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I really feel like I need to vent here. I've dealt with mild-moderate acne for a while now but it's become so much more than that and I feel like I need to get my feelings out. I've also been dealing with varying levels of depression, ocd and body dismorphic disorder for as long as I can remember. During this struggle, I've always had someone to fall back on. There is this girl I had dated for 3 years. She knows me better than anyone else and I always found that I could confide in here. I was in a small rut of depression last summer and broke up with her out of the blue like a [email protected] Since then, I've fallen into one of the deepest depressions I have ever encountered. Right after the break up I broke out like a mad man. I withdrew from my first semester as a sophomore and have been in hermit mode ever since. I went through 10 weeks of antibiotics and retinoids to see my skin become even worse. I recently stopped the topical meds and my overall skin appearance looks so much better but now, yet again, I'm dealing with scattered cysts/pustules and of course the left over red marks/ PIH. If I'm not obsessing over my face, I'm thinking about how I #@$%ed things up with the love of my life. I blow off my friends and have missed so many social events now it's perplexing. I'm constantly using sleep as an escape from life. I sleep anywhere from 10-14 hours a day and found that it is the only time I'm truly happy. I've stopped eating and have lost 15 lbs. in the last 2 weeks. I mean, in short, my life is a mess. I'm quite aware many of you are going to say to seek out help, and I have in the past. For three years I lived life all on my own with out the help of medication (I think I was using my GF as an antidepressant :naughty:) and am afraid to start again. From my experience, SSRIs like Prozac change my personality, something I am not too fond of. I've just been holding out hope for the last six months that I'd wake up, become strong again and be able to live my life as I used to. That hope along with my confidence has slowly been fading as the days go by. I wish I could just make believe my acne wasn't as big of a deal like I used to, but it compounded with so many other things has been debilitating to say the least. I guess I just needed to get this off my chest. Hello 2010 :boohoo:.

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Paragraphing ?

You might wanna consider CBT (COGNITIVE BEHAVIOURAL THEAPY) it'll get your life back on track for sure, you gotta put in the hardwork tho the therapist will merely support you along the way.

Good Luck kiddo.

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Paragraphing ?

You might wanna consider CBT (COGNITIVE BEHAVIOURAL THEAPY) it'll get your life back on track for sure, you gotta put in the hardwork tho the therapist will merely support you along the way.

Good Luck kiddo.

Haha the vent just came out as a stream of emotion. Proper grammar wasn't a top priority. I believe I have tried CBT in the past with little success. I was much more immature then, maybe I'll give it another go. Thanks.

- wiki

One etiological theory of depression is Aaron Beck's cognitive theory of depression. His theory states that depressed people think the way they do because their thinking is biased towards negative interpretations. According to this theory, depressed people acquire a negative schema of the world in childhood and adolescence as an effect of stressful life events. When the person with such schemata encounters a situation that in some way resembles the conditions in which the original schema was learned, the negative schemata of the person are activated.[35]

Beck also described a negative cognitive triad, made up of the negative schemata and cognitive biases of the person; Beck theorized that depressed individuals make negative evaluations of themselves, the world, and the future. Depressed people, according to this theory, have views such as, "I never do a good job", "It is impossible to have a good day", and "things will never get better." A negative schema helps give rise to the cognitive bias, and the cognitive bias helps fuel the negative schema. This is the negative triad. Also, Beck proposed that depressed people often have the following cognitive biases: arbitrary inference, selective abstraction, over-generalization, magnification and minimization. These cognitive biases are quick to make negative, generalized, and personal inferences of the self, thus fueling the negative schema.[35]

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1. Separate yourself from your emotions, your not a girl. Girls have a large emotional capacity, you don't.

2. Simplify.

3. Now, your ready to think logically. .. Do so.

4. Watch the office, its funny.

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1. Separate yourself from your emotions, your not a girl. Girls have a large emotional capacity, you don't.

2. Simplify.

3. Now, your ready to think logically. .. Do so.

4. Watch the office, its funny.

1. Agreed, although I believe our emotional capacities are even, we just have the ability to separate ourselves from those emotions.

2. Okay..

3. I am.

4. Not bad, I think it's working..

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had severe acne for 4 years with loads of permanent scars to show for it.. i feel for u man

considering i slept all of 20 hours last night and now its 4 in the morning and im about as awake as can be..

i like sleep.. dreaming makes me feel like im in another world where i dont have to worry about my bullshit life.. i think im depressed

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I was the same before xmas. It like a nightmare but with out waking up. It horrible. Why do people get acne? Animals don't get acne.I hope things get better for you. Do you have any family who are willing to help or listen to you? sometime t talking is a great help but being a guy it hard to do cause people think you should be strong. But you can only be strong if you can talk and sort out your feelings.Life is so unfair. But us acne people are here for you and always willling to understand as we are or have been in the same shit .I hope you feel better soon and find a cure for skin.Am sure you will.Good luck

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Sleeping in excess is definitely a symptom of depression, but depression can mask different disorders. Find a good therapist, one that can help you figure out what your options are. You haven't exhausted every resource, you only think you have.

Do you have any hobbies? Do you exercise? Personally, when my skin was particularly bad, I found that exercising would make me feel better.

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Thanks for the support everyone! I truly appreciate it. To answer some of your questions/responses...

Akuma - I hate that feeling when ya just can't sleep anymore and you feel like you can stay up for two days straight. I think you're depressed too = /.

Junior - I actually do have people I can talk to but I keep on pushing them farther and farther away and it doesn't seem plausible for me to try and talk to the one person I do want to talk to, my ex. My acne has definitely calmed down a little since writing this but my mind state hasn't changed. Acne has had some long term effect on my psyche.

Electric Feel - Before becoming sedentary, I had a bunchhhh of hobbies, but you can only do so much at home. Although not extremely outgoing, I went out. I exercise four times a week and it sure does help, but not enough. Honestly, the root of my problems are much bigger than acne. For me and I think most of us who have become anti-social due to our appearance, I believe acne is just the tip of the iceberg.

Again, thanks for the responses everyone..

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I feel for you. In high school I used reading as a form of escape. I liked it because it completely detached me from reality. I am a really light sleeper, I could never really sleep for more than 10 hours, and I never dream, so sleeping as a form of escapism wasn't for me. On the other hand, reading has at least helped me academically. I have never had anything below an A in an English class. :D

Edited by red2528

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