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I have been fighting this for ten years... I have tried everything and my derm thinks my only option left is accutane.

My case is a little tricky. I coded 8 years ago and I have an implanted defibb. It shocks my heart when it stops, I have had three blood clots that almost killed me so I should be happy just to be alive.. and I am!! I have gained 80 pounds in ayear and have suffered from major depression. So Im scared of accutane. Im depressed because I take so many cardiac meds and on top of this I wont go any where because I look like a freak. My face actually hurts from all the cystic and nodular acne. Its so humiliating.

Im waiting for the blood work and am on more antibiotics to try to get it calmed down before the accutane storm begins. I think I get it at the end of this month.

I have fought hard for my life.. I dont want to kill myself over acne meds.. Im already pretty down.. can anyone offer advise? I was sooo pretty just a year ago. I feel disfigured.. Im ashamed.. pics really dont do it justice.

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