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Kyza

Being isolated, invisible...a ghost

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well i have this friend right, he is my best friend and we have loads in common and i love him (no homo). however this guy is EXTREMELY good looking. every time we go out he gets all sorts of attention from people staring at him, people coming up and talking to him, people coming up to him and asking him stuff etc...and then there's me, i don't consider myself to be attractive at all, i know this is a bit cliché but i think im god awful. i have horrible skin, acne, hair loss etc..my facial features are ok but i look god awful ALL the time. so when i go out with him or even by myself, it seems that no-one likes me, no-one wants anything to do with me, no-one looks at me, no-one talks to me. hence i feel invisible, a ghost. i try to be friendly with people but they just act fake-happy then avoid you. i hate this and i feel so alone and ostracised. i dont think ive done anything bad to anyone and im not a bad person. i just want someone to say hello to me... i want to die.

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I think confidence is key. When people brim with confidence it emanates an aura of happiness, and puts out really good vibes. Other people pick up on these vibes and take your lead, they'll want to be around you because you seem so confident in yourself.

If something like acne has really destroyed your confidence I think a good way you can restore it is through therapy because it helps to talk about your issues with a professional who can truly help you accept that you are unique and wonderful despite the acne. As long as you have acne you are going to have an excuse to believe that you are unattractive, especially next to your gorgeous friend. You have programmed yourself to believe this, you need to reverse that mentality, and a professional can help.

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I thought I had this problem! But now that I'm 97% clear and all muscular because I lift weight 6 times a week. I have scars which bothers me but girls still looks at me! Some of them even smile as they look at me! But I don't have the courage to talk to them. I'm too shy. In addition, it's difficult for me to meet girls! I have no female friends,>_<.

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well i have this friend right, he is my best friend and we have loads in common and i love him (no homo). however this guy is EXTREMELY good looking. every time we go out he gets all sorts of attention from people staring at him, people coming up and talking to him, people coming up to him and asking him stuff etc...and then there's me, i don't consider myself to be attractive at all, i know this is a bit cliché but i think im god awful. i have horrible skin, acne, hair loss etc..my facial features are ok but i look god awful ALL the time. so when i go out with him or even by myself, it seems that no-one likes me, no-one wants anything to do with me, no-one looks at me, no-one talks to me. hence i feel invisible, a ghost. i try to be friendly with people but they just act fake-happy then avoid you. i hate this and i feel so alone and ostracised. i dont think ive done anything bad to anyone and im not a bad person. i just want someone to say hello to me... i want to die.

hey hey...dont feel low my friend :) chill down...everbody goes for looks at the first go but at the end of the day..its person good at heart that matters! Try to build up a good personality and go for grooming sessions . I think that will help u a lot!

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This is EXACTLY how my life is right now.

My best friend used to be really shy, and people tended to like me more. I never in a million years (as mean as it sounds it's TRUE, I used to think this all the time) thought she'd be the popular pretty one. I always grew up thinking I'd be the hot cheerleader of the school and she'd be the shy lame girl and never pictured her having a boyfriend.

Well, she got hot over the summer. She's more outgoing and everyone LOVES her now. And I sit there sometimes and feel so out of place, because they all talk to her and don't even acknowledge me. If they do, it's to say something mean.

She has a boyfriend and flirts with all the boys. It's annoying, but I realized, I'm just jealous and being selfish.

I should be happy for her, but it's hard.

I think you should try, too. Be happy for your friend that he has such a good life. If you truly know him and like him, you'll know he's a good guy and probably deserves it. :)

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This is EXACTLY how my life is right now.

My best friend used to be really shy, and people tended to like me more. I never in a million years (as mean as it sounds it's TRUE, I used to think this all the time) thought she'd be the popular pretty one. I always grew up thinking I'd be the hot cheerleader of the school and she'd be the shy lame girl and never pictured her having a boyfriend.

Well, she got hot over the summer. She's more outgoing and everyone LOVES her now. And I sit there sometimes and feel so out of place, because they all talk to her and don't even acknowledge me. If they do, it's to say something mean.

She has a boyfriend and flirts with all the boys. It's annoying, but I realized, I'm just jealous and being selfish.

I should be happy for her, but it's hard.

I think you should try, too. Be happy for your friend that he has such a good life. If you truly know him and like him, you'll know he's a good guy and probably deserves it. :)

A Normal but a true friend.. :)

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first of all thanx for all the replies ppls :) yes i think i should just be happy for my friend, its not like he doesn't deserve it because he really does!! he is a nice guy. i think i should just going focus on myself from now on and not focus on how good others have got. its just really hard being second best all the time. if anyone else wants to add anything plz feel free to do so.

Edited by Kyza

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So basically, you're saying that the good-looking popular guy in school has chosen you as a close friend. Hmmm. Wouldn't that seem to indicate you've got more going for you than just your face?

i just want someone to say hello to me

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So basically, you're saying that the good-looking popular guy in school has chosen you as a close friend. Hmmm. Wouldn't that seem to indicate you've got more going for you than just your face?

i just want someone to say hello to me

I know a guy (adult) with some of the worst acne I've ever seen; even without the acne, he would never qualify as "handsome". He never waits for anyone to say "hello", he says it first, sticking out his hand and looking you in the eye. He's got a cute girlfriend and a skyrocketing restaurant business. I know it ain't easy for him to meet people all day and know they're (initially, until they get to know him) looking at his acne. He's trained himself to get out there and do it, and he's living proof that how you behave, what you do, eventually outweigh what you look like.

And, just consider this a message sent back in time from your future self: once women pass, oh, about the age of 25, "cute" begins to diminish in value while "smart, employed, treats me right, makes me laugh" starts to move up on the list. Statistically speaking (YMMV with any particular girl). :D

Ignore what other people think, make something of yourself, and then you'll probably find people are thinking quite well of you. IMHO.

Very inspirational, thanks for sharing :)

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Hey Kyza read my post. We have similiar problems except i dont feel i am ugly or anything. I just cant believe a human can be that good looking. Also after i meet him everything i thought i understood about relationships i realise is wrong. I used to think girls dont care about looks that much and physical appearance is not the most important in realationships. Now i know that those are wrong ( not completely wrong but quite wrong). I still believe not good looking people can get gf but someone good looking can easily break up their relationship.

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