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Just thought I would post what Ive been feeling recently and to see if anyone else is feeling the same.

I've had 10 years of constant acne, not too extreme - but very noticeable. All my family and friends have immaculate skin, like a celeb - flawless skin, which makes things 1000X worse.

Even though some of you may disagree that my skin is awful when you see it constantly everyday and have it in your head that your skin is vile thats all you do see. Like I am sure some of you agree with, someone may think you look good - but when you see yourself day in, day out - it just gets so depressing.

I used to be able to go out all the time, see friends, family, meet new people and just in general be so confident and welcomed people involving me in a conversation. But Since I've had my random bursts of acne I just shy away, pray in my head that no one causes a scene, no one will bring attention to me or just look at me. I hate it when people just stare at my skin like its moving/growing infront of them and are sickened by it.

If i do pluck up the courage to go out, I make sure that its dark or the lighting isn't bright. I have a bathroom in my bedroom and I cant even switch the light on because the light is so bright it just depresses me so brushing my teeth, washing my face, showering etc is all done in the dark.

This is just a segment of it all. Of course I could type millions more about how i feel and stuff but I want to hear from you guys. Do you feel the same? How do you deal with it? I was thinking of maybe seeking counciling but is that too extreme?

Thanks guys.

G.

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Ugh I know how you feel. I never hardly go out because all i want to do is stay home and take care of my skin. Every night i pray for everyones acne to go away. (including mine, tbh especially mine) :C

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Yeah, man... I do the same stuff. I actually use one of those heat lamps that's built into the bathroom ceiling (has a red glow) as a light replacement for the -exact- same reason. Oh, and you are definitely not alone.. just go read my thread in the emotional section.

tldr: I control nearly every aspect of my life because of... you guessed it: my acne

Edited by Mirrfiak

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That sounds like me word for word. Lately, I just can't handle it like I used to. I am now seeing two different therapists and trying to work through it and get my life back. It helps, but it's a difficult process.

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i feel just like running to you and giving you a hug.i know how it feels to have acne so bad you avoid mirrors because you're scared of what you see.i know people will look at you differently,like you have a cancer or HIV or something just because you have acne.everybody gets acne.some people have already passed that stage,some people get it in places that are not prominent,and some people will get it in the future.acne will pass,i know it will.i think you should definitely go see a psychologist if you feel that acne has destroyed your self-esteem.it will go away.acne will go away.please cheer up :]

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Absolutely recognizable. It's not a bad idea to install some kind of a 'flattering light' in your bathroom instead of darkness. I have actually spent years with it and I'm all about tricking myself into thinking my acne isn't that bad. I'm not in denial, just trying to avoid feeling depressed and obsessed. Also, and I know this is a cliche but its true, remember the way that you observe and scrutinize yourself isn't the way other people look at you.

For you it may seem that people are sickened by the sight of you, but <without knowing anything about your environment obviously> I doubt this is true. I myself have never looked at a person with a skin disorder that way. Sure, I notice it, and empathize with it probably, but I never found myself counting spots on someone's face.

I know this is not much help to you but it's good to sometimes realize that your own mind is pulling tricks on you all the time.

I think it's definitely a good idea to seek help in the mental department if you feel you're completely crippled by your acne.

If you are often confronted with your skin by people in an uncomfortable way, that may also be something worth talking about with a professional. You can usually get easy access to a psychologist through your GP and noone has to find out. Feels like a big leap to take, but talking about it helps.

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Absolutely recognizable. It's not a bad idea to install some kind of a 'flattering light' in your bathroom instead of darkness. I have actually spent years with it and I'm all about tricking myself into thinking my acne isn't that bad. I'm not in denial, just trying to avoid feeling depressed and obsessed. Also, and I know this is a cliche but its true, remember the way that you observe and scrutinize yourself isn't the way other people look at you.

For you it may seem that people are sickened by the sight of you, but <without knowing anything about your environment obviously> I doubt this is true. I myself have never looked at a person with a skin disorder that way. Sure, I notice it, and empathize with it probably, but I never found myself counting spots on someone's face.

I know this is not much help to you but it's good to sometimes realize that your own mind is pulling tricks on you all the time.

I think it's definitely a good idea to seek help in the mental department if you feel you're completely crippled by your acne.

If you are often confronted with your skin by people in an uncomfortable way, that may also be something worth talking about with a professional. You can usually get easy access to a psychologist through your GP and noone has to find out. Feels like a big leap to take, but talking about it helps.

Hey thanks so much for your reply. It really made me sit up and listen!

I completely agree with you about the mind playing tricks on you but its so hard when people just stare at your skin you know? lol

Also how do you trick yourself into thinking your skin isn't so bad? Dont you see your reflection in a shop mirror by accident and just want to get home as soon as possible?

I personally agree and think i should probably see a psychologist, its not just the physical aspect but more of the emotional and psychological part that has recked me.

Im sure everyone on this site can relate with what I and others are feeling, lights off or on dim, hoods up, in our rooms, spending money we dont have on creams, lotions etc, and just destroying our teenage years.

Thanks again mate, you speak alot of sense! I hope your acne is under control btw.

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I know exactly how you feel. There are some days I really just don't want to go out because I look so terrible. I try to boost my self-esteem, but it's so hard. I see myself in the mirror and think, "God my face looks so terrible. I wish I could wear a bag over my head!" Honestly lately, I've gotten so sick of being depressed about it. What can I do about it? Acne is a long process of fixing. It can't go away overnight. I just deal with it. I tell myself all the time that I'm trying to fix it. My face is a work in progress.

If people want to judge me because of my acne, then screw them I don't need people that shallow in my life. Have faith that you WILL find something that works for you and will help you to be acne free. It's easy for me to say this because I've only had acne for the last 3 years, but I have to keep a positive attitude about it, because being depressed about it will get me nowhere.

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hey man.. i'm pretty new to this board, but i can definitely relate to what you're going through. i think if your acne is bothering you to that extent, you should certainly consider talking to someone about it - there's definitely no shame in it. always remember too that your skin will look worse to you than it does to others :)

i notice you're from the uk... i'm sure you've probably thought about it, but if you're still suffering active acne, have you considered going on accutane? i went on it when i was 18 on the nhs and it worked so great for me. I didn't suffer any side effects and now (at 24) haven't ever had a spot since. In fact, people never believe me when I tell them I used to have terrible acne :)

so hang in there and don't be too hard on yourself - things will get better i'm sure :)

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hey man.. i'm pretty new to this board, but i can definitely relate to what you're going through. i think if your acne is bothering you to that extent, you should certainly consider talking to someone about it - there's definitely no shame in it. always remember too that your skin will look worse to you than it does to others :)

i notice you're from the uk... i'm sure you've probably thought about it, but if you're still suffering active acne, have you considered going on accutane? i went on it when i was 18 on the nhs and it worked so great for me. I didn't suffer any side effects and now (at 24) haven't ever had a spot since. In fact, people never believe me when I tell them I used to have terrible acne :)

so hang in there and don't be too hard on yourself - things will get better i'm sure :)

Thank you for your reply dude, means alot.

Is accutane that drug that you have to wait months for the hospital to see you, and if you get put on it, it can make your lips dry, make your mood swing, make you depressed etc?

If that is it, I had it about 4 years ago, and it worked a treat but i still have spots after finishing my dosage. I asked my GP if i could go back there and he said that they wouldn't give me it because its not that bad YET. hmmm

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hey man.. i'm pretty new to this board, but i can definitely relate to what you're going through. i think if your acne is bothering you to that extent, you should certainly consider talking to someone about it - there's definitely no shame in it. always remember too that your skin will look worse to you than it does to others :)

i notice you're from the uk... i'm sure you've probably thought about it, but if you're still suffering active acne, have you considered going on accutane? i went on it when i was 18 on the nhs and it worked so great for me. I didn't suffer any side effects and now (at 24) haven't ever had a spot since. In fact, people never believe me when I tell them I used to have terrible acne :)

so hang in there and don't be too hard on yourself - things will get better i'm sure :)

Thank you for your reply dude, means alot.

Is accutane that drug that you have to wait months for the hospital to see you, and if you get put on it, it can make your lips dry, make your mood swing, make you depressed etc?

If that is it, I had it about 4 years ago, and it worked a treat but i still have spots after finishing my dosage. I asked my GP if i could go back there and he said that they wouldn't give me it because its not that bad YET. hmmm

hey - yeah, that sounds like accutane! fortunately i didn't suffer any depression while i was on it although i do remember my lips being super dry (small price to pay for the clear skin that followed tho!). i only needed one treatment to clear up my acne, but my sister went on it twice as the first time didn't totally clear hers. neither of us have any acne at all any more, so it maybe worth talking to your doctor about going on it again? i know that it's a pretty expensive drug and the nhs can be picky about putting people on it, but maybe if you were to have an honest conversation with your doctor describing how much it's effecting you emotionally - they may be more willing to help out?

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