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Soo basically,

I'm 19 years old. Have had mild-moderate (sometimes fairly severe) acne for about 4 years. I know that doesn't sound like a long time but it definetely feels longer than it's been.

I'm currently on my 5th month of Accutane: I take 40 mgs one day and 80 mgs the next day alternating. It HAS worked wonders I'm not going to lie but it's still not perfect. My dermatologist said the sixth month is going to be my last month on it but I'm so worried that it's going to come back full force once I'm done my course. I wish I could just stay on Accutane forever... at least it keeps things at bay lol...

But anyways, the reason I'm writing this is because I feel like with this skin problem I'm never going to be able to pursue everything that I want in life. I'm an actress and I desperately want to make it big but because of acne I've lost almost all of the self confidence I had within me. It was so bad this summer that I literally stayed inside my house for 2 months. Didn't even leave unless I absolutely had to. It was probably the lowest point in my life. I don't understand why this is happening to me and some days I feel like it's going to get better and I'll be able to conquer any challenges but then there's days (like today) where I feel like it's never going to get better and I start to think well what's the point?

And on top of everything, I feel like no one's ever going to be able to love me when I have a face like mine. I don't want to be alone but if I can't even bare to look at myself in the mirror, then who's going to even want to kiss me?! I mean, if I do start dating someone, he'll probably be so embarassed to bring me out in public that he'll just hide me away and only bring me out when my skin looks nice. I'll be like the girl in the iron mask lol...

I honestly just wish Harry Potter was real so he could come cast some spells on my face and make me feel beautiful.

Sometimes I wish I lived in a world full of blind people... can you imagine? That would be sweet.

Anyways, that's all I had to say... just really needed to get my feelings out to people who would actually understand what I'm going through.

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we need some basis for comparison here

a lot of people it seems like have very skewed perceptions of what severe acne is...

you say that accutane has "done wonders for you" though not perfect (not a standard you want to hold yourself up to anyway...)

but then later youre talking about how bad your acne is

can you give us some sort of indication about what your acne was like before going on accutane & what its like now?

hearing outsiders opinions can often put things back in to perspective, especially if its something you struggle w/ internally

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Yes, acne is quite the emotional burden, and it becomes much worse when the individual stricken sheds any sort of insecurity about it. Your best bet, although easier said than done of course, would be to continue living as much of a charasmatic and outgoing life as you possibly could. People really are drawn to those with confidence despite the unfortunate affliction that is acne (and other skin diseases as well). I remember seeing a pretty girl at an outlet mall sometime ago who---and it was very much apparent---was incredibly depressed. She must have had psoriasis or something similar, and would constantly check her reflection in the stores' windows as she jaunted passed them with her friends. Everytime she peered at herself, her face would instantly whip away and would form a gesture of pure disgust followed by the drooping of the head and---what appeared to me---sobbing. I felt her pain for there's no doubt that I myself have felt what she had felt, but I couldn't help being turned off by her sad and meek impressions. It wasn't attractive in the least and took much away from the physical allurement I had initially seen from her.

My eyes followed her for a while and she eventually turned a corner out of sight. It's sad really for she was a very pretty girl no doubt, but---I state again---it was the insecurity and lack of charisma that literally stripped a whole deal from her appearance. I cannot emphasis this enough.

Please oh please, do try to be as confident as you can.

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Wow, reading that post was like reading something I had written myself. I feel the EXACT same way. I'm 23, which is meant to be the prime of most girls' lives. Instead I feel completely hopeless. I've had bad acne for the past two years, went on Accutane which made it bearable, but absolutely did not clear me. Now, about a month ago I was also diagnosed with psoriasis. It's started creeping onto my face now, and whenever I use any product on it, it just gives me acne. I know that both conditions are only going to spread and get worse.

I honestly feel like this is the end of any hope of a happy life. I avoid going outside because I can't bear to have people look at me. I stopped even trying to date or find a guy, because I know that no one would ever want to be with someone with a face like mine. I feel like this is it for me. My skin problems never go away, ever. If it's not one thing, it's another. I can't be happy like this. The reply post about seeing the depressed girl in the mall- it's a nice thought that we could all just be positive, but that's pretty damn hard when I can't even look in the mirror without crying.

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I understand floggers. But you cannot allow acne to make you feel unwanted. There is something you can offer to the world. There is one thing that can make your life worthwhile, you just can't see it yet. A good reputation far exceeds your physical appearance. Sharing love to others is what can bring you back to that human state. Giving is always better than receiving. I'm confident that others will show you the same respect. You will always have days where acne beats you down. But don't let those days turn into weeks and months. Everyone, despite what they look like, deserves a chance at life.

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I don't understand why this is happening to me and some days I feel like it's going to get better and I'll be able to conquer any challenges but then there's days (like today) where I feel like it's never going to get better and I start to think well what's the point?

And on top of everything, I feel like no one's ever going to be able to love me when I have a face like mine. I don't want to be alone but if I can't even bare to look at myself in the mirror, then who's going to even want to kiss me?! I mean, if I do start dating someone, he'll probably be so embarassed to bring me out in public that he'll just hide me away and only bring me out when my skin looks nice. I'll be like the girl in the iron mask lol...

Try not to devote any energy to wondering why this is happening to you. Ridding myself of that thought was key towards making something bearable in life. Know that awful things happen to people, there is no partiality, no discrimination. Nearby, a 17-year old girl died in a car accident, days after getting her license. You think you got it bad, until other people's reality smacks you upside the head.

Of course, your pain is also your own, and just as real and vivid. To that end, know that worth isn't defined by the condition of your skin.

BTW, I felt that way too about love. To a fair degree, I was proved wrong. But it will take self-love to make love seem real and deserving. You may not have all dreams come true, but the ones that do, still make for a worthwhile life, right?

SOS

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