Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...

Recommended Posts

That's basically my story. I thought that once I rid of my acne everything would turn for the better. Yet, the clearer my skin got the more insecure I became. The physical flaws that I've ignored because I had acne came surging back in my mind. Being bombarded by images of flawless, beautiful women in magazines made me more insecure about myself. I started diverting my attention to my facial features instead of my skin. That I would look better if I had a pointer nose, straighter teeth, bigger eyes etc.

I also thought that I would become a social butterfly once I'm clear. That never happened. I still suffer from social anxiety and bouts of depression. I always think that people are talking about me behind my back. A small sound of laughter or whisper from someone would send me into a spiral of questions. "Is she laughing at me? Why did she look at me, then whisper something in her friend's ear? They must be talking about how I'm the ugliest person they've ever encountered in their life."

When I receive compliments from others I automatically think they're lying to make me feel better. Sometimes I even cry because I don't believe a word they say. There are days when I just cry for no reason.

Is anyone going through the same problem?

Edited by Anta
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My skin is not clear, but I have this problem also. I work at a behind the counter job, and last night these two girls came in and they were laughing at me and mocking me for no reason, I'd never seen them before. People always seem to have a problem with me, and I don't know why. I just come in to do my job. I've been working there four years now. I just try to ignore them I don't know what else to do.

I don't have any friends or allies, I live alone, all my relatives live far away, but I prefer it this way b/c I can't relate to the human race.

Edited by srotriya
Link to comment
Share on other sites

For the most part I can relate 100% to this, and I think you'll find that a lot of people do too. When I am clear, my emotional scars still exist as well, and I too have the tendency to then focus my attention elsewhere be it my facial features or body to be unhappy with. I think it is just the obsessiveness we had with our skin and the old habits of hating one part of ourselves that still remain. I am also TERRIBLE with compliments, I always think someone has an ulterior agenda! I really believe acne has the potential to leave a deep, painful, lasting impression on people.. so don't think you're a weirdo for this. Have you thought about talking to someone to help better your self image? I think it makes sense that it will take practice and time to undo those old ways of thinking/looking at yourself to rebuild a positive (and accurate!) self perception. I have talked to a counselor and found it really helpful myself. You deserve to be happy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My skin is not clear, but I have this problem also. I work at a behind the counter job, and last night these two girls came in and they were laughing at me and mocking me for no reason, I'd never seen them before. People always seem to have a problem with me, and I don't know why. I just come in to do my job. I've been working there four years now. I just try to ignore them I don't know what else to do.

I don't have any friends or allies, I live alone, all my relatives live far away, but I prefer it this way b/c I can't relate to the human race.

you cane relate to me...i understand what your going through trust me

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oh yeah - I can totally relate. I think it's just embedded in our heads, because we've had acne for so long, so we think that there's still something wrong with our faces. I can never take a compliment. I always think people are complimenting me because they feel sorry for me or something.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anta, PLEASE realize that all of the pictures you see in magazines ARE NOT REAL! There is so much altering involved. Oh gosh. You've got to know this, right? I do know what you're going through and can relate, but unless you get a grip on how you really are then perhaps you need some professional help relating to body dysmorphic disorder. I'm not saying that to be cruel. I'm not making light or fun. BDD is real and many acne (and post) sufferers have this disorder. We've focused on acne for so long that once it's gone, we must pick something else that we think makes us "not perfect". You are who you are. Who are you trying to impress? Everybody? Not going to happen. Impress yourself. You are who matters.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yeah, I can totally relate to this and I feel horrible about it! Even though I'm currently clear, I'm still so self-conscious and I take compliments like they're all backhanded lies to make me feel better about myself. I've heard that I'm cute from alot of people in my lifetime, even when I had my worst acne, and I just think it's all lies because it doesn't match how I feel about myself.

In all honesty I know that I'm probably looking my best right now in terms of having almost no acne, red marks or scarring on my face, but I still feel so self-conscious. After dealing with acne for 10+ years it's kinda hard to just snap out of it and enjoy life like a regular person. Those dark days really shape who you are and make you so self-aware of you and your surroundings. I see people who chase after me now, hotties, and I'm almost disgusted because it's terrible how superficial our society is. Yet we're all aware of the problem. I keep thinking "would this person still want me if they saw me a year ago with acne?" But what can you do?

In the end I know that acne has made me a more compassionate person and I'm so grateful that I was able to get through it relatively well. But at the same time it's shaped my mindframe so much that even though I can fit right into regular society again and even play the dating game pretty damn well, I'm humble because I know how it feels to have eveything in your life shattered by acne. And because we all know how unpredictable acne can be, I just keep praying that it never comes back. I've learned my lessons from acne! Now I just need to learn how to readjust myself and move on with life, and enjoy my clear skin.. Easier said than done!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm 90% clear after years of bad acne....I'm still depress....I'm still very anti social....I get compliments from pretty females and I also think they are lying to me....

its a very difficult transition...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can't relate since I still have acne... but I can definitely picture it. It's a mountain after another to get over... but you can do it. When you hear a negative thought going in your head, stop it! Instead of "... wow... I'm such a failure, I was made to fail..." think "No, that's not true. I got over my acne, it's in the past. I've achieved what I wanted to achieve for a long time. It's finally here. Time to celebrate!"

I think you've disarmed yourself a bit too much. Stress will always be there in life, there will always be factors there to drag you down. Socialize, exercise, eat healthy, do stress relieving exercises like deep breathing and meditation, follow up with your interests, do things you've always wanted to do, and be happy when you can. Don't let yourself be the one standing in the way of your own happiness.

That's easier said than done of course... but it can be done. There are always possibilities. Hang in there, I hope you feel better soon. Without sadness there cannot be happiness in any form=)

Edited by Holding.On
Link to comment
Share on other sites

This rings true for me as well. When I'm having a clear patch I will start the day off feeling good about the way I look in the mirror, but if anyone gives me a sideways glance or whispers to their friend, I assume its something awful about me. :shifty: By the end of the day I feel the same as if I was breaking out really bad.

People (myself included) promise themselves that they start living their lives once they are clear, but being clear does not neccessarily make things any easier. Better to just start living your life right now.

Edited by doublehawk
Link to comment
Share on other sites

This rings true for me as well. When I'm having a clear patch I will start the day off feeling good about the way I look in the mirror, but if anyone gives me a sideways glance or whispers to their friend, I assume its something awful about me. :shifty: By the end of the day I feel the same as if I was breaking out really bad.

People (myself included) promise themselves that they start living their lives once they are clear, but being clear does not neccessarily make things any easier. Better to just start living your life right now.

Beautiful. I agree... we all gotta move on with life. It's gonna be hard, but life's meant to be lived. We've experienced the harshness, we're ready for the good times so let it roll. Cheers =)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Stop worrying and start living. People don't live thinking and laughing about your face. Everybody has problems, physical or emotional. Just survive, live and try the best to be happy in your media .. that the quest of every one of us. :angel:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi TS,

I suddenly have been able to relate exactely to each and every word you are saying here.

Yes, there's nothing to hide, after using honey on my face, even myself cant believe my skin clear up so well. Guess what, i even use make up remover 2 more times to ensure its not my leftover powder doing the trick, all my acne flattened, scare lighten. After months of physical, mental and emotional torturement, it had finally come to an end.. eh wait or is it really?

Yes like your thread title, clear skin yet insecure. Nobody except us could relate to this horrible feelings. On-going torture and aftermath phobia. I am really happy and slight confident this 2 days. But same time constantly looking at mirror to see if there is any acne coming out. Yes i feel better, but there isnt a moment my mind cant be put off from this horror. Yesterday i dosed off as i was too tired (1st day of period), damn i wake up suddenly ard 1 am plus, and what i realised next was "oh shit i didnt put on my honey to sleep". Yes i could easily go to kitchen to apply if i want to, but i know this sounds stupid but i am scare of darkness/ ghost, okay whatever you think i know it really sounds silly. But my main point here is that even i wake up so nervously it was also becos i fear just one night without honey new pimple will destory my current clean face.

Speaking about we THOUGHT that we could become a better person. I never thought iw ould failed to do that even i am totally cured from acne, but since you mentioned that, i imgaine myself in your situation. No, maybe i cant even ever but CURED, physically-face skin wise maybe yes if i am finanically stable one day, but my emotionally and mentally left a scar.

I refuse to be any sociable. I have no problems talking, initating talks or whatever, making friends is no problem for me, but speaking about hanging out and going out often even with clickies i cant.

I tell myself this, less interaction = less hurt.

I cant even tolerate the slightless hurt.

You say about my features i am gone.

I hate the way people have to give opinion about how i look, hey did anybody on earth ask you about that? Cant you have a better life without putting people down?

Some people just doesnt have a mirror to reflect they arent any better to critisize.

Maybe thats the only way to boost their pathetic esteem.

At least mine arent that bad that i need to kill ppl's to benefit mine.

How shallow, how funny that is. hahaha lol!

Now that i am kinda of waiting and watching when will be my next pimple that would want to appear. I still cant believe i would have such a luck. Speaking about going out with friends, i feel much better at home cos i dont have to constantly worry how sales assistant would think i am incapable of purchasing their so-high-quality-clothes and constantly feeling inferior i cant dress as revealing as my frens.

It will never stop.

IF only i have money to laser every shit off my skin. :'(

Sorry for such long post.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes


×