one of the most important goals for me. We have to feel positive about ourself before we can really make a go of things with others.

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I guess I had to find out the hard way that it wouldn't change things. I went through twelve years with acne, experiencing negative things and stuff that upset me or made me feel bad. So it all built up during that time and I suppose it was understandable that I eventually started thinking those negative experiences and the resulting feelings would go away once the acne did, meaning life would then bet different and better. It wasn't really the case though

Twelve years of acne must have been absolutely brutal, I can`t even imagine. Yeah, I don`t think we can just wait for things to get better. There has to be a real effort on our part to improve our lives.

If you're the kind of person who can find fault with yourself, it's likely that if you remove one perceived fault, you'll soon be able to find another one to focus on instead. By the same token, there are always going to be ignorant people out there who get a kick out of putting others down, so if the acne is no longer there for them to point out or make fun of, they'll soon be able to find something else they can target. Seemingly, that's life.

I know there are a lot of things I don`t like about myself, and I think about the flaws I have way too often. Its true, there are some people that are going to make it their business to make you feel bad; however, there are a lot of others that won`t. You have to remember that as a rule people won`t develop a dislike for you based on your physical appearance. I`ve been doing doing some serious self-reflection the past couple weeks, and I`ve come to realize that nobody, nobody has ever like me because of my physical appearance. My large group of friends and people that liked me, liked me because of my character. I was always extremely positive, very friendly, and had a great sense of humour. I wasn`t afraid to be myself.

That's where I ended up. I cleared my acne but there was still the potential for me to make myself feel bad or to feel like I was being held back by stuff. That's more to do with thought processes and low self-esteem. Acne just gave me a way to justify those things so that I didn't have to face and address them. So even without the acne, I still feel the same. Likewise, people can still target me or put me down in some way if they really want to. In fact, if anything, I probably come across as an easy target to some if there's a visible lack of confidence, so that's something I'd like to work on and in the meantime, I just need to let it be their problem instead of taking it to heart and beating myself up with it.

Not having the acne doesn't give back all the things I was missing out on because of it. I cut my friends off because of it, years ago, so I'm still alone and lonely no matter what my skin's looking like and still without friendships or any relationship experience; I couldn't deal with facing everyone at work when my skin was bad, but I still aught to have been able to do my job regardless and now being acne-free certainly doesn't change the fact I'm unemployed; The way I feel about myself due to lack of experiences and things doesn't change now the acne has gone because those experiences and the confidence they may have given during those key years are still missing.

It sounds like you`ve really hit rock bottom. I have cut off a lot of my friends as well, and this year I went to university and didn`t really make any real friends. You`re really beating yourself up, and I don`t think you should be. You sound like a fairly intelligent, competent guy; however, you`re focusing way too much on how your life has gone downhill. I`m not trying to be mean or uncaring, this is a feeling I struggle with myself too, really often. Thinking about how bad you`ve got it isn`t going to improve things. If you are totally alone, I`d recommend trying to get a job again and joining a dating site or something. Pursue an interest. Judging by the number of your posts, it seems like you care about other people, and want to help other people. Maybe volunteering is something you could look into. I know I can`t truly understand how you feel because, even though I don`t have any good friends at school, I still have some back home. I really hope that you don`t let yourself to continue to be unhappy though and make a real effort to improve your life.

That being said, I'm not about to tell everyone that they should just get out there and enjoy everything without ever letting their issues with acne get to them in any way, shape or form. I don't really think that's feasible. But it does make me wonder if it's about finding a middle ground, whereby you have enough of a balanced perspective on things to say, sure, I have acne, but there are worse things and I don't have to let this stop me. There is a choice.

Well put. I have to agree, chances are very few people are going to be able to completely look past their acne and feel confident in every situation like someone without acne might. I don`t think that should stop them from making an effort though. I plan on spending this summer reconnecting with old friends, and trying to get some of my old confidence back. Hopefully, I can work on my social skills too. To be honest, I`m not exactly looking forward to next school year. Its going to be lonely going back to a place where I don`t really have friends, but I`m going to try my best to go back with a more positive attitude and try not to let myself sink so low again.

I can compare my standard of living from clear skin all the way to severe cystic acne breakouts. The contrast is huge.

Having severe acne does change my life because it changes how I can express myself. And, as spotthedifference says, it's a confidence thing. With clear skin I feel the way most ordinary people feel. I'll approach others in bars, maintain eye contact, carry myself in a confident way; all because I know I'm looking the best that I can. Not perfect, and no supermodel, but my personal best.

With severe acne I avoid leaving the house, I take longer routes around town and campus to avoid people, I avoid eye contact, speaking, anything that involves me being in a social situation. It really takes it's toll.

I've been very lucky that my friends are supportive and understanding, so clear skin won't change the core of my life, no. But it'll change how I feel about myself and that's one of the most important goals for me. We have to feel positive about ourself before we can really make a go of things with others.

It definitely is a confidence thing, I know it has a huge impact on my confidence. Its great that you have supportive friends! I`ve just noticed that a lot of people are giving up hope, blaming their problems on their acne and wishing they would have clear skin because things would be different. I am guilty of thinking this way too. I just don`t think its healthy. If your pushing everyone away then you are going to miss out on a lot of fun with friends and may end up with very few or no friends. Even if your acne is gone, I think it might be hard to make a whole new group of friends when you`ve been pushing people away. I think people here just have to be careful. Acne effects your current situation, don`t let it have a large impact on what your future is going to be like too. I know I may sound a bit extreme and maybe even crazy aha, but I did a comparison of how happy I was last year with friends when I had bad acne and this year, with much fewer friends and bad acne. Last year, I was really happy, loving life. This year, I neglected to make new friends at university, and this year kind of sucked. I`ve become more of a loner, which isn`t like me at all since I love friends and having people around me all the time. Now, I`m making a resolution I guess to try to be optomistic, and make an effort to have fun and hang out with friends. Maybe it will even reduce my stress levels and improve my acne haha

Edited by nick93
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Not having acne will definitely change your confidence level. When it changes life around you changes as well. Your level of success is directly related to your level of self-confidence. So therefore not having acne will let you to show your potential. But probably you won't see drastic changes by just sitting home with a perfect skin ;)

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I agree Amy. I have just seen a lot of posts about how people`s lives have gone completely down hill and they are depressed. I`m just saying that I have been happy and had acne, but then I had to move to a completely different scene where I didn`t know anyone. I was self-concious about my acne, didn`t really make friends, and wasn`t happy. I`m just saying acne sucks, but try not to let it get to you so much. There is more to a person than their acne and a lot of people can look past it. I know this from personal experience. This applies as much to myself as it does to everyone else.

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I was clear for a while and life was still the same.. just that I went out more and didn't think of my skin at all. I broke out a while ago which sucks. That's why I better wait till I am clear for good to date, etc :D. I am trying not to get bad scars.. ;\

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Yeah, I can`t wait for my skin to clear up either! I`m sure it will make a difference in my confidence, but I still want to get out there and try to have a good time until then!

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I can say for sure that my life would have been different if Id never HAD acne to begin with It affected me by causing anxiety and panic disorder and I ended up never going to college or doing a lot of travelling because I was afraid of what people would think of me. I dont even have severe acne! I admire the people who have severe acne and just get on with their lives. To this day, I still have major issues with anxiety sometimes I feel like I can barely breathe in public places, and I just have to get away from people. Am I being paranoid? probbaly, but it isnt a nice feeling.

I have yet to come to terms with it...would clear skin dramatically affect my life NOW? Probably not, any big changes I wish for should have happned years ago and you cant go back. But Id say, I would be the most grateful person IF it just went away..I could just wake up and not have to be afraid to face myself in the mirror. I could go to the beach. I could feel confident enough to "deserve" a good job. I am still hoping it will just go away(with help from me trying to discover and fix the underlying cause) please God...

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I can say for sure that my life would have been different if Id never HAD acne to begin with It affected me by causing anxiety and panic disorder and I ended up never going to college or doing a lot of travelling because I was afraid of what people would think of me. I dont even have severe acne! I admire the people who have severe acne and just get on with their lives. To this day, I still have major issues with anxiety sometimes I feel like I can barely breathe in public places, and I just have to get away from people. Am I being paranoid? probbaly, but it isnt a nice feeling.

I have yet to come to terms with it...would clear skin dramatically affect my life NOW? Probably not, any big changes I wish for should have happned years ago and you cant go back. But Id say, I would be the most grateful person IF it just went away..I could just wake up and not have to be afraid to face myself in the mirror. I could go to the beach. I could feel confident enough to "deserve" a good job. I am still hoping it will just go away(with help from me trying to discover and fix the underlying cause) please God...

That`s sad, when I read something like this I feel terrible for the person. I`m also afraid of what people will think of me, but I`m trying to change that. I think its pretty incredible that some people are able to do that too. Its true, there probably should have been change years ago, but that doesn`t mean you can`t change now. It won`t be easy, but I don`t think there is ever no hope. I don`t want you to think I have it all together because I definetly don`t, I just want to get it together, and I`m going to try to be happy despite my acne. I struggle with self-worth as a result of it too, when I had a girlfriend I felt as if I didn`t deserve her, I was going to apply for an awesome summer job, but didn`t because I felt that it was a job for grown up people, but I look like a fifteen year old. I would have gotten it too, but I let my acne stop me. Don`t let your acne stop you. I hope you find the cause of your acne and can finally have clear skin! I`ll hold you in my prayers.

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Fuck yes i wouldnt be failing all my classes for one.

i would go out and live my life regularly without anything holding me back

actually have freinds

I would enjoy my life 100X more

I wouldnt worry about shit and wouldnt be mad all the fuckin time

i would actually attempt to get a girlfreind to fuck her brains out

i would attempt to get a job were i would actually interact with fellow employers without feeling like a mutated freak

i would fuckin eat ANYTHING

work out without worrying about breaking out from sweat

not have to continuously check my face condition constantly washing my greasy ass forehead

no more fuckin creams at night or routine face procedures

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh if only i didnt have this shit attached to me.

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I know for a lot of people here, they feel like acne is ruining their life. They believe that if they didn't have acne, their life would be totally different, they would have more friends, be going on dates, and just be generally happier with life. I've done some thinking and I'm not so sure that your life will be 'magically' better once your acne goes away

Sorry to tell you this, but my life was INFINITELY better after I went on accutane. 1000000% better. To imply that people are simply using acne as some sort of an "excuse" to mask a 'deeper' issue is downright insulting to acne sufferers.

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I can answer that question. 2 times accutane user here, so I know what it's like to go from having acne to having no acne. It doesn't change your life. It just makes everything easier. I'm not gonna lie, it's a very awesome feeling waking up in the morning not fearing any new pimples when going into the bathroom. It also makes everything much more enjoyable. But it doesn't magically make your life much better if you have deeper issues than acne (which quite alot of people seem to have on this board). That was my 2 cent. I'll end that by saying do yourselves a favor guys, take accutane and be done with it. I don't know how most of you guys pull up with that shit of trying a bunch of crap that never work when there's accutane.

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Fuck yes i wouldnt be failing all my classes for one.

i would go out and live my life regularly without anything holding me back

actually have freinds

I would enjoy my life 100X more

I wouldnt worry about shit and wouldnt be mad all the fuckin time

i would actually attempt to get a girlfreind to fuck her brains out

i would attempt to get a job were i would actually interact with fellow employers without feeling like a mutated freak

i would fuckin eat ANYTHING

work out without worrying about breaking out from sweat

not have to continuously check my face condition constantly washing my greasy ass forehead

no more fuckin creams at night or routine face procedures

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh if only i didnt have this shit attached to me.

This sums it up perfectly.

Acne has changed my life. I never had tons of confidence but having acne put me over the top. Now I walk around feeling like shit all of the time.

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I know for a lot of people here, they feel like acne is ruining their life. They believe that if they didn't have acne, their life would be totally different, they would have more friends, be going on dates, and just be generally happier with life. I've done some thinking and I'm not so sure that your life will be 'magically' better once your acne goes away

Sorry to tell you this, but my life was INFINITELY better after I went on accutane. 1000000% better. To imply that people are simply using acne as some sort of an "excuse" to mask a 'deeper' issue is downright insulting to acne sufferers.

I`m not saying that at all. I`m just saying that my acne developed in highschool and it sucked, but I was in my comfort zone so I managed to deal with it and still had a lot of fun. I went out a lot had a girlfriend, people liked being around because I was fun, funny, positive, and friendly. Then, I went to university, my acne was pretty bad and I really let it get to me. I stayed away from other people and had a terrible year. I`m just encouraging people to try to stay positive, just try. Don`t wait for years to live your life is what I`m saying. My acne is nothing compared to a lot of people in these forums, I can`t even understand what that must be like as mine really gets me down a lot of the time.

Here is some pictures of my acne, its not at its worst, its not at its best.

http://imageshack.us/g/443/img0560au.jpg/

So, what I`m getting at is that I`m trying to make a change to be happy again like I used to be when I had acne. Its not going to be easy, but sitting around miserable all the time really didn`t help me this past year.

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Yeah, that's true. I don't think anyone really understood the point I was trying to make besides PaulH85. Just try to be positive.

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Acne hasn't changed my life, it's affected my confidence a lot, but I try my best to go on with life and do everything I possibly can without somebody saying anything or making it hard for me. To be honest, other than shedding a few tears every now and then, my life has been the same as it was with flawless skin. The past six months has been brutal, but I have been trying to rise above it and I'm super glad that nobody treats me different. Everybody knows I'm still the same guy, so they don't even acknowledge my skin. I've had a few encounters from people I don't like and strangers, but I don't care about them. Making fun of someone with acne is a dog act and that's all I say to the people who put me down.

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Yeah, same here. It definitely has a huge impact on my confidence. Exactly, we are still the same people, and that counts for a lot. Acne sucks, but negativity won't get you anywhere. Way to remain positive man.

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Yeah, same here. It definitely has a huge impact on my confidence. Exactly, we are still the same people, and that counts for a lot. Acne sucks, but negativity won't get you anywhere. Way to remain positive man.

Cheers man. It's not easy, but I'm aware that I'm not alone and there are thousands of people out there with acne. To be honest, I would kill to have clear skin again, but I've become a better person because of acne. Sure, it's made my life a living hell for quite some time now, but if I never went through what I've been through, I wouldn't have the confidence when I need to stand up for myself or rise above hate or depression. Nobody deserves to go through the pain and suffering of acne, so the people that have never experienced it have no idea how lucky they are. If the person itself is nice, kind, loving, and full of life, then it doesn't matter if the person has acne or not, because it's what inside that counts.

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Haha, yeah same, clear skin would be awesome! Yeah, I know I've learned from it to. Appearance isn't as big a deal as to me as it was a couple years ago, that's for sure.

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Acne hasn't changed my life, it's affected my confidence a lot, but I try my best to go on with life and do everything I possibly can without somebody saying anything or making it hard for me. To be honest, other than shedding a few tears every now and then, my life has been the same as it was with flawless skin. The past six months has been brutal, but I have been trying to rise above it and I'm super glad that nobody treats me different. Everybody knows I'm still the same guy, so they don't even acknowledge my skin. I've had a few encounters from people I don't like and strangers, but I don't care about them. Making fun of someone with acne is a dog act and that's all I say to the people who put me down.

Yeah! I ignore people at work and those who make fun of people. I find it that it is the best way if i want to keep the job and good rep smile.png I remember my I never fought before and will never happen unless I must defense myself. smile.png

Acne made me a better person too. I avoided people, so I never learned anything bad from people. That's why I am nice guy. I am a vegan who eats 100% raw. I learned a lot about eating healthy because of acne. I want to stay vegan for ever and live longer, age slowly, more energy, etc.

Meh... I learned so much because of acne. :D

Edited by EddieE
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