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TK9109

Does acne make a difference in a relationship?

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I am a guy, recently single and I had the horrible experience of being told by my ex that she "would find me attractive if I didn't have acne". I was so taken back by this that its totally changed by social life. feel as though every first impression is now a bad one because of my acne. I kinda just want insurance that there are some people that look past that. I know I do.

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Yes, it does (sorry, that's just the absolute truth; acne is a complete turn off). If you have moderate acne, moderately severe acne, or severe acne (I have moderate acne), your preety much fucked. If you have mild or mildly moderate acne, you have a CHANCE at getting girls. I don't even ATTEMPT to talk to girls (hell, I won't even look a girl or anyone in the eyes, so obviously, I won't) because of the sheer fact I have acne and it's preety much a proven fact girls find acne disgusting and want guys with perfect skin (like I used to have *sigh*). I'm scared of being told "You'd be good looking if it wasn't for your acne" (which in reality, I would because I'm a decent looking guy) because that would just make me feel like complete and utter shit. I'm sorry she told you that, though. Just move along and just take my advice and don't waste your time with females while you have acne. It's really not worth it (the dissapointment I mean) and your self esteem will just fall even lower if a girl rejects you (which is going to happen if you have moderate - severe acne). Just know your not alone. I can't get a girlfriend either and it sucks, believe me, I know.

18, male.

Edited by Kody_R_F

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There are DEFFINATELY a lot of people who look past acne or any other imperfections someone can have. Honestly, the amount of people I have known over the years who have had varying degrees of acne and have been majorly crushed on by guys/girls etc is massive. The prettiest girl at my highschool (in my opinion) didn't have perfect skin but she was such a wonderful person inside and out no one cared, it didn't even cross peoples minds. The same goes with guys at school who have been fancied by girls regardless of their acne.

Why your ex said that is beyond me, but please don't let it affect you badly. Not everyone out there is like that. (: Also look at the amount of people who are members on here who have boyfriends and girlfriends? They are all found very attractive by their partners regardless of whether they have acne or not.

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I am a guy, recently single and I had the horrible experience of being told by my ex that she "would find me attractive if I didn't have acne". I was so taken back by this that its totally changed by social life. feel as though every first impression is now a bad one because of my acne. I kinda just want insurance that there are some people that look past that. I know I do.

Dude, I've met a girl once who had really bad acne. She had blackheads, pitted scars all over her cheeks... But I was totally smitten nevertheless. Nuff said. :hifive:

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No, it doesn't. I am adamant that the problem with acne is you, not your acne. Harsh but true. Acne is rarely a turn on for someone (never say never), but it's not a deal breaker. Guys who are ugly get laid all the time, we all know that. Charm, intelligence and confidence are a hundred times more important. There are hundreds of books about this, emphasising that attraction isn't a choice. In fact, a quick Google search reveals to me that phrase in itself is a book title.

Imagine if you woke up tomorrow with completely clear skin. You really think that would really make a difference?

Acne may make it harder for you to get confidence, but if you can hold your head up high and proud with bad acne, you can pretty much fight through anything. It's a lot easier to blame acne for your problems than it is to get up and do something about it.

This is one time you are definitely luckier to be a guy in the dating world. Your looks really don't matter that much. It pains me to say, but guys place more importance on the looks of a potential partner than girls do. Imagine how it must feel to be a girl. I know it's cold comfort and seemingly insensitive for me to say "it could be worse", but I think it's important to establish a sense of scale in suffering because suffering is relative.

I've started approaching girls a lot recently. One thing I've realised is that they're usually pretty damn polite and nice, and even more shockingly they are often just as attracted to me as I am to them. Makes me regret all the years I never approached girls, never took chances or wasted time pining after one girl. Better late than never, though. The world is a place of infinite possibility and it's our duty to the dead to appreciate that. By no stretch of the imagination am I what you would class as handsome, either. Really skinny, terrible skin, strange facial features. I'm pretty weird, too. I've had more attention and success in the last three months than I have in the entirety of the last 5 years.

You should check out The Game by Neil Strauss. The book has changed my life - it's about a guy who goes from a complete failure with women to being a massive success. I think it starts with the line "throw out everything you know about dating". You can transform your life with this. I am in the process of doing it right now. The only thing holding you back is yourself, trust me.

Nineteen year old male with terrible skin. This little verse sums up what I'm rambling about better than I ever could. It's the last stanza of the poem "Invictus" by William Ernest Henley and it's about self-determination.

"It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll.

I am master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul."

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I am a guy, recently single and I had the horrible experience of being told by my ex that she "would find me attractive if I didn't have acne". I was so taken back by this that its totally changed by social life. feel as though every first impression is now a bad one because of my acne. I kinda just want insurance that there are some people that look past that. I know I do.

Many people can look beyond acne. I have found many guys who have acne attractive. And looks are only a part of it. Obviously there has to be some kind of physical attraction, but for me at least, its more about personality.

I wasted a lot of time and missed out on many things because I let my acne alter the way I interacted with people. Try not to do the same. :)

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Yea, I know what you mean. Its just hard to keep your chin up and then come across a mirror and be put down again. I am trying though. thanks for the support.

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I am so sorry that she said that to you. I know it hurts but if she's really that superficial, in a way aren't you glad that she said that so you could rid her from your life? Anyone that cruel on the inside is far more unattractive to anyone with acne, no matter how minor or how severe it is.

In an actual relationship acne doesn't, and shouldn't make a difference. You shouldn't want to be with someone that would care enough about something so superficial. But initially meeting someone and first impressions, it might matter to someone who is superficial, but who wants to be in a relationship with someone who cares so much about appearances? I guess acne is our own little fool proof way of finding who loves us for us, not just our physical features. best of luck in the future :)

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I edited my original post because it was too negative for my tastes.

In short I do believe acne matters. Everything in nature is inherently programmed to be attracted to the image of the alpha male. However, humans are empowered like nothing else the world has ever seen to make life beautiful.

Edited by Portis

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It is what you make it. Look, I've had my fair share of self esteem issues with myself becuase of my acne and i thought i could never date someone who could look past it. But I've been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now, and he always tells me i'm beautiful. truth is, some people don't look past it. but you just have to find the right person who will.

keep your head up, your acne won't last forever and you'll find that perfect someone who loves everything about you, including your imperfections. :)

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hi there

ok being a girl when i look at a guy who has acne i dont really care

to me i love a good heart, funny, good smile, mice bone structure, hair blah blah

i guess what i am trying to say is i might notice the acne but it definently DOES NOT turn me ooff in a way i like some acne, it gives character, andalso it kinda makes u feel less self concious about your skin, knowing they r in the same boat as u.

personally dont listen to kody, i mean everyone has dif opinions, but the cutest guy at my school had severe acne

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I hardly had acne until I graduated high school then it came! But when I was in high school I dated a guy that had acne for a while. I never thought about his acne or anything so whenever I get sad about my acne present time, I think about how I never thought about his acne, so maybe people look past mine. We dated for a while and the only time it ever came up was when he mentioned it. Even when I'd kiss him on the cheek and he had some medicine on his face, he'd tell me oh I have stuff on my face but I never thought about the fact that it was a turn off he had acne. Because it wasn't. Even kissing him with that stuff on, was actually a funny moment for us. What I'm trying to say is some people do look past that. At least I do, and I am a good looking girl, so don't let it get you down.

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well if its a guy, who cares about their skin, i like them if they have a good personality...but for girls, its another story. guys date a girl 95% on looks alon, personality wise: they just dont need to be annoying or an air head.

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No, it doesn't. I am adamant that the problem with acne is you, not your acne. Harsh but true. Acne is rarely a turn on for someone (never say never), but it's not a deal breaker. Guys who are ugly get laid all the time, we all know that. Charm, intelligence and confidence are a hundred times more important. There are hundreds of books about this, emphasising that attraction isn't a choice. In fact, a quick Google search reveals to me that phrase in itself is a book title.

Imagine if you woke up tomorrow with completely clear skin. You really think that would really make a difference?

Acne may make it harder for you to get confidence, but if you can hold your head up high and proud with bad acne, you can pretty much fight through anything. It's a lot easier to blame acne for your problems than it is to get up and do something about it.

This is one time you are definitely luckier to be a guy in the dating world. Your looks really don't matter that much. It pains me to say, but guys place more importance on the looks of a potential partner than girls do. Imagine how it must feel to be a girl. I know it's cold comfort and seemingly insensitive for me to say "it could be worse", but I think it's important to establish a sense of scale in suffering because suffering is relative.

I've started approaching girls a lot recently. One thing I've realised is that they're usually pretty damn polite and nice, and even more shockingly they are often just as attracted to me as I am to them. Makes me regret all the years I never approached girls, never took chances or wasted time pining after one girl. Better late than never, though. The world is a place of infinite possibility and it's our duty to the dead to appreciate that. By no stretch of the imagination am I what you would class as handsome, either. Really skinny, terrible skin, strange facial features. I'm pretty weird, too. I've had more attention and success in the last three months than I have in the entirety of the last 5 years.

You should check out The Game by Neil Strauss. The book has changed my life - it's about a guy who goes from a complete failure with women to being a massive success. I think it starts with the line "throw out everything you know about dating". You can transform your life with this. I am in the process of doing it right now. The only thing holding you back is yourself, trust me.

Nineteen year old male with terrible skin. This little verse sums up what I'm rambling about better than I ever could. It's the last stanza of the poem "Invictus" by William Ernest Henley and it's about self-determination.

"It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll.

I am master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul."

this is the reason ive always wished i could be a guy

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Yes, it does (sorry, that's just the absolute truth; acne is a complete turn off). If you have moderate acne, moderately severe acne, or severe acne (I have moderate acne), your preety much fucked. If you have mild or mildly moderate acne, you have a CHANCE at getting girls. I don't even ATTEMPT to talk to girls (hell, I won't even look a girl or anyone in the eyes, so obviously, I won't) because of the sheer fact I have acne and it's preety much a proven fact girls find acne disgusting and want guys with perfect skin (like I used to have *sigh*). I'm scared of being told "You'd be good looking if it wasn't for your acne" (which in reality, I would because I'm a decent looking guy) because that would just make me feel like complete and utter shit. I'm sorry she told you that, though. Just move along and just take my advice and don't waste your time with females while you have acne. It's really not worth it (the dissapointment I mean) and your self esteem will just fall even lower if a girl rejects you (which is going to happen if you have moderate - severe acne). Just know your not alone. I can't get a girlfriend either and it sucks, believe me, I know.

18, male.

this is exactly true. i cant even begin to talk to a girl because as soon as she sees my acne she cries and runs away. i dont even have a chance. one time i wore a box on my head and was able to pick up girls, but as soon as i took off the box they ran away, screaming in horror and disgust.

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I actually think acne is a huge turn-off. And this is coming from someone who breaks out. It's not so much that they have acne, but it's like it just seems like a lack of hygiene. There are ways to get rid of your acne or keep it at bay, but it's like some people just don't care and are like this is me take it or leave it, which I guess is a positive way of looking at yourself. But if you're not comfortable with your acne how can you expect someone else to be.

That's why being in a relationship and having breakouts or acne is tough. Especially one day where you have perfect skin and the next you've got this giant zit. I just tell me boyfriend I break out from time to time, it really bothers me and I try my best to keep my skin at it's best. Luckily for me he doesn't care and just loves me for me as I do him for him when he has his breakouts. But I do make it a thing of mine that when I am having a bad breakout to stay away from my boyfriend until it gets a little better. Call me stupid, but I wanna be at my best for him and he's a good looking guy who deserves a good looking girl who tries to stay well kept.

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call me wierd but i find a guy with a little acne a COMPLETE turn on :wub: i dont so much like baby face boys like justin bieber XD

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call me wierd but i find a guy with a little acne a COMPLETE turn on :wub: i dont so much like baby face boys like justin bieber XD

I agree. I think it's cute when guys have 1 or 2 pimples. Not a full face of acne, but I definitely don't mind a couple of pimples

And on topic: Acne can definitely have an impact on establishing a relationship. But if an established bf/gf dumps you because you're getting acne, to hell with that! Your ex sounds like a vain b**ch. What a hurtful and petty comment. True relationships are based on much more than attraction

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call me wierd but i find a guy with a little acne a COMPLETE turn on :wub: i dont so much like baby face boys like justin bieber XD

I agree. I think it's cute when guys have 1 or 2 pimples. Not a full face of acne, but I definitely don't mind a couple of pimples

And on topic: Acne can definitely have an impact on establishing a relationship. But if an established bf/gf dumps you because you're getting acne, to hell with that! Your ex sounds like a vain b**ch. What a hurtful and petty comment. True relationships are based on much more than attraction

same here, i have never liked guys that have perfect skin...I'd rather have them rouffed up looking

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"same here, i have never liked guys that have perfect skin...I'd rather have them rouffed up looking"

Well in that case, I must be a complete stud, cause I'm rouffed ? up to the max lol. Seriously though, I have seen some girls with severe acne that look amazingly beautiful to me. Its there eyes.. a nice smile can be the icing on the cake. For the guys out there, I have severe scarring, and I still get looked at by girls. I know its been beaten like a drum, but going to the gym and getting in shape, REALLY builds your confidence.. and confidence attracts women (duh).

Edited by ScottC has no game

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