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So I got accepted into UIC and I had to move out on my own to Chicago. It's been really stressful/exciting and I've been working really hard to convince myself that i look good despite a few marks. Well anyway, my father was helping me move some stuff to my apartment yesterday and out of NOWHERE he asks, "So umm did you run out of your acne medication?" It REALLY hurt my feelings because I only had about 4 or 5 pimples and a little scarring. Just before he said that, I was feeling really good about myself.

I was trapped in the car with him and I didn't want him to see me crying. So I just kind of turned on my side and pretended to go to sleep. I've been crying ever since. This is the only place that I felt I could talk about it. I don't talk to any of my friends about my acne cause I'm waaay too embarrassed. Any words of inspiration would really help me right now....

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Well I never really thought my skin was really bad.... but comments like that hurt no matter how severe your acne is (Especially when it's coming from a parent). It was just mean.

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Maybe your father didnt mean it that way?

He could just be thinking of you and making sure you are ok that you have everything you want.

You are moving away after all.

He might just want to feel like he can help you.

Look at in the way he is thinking about you and it would be much worse if he didn't care.

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Maybe your father didnt mean it that way?

He could just be thinking of you and making sure you are ok that you have everything you want.

You are moving away after all.

He might just want to feel like he can help you.

Look at in the way he is thinking about you and it would be much worse if he didn't care.

Well the reason I'm so upset is because I honestly thought my skin looked fine.I was feeling really good. I've been around him at times when my skin was waaaaaay worse. And for him to say that made me feel awful. Tears started building up in my eyes instantly.

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I see!!

I know how you feel I've felt the exact same!!

But as you said you only have a few pimples so he could just be asking do you have any medication left to just see if you had any left.

He might want to make sure you have everything you need and to make a malicious comment!

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i agree with adam on this one

i can see how u felt down about the comment, but i dont think he meant anything by it. seeing as how he probably see's you everyday, he knows your struggles, and just wants to help.

in my experience, people that have never had acne are usually more straight forward about these things. but thats expected, and its nothing to get down about.

plus, your skin is beautiful, you have nothing at all to worry about!

just be happy you dont look like me D:

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I wouldn't overinterpret your dad's comments. Like others have suggested, how you perceived it might not be what he really meant.

BTW - I am UIC alumni. :) Hope you enjoy your experience there, I know I did!!

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Guest Chrisâ„¢

At least you have a father, haha.

For real.

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your dad loves you, he just wants to make sure you keep up the progress.

Maybe he thought you've run out since your skin is looking so much better that you must have used it all.

That's the thought process i would go through

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I know it sucks, but your pop loves you and most likely had no intention of hurting your feelings. Sometimes people (especially parents) can be be extremely naive to our feelings. Like you said, "idiots". lol

So don't let this discourage you. I know that you might be sick of hearing the "my horse is bigger than yours", but I just want you to know that I'm extremely jealous of you because you don't have bad acne. Not only do I have acne on my face, but also on my chest, upper arms, back, shoulders, butt, thighs, and legs.

Everybody has the right to feel crappy about their acne, no matter what the severity of it is. If you are ever at a low point, though, and think your life sucks, just think of khagema1, and how she can't even wear dresses anymore because of her acne.

That should bring a bit of a smile to your pretty face. lol

Edited by khagema1
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Aww, don't worry about it. My father lives out of the country and he only visits once or twice a year. One of these times was when my acne was really bad and when he saw me, he was all "With the bad acne and the dark circles... the problems just keep adding up." (Well, the rough translation of what he meant. He said it in Chinese.) in an exasperated tone. And I cried for the rest of the day.

Sometimes your parents can seem like the most insensitive people in the world but they want the best for their kids and it's hard for them to see us go through our early years this way.

Edited by simplicate
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Hon, dads have a really hard time communicating exactly what they mean at times. He probably was concerned that you needed money and were skimping on your purchases. (Trust me on this one.)

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Criticism hurts 10x worse coming from someone we love. It really does strike such a harder blow.

If it was a stranger who said that to me, depending on what mood I'm in, I would have a) punched their teeth in or b) walked away & ignored it. Either way, it wouldn't have much effect on me.

Now, coming from a parent, you HAVE to chose b... this is especially hard to do while it hurts that much at the same time.

:comfort: I feel ya. My parents talk like that alll the time, not only about acne, but among other things. It really does hurt and I guess the best thing you can do is tell them. Unless they're like mine and do it regardless thinking they're funny. :doubt:

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I know he didn't mean to hurt you, he just wants to see you continue to clear up and be happy. My dad, about two weeks ago, did almost the same thing to me. He said: "That doxycycline ain't doing such a good job anymore, is it?"

"Ain't." You've got to love the south!

Anyway, a few days later he was amazed by how much my skin had cleared up, and how quickly. The only reason he said that was because he wants something to WORK for me, because he knows that it bothers me, and he doesn't want it to continue to repress me.

I think that's how most fathers are. If he actually wanted to hurt you or meant to, he would've said something much worse. If he knew it would hurt you so badly, he probably wouldn't have said anything at all.

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