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Katushkinz

Started a low dose of accutane for mild acne

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Faithinhim and Littleredpoppy,

Thank you so much for your words and for being there for me.

Something really random happened yesterday. It was freaking cold here [in Chicago] yesterday, so after my midterm ended, I had to catch a bus to go home. Well, in order not to wait outside in the cold, I stayed inside the atm place... So this guy walks in (why do people have to copy my idea) and started talking to me about where he works, how cold it is, etc... So anyways, to cut to the chase, he ended up asking me out for valentines day and gave me his number... Oh yeah, he kept telling me how cute I was and how beautiful my eyes were...

I realize that with the mineral foundation I look pretty good, I even like myself... Still, that was a little randon... I have my workout with my trainer on monday (valentines day), so I'm guessing that that is how I'm going to spend that stupid day...

Today I am going to be starting my first day of 60mg!!!!!

Have a good day everybody...

P.S. can anyone tell me how I can input text that is crossed out in the mdidle? I can't seem to find the button or function for that...

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Hey kat!!

Glad that u are doing better now! I am so happy for u! Good luck on the 60mg dosage. U are on the road to clear skin !

Oh, do u mean the "strikethrough" function? Just go to the icon beside "underline", there u would see a double "aA" icon.. Just click on the drop down arrow and u would be able to see "strikethrough" function! VoilA! haha

And oh, Enjoy LA!!

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So this guy walks in (why do people have to copy my idea) and started talking to me about where he works, how cold it is, etc... So anyways, to cut to the chase, he ended up asking me out for valentines day and gave me his number... Oh yeah, he kept telling me how cute I was and how beautiful my eyes were...

I realize that with the mineral foundation I look pretty good, I even like myself... Still, that was a little randon... I have my workout with my trainer on monday (valentines day), so I'm guessing that that is how I'm going to spend that stupid day...

Today I am going to be starting my first day of 60mg!!!!!

Have a good day everybody...

P.S. can anyone tell me how I can input text that is crossed out in the mdidle? I can't seem to find the button or function for that...

awwww, sweeet! so glad things are working out for you. is he cute? :P

what kinda mineral foundation do you use? powder, 2 way or liquid? cos we have all three types here and i'm just wondering :P

ooh do let us know how 60 mg is going for you! :)

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hey katherine!

i'm so glad for you for getting that internship at EY!! My company uses them as our auditors so yea I think it's pretty awesome that out of the big 4 you went to EY =P

Also that story about the guy in the ATM!! omg that's awesome =D =D It's such a huge ego boost isn't it? Did he ask for your number or anything?

Anyhow, whether or not someone has told it to you, I believe you are beautiful anyway =D

Hoping the dosage works out better for you.. It takes time, so be patient (I know, everyone say that, right? haha).. We will all get there =D

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I've lost count, but its around DAY 41

I'm not a happy camper right now. I went for the deep pore cleansing on friday. She did a good job, I guess, but these 2 days, the redness is fading SO mfkg slowly... and then on saturday morning I developed another small cysts above my eyebrow..

And after being so frustrated with all of this, I picked at my skin... horrendously, I should say... I need this to heal in exactly 26 days... I'm sitting here with this healing ointment all over the wounds/lesions... When I saw my PA yesterday (I go to my derm once a month and I see this other PA once a month too), all she said was "I don't see much acne, all I can really see are picked wounds and lesions"... And she's right... there isn't much acne now... of course, some small things still exist, since 41 days is way too small of a time, considering the 20 days of the small dosage that I started out with... But still, I look horrendous right now... Have been really down for the last 2 days ... Yesterday, I think i've cried my month's worth of tears... I need this to heal...

The PA said it will take at least 5-7 days for the wounds and lesion to heal... Damn it, I have to go to the gym tmr, not mentioning work... Oh how much do I hate picking... how much do I hate having wounds, bruises and lesions...

I think it was the same after the first facial, but somehow the 2 weeks after everything healed and I looked really good blackened the memory of the healing week out...

I feel really down right now... If anybody has any advice on how to heal all these f****g red spots, cuts, etc. faster and make myself look presentable, I would be really glad... I want to enjoy LA, my family and my vacation, but with this face, I'm sure I can't... its not possible, when I look great on one side and horrendous on the other side...

Mostly, the red wounds/lesions are on the right side of my face going around the edges of it from forehead to cheekbone... its like a rim of redness... i remember some of the things that I have now looking exactly like they did the last time... I think I'll be taking a little more vitamin C, since it helps with healing...

Well, 26 days of healing - thats quite a lot, right? Please tell me it is! Tell me that everything is going to be alright... I will look normal again...

Down

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26 days is a ton of time for your skin to heal! Have you tried using Neosporin or Polysporin on the places where you picked? Whenever I would pick, neosporin would seem to help my skin heal faster.

Let this experience be a lesson to you. I know it's way, way, way easier said than done. But, you can learn to stop picking. It took me forever to learn. I guess I always thought that my skin looked terrible so it couldn't look any more terrible if I picked. But, that's totally wrong. For some reason, picking seems to make those problem areas of your face stick out even more.

We're all here to support you! Your skin is going to look amazing in 26 days!

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26 days is a ton of time for your skin to heal! Have you tried using Neosporin or Polysporin on the places where you picked? Whenever I would pick, neosporin would seem to help my skin heal faster.

Let this experience be a lesson to you. I know it's way, way, way easier said than done. But, you can learn to stop picking. It took me forever to learn. I guess I always thought that my skin looked terrible so it couldn't look any more terrible if I picked. But, that's totally wrong. For some reason, picking seems to make those problem areas of your face stick out even more.

We're all here to support you! Your skin is going to look amazing in 26 days!

Thanks, Sarah... Yeah, they do seem to stand out once they've been picked...

I've been applying a healing ointment for the last 2 days, but i'm going to try alternating between the 3 healing creams that I have - biafine, neosporin and sudocrem. They do seem to be healing... hopefully, next week won't be so terrible and by 5-7 days they will heal...

My family is coming in 26 days, I have to heal...

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The Freak Does It Again...

I'm not even goin to start about what day it is...

I am hopeless and helpless, thats what I am... My face was looking better and better... Even the terrible cyst that I've picked has been healing...

And then when washing my face, I felt a new clogged pore rising out of my chin... So I picked it, carefully, I must really stress CAREFULLY... so its been ok for a few days...

And today I've noticed that when I put moisturizer on that spot, it burns... And its red... I did put sulfur on it last night, maybe it burned me... so then I went to pick at it more, wanted to get rid of the dry skin that was peeling... Well, should I even tell you that it got worse? i have a date in 5 mins... I put on makeup the best I could, but I still feel down... yes, i still have 20 days for everythin to heal,...

And then I got so upset with picking my chin that I picked 2 clogged pores on my forehead - the last 2 clogged pores that were really pushing out... Got a lot of junk out of one of them (SUCCESS?) and then the other one just kind of got swollen... Biafine at night and neosporin should do the trick...

BUT WHY CAN"T I LEAVE MY SKIN ALONE? WHY CAN'T I JUST LET IT BE, LET IT HEAL? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY?

I hate myself as of right now... yesterday I was walking around the city without makeup and felt ok... of course, didn't look too good, but i felt ok...

I know accutane is going to work, but this whole "lets turn red every time you touch us" and "we're going to take forever to heal" is killing me... I just want to stay home all the time now..

I even got prescribed anti-anxiety pills to help me stop picking... I don't know what to do...

The usual "remember its best not to pick" doesn't work... what next?

Please someone reply, help me deal with this... I feel hideous... H-I-D-E-O-U-S...

off to my date...

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So I've created my first self-made cyst... I've picked at one of the spots too hard and it became a cyst... well, I'm glad there are those injections, but I'm trying to make it go down with eurythromycin (i'm sorry, I have no idea how to spell it), but its an antibiotic ointment...

One of the doctors that I saw abroad would use eurythromycin and apply it with an ultra sound device, so that the topical goes down deeper into the skin tissue... It worked miraculously for my cysts... they would disintegrate in like 2 days, like there was no sign of them... too bad I can't see her anymore, she's 13 hours of flying time away...

Anyways, I've decided to make this log not only an accutane log, but also a stop picking/start healing log...

First of all, I have gotten anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills from my psychiatrist.

Second, I'm going into therapy to break my picking habits for good

Third, I'm joining a support group for people who suffer from dermatillomania (compulsive skin picking) just like me...

Fourth, I'm NEVER going to pick again... NEVER!!!! I will resent myself if I do...

Finally, I have 19 days to heal the skin that I've picked... I'm assuming that pretty possible, since the big wound that I've made above my eyebrow wednesday night has been healing really well with me putting the healing ointment on it constantly... its getting smaller and smaller each day!!!!

So bare with me, here, friends!!! I'm trying to change my life for the better!!! And I think I'm on the right track!!!!!!

Otherwise, for the picked spots, skin is looking great!!!!

So to start out the new stop picking/start healing log... I have:

1) A healing wound above my eyebrow

2) A picked spot on my chin... I applied some sulfur to it and it burned the skin, so now thats regenerating... I actually don't know how that happened

3) Two picked spots on my right temple - one flat and one cyst that really hurts...

4) Two picked spots on my cheek ... kinda flat, but still red and visible...

So in total, I have to heal 6 spots!!!!

Please believe in me!!!

Katherine

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Hey Katherine!

I read your last couple of posts earlier, but I haven't been able to respond until now. I'm so ready for midterms to be over!

Anywho... I think it's a great idea to expand the topic of your log to skin picking. It's a problem that a lot of people on this board deal with. Though I'm much better about picking, I still fall prey sometimes. For example, today, I kept running my fingers over this really annoying whitehead today until the head finally just came off. In retrospect, I should have left it alone, but it happens.

The whole purpose of having a log is to share both your successes and setbacks. At first, I typed "successes and failures" but I decided that's too grim. Just because you pick when you know you shouldn't or for some reason have a random breakout, it doesn't make you any less of a person.

So, please, share with us your journey toward stopping picking and conquering acne. I'm sure there are tons of people out here on this forum and in the world that are having the same problems. But, you're like five miles ahead of them because you realize that picking is a problem for you and you're taking steps to correct that problem.

We're here to cheer with you when you meet success. And, we're also here to cheer you up during times of setbacks. Either way, we're here for you. Please, never forget that.

In the past few weeks, I've noticed that you seem to have a lovely, optimistic side of you peeking out. Even though you've had a few setbacks, you're able to see things in your skin that you like. This makes me so happy. I believe that we really start to see a change in our skin when we start to love our skin. Of course, this love usually starts out as a "I don't hate my skin as much as I did yesterday..." sort of thing. But, at some point in time that's hard to pinpoint, we do start to love our skin.

Friend, I truly do believe that you are back on the road to loving your skin. The more you start to love your skin, the less you will obsess over it. Then, time will fly by much faster, and pretty soon your skin is going to be flawless.

So, stay strong, don't pick, and let your skin heal. You have such beautiful skin waiting to be shown off. You can do this. Don't let minor setbacks discourage you. They're all a part of the journey towards clear skin!

I believe in you and so do tons of other people here.

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Good to hear that you are moving right along with your accutane regimen! Things will get better. I am proud of you for sticking to it so far, and getting through it :)

Picking. UGH!

The secret to picking is that its more of a nervous habit than an acne issue.

So you have to find the trigger (usually stress) and avoid the habit, distract yourself, and change the habit. Replace it with something healthy.

What i had to do to prevent myself from picking Waaaaaaaa :(

1) remove any "picking mirrors" (until you break the habit) you know those mirrors that magnify your pores, or those mirrors you go to the most to pick.

2) do something with your hands when you feel the urge to pick. I painted my nails. I had the best damn mani-pedi in town!

3) Cover your skin with moisturizer, instead of picking. It may be "itchy" because your skin is tight, dry, from the accutane. But instead of picking at it, try covering the spots with a thick moisturizer. In the morning, maybe it will clear up, redness and swelling go down.

4) cover with a band-aid or with a green mask. Create a barrier for yourself.

5) read a magazine. a book, type on your blog, keep your hands occupied.

It takes 14 days to break a habit. Good luck! you can do it :)

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Hey I think I speak for everyone on the logs that WE BELIEVE IN YOU!

I think you should be exceptionally proud of yourself for taking control of the situation and

finding a working solution for yourself! Your strong and you should know that! Not many

people could search out all the help they would need to get their picking under control so

huge KUDOS to you lol.

I just wanted to give you a couple helpful hints I used for quick healing on the tane!

1. If your not already doing it start taking Vitamine E and if you can a B complex

- the E improves healing, and the B i found helped with my mood and when I was happy I didn't pick :)

The E works really awesome if you put it on your lesions to heal them quicker too!

2. OMEGA 3-6-9 - when I took this my skin felt a lot more hydrated. My number one reason for picking was when I felt bumps or dry skin on my face. The more hydrated your skin the faster the turnover of cells and you'll have less of an urge to pick because you'll feel smoother.

3. WATER - if you can increase your water intake as much as you can and keep yourself very hydrated again this helps skin cell turn over, decreases scars and makes your skin smoother!

4. Working Out - this part kind of sucks (at least if you hate cardio like i do) but I found the more I went to the gym and worked out until I was red in the face (literally), my skin actually improved. Assuming your keeping hydrated, when you work out you not only sweat out crap in your face but more blood is drawn to the skin in your face and therefore you get an increase in oxygen as well. This extra oxygen helps your skin heal and turn over!

5. SLEEP - sounds stupid but the closer you can get to 8 hrs of sleep the faster my skin healed.

Finally, Kinerase - Scar Therapy for your scars afterwards!

Good luck !!! I hope everything works out for you!

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Day 65

I had my end of month 2 appointment with my derm last tuesday... She was happy with the way I was looking, even though I wasn't exactly satisfied...

I know that I'm not even halfway through the course yet... Its funny how we want so much in so little time..

She said that 2 months isn't enough time for accutane to do everything that is expected of it... She said that yes she has seen people that had to do multiple treatments, but they didn't have my type of acne - aka mild - they had severe cystic acne... Did that make me happy? I guess...

On Friday I saw my esthetician, she extracted 3 clogged pores from my chin... Now they are just marks that are to be added to the rest of the marks that I have on my face...

I have noticed that I have pits from the places where my cysts were injected... I was told that they fill up... if not, i will get fillers for them..

As of a few days ago, I noticed 3 little pimples on the sides of my neck... 2 of them are about the size of a little nailhead, whereas 1 more is as tiny as a needle head... went to the derm today, she injected one of them since it was starting to hurt... she other she said just to spot treat and that it should be fine by Thursday...

I know that I'm not even half way through the course yet, I do not have active acne (knock on wood), I have at most 2 more tiny bumps that only I can feel - i did scratch one in the shower, so now its all red and scabby and noticeable...

I'm really scared to put liquid foundation on, even though I really want to ... I want to see myself pretty, I want to feel pretty... i want to be ALIVE again...

I was leaving work and I saw a lady from my office... She's great, has a great personality... but what i noticed was that she had really large acne on her chest and on the side of her neck... and you know what? she still wore a deep cut blouse and she didn't give a damn about it...

why can't i do that? why am i so self-conscious of things people can hardly see? sometimes I'm so scared I wake up in the middle of the night...

Please tell me this will be over... please... I'm so close, yet so far... I have about 3-4 months to go on this medication and I know that everything will be great - considering that I've had such great results over 2 months...

I'm just so tired of worrying and being ashamed of myself...

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So now I know what they say that accutane pushes "EVERYTHING" out!!

Basically, here's a quick story... I had a clogged pore in my cheek about a month ago... My esthetician extracted it, but I always had the impression that she didn't get all of it, that the "seed" stayed inside...

So I picked at it a month ago, the skin pulled back together and I thought that was the end of that... Well, little did I know, that a month later that clogged oil, which now turned into this pressurized clay-like hard sesame seed-like structure decided to push itself out...

Basically, I had a pimple, and of course, I took tweezers and pulled it out... Actually, I pulled 2 of those things out...

So that should be the end of that... OF course, now I have a red picked spot, but hopefully its the last one there...

how is everyone else doing?

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Hey there,

Just wanted to drop in to see how everything was going. It's been a while since i've been on here hahaha.. no one really writes in my log anyways because i don't update it as frequent i guess. Month 3 almost? Nice.... I'll be heading into my 7th month in May and ill be finished. Can't wait!

Take care

Edited by keiko1
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Hey there,

Just wanted to drop in to see how everything was going. It's been a while since i've been on here hahaha.. no one really writes in my log anyways because i don't update it as frequent i guess. Month 3 almost? Nice.... I'll be heading into my 7th month in May and ill be finished. Can't wait!

Take care

Hey! Thanks for posting! I'm pretty much ok, pretty much acne free... For the time being... There are still a few things that worry me, like one clogged pore on my chin that seems to be pushing out... Again, I can only see it if I stretch the skin with my tongue... and then I picked one zit on my eyebrow, so thats red, but healing..

I think I'm gonna do 6 or 7 months too, regardless of what the doctor says really... I've got enough pills from Europe... I'm sure as hell I'm going to take care of all of this...

I've stopped wearing makeup completely, my stops (PIH) are disappearing...

How r u doing?

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Hey there,

Just wanted to drop in to see how everything was going. It's been a while since i've been on here hahaha.. no one really writes in my log anyways because i don't update it as frequent i guess. Month 3 almost? Nice.... I'll be heading into my 7th month in May and ill be finished. Can't wait!

Take care

Hey! Thanks for posting! I'm pretty much ok, pretty much acne free... For the time being... There are still a few things that worry me, like one clogged pore on my chin that seems to be pushing out... Again, I can only see it if I stretch the skin with my tongue... and then I picked one zit on my eyebrow, so thats red, but healing..

I think I'm gonna do 6 or 7 months too, regardless of what the doctor says really... I've got enough pills from Europe... I'm sure as hell I'm going to take care of all of this...

I've stopped wearing makeup completely, my stops (PIH) are disappearing...

How r u doing?

I've been doing really well. I've been pimple free for about 2 months or so. I get the odd small one but it goes away within a day, maybe even hours its redic. ^^

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So DAY 89...

So skinwise, I have 2 clogged pores on my chin - one right under my lip (which you can't see unless I stretch my skin) and the other - redder and bumpier - off to the side of the chin ...

So going to put either isotrexin (topical isotretinoin and erythromycin) or differin on it tonight, shoudl help...

If not, have a facial on wednesday, will try it then or just going to get a shot for it...

Other than that, I have a picked spot healing on my eyebrow...

Still staying on 60, the doctor is happy with the results, I am also, if only I didn't find this active off to the side of my chin just an hour ago...

Pimples now seem to appear faster and go away much faster... So i'm hoping it will be gone in like a few days...

How is everyone else doing?

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So DAY 89...

So skinwise, I have 2 clogged pores on my chin - one right under my lip (which you can't see unless I stretch my skin) and the other - redder and bumpier - off to the side of the chin ...

So going to put either isotrexin (topical isotretinoin and erythromycin) or differin on it tonight, shoudl help...

If not, have a facial on wednesday, will try it then or just going to get a shot for it...

Other than that, I have a picked spot healing on my eyebrow...

Still staying on 60, the doctor is happy with the results, I am also, if only I didn't find this active off to the side of my chin just an hour ago...

Pimples now seem to appear faster and go away much faster... So i'm hoping it will be gone in like a few days...

How is everyone else doing?

Everything will clear up real soon (meaning those clogged pores). It was around the end of the third/middle of the 4th month i really saw good improvement. Your getting closer and closer :D

take it easy

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So DAY 89...

So skinwise, I have 2 clogged pores on my chin - one right under my lip (which you can't see unless I stretch my skin) and the other - redder and bumpier - off to the side of the chin ...

So going to put either isotrexin (topical isotretinoin and erythromycin) or differin on it tonight, shoudl help...

If not, have a facial on wednesday, will try it then or just going to get a shot for it...

Other than that, I have a picked spot healing on my eyebrow...

Still staying on 60, the doctor is happy with the results, I am also, if only I didn't find this active off to the side of my chin just an hour ago...

Pimples now seem to appear faster and go away much faster... So i'm hoping it will be gone in like a few days...

How is everyone else doing?

Everything will clear up real soon (meaning those clogged pores). It was around the end of the third/middle of the 4th month i really saw good improvement. Your getting closer and closer :D

take it easy

No, I mean don't get me wrong, going on accutane was a great and smart decision. Its just that now whenever I see some unevenness in my skin texture or just redness from the PIH, it really gets me down, since my face is really really nice... I'm loving it!

So I decided to spot treat those clogged pores in the hope that they would dry out... Ummm, so I washed my face and now that whole area is red... geez, people are going to think I got sunburned again... Uhhhh

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Day 97...

I had a huge fight with my parents and the next thing I did after being EXTREMELY upset - I picked my face... My absolutely clear face (with one clogged pore that can't be seen)... So now my nose looks like I have a big red freckle... The wound is superficial so it won't be as red in the next week or so...

The problem is - my chest is breaking out... Not severly, but in small ones... I get a new one everyday even if it goes away really really quickly (in a day or two)...

What am I doing wrong? Is this due to the fact that I forget to moisturize my chest after showering? Or am I unlucky in that I will not have a clear chest? I mean these small pimples - they are virtually invisible, its just that I see them... Its like i'm fixed on finding something...

I just want to relax, to live easily and happily... I need to cut down on stress somehow.. I am going to the doctor right now to show her everything, since as of right now, I'm upset and I'm so not a happy camper...

Did anyone experience this this far into the course? i've just started my fourth month, so I am just halfway through, but still... its upsetting...

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Day 99:

So I'm over 100 days... Things are going pretty well, I think...

One of the 2 clogged pores that I was talking about in my last couple of posts got inflamed and decided to hurt... It was right between my nose and my eyebrow (closer to the latter), so it really hurt due to the number of nerves that are located in the eyebrows....

Went to my esthetician this morning, she squeezed it out and then I had the nurse give me a steroid shot into that place, so that the inflammation would go down. Also the esthetician tried to extract another pore that I didn't like - well let me tell u, that didn't necessarily work, so the only thing that she did was take off the skin... so that are is really raw now... Got a shot into that place as well... Anyways, the pain is down sufficiently just an hour later, so thats good...

For the next couple of days, I will have to walk around with biafine (the healing ointment that I have and love using) to heal all the places... But it should be much better already tmr morning...

Overall, I'm really happy I went on accutane... If only my skin would heal as fast as it would normally... These two things combined would be absolutely perfect... But I still have about 50 days on the med, plus my own 45 days, so I have more than 3 months to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Edited by Katushkinz
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Hmmm I do the same exact thing. I love biafine and I just rap it on an area and walk around with it on. Hahha. H let it soak in.

Yeah, thats exactly what I do... Sometimes I also feel like it helps more when you put it right before bed and keep it throughout the night... The next morning the redness is less obvious...

I came home and looked in the mirror... Well, didn't have pleasant words to say to the esthetician, my chin looks bad... Called the nurse crying - she assured me that everything will heal and will be fine - on condition that I don't pick and keep biafine on there...

Just found out that one of my friends took accutane a few years ago and also went through facials, had the exact same things happen... So she's making me more confident that I will get through all of this...

Right now I just don't feel so good... Right now I relaly want to break down and cry... But stress doesn't help anything, does it? No, it doesn't.. makes it worse... So i'm off to write my paper and then to watch TV, having ordered dinner, since cooking today is not an option... Don't really wanna wash my face tonight to expose all the redness again, but I guess I'll have to... And then plop biafine on top of everything again and hope that by tmr it looks a little less red, no more tenderness, no more being puffy... just normal skin... clean face..

Oh, God, please!

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