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How often do you guys experience skin jealousy? Today I was at work feeling like shit about my face (as usual) and then one of my co-workers arrived. She's very pretty with flawless skin and I was just staring at her face as she was talking to me and thinking how the universe works in such mysterious and sometimes cruel ways. Just like they say, a genetic roll of the dice, you can be tall or short, thin or overweight, or have flawless skin or extreme acne. And people who are blessed didn't do anything to deserve it. They don't work harder than us, eat healthier, or take better care of their skin. Just genetic luck. So I'm thinking all of these thoughts as I'm looking at her skin and trying really hard to be mature and above it all and understanding and finally bam it hits me, I am so damn jealous of her I can barely see straight!! Not so much of her life or even of her looks, but man that skin is just so perfect and poreless. She's even told me that she just slaps on a little foundation as she's driving to work. Can you believe that? I spend at least an hour each morning doing my regimen which is so long and exhaustive I don't want to bore you with it, then I have to apply make up which consists of tons of foundation and concealer to hide how bad my skin is, practically like putting spackle on, and here she just slaps on a little sheer makeup while she's waiting for the light to change at an intersection. And please don't get me wrong, this girl is so nice and sweet, I don't hate her at all, I'm just so jealous of the lack of effort and ease that she must have in dealing with her skin. People who don't have skin problems can never ever understand the exhaustive hours of our life wasted dealing with this disease, the amount of time, effort, care, the hundreds if not thousands of dollars spent in search of the perfect product that will clear us up. It's like a lifetime spent in search of the holy grail that will change our skin and make it beautiful. Okay, sorry this was so long and incredibly negative but I felt I had to get it off my chest. Feel better now.

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Hey you never know, maybe she spent years finding acne products or is even on a regimen, and wants everyone to think she doesn't have to work at it.

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Know exactly how you feel. I doubt what the above guy said, you'd have to be pretty low to deny someone else who's dealt with this crap an out. don't know if this will work for you but have you tried Asepxia? Really made a difference for me. rolleyes.gif

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Yeah, been there many times. I find it really easy to fall into a distorted way of thinking, whereby everyone looks better than me, or they're happier than me, or they're superior in some way. It's all subjective, unfounded, and doesn't really make any sense, but I always do it and I always end up making myself feel bad. It's not even about my skin anymore because I can be clear and still have those feelings.

I was chatting on Facebook last week to someone local who posts on a page I'm part of about Dysmorphia. She got in touch to ask me if that was something I had, as she's had it since she was a child. I've met her very briefly once before and my first impression was that she was confident, talented and very attractive - someone I believed would never want anything to do with, "someone like me". It turns out that she's got all these issues with how she feels about her body, and she had severe acne in her teens which required two courses of Accutane. Just goes to show that things aren't always as they seem and that, maybe, those people we look at as being perfect also have or have previously had their own issues too.

I guess it's natural when dealing with acne or something that gets in the way to think, 'why me?', but it's also important to remember that it doesn't define who we are. Or at the very least, it's important to tell yourself that and then hopefully get around to believing it. I must admit though that I really struggle there so I'm not in a position to start preaching about it or telling people that it's easy because it certainly is not.

I do think that it can be a blessing in some ways, although that may only be apparent once it's over and done with. I mean, I genuinely believe that I'm so much more understanding and empathetic to towards people than I would have been if I'd never struggled with acne. It's essentially been a coping mechanism - to listen to others and take advantage of the fact that people usually like to talk about themselves, which in theory allows me to take the attention away from me - but they would only really notice that I care and wouldn't know of the motives behind it, so to speak. I struggle with interaction sometimes anyway - keeping conversations going and things, or reading how best to approach people and situations - so again, that coping mechanism kind of puts the control in the hands of others and I can step back and try and understand what's going on. No idea what that's all about though, don't think it's related so much to my experience with acne.

Ultimately, there are so many reasons you could find to be jealous or resentful of anyone, but it's of no good. It's not nice to be visibly jealous or resentful of others, but even if you hide it, it still doesn't feel good so nobody wins. I guess the trick is to think positively instead and learn to be more mindful of embracing who we are, inside and out, flaws and all. :)

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It sucks when EVERYONE you know has flawless skin, family, friends.....*sigh* Everywhere you go as well. I just feel intimidated because ALL I see is flawless skin. In everyone. Even if someone has acne I only see them at worst with midly moderate. I just really ask why did I have to carry all this load, and if it's ever going away. I just don't want to be dealing this for the rest of my life. I also wear makeup and I envy the girls who wear no crap on their faces. They only wear eye makeup and I have to be covering all my scars an acne. If they do wear any cover up its such a tiny layer and I get so mad. Not at them but at my situation. I ask why did I have to have these horrible genes. Why did I have to be dealing with hormonal acne and all. And that's true most people with flawless skin either don't do much or nothing. Many people don't put too much interest in skincare or in healthy eating and the have such flawless skin. I get envied at the way my family can eat WHATEVER and not get a single pimple. I'm just getting whirled up with just writing his so ill stop.

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Thanks guys. It's so nice to know that you can go to a site where people actually know and understand first hand what you are going through.

Kaylei, I know what you mean about how everyone around you can eat whatever they want. My co-workers today had quesadillas for lunch and they kept offering them to me even though I've told them a MILLION times that I can't eat dairy. And what did my family have for dinner tonight? Pepperoni pizza and soda. What did I eat? Grilled fish, steamed rice, salad, and iced tea with no sugar. Sigh.

Plumheart: I've never tried Aspexia and it sounds so tempting to try something but I got sooo burned this last time when I experimented with a product that I'm afraid to try anything else. I actually will probably never gamble with my skin like that again because this product absolutely annihilated my face leading to my current predicament.

Eddie: When I wash my make up off my face is COVERED in scars. Especially lower face and chin. I use full coverage foundation and concealer and even that isn't enough to hide everything, especially in certain lighting. Ahhh to have a clear scarless face...

Paul: Thank you for your responses. As someone else on here mentioned before, you really are a lifesaver when it comes to giving sage and thoughtful advice. I really need to start seeing beyond my own skin and current predicament and realize that there is more to me and my life than my skin. It's incredibly hard, but jealousy really does me no good. And really I could walk around all day feeling jealous and having an inferiority complex but it isn't going to change anything.

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I know how you feel. I am jealous of people with perfect skin too. It often makes me wonder what my life COULD have been had I not had this curse. But then again, i've wasted so much of my life and missed out because of my own insecurities. Just try to stay positive and try not to let it hold you back. Know that you're not alone in this life.

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you said everything so perfectly i feel the exact same way. I have a friend at school who has THE MOST PERFECT skin i have ever seen, even without makeup on its perfect. She'll say like "omg i look like shit today i didnt even put makeup on" and im like wtf u look better than me when i spend an hour on my foundation...and all u did was roll out of bed like 20 mins ago and drag ur butt to school.

i wish i hit the skin genepool jackpot...

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How often do you guys experience skin jealousy? Today I was at work feeling like shit about my face (as usual) and then one of my co-workers arrived. She's very pretty with flawless skin and I was just staring at her face as she was talking to me and thinking how the universe works in such mysterious and sometimes cruel ways. Just like they say, a genetic roll of the dice, you can be tall or short, thin or overweight, or have flawless skin or extreme acne. And people who are blessed didn't do anything to deserve it. They don't work harder than us, eat healthier, or take better care of their skin. Just genetic luck. So I'm thinking all of these thoughts as I'm looking at her skin and trying really hard to be mature and above it all and understanding and finally bam it hits me, I am so damn jealous of her I can barely see straight!! Not so much of her life or even of her looks, but man that skin is just so perfect and poreless. She's even told me that she just slaps on a little foundation as she's driving to work. Can you believe that? I spend at least an hour each morning doing my regimen which is so long and exhaustive I don't want to bore you with it, then I have to apply make up which consists of tons of foundation and concealer to hide how bad my skin is, practically like putting spackle on, and here she just slaps on a little sheer makeup while she's waiting for the light to change at an intersection. And please don't get me wrong, this girl is so nice and sweet, I don't hate her at all, I'm just so jealous of the lack of effort and ease that she must have in dealing with her skin. People who don't have skin problems can never ever understand the exhaustive hours of our life wasted dealing with this disease, the amount of time, effort, care, the hundreds if not thousands of dollars spent in search of the perfect product that will clear us up. It's like a lifetime spent in search of the holy grail that will change our skin and make it beautiful. Okay, sorry this was so long and incredibly negative but I felt I had to get it off my chest. Feel better now.

Good points. But maybe there is many people out there jealous of you as well. I mean, from your posts you seem to be quite intelligent and have an interesting personality. From your photos you appear to be very cute and have stylish hair. Everybody has their better qualities along with their flaws.That being said, I do sometimes notice people with perfect skin and wonder why I can't obtain that skin even though I TRY SO HARD! I guess we should all be thankful for what we do have. eusa_pray.gif

P.S. Has anybody ever been able to use this face -> tinydan.gif in context without forcing the issue? lol.gif

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