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apparently from i've learned in the few days i've been hanging out in this website is that there are "stages" that many of us with acne go through.

please would you be so kind to help me make a chart that althought may not be accurate for everyone would really help some poeple who like me didn't know what the fuck to expect at the beginning of all of this?

here is my chart of the emotional stages i went through, please contribute,

1) realizing that your acne does not longer come and go but is here to stay.

2) start worrying about it more and begin to look for products/diets that may help.

3) after using one failed product/diet, trying a couple of more and realizing that this is a serious condition.

4) after recognizing that this problem goes beyond your reach, start to notice that this has affected the way the opposite gender looks you.

5) right after realizing this, loss of interest in going out or making new friends. first symptoms of depression start showing.

6) heavy depression, feeling of helplessness amplifies, start thinking about your problem everyday many times a day.

7) acne improves a little bit just so that it can come back way worse than before.

8) total loss of hope, depression becomes part of your daily life, suicidal thoughts, acne seems to be getting worse and worse.

9) either giving up and conforming to live in the shadows, or keep on fighting acne through medication and diets even if little or none progress is shown.

10) recognize once again that this problem is out of your reach, this time, your attitude is less negative, you can keep fighting or just do nothing about it and keep on living.

11) whether your acne's improved or not, you can now function and live your life with little hope that someday you'll be cure.

hope some people can relate to what i'm talking about and maybe correct me if i'm missing something or something is not accurate or clear enough.

thank you for reading,

shallowbastard.

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Wow I'm sorry you've had suicidal thoughts over acne, that's messed up.

As for me, there is no chart of emotional stages. I just started getting zits at 13, people made fun of me, I was sad about it, tried trillions of products, none worked, I began to just accept it although it made me self conscious...then I got on birth control, it made my zits less but there are still some ALWAYS, I've just accepted that that's how it is and hopefully it will go away with age. And now I'm on Dan's regimen, so not much else to say.

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i don't know if you can really break acne and it's effects into "stages." everyone experiences things too differently. i'd say these are more just common feelings we have at one time shared.

i, myself, have never experienced numbers 4, 8, 9, or 10.

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Wow I'm sorry you've had suicidal thoughts over acne, that's messed up.

dont worry, i've never attempted to kill my self or anything like that but i sure thought about it, not as an option but because i felt good to think about dying.

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Wow I'm sorry you've had suicidal thoughts over acne, that's messed up.

dont worry, i've never attempted to kill my self or anything like that but i sure thought about it, not as an option but because i felt good to think about dying.

I hope not......ending your life because of dots on your face. Ridiculous. You need to find a chick who loves you for you lol, it would help you more than you know.

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i don't know if you can really break acne and it's effects into "stages." everyone experiences things too differently. i'd say these are more just common feelings we have at one time shared.

i, myself, have never experienced numbers 4, 8, 9, or 10.

you definitely dogded some of the worse bullets for me, i know what you're talking about when you say each case is different but i'm sure everyone identifies with at least one or two of the "stages" i talk about.

if it doesn't apply to anybody then at least i shared my personal mind stages for the past 3 years.

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Wow I'm sorry you've had suicidal thoughts over acne, that's messed up.

dont worry, i've never attempted to kill my self or anything like that but i sure thought about it, not as an option but because i felt good to think about dying.

I hope not......ending your life because of dots on your face. Ridiculous. You need to find a chick who loves you for you lol, it would help you more than you know.

haha i havent had a real relationship in the past 2 years not only because of my acne but because i havent met anybody who im quite attracted to (personally). i wouldnt kill my self over anything but as said before, it felt good to think about not existing.

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Wow I'm sorry you've had suicidal thoughts over acne, that's messed up.

dont worry, i've never attempted to kill my self or anything like that but i sure thought about it, not as an option but because i felt good to think about dying.

I hope not......ending your life because of dots on your face. Ridiculous. You need to find a chick who loves you for you lol, it would help you more than you know.

haha i havent had a real relationship in the past 2 years not only because of my acne but because i havent met anybody who im quite attracted to (personally). i wouldnt kill my self over anything but as said before, it felt good to think about not existing.

That doesn't mean jack squat. I hate when people say that they haven't met the right person yet, so that means they never will. Your life isn't even close to being over, there is no rush, so don't worry!

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Wow I'm sorry you've had suicidal thoughts over acne, that's messed up.

dont worry, i've never attempted to kill my self or anything like that but i sure thought about it, not as an option but because i felt good to think about dying.

I hope not......ending your life because of dots on your face. Ridiculous. You need to find a chick who loves you for you lol, it would help you more than you know.

haha i havent had a real relationship in the past 2 years not only because of my acne but because i havent met anybody who im quite attracted to (personally). i wouldnt kill my self over anything but as said before, it felt good to think about not existing.

That doesn't mean jack squat. I hate when people say that they haven't met the right person yet, so that means they never will. Your life isn't even close to being over, there is no rush, so don't worry!

i meant i haven't met anyone i really like in the past two years :lol: i had a girlfriend for almost a year before and that was probably one of the best relationships i had in my life :wub:

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Wow I'm sorry you've had suicidal thoughts over acne, that's messed up.

dont worry, i've never attempted to kill my self or anything like that but i sure thought about it, not as an option but because i felt good to think about dying.

I hope not......ending your life because of dots on your face. Ridiculous. You need to find a chick who loves you for you lol, it would help you more than you know.

haha i havent had a real relationship in the past 2 years not only because of my acne but because i havent met anybody who im quite attracted to (personally). i wouldnt kill my self over anything but as said before, it felt good to think about not existing.

That doesn't mean jack squat. I hate when people say that they haven't met the right person yet, so that means they never will. Your life isn't even close to being over, there is no rush, so don't worry!

i meant i haven't met anyone i really like in the past two years :lol: i had a girlfriend for almost a year before and that was probably one of the best relationships i had in my life :wub:

I know, but you will, we all do, whether were out looking or not. At least you had one good relationship, too bad it didn't work out. Maybe it was cuz you were a shallow bastard? LOL.

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i kinda agree with what you say, but ive never had the physiological anguish that some long term suffers get (ive only had acne, albeit pretty severe, for 1 1/2 years). for me these were the steps in my acne journey...

1)accepting that i had acne. slowly more and more spots crept on my face, and in hindsight, i was in denial. i thought "im 16, everyone gets a few spots". then one day it hit me that it was something more, and acknowledging you have acne is probably one of the hardest steps. after all, i always thought of acne as something that happened to others (my friends had it, but i had reached 16 with pretty good skin). how naive i was...

2) start to back away socially as acne progressively gets worse.

3) i started to get on top of it, and hoped for clear skin soon....-ish. all the time, any vanity i had was seeping away.

4) acne returns with a vengeance!! :redface: start the obsessive behaviour

5) finally, after over a year of terrible skin, i at last realise no-one gives a crap apart from me - i moved school (which is ssooooo hard to do if you have bad skin), but i still made some friends. finally accept that it's gonna take time to fix, and might as well live life in between.

so that's how i would sum it up for me. there were (and will be) bad days, but i think the longer im plagued with it, in a weird way, the more im getting used to it and the easier it is to accept it.

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I've been in almost all of those stages--except for the last one unfortunately...

The suicidal feelings are not just about the "dots." Acne is just the last straw that breaks the camel's back, so to speak. Everything wrong with myself gets compounded. Its like every flaw in my personality, in my abilities, and in my appearance is personified by these marks on my face. They BECOME the part of me I want to get rid of, but never seems to go away, and even when they do, they leave scars.

The idea of just not being here anymore is sometimes appealing. Like if you feel that you are just a blight on the world inside and out and it would be better for everyone if you just "poofed" out of existence. I know I've asked God to kill me more than a few times, and take me somewhere safe away from everyone and everything else. I want to be in a place where I can be myself, and there are no people there to watch and criticize.

Is that heaven? I don't know, but it's sure nice to think about.

As far as killing myself goes, I'm honestly too much of a coward to ever actually do it.

Oh, look, another flaw... Its like finding pimples in the morning...

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I know, but you will, we all do, whether were out looking or not. At least you had one good relationship, too bad it didn't work out. Maybe it was cuz you were a shallow bastard? LOL.

ha-ha :doubt: lmao i guess it could be a possibility :lol: but i did work for a year, it was probably the closest to love i've ever experienced.

i think i also really like this other chick i met in my sophomore year, but she is now pregnant.

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been at 9 for a year now....

and ya "dots" r not a good way to put it... Its more like drastically scratched at cysts all over ur cheeks that lead the the reddest, deepest (or inflamed...est) scabs and pimples..

ya i wish i jus got ..."dots"

and suicide comes to mine too. I keep breaking out..cant handle it. I wish there was something like somewhat-suicide... where u could die and wake up in ur late 20s...grown out of acne. I just wanna skip this bullshit time..and i dont think ill even outgrow it, cuz my parents still have a lil acne

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I agree with you thuglife. My dad said he still got pimples at the age of 28, and my mom used to get breakouts in her 30's. I'm always waiting for that imminent outbreak of pimples and whiteheads to test my patience. Acne beats me down and doesn't give me a chance to get up. The scars are a reminder of your acne, and you're stuck with them for the rest of your life. It's like punishment for something you were powerless to control.

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I'll try to remember all of the psychological stages i had to go through since 12 years old.

1. My friend started getting blackheads while I was still clear. I didn't know what the huge deal was with it.

2. Started getting acne. Sudden realization about the condition of my face. Shock.

3. Started going for facial at the age of 13. Said my acne would go away in few months. Was pretty much in average mood, because i took it as a normal course of puberty and was convinced that it would go away.

4. Realized that it was all going downhill after few months had passed and a boy in my class made fun of me calling me a "rotting corpse". Was in 8th grade. His friend sat beside him and his face was only slightly better than mine. I could see that the comment not only hurt me, but him too. Really started hating humanity.

5. 9th grade, 14 years old. Went to bed every evening hoping not to wake up. Became very suicidal, mutilated myself, my hair was cut so that at any given time you could see no more than half of my face.

6. Father had a stroke. Became really withdrawn from everyone, didn't really care about anything for a while. Had a lot to deal with besides acne.

7. Sudden salvation. Face was almost clear (no paupules or pustules and the whiteheads were manageable). Lasted for a year. Was happy, liked socializing. Slowly started getting over my salf-mutilation problems, had a boyfriend. I didn't even mind my back being hellish.

8. And once more all goes downhill. Suddenly my face started getting worse and worse. At first I managed to tolerate it since my back was actually getting better. It was this summer. Went to festival, even had the courage to be in a swimsuit around my friends and just have fun.

9. And it's rock bottom once more. Depression. Autumn, my favourite season. My face looked AWFUL. Worse than ever before. But I managed to stay away from self-mutilation (though not the suicidal thoughts) by doing some rather stupid thing. Like getting drunk and asking out a guy I found attractive for few years.

10. December. Made peace with my terrible skin. I decided that even if it was all pussfilled, red, rough and overall vomit-inducing I managed to spark interest in someone I always thought of as being "out of my league". Decided that for one last time i would bother going to the derm. I gave up on my skin getting better, just didn't want it worse.

11. First few days of skin clearing up after i just started my regimen. Shock, fright, depression. I couldn't believe my skin was getting better, every night i would go to sleep crying thinking that fate was just trying to give me some hope so it could trample it in few days time.

12. For the last few weeks: Joy. Life seems to be going a lot easier now. It's still hard due to a lot of stress at school, some social problems with friends, but it's tolerable since i no longer have the idea of acne looming above my every thought. I'm slowly letting myself hope that the clear skin is here to stay.

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