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How ya feelin' about your acne today?

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Despair. I long to feel what it feels like to have clear beautiful skin. To be able to go anywhere and to not be stopped from your face. :( How easy is it for those without skin problems? 

Edited by holdingontohope

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This is probably the worst i've felt in a year. Thought the acne.org regime might help but im up on month 7 soon and it has become worse and worse since christmas. Trying to stay strong but its hard to keep oneself from crying. Freaking 8 years. Come on, like will it never end? Talk about needing a break. Hard to stay focused on Uni and leaving the house when all i wanna do is cover my head with a pillow. But hey I probably got another 20 years of acne life ahead of me so might aswell try and befriend my sorrow.

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really sad. really anxious. really hopeless.  i wish i knew the answers. i wish i could accept myself. right now i don't want to live, especial if things keep going the way they have the last year. i feel ruined and disgusting. 

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I feel so exhausted from trying to deal with my acne right now. I just feel like venting a little.
So I never had acne during the awkward years when I was 13-14. A few of my friends had acne at the time, but my skin was completely clear, apart from an occasional small pimple once in a blue moon. It's when I turned 15 that I actually developed acne, but even then it was pretty mild for a while, mostly just a couple of zits before my period. I saw a dermatologist, she prescribed BP and some face wash and it was fine for a bit. But then I started to get clogged pores and suddenly every pore on my face was pretty much blocked up. The texture of my skin changed completely and it became gross and bumpy. My derm prescribed a whole bunch of topical treatments over the course of about a year, but everything would work for a while and then just stop. My face was full of little bumps and whiteheads and new pimples almost every day and I started to get hyper pigmentation and red marks because of it. It just continued to get worse and worse, and I eventually started to get cystic acne as well. I'm 18now and everyone I know my age has sort of grown out of their acne at this point but mine just seems to get worse and it's so frustrating. I have tried just about everything under the sun short of Accutane; I've taken every kind of topical treatment imaginable and was put on Doxicyclin for a while, which kept me clear for a couple of months but then it was back to square one. I change my sheets every other day, I follow a very healthy diet (no junk food, no refined carbs, no sugar), I've eliminated dairy from my diet, which helped with my cystic acne, I try not to pick or touch my face, I follow a simple routine ( a Neutrogena salicylic wash in the morning, followed by Cetaphil moisturizer, and then a pH balancing foam wash in the evening. I use castor oil in the evening as that has helped with my clogged pores and cysts, as well as my scars), I've stopped using makeup daily, I've even tried the oil cleansing thing, which honestly just made my skin worse but I was desperate and at a loss about how to deal with my face.

Recently, I've developed acne all the way down my back as well. At this point, I am just so tired and frustrated. I do everything I can to take care of my skin, both inside and out, but it all just seems a bit pointless right now. Every time I catch myself in a mirror anywhere I feel so gross and disgusted. My skin is so red and aggravated, and there's nothing I can do about all my red marks because whatever I put on them breaks me out further. I don't want to go out or even leave my room anymore and I become terribly anxious and self conscious when I'm in public. I've been trying to think positively, but after three years of doing that I'm feeling pretty hopeless.

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Majority of it has subsided for 2 months now, has never been so happy, on verge of dosing Accutane, * hasn't yet*.
But still, gotta keep an eye for a few months to see if there's any fluctuation, don't really wish to enjoy a short lived dream.

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I have been on differin treatment for 3 months now for comedonal acne. There's been lots of improvement and I am thankful for that. The whole journey has been truly depressing. I have mainly marks now and they are equally heartbreaking. When will this end? I miss my life

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Today I am looking worst in this year so far. I cant even count how many new pimples have appeared. I try to hide from everything and everyone. In addition to that I have been feeling sick the whole week and I lost my voice. I mean I cant even show up anywhere + I cant talk. And this upcoming week I have so many important events, I dont know how can I handle all this stuff. Hopefully some miracle will happen or something. I have been only surviving and not living for the past 5 years that I have acne ...

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On 4/9/2017 at 7:13 AM, MyLifeIsPain said:

Today I am looking worst in this year so far. I cant even count how many new pimples have appeared. I try to hide from everything and everyone. In addition to that I have been feeling sick the whole week and I lost my voice. I mean I cant even show up anywhere + I cant talk. And this upcoming week I have so many important events, I dont know how can I handle all this stuff. Hopefully some miracle will happen or something. I have been only surviving and not living for the past 5 years that I have acne ...

 
On 4/5/2017 at 2:46 AM, RubyK said:

I have been on differin treatment for 3 months now for comedonal acne. There's been lots of improvement and I am thankful for that. The whole journey has been truly depressing. I have mainly marks now and they are equally heartbreaking. When will this end? I miss my life



I know how long of a battle acne can be. I know how you feel when you talk about the hardships of social interaction with acne/acne marks. The disease can truly steal time and quality from your life. It can drain you of energy and obliterate your self confidence, leaving you with poor self image, anxiety, and depression.

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Everyday lately seems to be a struggle , I want to believe that accutane is going to clear me but staring my 4th month and I still have clogged pores , black heads, and milia . I shouldn't have had such high expectations, that my skin would be flawless. So yeah today is a tough day.

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14 hours ago, Fellowyogi said:

Everyday lately seems to be a struggle , I want to believe that accutane is going to clear me but staring my 4th month and I still have clogged pores , black heads, and milia . I shouldn't have had such high expectations, that my skin would be flawless. So yeah today is a tough day.

There is this body builder on youtube that took accutane for two years, he's pretty popular actually, his name is Brian Turner. Check him out for motivation through this dark, difficult time of yours. Hope you are clear soon :)

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I am grateful that my acne treatment worked and now I am down to PIH. I am undergoing IPL treatment for the marks and there has been gradual improvement. Marks were suppose to clear after 2 treatments but my inflammation was so deep during the breakout it is taking a longer time. Everyday is a struggle. After every treatment, there's fear and anxiety that the marks will not clear for good. I thought once the acne cleared I will be feeling much better but the marks has equally ruined my self esteem. I struggle everyday and I can't even look at myself in the mirror 

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Im feeling terrible today. Last week I was looking sort of OK and I had a job interview, which I won and the boss said that I should come today for the first time. Unfortunately during the weekend I developed a giant pimple on my cheek, which made me really depressed. Today I had to call him and lie to him, that I cant come today. Yes, first day at a new job and I was unable to come due to a giant zit. Now I have to lie to my family, why I wasnt at work. I hate these moments ... I wish my acne problems would end after 5 years of struggle, but it seems like there's no end and my acne will last forever ... #FML

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Annoyed.  Despite being on spiro, it seems that stress still has a bigger influence.  Dealing with 5 active pimples with whiteheads............

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This past week has been an absolutely hell for me. Not that I would look terrible, I just had some very dark feelings and felt really depressed and anxious. When I think about that I will graduate in like 6 months and have to go through the process of looking for a job, while I dont really have any friends and never really clicked with anyone ... it made me really really sad. So sad, that I booked an appointment with a psychiatrist. Well today I had the appointment and wasnt really looking that bad (only had a couple of older healing pimples) and I tried to explain what was bothering me. I briefly mentioned acne and other problems, that I am not happy with how I look, but she didnt really understand. Since then I wasnt able to talk about acne anymore. I just complained that I have like almost no beard or facial hair, that I look younger than my peers, or that I have a weird bump at the back of my head. She didnt really understand, probably because she doesnt get a lot of people like me. Anyway she prescribed me some antidepressants, so hopefully even if I dont treat my acne, at least I wont have this horrendous anxiety attacks and depression. I am little bit scared about the next appointment, whether I should lie, that everything just got better, or try to tell her about the acne again. Nevertheless, I honestly hope that you all feel at least mentally OK, while maybe not looking the best, because these mental problems are sometimes worse than the actual disease. Have a great day everyone.

Edited by MyLifeIsPain

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Sad...... holidays are hard regardless and realizing that I’m heading into another new year with the same old issue is frustrating and makes me feel sad.  Feeling hopeless......

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1 hour ago, leelowe1 said:

Sad...... holidays are hard regardless and realizing that I’m heading into another new year with the same old issue is frustrating and makes me feel sad.  Feeling hopeless......

Was just about to write a post here about feeling the same exact way. The Holidays have been pretty dark for me the last few years, this year hasn't been better. 

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Frustrated.  Every time some healing occurs, i get 2-3 new spots.  This week especially was very frustrating as i developed 7 inflamed pimples on my lip.  

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Is there any other way but just to say “ I FEEL AND LOOK LIKE S#%T!!! 

I look like a pepperoni pizza. And these dang zits hurt like heck... Ugh... been struggling for 8 years now of on and off acne breakouts. All thanks to my messed up hormones. PCOS Acne is soo hard to treat. And I can start to feel my back is starting to act up as well.... gggrrrr

Well, trying a modified Acne.org regimen for now and see if it works. I will be using the Johnsons top to toe baby wash for a cleanser, then I have the Acne.org BP treatment, and i have my trusted moisturizer.

God - please help me and heal me... Amen 

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I just can't accept living this way anymore... i just can't win.

11 years of acne, it's killing me each day, when you think its getting better, worses again and the circle never ends. God, what i did to deserve it? I did not suffer enough?

5 accutane courses already and no permanent cure... so tired to spend money in useless treatments, no one f*cking care, why? Why they think this all complain and bullshit? It's so easy to say when it's not you who's suffering, i am literally crying.
 

Edited by Turko

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On 3/19/2018 at 9:44 AM, Turko said:

I just can't accept living this way anymore... i just can't win.

11 years of acne, it's killing me each day, when you think its getting better, worses again and the circle never ends. God, what i did to deserve it? I did not suffer enough?

5 accutane courses already and no permanent cure... so tired to spend money in useless treatments, no one f*cking care, why? Why they think this all complain and bullshit? It's so easy to say when it's not you who's suffering, i am literally crying.
 

Hang in there.  I'm a three time accutane user and i'm still struggling at almost 35.  No one ever does anything to deserve acne - it's just a roll of the dice.  

Feeling tired.  I'm back to seeing a naturopath in conjunction with taking spiro.  The last month has been really down for my skin.  I'm slowly implementing the supplements that she prescribed.  Feeling frustrated with my skin , my job, everything.  Starting to date again after a long break and definitely stressing about my skin.  In a way, it may be a blessing in disguise.  It'll weed out the guys that are superficial and leave the ones who are more interested in getting to know me as a person.  

Still.....wish i didn't have to deal with this.  

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