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The emotional pain my acne has caused.

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Hey guys thought i would post my story.

I am a 17 yr old male in high school. I have had acne since i was 12. By the time i was 14 i had extremely severe acne and had it since. And im not just talking a big cyst here and there. I mean all over my back, chest, face and back of my neck. Its gotten to the point where i wake up in the morning to find blood all over my bed sheets. i difficult for me to sit on chairs at school because the acne is sooo painfull. I cant wear white or light shirts anymore because too much blood will be visible.

Ive been on accutane now for 7 months... and to be completely honest i havent seen an improvement at all.

Since i started getting acne back when i was 12, constantly i have been made fun of at school. Its a pain for me to go to school everyday because i get bullied and in fear of being judged. Someone makes a remark about my acne every day. i hate it especially when someone says something to me loudl,y so other people can hear on purpose. This hurts me so much. I cant see how people can be so cruel. Its not like i ask for it either, i would never say anything bad about anyone. ive never payed out anyone before.

here are some of the things ive been said to me( i can remember them because they hurt me so bad):

'no wonder you've never had a girlfriend with a face like that your lucky enough to have friends'

'your face is digusting'

'sorry dude, but your acne is hideous'

and soooo many more. Most of these comments have been from so called 'close friends' and even cousins that i am so close to.The people who i thought care about me. To be completely honest, and its hard for me to say this but when ever someone says something about my acne i go home and cry.

i cant believe people can be so cruel. People that i have known all my life, even pay me out. I Could NEVER do this.

Ive always been a quite kid but acne has made it a whole lot worst, my extremely severe acne makes me sit in the back of the classroom by myself. I avoid social situations in fear that i will be judged. I feel so alone because i have no real friends. Sometimes my teacher asks me a question because im so quite and everyone looks at me i feel so scared everyone is looking at my acne. I hate all attention on me.

im sick of all this acne. i feel i cant live a normal life. Ive never had a girlfriend in my life and to be honest i dont have any friends that are girls, not even one. I dont even consider myself to have friends ... maybe people that i speak to more.. but no real friends.

im writing this to tell you my pain emotionally and physically. I also ask if this accutane fails, what will happen?

thankyou for reading

sorry for bad english

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It sounds like you really need a friend. You can talk to me if you want. I know that talking to people on here has been the biggest help so far. Support is crucial. Do I still have acne? Yes, but it's slowly improving - I think. :]

I'm sorry the kids at your school are so mean. I never had to experience that. I've had acne for a while, but I've never heard anything said - except for maybe once. I think most people bully so they can feel superior to you. That once instance I was talking about happened with a heavier set girl. I don't remember what she said, but it wasn't nice. And you know what happened to her - she's anorexic, bulemic, and in and out of rehab. They're just as troubled on the inside, and they think it's going to go away with bullying. I'm not defending them by any means, because it's still wrong. Maybe you could talk to somebody about the bullying - possible a counselor?

Don't be afraid of being judged. People are going to, although they really shouldn't. I think acne is just an obstacle that we have to get over. It may not be the one I would of picked, but it's here.

I just want you to know that you can get over this, and you will. Don't lose hope, even on your worse days. I know that I do once in a while, but I try not too.

If Accutane fails, your life isn't over. Then you try something else, and if that fails you try everything until you find something that works. That is that I'm doing.

I wish you the best of luck. And I'm here if you ever want somebody to talk to, or you just need a friend.

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How many more months to go till u graduate from HS? Once u graduate take a gap year and just rest at home and focus on improving your skin. Just be patient for now itll be over in no time. And I'm really sorry you're going through this. I know how it feels like to be bullied. Been there..the problem is people have no idea how it feels like to have acne and instead of being supportive they treat us like dirt. Right now stick with your family cause theyre the ones who can really understand and give u the emotional support ure looking for. Friends wise, I advise you to befriend people who can relate to you i.e. Have acne problems too..

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