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Gutterflower

Acne and other body image issues.

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I go through phases where my skin will be decent so I'll switch focus to my body and be unhappy with that, like I can't give myself a single moment's break from the self-loathing. It's unhealthy, I know, but I don't know how to be happy with myself anymore. I honestly look in the mirror and see nothing that I like about myself.

I'm constantly on a diet which I'm sure doesn't help my skin, I look in the mirror constantly, not out of vanity, but out of fear that even more imperfections are appearing when I'm unaware. This is all really stupid. I just want to get out of my own head. How do you feel good about yourself? I mean... where do you start when all you know how to do is hate yourself...?

(I'm not fishing for compliments, just maybe other people who know how to help, or who feel the same way. None of the nice things people say to me ever sink into my thick head anyway and I'm deflective when I'm paid compliments, it's a habit that annoys the crap out of people and I can't help it.)

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sure, i've hated myself. i've hated my self for having this condition. only through experience was i able to accept myself more. with time. it's like, if you don't love yourself, who's gonna love you? try to think "how lucky would someone be if they were my friend/partner/associate? very lucky!" see your self as worth it and deserving of having a good life.

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I got this same problem, sometimes i check mirror and my skin is like 'ok' then i see my hair or my body is muscular enough..not the right cloths.. it goes on and on :'(.

I looked good today though for sure, then I came home and my hair was fucked in the mirror, I dunno what to do with it lol i got no styles :'(

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In your recent post(The vitamin one) you showed us pictures of you skin now. It's almost perfect and you shouldn't be worrying about it anymore. Unless it was just awesome lighting. That happens to me sometimes too.. in the dark.

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sure, i've hated myself. i've hated my self for having this condition. only through experience was i able to accept myself more. with time. it's like, if you don't love yourself, who's gonna love you? try to think "how lucky would someone be if they were my friend/partner/associate? very lucky!" see your self as worth it and deserving of having a good life.

For me it alternates between "My skin is disgusting." and "I'm so fat." (I'm not even fat. The stupid thing is, I know I'm not fat... but I still think I'm fat?)

My boyfriend thinks I'm all kinds of great the way I am but it doesn't make a difference when he tries to convince me. It's like my self-esteem packed her bags and moved to Narnia. I like my personality, and I know that I'm quite intelligent, it's just physically I feel like I fall short.

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In your recent post(The vitamin one) you showed us pictures of you skin now. It's almost perfect and you shouldn't be worrying about it anymore. Unless it was just awesome lighting. That happens to me sometimes too.. in the dark.

Nah, actually, the lighting was awful... my skin has cleared up a lot, but I still break out, and I hate my face as a whole anyway. But when my skin looks like that, like I said, I switch to feeling fat.

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at least you realize that most of your fears are just an illusion, work on it, think it rationally, if you're a smart individual like you say you are, and i believe it, you will get to the truth on your own, be able to see clearly, concentrate, and accept yourself.

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I got this same problem, sometimes i check mirror and my skin is like 'ok' then i see my hair or my body is muscular enough..not the right cloths.. it goes on and on :'(.

I looked good today though for sure, then I came home and my hair was fucked in the mirror, I dunno what to do with it lol i got no styles :'(

I'm sure your hair was fine. :D I feel like that when I get home from clubbing. My hair is wet from sweat (we take dancing very seriously, haha) and my makeup has all run down my face.

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at least you realize that most of your fears are just an illusion, work on it, think it rationally, if you're a smart individual like you say you are, and i believe it, you will get to the truth on your own, be able to see clearly, concentrate, and accept yourself.

I don't think it makes me any less smart to have problems accepting myself. When low self-esteem has gone on for as long as it has with me, it's a hard thing to overcome.

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i realize its hard, and it will take time, it is only right to feel like that. my point being that you don't deserve it, nobody does, i wish you the best in trying to come to the conclusion that you will be fine as long as you love yourself the way you are and accept that you're a good human being, inside and out.

take care.

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