Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...

i wanna tell a story of my life and wishing it could change a person life. and to hope some people to stop doing stupid things. i read some forum in here and its depressing and i understand it all.

well it started in 6th grade when i grew some pimple on the nose and the kid tease me calling me "red nose the rain deer." thats when i felt insecure.

Then 7th grade started i didnt grow any acne except some red mark on the nose. I dont know why girl wanna talk to me and ask me out.i really felt insecure and i dont think im worthy to be with them.

8th grade i break out so much. student ask me why i have so much acne? i was so embarrass i didnt say anything. when i break out so much i went to a family doctor. hes like "damn, you have sooo much acne" then he gave me some cream medication. well in 8th grade so many people make fun of me even the kids look at me funny. even my friend called me ugly and crap. in my mind i talk to myself (i know im ugly. you think i dont know. why do people have to say it? Does it make them feel better?). I kept saying to myself life is long and i hope to find a better days.

well 9th grade started i grew acne on my check and i wear hood so i dont want people to stare at me. I HATE PEOPLE THAT STARE AT ME. 9th grade, im sooo quiet in class and i dont wanna talk to anyone. well in P.E. some kid accidently touch my face and hes like "ewwww, i touch his face" so then he ran after the girls and try to touch them with the hand he touch my face. the girl was shouting "ahhhhhh, dont touch me ewwww" so yea i kept telling myself i'll find a better days.

10th grade started, i went to the doctor so much to change medication my mother is embarrass to go with me. she said to me "why dont you be the doctor son?i should give you to him since he want a son." it hurt me so much til now. i remember every words buh i dont blame her she raise me. the only person i should blame is myself not being the son she wanted. well i like this one girl since 7th to 10th grade and i wanted to ask her out buh i dont seem to have the courage. i dont want to regret in the future not asking her out and not knowing the answer. i give my self a chance and yea i ask her out buh she didnt said anything she change the subject. i know she dont wanna hurt me and i adore her even though she rejected me. she didnt laugh at me and my friend thinks she pretty too. for serious im a picky person. well i took accutane and it suck. i stop the medication cuzz i could felt some pressure in my head and it hurts. i went to the doctor to check if i should continue. well he said to me "i rather die as being pretty". accutane have so many side effect. after drinking it i think i have a mental problem. Oh yea one time i was in the waiting room some woman say "damn you have so many acne" my mom was there. she just turn her head trying to ignore. my father make fun of my in some resturarant "theres your friend" he said that to me cuzz some acne kid walk in. 10th grade is the worst year. all day i do is sleep in bed cuzz i wanna dream of the person i like (no lies) i lost like 20 pounds. everyday of my life is like a repeat school, home,sleep, eat, and sleep. i didnt do homework. in the spring my friend called me to hangout and i appreciated; they help me get through it. so yea i gave myself chance i give the girl i like some clue i know she knows it after some several talk she ignore me. i understand. oh yea i wore make up to cover my scar (yea im a boy) but i stop. and no im not gay. Some mexican kid siad "you wear make up?" i was like "yea?" hes said "NICE" LMAO anyway also i cut myself cuzz i hate my self soo much. As time pass by, the pain goes away buh when i look in the mirror i ask god why im so ugly? i didnt do anything sinful.

so in the summer i met some girl and i like her she held my hand and all. my friend said she likes me. she was average looking. yea im human i judge. i know who is beautiful or not. I ask her out "will you be my girlfriend" yea kinda childish. im so embarass cuzz all my friend was there. she dont want me to get embarass. she didnt answer. i was kinda depress. i know no girl want me. soo all of us went to a park and hangout. she was there too. i got drunk cuzz i dont wanna feel the pain buh when you drink it felt warm. yea after my friend drove me home. i chatted with her she said "you are ugly and i was just having fun. dont mistake of me liking you. i will never like you"

the pain of each year is getting worse. sometime i cried at night buh its alright everyone cries. i dont wanna bottle it up inside.

11th grade i dont care about anything in life and what people think of me. i made sooo much enemy in high school through senior buh yea i didnt grew much acne as i did. got into soo much fight cuzz i hate this world. I HATE EVERYONE. THEY MADE ME WHO I AM. let them hate me. i learn that i rather save an animal lives rather than a human lives. human judge, kill, betray, and hurt other people. while animal just want to survive. human do more evil deeds than helping out others. i am and still is isolated from the world. the media expect a standard beauty and life style and everyone is being brain wash by propaganda.

12th grade passed, i miss out so much cuzz of acne. winter formal, prom and graduation. im still living cuzz i wanna continue this journey cuzz everything happen for a reason. im wanna live cuzz i dont want to loose to anyone due to they judgement of me. i have pride in life cuzz i dont wanna choose some random girl that i dont like or love and get marry or be in a relationship with. Im still here to search for the person i love. i rather love someone than they love me cuzz i feel so uncomtfortable when someone treat me nice. in reality, both person dont love each. one of the person love and the other dont. i been through soo much.and seen many things and its depressing. sometime i make fun of myself to my friend saying "you wanna hangout with me cuzz i make you look good huh?" they laugh and we all laugh i dont care much of other. im loosing friend every year now i have no one. i just go fishing at the pier til night. keeps me sane. they have girlfriend and all. Im not worry if i die alone cuzz life goes by fast. now i grow pimple once in awhile. a few scar buh i consider myself alright buh still hidious. But sometime i dont know why i am here. it doesnt matter if i live cuzz everyone die sooner or later. and i ask myself "if you die early the less pain and stress you have to go through." buh just continue with life see wuh happen. NOTE* Do not have kid if both of you have acne cuzz the kid gonna be depress you just hurting them.

so many comment of me being ugly its like countless

Edited by guidingStar

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

wow dud that was uuuuummm depressing. Are you still struggeling with acne? B/c you've still got a whole life to start living. You've got many many many more years to live. Do what I do drink green tea and kill acne from within, then use cetaphil to gently clean skin, finnally use 2.5% bp spot treatment. Find a fun activity where you meet people. Get a girlfriend. Skrew her good, then skrew her again for me. Get married and live Happily ever after.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Alright guidingStar telling it like it is. I became like that back in H.S school and I took acne pain to a whole knew level back in 1999 and wrote about on this board. Screw those people who dare call me a nut case. Acne is one of the worse things a person can through. Now since June 1998 I'm finally getting to look like me again. In a few more months I will. But it took this long. Remember never give up hope no matter if at times you just want to byte off someone's nose and spit it in their dam face.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

dang man. sounds like you had it pretty rough. you gotta remember that the Lord constantly tests our faith in Him. All i can say is trust in the Lord, Jesus Christ and he will give you joy. You gotta understand that the Lord blesses each person with different abilities and talents. He says "blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven." God laid out a plan for our salvaton, God gave His only begotten Son to die on the cross, "so that no man should perish, but that all may have eternal life." Basically what im saying is that all of mankind's sins were paid for at the cross, and that all of man's struggles and difficulties were addressed at the cross. If you want to know more check out the link below. I know Jesus is real cuz he changed my life!!!

God bless you!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your story is unbelievable. I cant believe how badly people treated you. I cant believe even your dad and mum would say such things to you. You said "everyday of my life is like a repeat school, home,sleep, eat, and sleep" it is what I used to do when I had severe acne, I was so depressed all I wanted to do was sleep just like you. And during that period I lost basicly all my friends and now even though I no longer have severe acne I barely have any friends. People have said sooo many bad things to me BUT NO ONE HAS EVER CALLED ME UGLY. I could not believe so many people would call you ugly. I am so sorry no one cares about your feelings.

You said "everything happen for a reason" it is also what I believe too.

You want to find a person you love which is also what I want to do. My dream is to find a girl I love and get married. I used to have dreams which would never come true which made me really depressed because I feel there is no point in living my life. But I meet this girl who I really love and she changed me. I will probably never see her again but I dream of meeting another girl like her who I really love and we could get married.

I am sure you would find a girl you love and she would also love you back. I am sure you are good looking because you said " I dont know why girl wanna talk to me and ask me out".

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry bro, sad how badly people treated you. Your own family is supposed to support you and empathize. I think the most important thing is to keep doing what you suggested to improving skin, and keep finding new hobbies but enjoying your favorite ones. I love fishing myself, and it can be very peaceful and calming. Maybe when you're fishing just try thinking about all the good qualities of yourself and your talents. Think about how you're a good guy and everyday just try to build your confidence a little more so you can go out and try to meet new people. Strike up conversations with random people, like a cashier at a grocery store for instance. People tend to be very judgmental until they see your true inside. I have some acne, but my friends know me as a funny guy who likes to have fun and shares the same interests. Once people can see your true personality if you can build up some confidence it will really help your self-esteem. Just realize you can get through it and that it is a test. I feel bad, but everyone here can empathize so just let all your feelings out. Make sure you keep close with your friend right now too, it will help. Tell people that insult you how you feel about that, and tell them to think about your situation and what you are dealing with. Good luck to you man, and keep strong.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i've been called ugly more than once. It makes it tough finding a girlfriend like that. When you have acne, you never know whether they're staring at you because they're in love or if they're repulsed. But, if you look in the right places, there are women out there who are staring at you because they like you. You'll just have to take the risk of making a fool of yourself. But in spite of all this, i've been around plenty (relative to people like me) of women. By no means am I bragging, because if we want to make this a competition, then I'd been one of the last guys in the race, but still, getting women is not impossible, like your post seems to suggest. good luck, keep on keeping on. and remember, self-pity blinds intuition, acceptance binds self-guidance.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i got tears in my eyes reading this. ur writing style is differenet, and i mean that in a good way.

from reading yout post, it is clear that you are hopeless, and feel presdestined to fail. u seem to have little faith, e.g., when you say life is short. life is forever. a man without hope is a man who needs a religion

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok this is a joke right? This entire post looks like its made by a 10 year old and his first language is definately not english. Im choosing not to believe in this post because it seems like a complete joke. I have no sympathy. Even if this were real you could of at least typed it out like an intelligent human being.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You are still young man, don't think that you are hopeless because you aren't. A lot of the stuff you said is inside your head. When you said that everybody thinks that you are ugly, well how do you know? Many might have said it, but I'm sure there are plenty that think you are completely normal (with some acne problems) maybe even beautiful. Life is going to get easier because people will mature, and there is a good chance you won't have acne in the next year or two. Many people stop having real acne problems when they get into their early twenties. There is a good chance that you are one of those people. Overall people will not be as cruel to you, even if you have those problems. However, even right now I'm sure that you can find some sort of treatment that will work for you. Don't give up. The people that fix their acne are the people that are persistent. They try many different methods, and finally find one that works.

I know it's harder to change your life than it sounds. It always is. I'm struggling with my depression over acne as well. But you have to keep trying. Trust me, one day you will be happy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know that a lot of people here can relate. My acne started when I was a Junior in High school. Luckly, I had pretty good friends. They never made comments to my face or anything and I still carried the same friends from year to year. Only thing I noticed was that girls would sometimes stare at me..ya know...just curious about the acne.

People here will swear that if they didn't have acne, then they would have a bf/gf. That is not always true. We all love to feel sorry for ourselves and make excuses.

Think of it this way, we have acne and that opportunity cost is having a clean face. A man who lost his legs can no longer walk and I'm sure he thinks about it all the time and not his face. Basically what I am trying to say is to count your blessings. It is OK to know your faults and try to correct them, but don't concentrate so hard on your flaws, but rather what you do have.

Trust me, I had sever acne (probably mild, but compared to a clean face and the hundreds of kids who don't have acne) and still do 3 years later and not a day goes by that I am conscience of it, but I really try hard for it to not get me down.

Don't think about getting a gf/bf my friends...that is not the holy grail. Try something new, travel somewhere, begin a project, pickup a hobby, educate yourself.

Just last night I made out with a girl (I'm not one to be boastful, but for the purpose of making a point) and all I could think about was, "holy crap! This is really happening...but I swore to myself that this would never happen....this can't be happening...nah, she will forget tomorw because we both are drunk" That instant just reminded me that I still am conscience of my appearance and that got me reallllllly down.

No one can tell you how to act and you shouldn't base your actions on what someone tells you, but take into consideration what some users on here will tell you.

BTW,

-college is a lot better than high school

-Nothing is predetermined! You were not put on this planet to do some goal in life. I hate it when people think that is it merely destiny. I myself am an atheist in part due to that whole, "You are here because Jesus thinks you will do well here"...plus carbon dating and well....college will educate you I will just say (plus I will cut off here cause we don't need religious zealots comin here)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The above poster is right, college is a lot better.

While I was reading this, I kinda wondered if your from a small town maybe? I was fortunate to always live in big cities, but unfortunately no matter where you are you will run into the few jerks out there. You have a lot of time, and a lot to look forward to. So don't let people get you down. I've been there and with time you'll get through it. I started my acne when I was in 7th grade and was one of the only people with such a bad case in my school. I was really depressed my freshmen year of high school, and ended up skipping a lot because of some bad experiences. What really did hit home of what you said was the sleep. I slept so much, it was ridiculous. I wanted to dream, of a better me or just about anything but reality. But once you find the right friends, and are confident with who you are the others don't make a difference/ Good luck to you. Think positively and don't let the people around you get you down. If anything this will make you a better person, and your able to eliminate out the people who dont deserve to be in your life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thats a really raw post, brings up a lot of sad memories for me, though it sounds like your journey through high school was more troubled then mine.

There has been some good advice on here, but I think for someone who writes the way you do, maybe feel all this positive talk is too optimistic?

All this shit makes you change, and something slowly dies inside your soul, everything is negative, it almosts like like a piss take when you hear people saying your life could be different.

i think your first step to pulling yourself out of this mess is to really make a resolution to change, its the new 2009, so why dont you make 2009 be your first step to rebuilding your life?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

im soo sorry bout the thinqs that you been thoruqhh..

and dont worry .. your not alonee. looks are not all that counts.. its what you are in the inside.

i do have a boyfriend and everythinq , i have friends , but latley i been breaking out and mi boyfriends friend are like

:eww your girlfriend has so much acne".

nd yah it hurts and everythinq. but fuck them

kouse that just makes them assholes. people that hurt other people are just rude and there qona qet their karamaa. one way or another.

and i dont understand why people say "dammm why do you have so much acne" like we decied to wake up and just have acne like its up to us rigth. we don t know why we have acnee and some people dont.

i think i have it becaouse mi mom has acne 2 but its not bad.

but life qoese onn.

and all we can ddo is bee stronqq/ :surprised:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
i wanna tell a story of my life and wishing it could change a person life. and to hope some people to stop doing stupid things. i read some forum in here and its depressing and i understand it all.

well it started in 6th grade when i grew some pimple on the nose and the kid tease me calling me "red nose the rain deer." thats when i felt insecure.

Then 7th grade started i didnt grow any acne except some red mark on the nose. I dont know why girl wanna talk to me and ask me out.i really felt insecure and i dont think im worthy to be with them.

8th grade i break out so much. student ask me why i have so much acne? i was so embarrass i didnt say anything. when i break out so much i went to a family doctor. hes like "damn, you have sooo much acne" then he gave me some cream medication. well in 8th grade so many people make fun of me even the kids look at me funny. even my friend called me ugly and crap. in my mind i talk to myself (i know im ugly. you think i dont know. why do people have to say it? Does it make them feel better?). I kept saying to myself life is long and i hope to find a better days.

well 9th grade started i grew acne on my check and i wear hood so i dont want people to stare at me. I HATE PEOPLE THAT STARE AT ME. 9th grade, im sooo quiet in class and i dont wanna talk to anyone. well in P.E. some kid accidently touch my face and hes like "ewwww, i touch his face" so then he ran after the girls and try to touch them with the hand he touch my face. the girl was shouting "ahhhhhh, dont touch me ewwww" so yea i kept telling myself i'll find a better days.

10th grade started, i went to the doctor so much to change medication my mother is embarrass to go with me. she said to me "why dont you be the doctor son?i should give you to him since he want a son." it hurt me so much til now. i remember every words buh i dont blame her she raise me. the only person i should blame is myself not being the son she wanted. well i like this one girl since 7th to 10th grade and i wanted to ask her out buh i dont seem to have the courage. i dont want to regret in the future not asking her out and not knowing the answer. i give my self a chance and yea i ask her out buh she didnt said anything she change the subject. i know she dont wanna hurt me and i adore her even though she rejected me. she didnt laugh at me and my friend thinks she pretty too. for serious im a picky person. well i took accutane and it suck. i stop the medication cuzz i could felt some pressure in my head and it hurts. i went to the doctor to check if i should continue. well he said to me "i rather die as being pretty". accutane have so many side effect. after drinking it i think i have a mental problem. Oh yea one time i was in the waiting room some woman say "damn you have so many acne" my mom was there. she just turn her head trying to ignore. my father make fun of my in some resturarant "theres your friend" he said that to me cuzz some acne kid walk in. 10th grade is the worst year. all day i do is sleep in bed cuzz i wanna dream of the person i like (no lies) i lost like 20 pounds. everyday of my life is like a repeat school, home,sleep, eat, and sleep. i didnt do homework. in the spring my friend called me to hangout and i appreciated; they help me get through it. so yea i gave myself chance i give the girl i like some clue i know she knows it after some several talk she ignore me. i understand. oh yea i wore make up to cover my scar (yea im a boy) but i stop. and no im not gay. Some mexican kid siad "you wear make up?" i was like "yea?" hes said "NICE" LMAO anyway also i cut myself cuzz i hate my self soo much. As time pass by, the pain goes away buh when i look in the mirror i ask god why im so ugly? i didnt do anything sinful.

so in the summer i met some girl and i like her she held my hand and all. my friend said she likes me. she was average looking. yea im human i judge. i know who is beautiful or not. I ask her out "will you be my girlfriend" yea kinda childish. im so embarass cuzz all my friend was there. she dont want me to get embarass. she didnt answer. i was kinda depress. i know no girl want me. soo all of us went to a park and hangout. she was there too. i got drunk cuzz i dont wanna feel the pain buh when you drink it felt warm. yea after my friend drove me home. i chatted with her she said "you are ugly and i was just having fun. dont mistake of me liking you. i will never like you"

the pain of each year is getting worse. sometime i cried at night buh its alright everyone cries. i dont wanna bottle it up inside.

11th grade i dont care about anything in life and what people think of me. i made sooo much enemy in high school through senior buh yea i didnt grew much acne as i did. got into soo much fight cuzz i hate this world. I HATE EVERYONE. THEY MADE ME WHO I AM. let them hate me. i learn that i rather save an animal lives rather than a human lives. human judge, kill, betray, and hurt other people. while animal just want to survive. human do more evil deeds than helping out others. i am and still is isolated from the world. the media expect a standard beauty and life style and everyone is being brain wash by propaganda.

12th grade passed, i miss out so much cuzz of acne. winter formal, prom and graduation. im still living cuzz i wanna continue this journey cuzz everything happen for a reason. im wanna live cuzz i dont want to loose to anyone due to they judgement of me. i have pride in life cuzz i dont wanna choose some random girl that i dont like or love and get marry or be in a relationship with. Im still here to search for the person i love. i rather love someone than they love me cuzz i feel so uncomtfortable when someone treat me nice. in reality, both person dont love each. one of the person love and the other dont. i been through soo much.and seen many things and its depressing. sometime i make fun of myself to my friend saying "you wanna hangout with me cuzz i make you look good huh?" they laugh and we all laugh i dont care much of other. im loosing friend every year now i have no one. i just go fishing at the pier til night. keeps me sane. they have girlfriend and all. Im not worry if i die alone cuzz life goes by fast. now i grow pimple once in awhile. a few scar buh i consider myself alright buh still hidious. But sometime i dont know why i am here. it doesnt matter if i live cuzz everyone die sooner or later. and i ask myself "if you die early the less pain and stress you have to go through." buh just continue with life see wuh happen. NOTE* Do not have kid if both of you have acne cuzz the kid gonna be depress you just hurting them.

so many comment of me being ugly its like countless

little help of getting rid of acne:

1. Do not touch your face; if you must pop it clean your hands and use a clean clothes to wrap around finger to pop. After poping, use a some tolet paper to clean blood and PLEASE SHOWER AFTERWARD.

2. shower after exercise

3. shower 2- 3 times a day (morning, noon, before sleep)

4. Do not cover your face with your blanket.

5. Use a t-shirt to cover your pillow every 2 day (flip the side of the pillow)

6. On Winter you will break out more often due to dry skin

7. On the Winter PLEASE exercise more cuzz of frozen oil and to wet out the poison in your blood.

8. Do not use soap or any medication just plain old warm water.

9. Let the warm shower clean your face not your hands.

10. Go out more or something so you wont stress out of thinking of pimple. (fishing, theater, mall, and etc.)

11. Use medication (depends on skin type) i use proactiv just the cream not the green liquid or the soap to clean face. use a very very small amount on the pimple not on the place that is red.

12. Do not try to plug facial hair

13. Cut your nail and clean it PLEASE

14. Long nail will cause scar due to poping

15. Do not eat fast food or spicy food

16. Stay away from milk if you are a teen.

17. DO NOT USE MAKE UP

if you follow this, acne will lessen about 30-40%. ADVICE: do not follow those stupid tips on the internet like lemond liquid on pimple or tomato juice. it will cause more acne

the same exact story of my life,ive been contemplating suicide for a really long time now

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

im sorry to hear all this man. I know acne is tough and the people at your school don't sound like a bunch of monsters! pm me if you need to talk.

good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The people youre talking about sound horrific. That girl was shallow and idiotic. A girl once asked this guy why he liked me more, when my legs were bigger than hers (LOL) so i threw my drink over her and started a fight. Im not recommending that but you sound like you dont stick up for yourself at all. You're strong but you need some release from these feelings. And you don't need to base what you think about yourself on how others percieve your aesthetics. Work on your self esteem from the inside and youll be on the right road. You dont' need a girl but yeah it might be nice. Search for yourself before anyone else. Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'll mirror what Polka said, that's an incredibly raw and emotive post you've written. It's brought back alot of painful memorys of what I went through just reading through it. I've been called stuff like ugly to, at times by complete strangers lol :wacko: And I'll admit, at times it breaks you. Nowadays, through diet mostly, my acne has subsided alot, although I now have roscea to contend with lol. The main problem though will always be the mental scars and the anxiety that I have developed.

The worse of it now is over for you though; and something in ya must have been incredibly tough to go through what you gone through. You can be proud of that I'm sure. You realise that doing nothing wil not gain you results, and that is a great mindset to have. Use the pain that you've gone through as motivation for improvement - weight lift, eat a healthy diet, gain knowledge; anything you want to do.

Most people wait till they get a heart attack or whatever to make long lasting beneficial changes to their lives, you at least will already have that major event that will spur you on to greater things.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
i wanna tell a story of my life and wishing it could change a person life. and to hope some people to stop doing stupid things. i read some forum in here and its depressing and i understand it all.

well it started in 6th grade when i grew some pimple on the nose and the kid tease me calling me "red nose the rain deer." thats when i felt insecure.

Then 7th grade started i didnt grow any acne except some red mark on the nose. I dont know why girl wanna talk to me and ask me out.i really felt insecure and i dont think im worthy to be with them.

8th grade i break out so much. student ask me why i have so much acne? i was so embarrass i didnt say anything. when i break out so much i went to a family doctor. hes like "damn, you have sooo much acne" then he gave me some cream medication. well in 8th grade so many people make fun of me even the kids look at me funny. even my friend called me ugly and crap. in my mind i talk to myself (i know im ugly. you think i dont know. why do people have to say it? Does it make them feel better?). I kept saying to myself life is long and i hope to find a better days.

well 9th grade started i grew acne on my check and i wear hood so i dont want people to stare at me. I HATE PEOPLE THAT STARE AT ME. 9th grade, im sooo quiet in class and i dont wanna talk to anyone. well in P.E. some kid accidently touch my face and hes like "ewwww, i touch his face" so then he ran after the girls and try to touch them with the hand he touch my face. the girl was shouting "ahhhhhh, dont touch me ewwww" so yea i kept telling myself i'll find a better days.

10th grade started, i went to the doctor so much to change medication my mother is embarrass to go with me. she said to me "why dont you be the doctor son?i should give you to him since he want a son." it hurt me so much til now. i remember every words buh i dont blame her she raise me. the only person i should blame is myself not being the son she wanted. well i like this one girl since 7th to 10th grade and i wanted to ask her out buh i dont seem to have the courage. i dont want to regret in the future not asking her out and not knowing the answer. i give my self a chance and yea i ask her out buh she didnt said anything she change the subject. i know she dont wanna hurt me and i adore her even though she rejected me. she didnt laugh at me and my friend thinks she pretty too. for serious im a picky person. well i took accutane and it suck. i stop the medication cuzz i could felt some pressure in my head and it hurts. i went to the doctor to check if i should continue. well he said to me "i rather die as being pretty". accutane have so many side effect. after drinking it i think i have a mental problem. Oh yea one time i was in the waiting room some woman say "damn you have so many acne" my mom was there. she just turn her head trying to ignore. my father make fun of my in some resturarant "theres your friend" he said that to me cuzz some acne kid walk in. 10th grade is the worst year. all day i do is sleep in bed cuzz i wanna dream of the person i like (no lies) i lost like 20 pounds. everyday of my life is like a repeat school, home,sleep, eat, and sleep. i didnt do homework. in the spring my friend called me to hangout and i appreciated; they help me get through it. so yea i gave myself chance i give the girl i like some clue i know she knows it after some several talk she ignore me. i understand. oh yea i wore make up to cover my scar (yea im a boy) but i stop. and no im not gay. Some mexican kid siad "you wear make up?" i was like "yea?" hes said "NICE" LMAO anyway also i cut myself cuzz i hate my self soo much. As time pass by, the pain goes away buh when i look in the mirror i ask god why im so ugly? i didnt do anything sinful.

so in the summer i met some girl and i like her she held my hand and all. my friend said she likes me. she was average looking. yea im human i judge. i know who is beautiful or not. I ask her out "will you be my girlfriend" yea kinda childish. im so embarass cuzz all my friend was there. she dont want me to get embarass. she didnt answer. i was kinda depress. i know no girl want me. soo all of us went to a park and hangout. she was there too. i got drunk cuzz i dont wanna feel the pain buh when you drink it felt warm. yea after my friend drove me home. i chatted with her she said "you are ugly and i was just having fun. dont mistake of me liking you. i will never like you"

the pain of each year is getting worse. sometime i cried at night buh its alright everyone cries. i dont wanna bottle it up inside.

11th grade i dont care about anything in life and what people think of me. i made sooo much enemy in high school through senior buh yea i didnt grew much acne as i did. got into soo much fight cuzz i hate this world. I HATE EVERYONE. THEY MADE ME WHO I AM. let them hate me. i learn that i rather save an animal lives rather than a human lives. human judge, kill, betray, and hurt other people. while animal just want to survive. human do more evil deeds than helping out others. i am and still is isolated from the world. the media expect a standard beauty and life style and everyone is being brain wash by propaganda.

12th grade passed, i miss out so much cuzz of acne. winter formal, prom and graduation. im still living cuzz i wanna continue this journey cuzz everything happen for a reason. im wanna live cuzz i dont want to loose to anyone due to they judgement of me. i have pride in life cuzz i dont wanna choose some random girl that i dont like or love and get marry or be in a relationship with. Im still here to search for the person i love. i rather love someone than they love me cuzz i feel so uncomtfortable when someone treat me nice. in reality, both person dont love each. one of the person love and the other dont. i been through soo much.and seen many things and its depressing. sometime i make fun of myself to my friend saying "you wanna hangout with me cuzz i make you look good huh?" they laugh and we all laugh i dont care much of other. im loosing friend every year now i have no one. i just go fishing at the pier til night. keeps me sane. they have girlfriend and all. Im not worry if i die alone cuzz life goes by fast. now i grow pimple once in awhile. a few scar buh i consider myself alright buh still hidious. But sometime i dont know why i am here. it doesnt matter if i live cuzz everyone die sooner or later. and i ask myself "if you die early the less pain and stress you have to go through." buh just continue with life see wuh happen. NOTE* Do not have kid if both of you have acne cuzz the kid gonna be depress you just hurting them.

so many comment of me being ugly its like countless

little help of getting rid of acne:

1. Do not touch your face; if you must pop it clean your hands and use a clean clothes to wrap around finger to pop. After poping, use a some tolet paper to clean blood and PLEASE SHOWER AFTERWARD.

2. shower after exercise

3. shower 2- 3 times a day (morning, noon, before sleep)

4. Do not cover your face with your blanket.

5. Use a t-shirt to cover your pillow every 2 day (flip the side of the pillow)

6. On Winter you will break out more often due to dry skin

7. On the Winter PLEASE exercise more cuzz of frozen oil and to wet out the poison in your blood.

8. Do not use soap or any medication just plain old warm water.

9. Let the warm shower clean your face not your hands.

10. Go out more or something so you wont stress out of thinking of pimple. (fishing, theater, mall, and etc.)

11. Use medication (depends on skin type) i use proactiv just the cream not the green liquid or the soap to clean face. use a very very small amount on the pimple not on the place that is red.

12. Do not try to plug facial hair

13. Cut your nail and clean it PLEASE

14. Long nail will cause scar due to poping

15. Do not eat fast food or spicy food

16. Stay away from milk if you are a teen.

17. DO NOT USE MAKE UP

if you follow this, acne will lessen about 30-40%. ADVICE: do not follow those stupid tips on the internet like lemond liquid on pimple or tomato juice. it will cause more acne

Are you suicidal?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Man, I feel your pain, really , but you know what? I have moderately severe acne (so pretty bad) and I've been model scouted twice! Life is too short to linger on the quality of your skin, so linger on quality of life!

About your look, when I got acne I got really scared and thought , 'hey if i compensate for my skin with my clothes, maybe I'll look better' so I wore indie clothes, got a few piercings and grew my hair, and you know what? It worked! I felt better about myself, I genereally look a bit more attractive than before !

Also, and I know everyone will disagree, I started experimenting. Much like religion, drugs can help you through shit. I smoked alot of dope (i've stopped), and I don't regret one of those joints, I tell you.... it helped me escape, it got me new friends, I forgot about my acne!

In short, grab life by the balls and people instantly react!

Good luck man, I wish you all the best x

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes


×