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TrevorB

"Don't care what others think"...

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Don't you just hate when people tell you this?

"Oh, don't care what others think"

"You're acne isn't that bad"

"You're a guy, guy's shouldn't care about their looks"(my fucking retarded uncle said this to me)

How STUPID can some people be. Like seriously I almost punched my uncle in the face once but I try to control myself since i don't like violence...

When people say "don't care what others think" do they not consider what i think?

When i look at myself in the mirror i feel grossed out, depressed, and many other negative things. When i see other people i see them as a mirror almost, they see my face the way i see it, and i see what i look like in my mind and i hate it. When i hear someone laugh in public i assume they're laughing at my face and i feel like i have to hide.

Honestly i couldn't care less of what others think. but when i see something of myself that i hate it tears me apart. Even if my acne was invisible to everyone but me i would still feel pretty much the same.

Now i know they're just trying to help... but really people need to think before they speak, this is terrible advice and it makes me feel worse.

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I had to laugh at my boyfriend this weekend... I started to talk about my skin and how it got screwed cause i ate 1lb of snow crab legs... he said- Oh its looking clear on your cheeks and looking smoother... Im thinking. OK thats ONE area but the rest of me has little bumps. I knew he was just saying it was looking better because i started to feel LOW about it again... I wish he didnt lie to me... when it looks good he says nothing but when i bitch he gives me a compliment and i get kind of mad about that... cause i know he just wants to cheer me up...

Then again i try to tell myself-- who cares what i look like.. its just a shell and doesnt change the fact that I am a kick ass person. :D lol

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i try to tell myself-- who cares what i look like.. its just a shell and doesnt change the fact that I am a kick ass person. :D lol

I've tried to tell myself that too.

But it doesn't work :(

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It sounds like I'm in the same boat as you; and you know what, I get the same shit from time to time, 'you're a guy and you shouldn't care about your looks'. They should go through what I (and many of you) have gone through before telling me that. When you get substantial acne - and I'm not talking about the imaginary blemishes on TV commercials, then it becomes much more than a question of vanity. You experience a fall from grace; people treat you differently - you become a leper in the eyes of an incredibly shallow society. This is where the bulk of the problems lies - in the mental state such treatment imprints on you. So even now when my skin has improved dramatically ( I may even be clear by the end of the summer) I still have the mindset, mental scars and anxiety that has held me back for so long.

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When I was at my worst (my skin is barely starting to improve) I had about 5 cysts on one cheek and trying to cover them with makeup was a nightmare. My skin was lumpy and it was so obvious I was trying to cover my bad acne with globs of makeup. I felt so low, but I dragged myself out of bed and went to work and looked every single person that walked by me in the eyes and smiled.

Most people expect us to look away or look down, screw that, even if I had to fake confidence I didn't want anyone to feel pity for me. I feign confidence really well, and others believe it so they respect me.

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They're trying to be helpful, but they aren't sure what to say. I know you feel down, but there isn't much anyone can do to help. It all has to do with your perspective, and what you feel.

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Yeah all the time people tell me my acne isn't too bad. It annoys me because they're usually the ones who don't know what its like to have acne. They have beautiful, perfect skin. Its so annoying...i hate it.

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Don't you just hate when people tell you this?

"Oh, don't care what others think"

"You're acne isn't that bad"

"You're a guy, guy's shouldn't care about their looks"(my fucking retarded uncle said this to me)

Reply to uncle: "...and neither should women."

Your uncle is clearly a sexist and has questionable morals. According to him, guys should be slobs and have beer bellies. Don't listen to him.

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At least you realize they are just trying to help. Unfortunately, it's an act of futility. People can give you advice until decades, and honestly, the decisions are up to you. It's hard to decipher good advice from bad, likewise with intentions, but in this case, they were just trying to help.

The reality is that we all care about others opinion's of ourselves, to an extent. It's socially programmed to seek the companionship of others, and to do so, requires people who approve and want to be with you. So of course we are going to worry about how others percieve us.

The important part is to not let this part of your life control you. They may observe you, some may even judge you, but you choose whether that affects your life or not.

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Loving yourself is one of the most hardest things to do but all the hard work pays off trust me.

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Don't you just hate when people tell you this?

"Oh, don't care what others think"

"You're acne isn't that bad"

"You're a guy, guy's shouldn't care about their looks"(my fucking retarded uncle said this to me)

Reply to uncle: "...and neither should women."

Your uncle is clearly a sexist and has questionable morals. According to him, guys should be slobs and have beer bellies. Don't listen to him.

Agreed, and the type to think that women should always look like angelina jolie. Such double standards. I can go one step further and pressume that he would make fun of well-groomed, trim men as being "gays" in order to make themselves feel better about being lazy about their appearances.

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