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the uphill battle

Coming To Terms With Your Acne, Is There Any Hope?

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As I near my twelfth year of suffering with acne, I still struggle with accepting it. You'd think by now I would have given up on "growing out" of my acne or the dream that acne will someday not be a worry in my life, but I've yet to be able to. I feel so uncomfortable being "that girl" that's always broken out. I hate, even for my fiance, that he has to marry someone that may very well embarrass him someday with my breakouts, scarring and desperate attempt to conceal them with makeup. I'm pretty sure that I already have. I'm also uncomfortable being the only individual at my work with this persistent skin problem. I feel like such a martian sometimes. I wish so badly that I could accept my skin as part of me and my life.. but it has never felt like me and I fear it never will. Has anyone had any luck coming to terms with their acne? Accepting that they will never obtain the skin they would give anything to have?

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Hey, just to give you some background, I'm 14, and I've had acne for two years, starting very mild, but then got to moderate.

I know how you feel. I go to a school where it seems like everyone is clear except me and two other people. I feel so alone with it, and I always feel like whenever people look at me, they see one gigantic zit with eyes and a mouth. But the more you talk to people, and the more that you really see that it doesn't matter, you begin to let go of your concerns a little. Those who matter don't care, and those who care don't matter. Don't worry about something thats pretty much uncontrollable.

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It's something I'm still trying to figure out, thirteen years after it started. The older we get, I think the harder it becomes to keep hoping.

But, I've always argued that to accept it is to give up on it. In that respect, I refuse to accept it on the basis that I want it to be consistently better; enough that I can be happy with my skin and be happy being me. I won't give up on that. None of us should because we can all make it. I guess it's an internal thing. No matter what, we have to learn to love ourselves.

You certainly should not feel like you do, hating for your fiancé to marry you as you are. Please don't think that. You are beautiful as you are and clearly he loves you for who you are, inside and out. Never forget that.

:)

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Hi MJM,

Like you, I've been suffering with acne for over 10 years, and I have yet to come to terms with it. I've found the "journey" to be a veritable roller coaster of emotions - ranging from hopefulness when trying a new product for the first time, to excitement when it looks like the product is working, and inevitably to disappointment when the next breakout comes. I tell myself that I'm beautiful and that I'm being harder on myself than anyone else, but it's hard because you're right - it's not who we are, it's something we have to deal with, every single day.

Also like you, I've felt embarrassed for my boyfriend of 6 years. I look at his flawless skin and can feel myself turning green with envy. Luckily, I'm not embarrassed enough to keep my frustration from him, and he is very understanding and supportive (as I'm sure your fiance is). Your fiance loves you, plain and simple. He's seen you with and without make-up, and I can guarantee that it doesn't make a difference to him because you're the woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with.

Try to stay positive. We're young, healthy (hopefully), and we live in a time when we can support each other (via blogs like this) from the comfort of our own homes. There's a solution out there for both of us, we just haven't found it yet.

Hope this provides a little comfort. Chin up, kiddo!

Pleslie88

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Thank you for everyone's kind words, I really appreciate it. Yesterday was rough going to work with scabs and a new pimple that formed under my eyebrow (how does that even happen??). I'm trying to be hopeful, though. I've been through all the OTC meds as well as prescriptions excluding Accutane. I will be seeing a new derm at the end of this month that I hope will have some new innovative solutions for me. And of course, I will be sure to share them all with you on here.

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Do you tweeze or wax your eyebrows? For me, that would cause me to break out by my eyebrows. It helps some to only tweeze them after a warm shower and to rub the tweezers down with rubbing alcohol. My hair is also a cause of eyebrow pimples. I find it hard to accept as well though I would not hesitate to love or accept anyone else if they had this skin condition. I don't think accepting being broken out means that you have to give up on trying to make it better. There's so many things to try with both the conventional and holistic routes, that it may just be a matter of time before it gets better. Wish the process was way faster though!

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Thank you, Melissa. I do tweeze, but have never experienced the eyebrow pimple before.. it had the worst timing too. It was so red, large and painful. It made a lovely addition to the other 5 scabs on my face. I wanted to call in to work so bad!! I will try your shower idea though since that could have potentially been the cause.

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i know what you mean. that's why i'm here, in the 'psychological section'

it's like ya, i've read it all. i've tried it all. and it still haunts me.

Hi, my name is rbamf, and I have an acne problem... ;p

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Maybe it's one of those things you never can accept fully, just find new (and probably better) coping mechanisms for as life goes on.

...I don't know if that was at all helpful or just horribly depressing, though :(

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