Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...
Junnn

How I Wish I Have Understanding Parents.

Recommended Posts

Today i just told my parents that i wan to drop out of school for the remaining semester (first year)before returning to school next year since i am using tretnoin and by that time it should more or less heal. They thought i was joking and say yeah yeah quit school sure. Later i told them i was serious and my mother ask whats my reason and i say its because of my acne. She and my sister wave it off saying who the hell quit school due to acne. I told them they don't understand and that i cant stand looking myself in the mirror and that even though my friends have not said anything( they are really good friends), im really self-conscious and low on confidence and my mind isnt even on studies and i just go to school for the sake of it. I teared up in the eyes ( i had no idea why that happen since im suppose to reason why i think i should quit school so that i can heal my acne and return with higher self confidence etc.) and that seriously make me hard to talk since im trying to control the type of hiccups u get from crying, not sure what it was but u get what i mean. I told her i can help her do the housework at home, she can stop giving me daily allowance since i will be at home most of the time but i dont understand why they dun understand! I mean wtf im the one whose wasting a year of education and missing out being with my classmates and letting down my group members in the project group, and at the same time going through the most difficult period of my life and all my parents have to do is to pay 1 more year of school fees which is like covered by government subsidy and school bursary and they fucking cant do that?!?!?! . is like im the one whose losing out more than them and they just dun fucking understand. And the result? i have to continue going to school. Seriously, sometimes i wish my family have acne so that they know how it feels. Its like I rather have a broken leg etc then acne! Everyday that passes makes me lose more respect and grow more defiance to my parents. Sometimes i feel that to really make my parents understand what i was going through, i should just suicide then they understand the seriousness of it and also i can forget about everythingm the stress the low confidence.

Off topic: For a guy i realize my eyes tear up fairly easily when im talking about sensitive things etc.(Luckily that only happen when im home =) ) which seriously sucks since im a guy and yeah u know like only girls do that, although it kind of stop for the past few years. BTW IM STRAIGHT. Many people say that when guys cry for their girlfriend, it means they really love her and they are hurting etc. If that is true i think i probably can con alot of girls LOL JOKIN (:

Peace out, mean while, school goes on......... Sorry for the long post, and thanks for those who read this :]

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

you can't let this control your life. it's hard but keep in mind it's only temporary. and i don't think girls mind if a guy has acne as much as guys mind if a girl has acne, so you have that going for you. at least we girls have makeup... but if you're that desperate, there are mineral makeups that can help give you an airbrushed look. if you learn to do it right, people won't know you're wearing it, and it can give you the confidence you need to sit through classes and participate in group work while the tretinoin purges your pore. i'm not saying break out the eyeliner and lipstick, but a good mineral foundation in the right color applied the right way will completely camoflauge your acne. just think of brad pitt, russel brand, zac efron, johnny depp, matthew mcconaughey, pete wentz, leonardo dicaprio... all these hot male stars wear makeup! so fuck what people think, do what you have to do to get your work done. if you let this get in the way of your education now, you're only going to regret it later.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dont drop out of school because of acne. You sound like a resilient individual, however your parents are not negative factors in your life, they are actually protective factors: because they dont let you give up even when you are at your weakest time in your life, are financially supportive, were understanding about your decision of taking the medication for your condition, and funding your education. You seem to have the ability to communicate well, are intelligent, are achievement orientated, and have a good sense of humor. Are you taking accutane? because if so, it should be giving you wonderful results in no time. Dont become consumed in your acne. You are allowing this to happen to yourself by letting it psychologically impact you so negatively. You control your life. It would be a sad thing if you chose to suicide as a means of escape, because like I said you are the expert in your life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

<p>

you can't let this control your life. it's hard but keep in mind it's only temporary. and i don't think girls mind if a guy has acne as much as guys mind if a girl has acne, so you have that going for you. at least we girls have makeup... but if you're that desperate, there are mineral makeups that can help give you an airbrushed look. if you learn to do it right, people won't know you're wearing it, and it can give you the confidence you need to sit through classes and participate in group work while the tretinoin purges your pore. i'm not saying break out the eyeliner and lipstick, but a good mineral foundation in the right color applied the right way will completely camoflauge your acne. just think of brad pitt, russel brand, zac efron, johnny depp, matthew mcconaughey, pete wentz, leonardo dicaprio... all these hot male stars wear makeup! so fuck what people think, do what you have to do to get your work done. if you let this get in the way of your education now, you're only going to regret it later.
Edited by Junnn

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe you have had an increase in testosterone? And you can purchase it from canadian online pharmacies with a prescription. I am not too sure of the health care system from where you are from but find out if you are eligible for any medical services through your school. good luck with school!! :-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If your parents are the ones paying for your tuition, living expenses, and basically everything, you really do have to play by their rules. Yes it sucks, but unfortunately you don't have much grounds for complaint here. I understand how emotionally and psychologically debilitating acne can be, but you should actually be grateful that your parents are stopping you from making a huge mistake in your life here: dropping out of school because of acne is not a good idea, especially if you're going to try to give yourself a "time frame" for your return because acne a) doesn't always get healed that quickly, and b) recurs in a lot of people. If your response is just to hide away every time something really bad happens, then you're going to end up making a lot of excuses for not living your life It's not like anybody is actually bullying you here instead of yourself, and I'll be frank: staying at home isn't going to help you because your bully (you) is still going to be lurking around every goddamn corner. You will sit at home in front of the computer hating yourself 24/7, whereas at school you at least have your friends and classes to distract you, if really only a little bit (that's still better than nothing, right?).

Look, sometimes I get so pissed off at my parents for being so unsympathetic to my condition. I mean they're supportive, but just yesterday my Mother started yelling at me for tearing up in the middle of dinner because (according to her) it's just so goddamn unbearable to be around somebody so weepy all the time and she feels like she was getting depressed by osmosis from just being around me. In her defense, I can see her point: I'm NOT fun to be around right now - I'm crying several times a day and basically when I'm THIS sad, I have a hard time considering other people over myself. My Father tells me he's just disappointed in his daughter because he thought I was stronger than this, which hurts because I basically agree with him except without the luxury of physical and emotional distance from the full debacle. On the other hand, I try not to focus on that and instead try to focus on all the stuff they get right, like putting up with my bullshit at all, being so financially supportive (I've basically got three years of law school plus a new apartment of my own all covered, although this has its own conditions...), driving me to and fro from work (public transportation makes me anxious these days), helping me pick up my medication/creams/whatever, making me food that actually adheres to my dietary restrictions (it helps that my Mother is a health nut and my Father is rarely home), and et cetera. Your parents probably do a lot of wonderful things for you too, so try to be grateful for that. You can't expect them to do everything right - they're human and they're doing their best.

Edited by hotburrito

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dropping out of anything because of acne is a bad idea, trust me. Where your education is concerned, of course your parents will have your best interests at heart. Plus, if they're paying for it, it's their call I guess. Yeah, it's easy for me to say this is I'm not walking in your shoes, but maybe you'll just have to tough it out until you finish the treatment. Might not be easy, but if you've got friends to support you then that's cool. By the end of it, you'll have fixed your skin problems and you won't have fallen behind or missed out on anything in school. It's a win-win! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Its hard as a parent to understand that request. School is very important and will shape your future.

Having said that, I too wish I had parents who were more serious about my acne in school. I often asked them to take me to someone who could cure it, and they always told me it was just a part of growing up. They never had it, so they will never understand the psychological damage it can do.

However, I would never recommend dropping out of school for even a year. There was one guy in my school who got a shocking breakout. His skin was crystal clear then basically all of a sudden he had acne the size of quarters on his face, everywhere. None of us changed our opinion of him or hung out less with him. He soldiered through it and got accutane which cured everything, scars and all.

Although its hard, take this approach:- Think screw it, I am going to be positive irregardless of what my skin looks like. Laugh and have fun with your friends. If one thing acne has taught me, is that if you take the right approach you become a much stronger person.

Best of luck, and keep your chin up!

Edited by Petey352

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your acne will cure with you going or not to school, so I suggest you don't drop out of it. I'm on Accutane, got a breakout a couple weeks ago, and nobody gave a f*ck about it. I just lived my life, got good grades, and this summer, I'm going to be taking as much care of my face as I can.

You'll be fine!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The problem is im not that strong mentally, there are numerous times where i skip school cus of it. I know you are suppose to think positively and not care about what others think. But its like too hard for me. Just wanna ask, does accutane cure acne marks or scars also?

Also, can you guys tell me what u will do:

1)U wear contacts and look good without specs but everyone can see all of ur acne.

2)U wear specs and some of ur very red acne will be covered by it. BUT you look like a nerd.

Which one u guys will choose?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm sure they just don't want you to set aside your education for acne. I understand where you're coming from but I think it's better to continue studying. If you'll just stay at home while waiting for your face to heal you'll be more prone to depression. I am not going to school right now and unemployed so I'm at home all the time and it sucks.

Think about it again and know your priorities. :)

The problem is im not that strong mentally, there are numerous times where i skip school cus of it. I know you are suppose to think positively and not care about what others think. But its like too hard for me. Just wanna ask, does accutane cure acne marks or scars also?

Also, can you guys tell me what u will do:

1)U wear contacts and look good without specs but everyone can see all of ur acne.

2)U wear specs and some of ur very red acne will be covered by it. BUT you look like a nerd.

Which one u guys will choose?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm sure they just don't want you to set aside your education for acne. I understand where you're coming from but I think it's better to continue studying. If you'll just stay at home while waiting for your face to heal you'll be more prone to depression. I am not going to school right now and unemployed so I'm at home all the time and it sucks. Think about it again and know your priorities. :)
But specs are cute! Haha! You don't have to choose. You can wear contacts when you don't feel like wearing the specs or the other way around. :)
I understand that but i got alot of dramas like vampire diaries to keep me occupied :) The point is stress is a factor in causing acne, and when i go to school and i lack confidence and being afraid of how ppl will look at me it will also cause stress on me which will result in worst acne?

Specs are cute yes! But sometimes i look like a nerd with it and sometimes i look fine, due to all the wind blowing my hair lol! , but thats not important anyway haha!

Side note : does accutane help acne marks/scars that are already on the face in any way? and when accutane cure acne, does it leave behind marks/scars?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

.................

Edited by lian8

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your parents would be shitty parents if they allowed you to quit school over acne. imo.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Accutane can't cure acne.

Edited by lian8

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

accutane cant cure acne?? First time i heard of it lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

accutane cant cure acne?? First time i heard of it lol

Yes, it can't cure acne a bit. Sorry to say, but all it can is to suppress the symptoms of acne while damaging your entire system.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know acne is horrible but don't make it a reason to quit school or worse, commit suicide. Feeling stressed and/or depressed plays a big role and if you can find something to counter that you'll feel a lot better. For me it was music. I was never into music before but after I started listening to all these great indie bands I got really into it and started going to concerts, even when I had horrible acne I went to those things and I realized everyone's eyes weren't on me and that no one pointed out how bad my acne was, I started feeling even better and I wanted to go out more (whereas before I never wanted to leave the house in fear of being ridiculed because of the acne). Anyways what I'm trying to say is you should find something to keep your mind off of this whole situation and eventually you'll gain the confidence. Something that calms you and takes the stress away and always hope your regimen works. Drink lots of water, never touch your face without washing your hands, etc

Edited by JD493

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Don't quit school. Few years ago, i didn't continue my study and follow what my parents had guided me, so i started a job.

But now i want to say that i'm really regret because of didn't choose the way they had ask me to and understand what the employer wants and requires.

Studying and getting qualifications are really important when you are about to step into a career.

So i have decided to continue my study, and joining the intake after 1 month from now.

And now i don't care how serious is my acnes, because my future is more important than my acnes.

Don't stress yourself, be happy!

God Bless~

Fighting! ^^

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please don't quite school or drop out of everything you have tried to accomplish, you are very brave to admit what you truly feel about your acne. I have no doubt that your acne is big, painful, red, and intolerable. If your family was that shocked about your acne problem, this MIGHT be a good sign... it probably means that your acne is not genetic and that they have never had severe acne before. This likely means that your acne is probably very temporary and you will eventually grow out of it. Although we look at ourselves more than anything else, have you ever noticed others? Perhaps other guys in the lunch rooms or on the football team? I can guarantee you 100 percent that in the right lighting you will see scars, acne scars, and overall irritation from oily, sensitive skin. They haven't given up and you are just as strong as them, perhaps even more! Try not to be mentally unstable and be lucky that you even have the ability to go to school at all! Also on your other post, nerds can be extremely hot sometimes so wear them smexy glasses if you want! XD

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Okay just wanted to update. Its been 5weeks since i last posted and i have to say i attend school mostly everyday ever since i posted except for lectures which is meaningless to me since i dont listen during lecture although if i have clear skin i would go ): Got to say my confidence wasnt great but i cope with it and my close group of friends in poly is awesome and they never talk about my acne, at least infront of me. Guys here will know as guys, we are insensitive to remarks and we call our guy friends pricks, bastards, son of a etcetc and we dont really mean that and so to not have any guy friend talk about my acne to me is a surprise but its good since it will obviously embarrass me :) Anyway i coped and had a 2 weeks break during Christmas holiday period and now im back to school. For the first time in 5 weeks or more i wore my contacts again on the first day back to school and it felt good because i look better without specs although i do miss the protection my specs give me to hide the scars near the temple area. Acne wise i think its improving. I went to my derma and continue my retinoids and antibiotics and she say come back in 4-6 weeks if still have pimples which seems to tell me that she is confident that it will go away. About acne marks/scars, i hope the retinoids will fade them. Also less than a month time i would have Chinese new year and would have to go visiting to my cousins, thats when it will suck. Last year during chinese new year my father was like saying my face got cured and its so smooth etcetc cus in the past i had similar acne to now and it got cured but now when when my cousins see me they will know it came back, will be embarrassing due to what my father said ): Short and sweet, thats all >:) Happy new yearrrrr!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It was for sure the best idea not to give up school!

I let my skin effect my University course and have regretted it everyday since.

You sound exactly like me, if I don't feel confident I stick my glasses on xD

But anyway, you have to keep thinking in the long term, you will regret it if you give up!

Good luck :3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes

×