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bethanyd

Why I'm I so jealous? And how do I stop?

OMG, why I'm I jealous about a 14 year old. So there is this 8th grader I know who is very pretty and she has all these friends and she can get any guy she wants. First this preppy college student comes to her house and they are hanging out. Now like the hottest guy in the world whats to date her. Shes not a whore they just like her for her personalty and looks. It sucks because im 18 and I have been told I look 12 and guys never say I'm good looking. Also im really shy so i don't really have friends and guys aren't attracted to me cuz of my seemingly boring personality. anytime there are really pretty girls I'm always jealous and I don't want to be. I know its horrible but i feel so hopeless at times.

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I think the biggest thing is to stop comparing yourself to other people, and wanting what they have; or better put, what you "think" they have. You only set yourself up for failure when you compare to others, or get into a competition with other women.

Take an honest stock of yourself and your attributes, find things about yourself that you like and stand out like talents, abilities, looks/features, interests, etc.. You say you want to look older? Try and find ways to do that without going overboard. Did it ever dawn on you that a whole lot of older women want to look much younger than they are now? Ever see any of the plastic surgery disasters in the media? You'll value your youthful looks someday. And of course your reply is, "Someday isn't now!" No, it's not and it never will be BTW. So you have to find ways of being happy inside yourself rather than envious of others.

Only you can love yourself, no one can love you & live in you. That's your job- accepting yourself and making yourself happy, nothing and no one outside of you is going to make you happy. It just doesn't happen.

You say you're "really shy." Know what other people like to talk about? Themselves, yeah that's right take an interest in other people, ask them questions or get their opinion on something going on in their lives, LISTEN to them and you'll find a LOT of friends.

Folllow your interests, you'll meet people who have something in common with you. Think positive loving thoughts about yourself, look into the mirror and say affirmations. Be proactive, and when you notice yourself getting envious about other women, STOP, reset yourself and your thinking to something positive.

Volunteer your time, help someone out, be of service to others. You'll feel better about yourself and you'll make some new friends at the same time. Follow your instincts and intuition. Female intution isn't just a myth. Keep learning and embrace life, stop pushing it away.

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