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fel_han

Back on roaccutane, 20mg per week.....(with pics)

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Pics this week

*EDIT*: Refer to pg 8 for pics.

Not too good... been getting couple of red bumps n spots at both sides of my face..

peeps.. i dont know y.. i feel very restless.. lots of things happening this week.. i feel so lack of energy n motivation now..................

Edited by fel_han
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Hey!

I feel like that too! I almost feel like it's the meds a bit :P But I think you'r looking great the few extra red spots are probably the last of your skin's purging of clogged pores!

So cheer up you look beautiful!

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Skin Update: I think i'm still having some breakouts here and there. Its weird, i can have a few red bumps all at the same time.. after they go away.. another group would appear! Its so irritating! And i swear that they always appear during mid-day! Its like my skin is so smooth in the morning.. no cysts, no little bumps.. and then.. by mid-day... BAMM! What seems so perfect in the morning may not be so by the end of the day!! Gosh... this is killing me esp when i dont wear make up at all.. those red spots are soooo obvious! Plus, there is no way i can wear my foundation now since my skin is dry like crazy.....i would flake everytime i try to put on my foundation..

Side effects: Skin rash is making a comeback! Its on my hands, legs and arms.. And i think my hair is falling a little?? I hope i'm not being paraniod... *pray*

Im feeling quite negative for the past few days.. i dont know y... now im having doubts if i would ever recover.. would i?? feeling so sad.. so lack of motivation.. energy-deprived..

Im so tired of all that crap......... :(

sorry for all that.. i really need to vent it out.. i find it so hard to let people around me know what i'm going through.. even my boyfriend of 11 yrs cant really understand the fear & uncertainty i'm going through...

Edited by fel_han
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Hey!!

You are looking GREAT in your pics! You and your skin look beautiful!

don't worry about venting, thats what this site is for. :-)

20 mg sotret

35 year old woman

Edited by zucchini007
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missmooshoo007: Thanks so much.. too bad we dont have aquaphor here in singapore.. =( I'm using the moisturiser prescribed by my doc.. hope that the dryness would get better.. i really hate waking up with flaky skin...

Been telling myself not to get too stressed up with my erratic skin.. i think i just get too negative.. need to get to the brighter side!

Anyway... skin updates:

Day 105! (YAY!!)

I'm in the triple zone now!!! Wow.. it seems like just yesterday when i pop my 1st pill!

Skin update: No actives at the moment.. just some random red bumps below my left eye.. wonder whats that.. i always seem to be getting lil red bumps that comes n goes.. im starting to suspect it could be the vit K cream that im using for my dark eye rings =x

well... i guess not much to complain about since no actives is good.. just hope that it stays like this... *cross my fingers* *knocking on the hardest wood ever*!!! (i dont wanna jinx it if u know what i mean!!)

side effects: Other than the old side effects.. i think im beggining to feel like an old woman now?? Seriously... i get so tired even though i sleep about 9.30pm almost every night.. Now my shoulder aches so much.. i wish someone can be here now to massage my shoulders for me! Terrible terrible ache ='(

Ah… picture treat , look at my avatar… my forehead is so high.. I think I can literally use it as a writing board!! LOLLL

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Thanks Time_traveler & faithinhim!!

I think the pics look nicer than it is as compared to real life! But nevertheless.. I have to learn to be thankful for the little improvements along the way.. Hoping that this would continue!! :dance:

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Pics for Day 111

*EDIT*: Refer to pg 8 for pics.

Skin updates: No actives (*touchwood*).. whats left are mainly post acne marks.. Which im considering to get an IPL or laser done after my course..

Side effects: My shoulder continue to ache like crazy... and oh, i tripped some time ago n landed on my knee.. Now, there is a bruise which is there for like 2 weeks?? My knee still hurts when i walk... i wonder if accutane got to do with bruises/cuts and all? Im so prone to getting bruises and random cuts.. it seems to heal much much slower than before...

hmm.. Looking at the pics makes me feel a little "happier".. Although i can never ever get my once

flawless skin back.. i can see some little improvements now... Hoping that this would continue..

Edited by fel_han
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Feeling tired, lack of energy and sick of my father's consistent tantrums. He is almost 50 yrs old.. n yet.. he seems to b like a little kid, kicking up a big fuss about everything. Sometimes i dont know whats wrong with him, or what wrong did we do to cause him such disturbing behavoir. He jus basically can find fault at the smallest thing and scolding everyone in the family. I pity my mum.. sometimes i wonder y would my mum marry such a man? He is a man who snaps n snaps.. nothing violent or abuse from him.. but verbal abuse is bad enough. He gave us life... n he could end up destroying our life too...

sorry.. this post had nothing to do with acne.. bear with me for my negative post.. i cant help it.. need a channel to vent it out.. i feel so out of breath.. its so suffocating..

Edited by fel_han
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thanks faithinhim :D

Not sure y my face seems to b redder than the usual.. was at a cosmetic counter yesterday and this beauty assistant was introducing me all kinds of products for my scars n red skin..

i m so demoralised...

i hate being at the mercy of acne.. i hate being at the mercy of my father's constant tantrums.. i tink i just hate my life .....

Edited by fel_han
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i am really sorry you are feeling so bad right now though. maybe they feel the same way and you can all find a way to confront your father or talk to him about changing his behavior? I don't know your family, but if this is possible, maybe getting him to realize what he is doing could help. The unfortunate thing is that people usually don't change their behavior until they understand that they can't get away with it.

good luck!

35 year old woman

20 mg sotret

Edited by zucchini007
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Your skin is looking awesome!

Sorry about the family drama. I get that too. My dad is pretty laid back most of the time, and then he'll explode over something really stupid. Don't know how my mom deals with it either.

As for side effects, I have the exact same ones: muscle aches and fatigue! My right shoulder has clicked when I rotate it ever since starting Accutane.

But it's worth it!

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Hey !

I'm sorry things feel so bad right now. I had a very similar time a few weeks ago with my Dad. We work together EVERY DAY! and now that I've sold my apartment I get to move home with my parents for three months.... That means I get to hang out with my dad all day and all night if I choose to actually go home :P ugh

Parents can be difficult but I find things tend to go in cycles and you are experincing the bad part of the cycle right now. I'm sure things will get better soon. Just focus on you and how wonderful you look ( because you look fantastic!) and how much better you'll feel when your skin is 100% clear and your done with the accutane!

Don't worry about the scars either. Just think of how terrible you felt when all those red spots were pimples! Your healing and the red scars will go away soon so don't worry!

Keep your head up and vent all you need to here! we will all be here to support you :D

take care!

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hey peeps!

havent been updating my log here.... so sorrie... was so tied up with work n such...

Day 155

Skin update - tiny red skin bumps every now n then.. but, no "real" actives for abt 1 month.. am pretty satistified with my condition right now =) *touchwood*

I still have about 10 more days to go before i officially retire from accutane.. getting more n more panicky right now.. terrified of post-accutane breakouts.. *jitters*

Side efffects - all the side effects remain... n i think.. i have been sick for like.. 2 wks?? Been coughing non-stop to a point where i have trouble sleeping at night.. ='(

My life right now - i should probably tell u about what im busy with right now.. i have just launched a online apparel store about 2 wks ago... been quite bz, sourcing for suppliers, getting stocks.. keeping track of the accts..thats partially the main reason y i havent been updating here!

N oh, I'm also doing the modelling for my online store.. its really tiring.. but a fun thing to do! I love fashion.. and it has always been my dream to open a store! =)

I should prob take a close up of my complexion right now.. hmm.. will post it later tonight or tmr.. *crossing-fingers*

Responses:

missmooshoo007, headtrip_honey & michellemac: Thanks thanks thanks! u gals are always here for me.. giving me encouragement n words of wisdom.. love u all!

hmm... i'm actually trying to accept the way things are.. i cant change my dad.. but i can change the way i handle the situation i guess.. trying to be as positive as possible *prays*

Edited by fel_han
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Ok,

Have just uploaded pics... posting it here as promised..

*EDIT*: Refer to pg 8 for pics.

Responses:

HereComesTheSun: Thanks for the well wishes! U look amazing as well..

nick04: Thanks! I wish u luck too in your 2nd course =)

I think this is probably, the very 1st time in my 2 yrs of acne-ridden life... that i actually managed to smile confidently in front of a 15 megapix camera...

Oh, hope i dont jinx myself *knocking on wood*

Edited by fel_han
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You look beautiful!

I'm so happy that you feel your confidence coming back! You should be completely confidence because your just so gorgeous and your skin looks perfect!

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Its near 12am now and i just cant get to sleep... my cough is getting worse and i've been to the doc twice in like 2 weeks.. just had my cough medicine.. which is supposedly to be drowsy.. how come i dont feel drowsy at all?? i just hate getting sick... n i hate having sleepless nights.. i look like a zombie now.... jinxed panda eyes.... I'm probably being out of topic here... sorry, im just so random today..

Responses:

CUTiie: Thanks for the compliment! Month 2 is normally where u'll see more of the dry skin and side effects. But it will all be over real soon! Wish u luck in your course! :cool:

michellemac: awwww... thanksss! Im hoping that i'll look gorgeous when im off tane.. I cant help but to think of the possibility of a 2nd course if i ever have a relapse.. yar, i know.. im being pathetically pessimistic here.. :doh:

Oh well.. i should probably just think on the brighter side! =)

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