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pink_melodies

I want to be a singer, but acne holds me back (LONG POST)

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Reason #1: I have acne marks and still break out from time to time.

Reason #2: I still get nervous.

#2 - that can be handled, and is being handled. #1 - not so easy. The break outs have only recently subsided with the sudden regularity of my menstrual cycle. I have been menstruating since age 12, breaking out since 13 or 14 (with a sudden stree: my parents separated and we moved). It started on my forehead, worked it's way down to my cheeks, and now it's on my lower face - this was all over an almost 10 year span (I'll be 22 in mid-July).

I have talks every now and then with my prefect-skinned fiance, and he is very easy-going about it. He still thinks I am gorgeous :wub: I only wish I thought as much of myself as he does of me...

What am I supposed to do? I want to start working on my passion now so I have a better chance of actually doing it for a living. I'm young, but I won't be forever. I have kids, and I need to be a good mom - caring for them and providing for them, giving them the best that I possibly can. I also don't want to regret for the rest of my life that I didn't pursue my dreams because of acne.

I don't know if I hate acne. I know I hate what society does when they see you with acne, just as they do when they see a drug addict, or welfare recipient (I am also one of those...), or child abuser. They run, gossip, and push them away. Everyone has something that they see wrong with them - why do we have to be the ones to SHOW people what is wrong with us, unwillingly, and before we even get to know them, if ever do at all?

I do the same as everyone else now - some stuff I do better. Rarely do I eat fast food (I love Popeyes :D ); I do eat chocolate, maybe 1 time every 1 or 2 weeks. I don't buy junk from the grocery store to snack on. I drink green tea with honey and lemon EVERY DAY. I don't drink a lot of milk. I haven't had beef in lord knows how long. Home cooked meals usually consist of fish as the protein. I wash my face only when it's dirty - not 2x daily anymore. I eat garlic on occasion, and ginger root tea (lemon and honey too).

Why do I show this mask, and people who are ugly INSIDE show nothing at all? Did Hitler break out? He should have... Do the men in Africa who spread HIV/AIDS knowingly, break out? They should...

And humbleness has become a part of me, for fear of being called out on my pizza face. I don't speak my feelings. When you bump in front of me in line, I let you so I don't call attention to my face. Cashier wanna be a bitch? Go ahead, just don't be too loud; we wouldn't want people looking this way. Ask about my acne, and tell how pretty I COULD be without it? I won't utter a SOUND.

Holiday pictures? No thanks. My kids won't know WHAT mommy looked like when they were young. Pictures with the hubby, just to take them? I really want to, but.... Oh and being a singer requires video shoots and promotional pictures... I want to, but I can't.

UGH. Maybe my nervousness is tied to my NOT wanting people to actually look at me and notice what's going on. Who knows - I know I won't as long as ACNE is living here.

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Reason #1: I have acne marks and still break out from time to time.

Reason #2: I still get nervous.

#2 - that can be handled, and is being handled. #1 - not so easy. The break outs have only recently subsided with the sudden regularity of my menstrual cycle. I have been menstruating since age 12, breaking out since 13 or 14 (with a sudden stree: my parents separated and we moved). It started on my forehead, worked it's way down to my cheeks, and now it's on my lower face - this was all over an almost 10 year span (I'll be 22 in mid-July).

I have talks every now and then with my prefect-skinned fiance, and he is very easy-going about it. He still thinks I am gorgeous :wub: I only wish I thought as much of myself as he does of me...

What am I supposed to do? I want to start working on my passion now so I have a better chance of actually doing it for a living. I'm young, but I won't be forever. I have kids, and I need to be a good mom - caring for them and providing for them, giving them the best that I possibly can. I also don't want to regret for the rest of my life that I didn't pursue my dreams because of acne.

I don't know if I hate acne. I know I hate what society does when they see you with acne, just as they do when they see a drug addict, or welfare recipient (I am also one of those...), or child abuser. They run, gossip, and push them away. Everyone has something that they see wrong with them - why do we have to be the ones to SHOW people what is wrong with us, unwillingly, and before we even get to know them, if ever do at all?

I do the same as everyone else now - some stuff I do better. Rarely do I eat fast food (I love Popeyes :D ); I do eat chocolate, maybe 1 time every 1 or 2 weeks. I don't buy junk from the grocery store to snack on. I drink green tea with honey and lemon EVERY DAY. I don't drink a lot of milk. I haven't had beef in lord knows how long. Home cooked meals usually consist of fish as the protein. I wash my face only when it's dirty - not 2x daily anymore. I eat garlic on occasion, and ginger root tea (lemon and honey too).

Why do I show this mask, and people who are ugly INSIDE show nothing at all? Did Hitler break out? He should have... Do the men in Africa who spread HIV/AIDS knowingly, break out? They should...

And humbleness has become a part of me, for fear of being called out on my pizza face. I don't speak my feelings. When you bump in front of me in line, I let you so I don't call attention to my face. Cashier wanna be a bitch? Go ahead, just don't be too loud; we wouldn't want people looking this way. Ask about my acne, and tell how pretty I COULD be without it? I won't utter a SOUND.

Holiday pictures? No thanks. My kids won't know WHAT mommy looked like when they were young. Pictures with the hubby, just to take them? I really want to, but.... Oh and being a singer requires video shoots and promotional pictures... I want to, but I can't.

UGH. Maybe my nervousness is tied to my NOT wanting people to actually look at me and notice what's going on. Who knows - I know I won't as long as ACNE is living here.

I can relate to so much of what you've posted!

First of all, your fiance seems awesome & congratulations on being a good mom ^_^

When it comes to your singing I can relate so much. I've wanted to act (on stage) for YEARS and people tell me I'm a good actress. But I've never had the guts to admit its what I want to do for fear of being ridiculed, and I;ve never enrolled in acting classes for the same reason. Sometimes when I'm with friends we'll be talking about movie stars and they'll say "Why is SHE so famous? She's too ugly to be an actress!" & it really hits me hard :unsure:

I regret so much not having the guts to go take part in community theatre and school plays. I'm working on trying out for stuff now, pushing my insecurities aside. Hopefully my talent will outshine my physical appearance?

Please please live your dream & perform live and be my hero lol ! You're also very pretty, so good makup could be a temporary solution!

As for people making judgements about acne-sufferers - they have NO right to judge someone based on appearane. IMO they are the ones with the disease, not us. Also, how dare they judge people based on their "social standing" ? We are only better by the way we choose to live our lives honestly and with dignity.

I just wanted to lend my support, and it looks like we have a lot in common by the struggles we face as acne-sufferers. We just keep going and never give up :D Good luck & I hope my input was helpful :shrug:

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Aww, I'm really sorry to hear that. But from looking at your picture, you're beautiful. I want to be an actress, and I'm working hard at it. us acne sufferers just have to work twice as hard as everyone else to achieve our goals.

I know it's hard, but you just need to put on a brave face!

Bets of luck

Thanks a bunch - I hope you make it too!

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hey..very nice post in regards to opening up to your feelings. 1st your fiance is a lucky man, i see past your acne and i see a pretty woman. what medicene are you on? try accutane yet?

another thing too, dont try and compare acne to as bad as somethin like child abuse and drug addiction, i mean yeah both suck, but one is controlable. you chose to beat a child and you chose to do drugs. i dont think ive ever woke up one morning and said "fuck yeah i got zits everywhere" ... maybe your just having a bad day but read some of my posts. there are children out there that dont live to see past there teens, children born into welfare. i am myself someone who lives off welfare and the state, but i mean i dont ever let it hold me down. i can see past people's acne. just how some people are self conscious about there weight, height. obviously come cases are more extreme then others, but if i had to chose one between somethin like acne, cancer, obesity, aids, bilemia, etc...id choose acne. sorry dont take it as im gettin on ya, but it kinda hurts to see people so down on themselves over this. majority of the world suffers from it..imagine bein a child that might have cancer, or have obesity..to have acne on top of it. god gave everyone a hand in life, you cant control what your given, you just have to make the best of the situation

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