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MichaelCH

Have u also the feeling you missed most of your life so far?

HI

I'm feeling so bad and so sad at the moment being back to acne.org. Don't get me wrong, this is a great community, but there were times I thought I was all over this. My acne is just light at the moment, but my self-confidence will be destroyed forever.

I'm 25 now and educational-wise very succesful. I've achieved everything I wanted and I will be doing the job I've always dreamed of and of which I know could make me happy forever.

But, I'm my biggest enemy..probably since acne...I hate my looks, I hate myself and I cannot do anything against it. Even though most people I ask think I'm good looking or even hot...but I don't. I cannot look in a mirror I don't know and I especially cannot look at pictures. It's not just my skin anymore...it's my hair, my face...I think I look too young and way worse than all other guys in my class. I've had 1 girlfriend (3 years) and another one just for 4 weeks so far..when I started this new school 1 year ago everything seemed to improve. I was more popular than at home because I've started trying being more open etc. I even had this 4-week relationship back than. But soon everything fell apart. And it got worse and worse again. Now I feel so lonely..here I'm living abroad and just know the people of my class...in the evening I'm often alone...my friends from home hardly ever write me and except of my mother I hardly get any sms.

And now summer comes..and I hate summer..probably since my acne time...I feel even worse now, more alone and more special than before. Nobody around me probably notices all this. But I would like to be way more popular..I would love to greet almost everybody in school, get sms daily from friends. But it seems that hardly anyone cares if I'm even alive or not. For that matter I don't even care..I'm just living because I have to basically...

Years ago when I had acne and my problems started I always thought in some years all this will be over, I will have a family and live happily ever after. Now I'm approaching my 26th birthday and nothing changed. Not my relationship to friends, not my acne and in my opinion not even my looks, I still look the same age as back then. I'm getting afraid that my life will never change. I'm stuck in an never-ending nightmare. I've missed so much in my life...I've never been for a long time abroad or backpacking or anything else because I've always had my daily routine because of acne (and as stupid as it sounds as a guy) my hair. I've never had many girlfriends, I've never slept at a beach, I've missed on so much stuff. And now 25 years have passed...some friends are already married and I'm continuing on my miserable path...and I cannot escape. I just can't. Sometimes I hope this life is all a dream and I wake up and think "oh thank god it was just all a dream"...but unfortunately it works exactly opposite...I go to bed in the evening and think oh thank god I can forget about my whole life for the next 8 hours...

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There's still time. You're 25. Destiny isn't predetermined. Destiny is a choice that you will have to make. You are a creator, but the problem is you're intimidated by the unknown.

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I am almost the same, and recently i have become more self conscious of myself. Finishing my last year of high school last year, my acne was quite moderate and I had alot of scars with ocassional cysts. Somehow, I also had this pretty girl who liked me and she had no acne at all...zero! Now into university, I have alot less acne, but for some reason i am more self conscious, its very strange. My acne before stopped me from getting into anything serious with this girl, but now that my acne is much more improved, I think its time that i express my true feelings with this girl.

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Michael CH

I hear you man - I know exactly what you are going through. I've had pimples all my life - but for some reason, I never really cared too much about it. In my head, I thought it would get better 'when I was older'. And to some extent, my acne did improve. For the past year or so, I've been quite 'clear', without really doing much - I thought the acne was gone! I would occasionally get pimples on my jawline and my forehead, but it was no biggie. However, recently, I had a terrible break out all over my face, with cysts on my forehead, nose and cheeks. This initial break out left me with hyperpigmented scars on my forehead and on my cheek bone area. Though those pimples have subsided, I'm not getting several pimples on my cheeks each week (I Never had pimples on my cheeks prior!)

I'm definitely a different person after this whole experience and I don't think its for the better. Prior to my recent acne breakout, I was satisfied with everything and excited about life. I graduated from a great school, I'm living in NYC, I have great friends, I have a great family, my social life was terrific. I went out mostly every weekend and got together with friends. I was such a relaxed, easy going person. Most of all, I was confident of who I was, inside and out.

But now, with this acne problem, I've gone through a total emotional transformation. At first I didn't care too much about my acne problem, because I always thought that the dermatologist can fix it with pills or something. However, after several failed attempts with the dermatologist and several bad reactions to oral meds, I slowly started to realize the hopelessness of my situation. Acne is just something I need to deal with and the changes it makes to my face is something I need to accept. When I came to that conclusion, things started to go downhill. I stopped going out, I stopped talking to my friends - at one point, I was actually depressed - I didn't want to leave my room for 2 weeks. Whenever I got home from work, I would close my door and go to sleep - I would probably sleep for more than 10 hours each day. I stopped going to the gym, I stopped eating properly, I stopped taking care of myself. :(

I'm getting better each day, but I'm still saddened by the idea that I can't walk around with the same confidence that I had 3 months ago. I don't look the same - and I know people are going to judge me for that. Sometimes, I look at myself now and I can't believe that I have these feelings and emotions! It sounds so dramatic and vain - but I can't seem to get over it.

HI

I'm feeling so bad and so sad at the moment being back to acne.org. Don't get me wrong, this is a great community, but there were times I thought I was all over this. My acne is just light at the moment, but my self-confidence will be destroyed forever.

I'm 25 now and educational-wise very succesful. I've achieved everything I wanted and I will be doing the job I've always dreamed of and of which I know could make me happy forever.

But, I'm my biggest enemy..probably since acne...I hate my looks, I hate myself and I cannot do anything against it. Even though most people I ask think I'm good looking or even hot...but I don't. I cannot look in a mirror I don't know and I especially cannot look at pictures. It's not just my skin anymore...it's my hair, my face...I think I look too young and way worse than all other guys in my class. I've had 1 girlfriend (3 years) and another one just for 4 weeks so far..when I started this new school 1 year ago everything seemed to improve. I was more popular than at home because I've started trying being more open etc. I even had this 4-week relationship back than. But soon everything fell apart. And it got worse and worse again. Now I feel so lonely..here I'm living abroad and just know the people of my class...in the evening I'm often alone...my friends from home hardly ever write me and except of my mother I hardly get any sms.

And now summer comes..and I hate summer..probably since my acne time...I feel even worse now, more alone and more special than before. Nobody around me probably notices all this. But I would like to be way more popular..I would love to greet almost everybody in school, get sms daily from friends. But it seems that hardly anyone cares if I'm even alive or not. For that matter I don't even care..I'm just living because I have to basically...

Years ago when I had acne and my problems started I always thought in some years all this will be over, I will have a family and live happily ever after. Now I'm approaching my 26th birthday and nothing changed. Not my relationship to friends, not my acne and in my opinion not even my looks, I still look the same age as back then. I'm getting afraid that my life will never change. I'm stuck in an never-ending nightmare. I've missed so much in my life...I've never been for a long time abroad or backpacking or anything else because I've always had my daily routine because of acne (and as stupid as it sounds as a guy) my hair. I've never had many girlfriends, I've never slept at a beach, I've missed on so much stuff. And now 25 years have passed...some friends are already married and I'm continuing on my miserable path...and I cannot escape. I just can't. Sometimes I hope this life is all a dream and I wake up and think "oh thank god it was just all a dream"...but unfortunately it works exactly opposite...I go to bed in the evening and think oh thank god I can forget about my whole life for the next 8 hours...

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This is exactly how I feel. I feel like my whole life has basically been stolen. The acne ruined everything. I've had it for as long as I can remember, since before elementary school, the doctors always said it would go away, but they were either wrong or lying to make me feel better. People stare at me. They avoid me. When I talk to them they try so hard to act natural and be nice but it's so obvious they can't get past it and just aren't sure how to act. I hate it. I've tried everything too. And I mean EVERYTHING. Even accutane didn't work for me.

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least you got thru school

my issues caused so much distress that I couldnt even get a degree.

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make a list of realistic goals you would like to do within the next year and look at the list every morning and then act upon them and trust me...the first goal acheivement will feel sooo good and it will motivate you to do the other ones

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make a list of realistic goals you would like to do within the next year and look at the list every morning and then act upon them and trust me...the first goal acheivement will feel sooo good and it will motivate you to do the other ones

spot on. exactly what i did

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I'm almost 23. Only just got my acne under control. My best years have gone. That's depressing.

Would be even more depressing if you honestly believed that. The mid twenties don't sound too bad. You'll still be young enough to go out and have a good time. A little more wiser, and a lot stronger.

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