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Don't you just hate it when...

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I honestly can't stand it when people who never had acne as badly as I currently have give me advice on how to clear my skin.

I'm 15 and I've had acne since I was 11 but in the past year it's gone from moderate to clear to moderately-severe and I hate it. I'm back on the regimen, as I said, i cleared and then made the horrendous choice to stop using BP as I had cleared.

Anyway, one of my dad's good friends, who also happens to be the mother of a friend of mine had a go at me today for not using toner. I tried to explain to her that all toners have ever done for me is broken me out more and they've never done a thing for my large pores. She continued to rant about how toners make pores close up so dirt can't get into them, etc, etc. She then began to talk about what products her daughter [my friend who has only very light acne] uses and completely brushed off the fact that acne and oily skin runs on both sides of my family.

God, i felt like slapping her. I'm sick and tired of people who've never had moderate acne or worse giving me advice because:

1. It's my skin, I know how it reacts to certain products.

2. It makes me feel bad coz there's not a thing I can do about it until the BP starts working again, because acne runs in my family.

3. If they've never had acne to the same extent they won't know how it affects people who do have acne, emotionally and physically.

4. If they've never had acne to the same extent they wouldn't have a clue how to even start treating it.

Does anyone else have this issue?

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I don't understand why people react this way. She was going out of her way to try to help because she cares about you. You should at the least be considerate of the advice she is trying to give, even if you are not going to take it.

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^ It just puts some people off and leaves a bad taste in other people's mouths. I'd be more upset than offended, though..

I wasn't as upset or offended as I was annoyed. It just irritated me to have her constantly tell me 'you need to do this, you need to do that because it'll solve everything' especially when she wouldn't listen to me when I told her that I've already tried it and I'm on something at actually works for me and my skin. I told her that I've used toner before in a regular routine but she simply just said that I mustn't have been using it right or enough and completely ignored me when I told her I've used a toner in my routine for over a year before and it's never done a thing.

It's not that I'm not thankful for any advice she gives me, as she's given me great advice before on other things, but I don't appreciate her telling me things like this when she admits to only having light acne as a teen, especially as I'm on the other end of the acne spectrum.

As I said, it's basically that she's annoyed me because she's never had to go through the same thing as I have in regards to acne.

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i know how you feel... really. i'm 24 and i've had acne since i was your age. but my acne was so bad that it left horrible scars on my cheeks and nose and temples. cystic acne is a bitch... it really suck when people who have "blemishes" bitch about how shitty their life is with "acne." i really dont think that if your acne clears up by using clearasil that you should be wallowing in self pity.... just my two cents.

ps.

i've heard it all from people

"do you wash your face?"

"have you gone to a dermatologist?"

"have you heard of proactive??"

ive been on accutane 4 times.

Edited by Dudemag Fitzgerald

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Yes, this drives me up the wall too. The bothersome thing in these comments is the underlying implication that you could get clear skin if you REALLY wanted to and obviously just haven't bothered. Not to mention the last thing anyone wants to be reminded of if any social situation is their acne. "Gee, thanks so much for bringing it up, I was ALMOST not thinking about it every single second."

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^ It just puts some people off and leaves a bad taste in other people's mouths. I'd be more upset than offended, though..

I wasn't as upset or offended as I was annoyed. It just irritated me to have her constantly tell me 'you need to do this, you need to do that because it'll solve everything' especially when she wouldn't listen to me when I told her that I've already tried it and I'm on something at actually works for me and my skin. I told her that I've used toner before in a regular routine but she simply just said that I mustn't have been using it right or enough and completely ignored me when I told her I've used a toner in my routine for over a year before and it's never done a thing.

It's not that I'm not thankful for any advice she gives me, as she's given me great advice before on other things, but I don't appreciate her telling me things like this when she admits to only having light acne as a teen, especially as I'm on the other end of the acne spectrum.

As I said, it's basically that she's annoyed me because she's never had to go through the same thing as I have in regards to acne.

Oh I know, I can relate. It sucks.

I just meant I'm practically Ms.Sensitive... so if someone offered me something (a guy in my gym class told me to get Proactive the other day so trust me, it's happened) I'd sit down and cry rather than be mad. Haha. (And I did :shifty:)

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I completely agree. One time my "friend" gave me a coupon that she found in a magazine for Proactiv. I wasn't sure whether to yell or start laughing. My brother also struggles with acne and my grandmother asked him if he had been eating a lot of chocolate lately because "you know it causes acne". Needless to say he was pretty irritated.

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I completely agree. One time my "friend" gave me a coupon that she found in a magazine for Proactiv. I wasn't sure whether to yell or start laughing. My brother also struggles with acne and my grandmother asked him if he had been eating a lot of chocolate lately because "you know it causes acne". Needless to say he was pretty irritated.

grrr. i hate that chocolate thing. my friend said the other day "one day, i just wanna sit down and eat a whole bowl of chocolate cake batter." and when she was questioned as to why she doesnt just do it while she had the bowl in front of her she said "coz it'll make me break out"...

that pissed me off. She was standing there complaining about break outs when her acne has never been more than maybe 3 red dots on her chin which are easily covered with foundation, whereas I was standing next to her with moderately severe acne.... so I know how your brother feels.

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I hate getting acne advice, especially from people who have never even had acne. That would be like me, as a thin person who doesn't have to do anything to be that way, giving chubby people weight-loss advice. Even if I meant well by it, it wouldn't be well-received and would just be rude as hell. I'm 15 and I know better than that, why don't some adults know to keep their hurtful advice to themselves?

When I was in 6th grade, I had a friend's mom tell me that I just needed to use apple cider vinegar. So I did. Full-strength. It burned my face. I don't listen to acne advice anymore. >.>

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