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Iliad

The thing about Introverts and Extroverts

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This is an enlightening and entertaining article about social types.

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200303/rauch The ending made me laugh. :lol:

Are you more of an introvert or extrovert?

How has your acne effected your answer to the above?

Which of the two people types has it harder with acne?

As for me, you might have guessed that I am more of an introvert. Acne just pushed me further inside myself, which I now understand has been unhealthy for me. As for the third question, I don't really know, tha's why I'm askin' you!

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im an introvert. i find it hard to small talk with people i dont personally know (no common ground so nothing to speak about) and obviously find it hard approaching girls. thats why i drink before social situations, i dont get drunk i just go borderline so my inhibitions are lowered and i find it easier to converse with people.

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I'm an introvert. I've always been very shy and quiet and find alot of people hard to relate to. My Acne has just given me one more reason to retreat into myself I suppose, but I know I won't have a total character change and become the life and soul of the party when my skin clears cos I've never been that way!

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I'm definitely an introvert, I need to be alone for a certain amount of time per day, and sometimes even when I'm having fun with friends I'd just want to go somewhere alone to think about stuff. I don't think that my friends really understand me when I do that :) (They've called me a hermit sometimes haha). Actually I've always had a dream of going to Mongolia for a few months alone.

I'm pretty sure I would be like this even without acne, but acne has surely made me more shy and self concious. And ofcourse there were times when I didn't go out with my friends because of my acne.

I think that introverts have it harder when it comes to acne, I know plenty of very social people with acne and ofcourse people don't even care that they do have it, but for me it's impossible to be myself if I'm in a group and have bad acne. Which is why I went on accutane ofcourse, couldn't take it no longer.

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I'm an extrovert - and I would think introverts would have a harder time with socializing with acne. My husband is an introvert and he has a hard time making small talk as it is, let alone with acne.

And the article is right - I don't quite understand introverts. I've lived with enough of them to know how to leave them alone (mostly, sometimes I can't help myself and I wind up pestering them about what's going on in thier head!), but for me, socializing is so much of who I am and how I get my own energy, both mental and emotional, that I find it hard to understand how others would not.

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As the article confirms, being an introvert does not necessarily mean you are socially awkward, are shy, or have a low self-esteem.

It means you are energized mentally & more satisfied by internal things in your own mind (ie. reading alone), as opposed to external things that involve others (ie. hanging out with friends).

Some introverted people avoid being social because they prefer being alone, & then they become shy and develop a low self-esteem because they never took opportunities to develop good social skills. That makes them avoid people more & compounds the problem.

I think it's important to note that there is nothing wrong with being an introvert, but that avoiding social interaction due to shyness or low self-esteem is an anxiety issue and that is a problem.

There are many introverted people who are not shy, have great social skills, and who have a balanced view of themselves. Just as some extroverts can be shy, socially awkward, and have little confidence. Acne is not going to cause introversion, but social anxiety and low self-esteem.

I just want to note the difference because I consider myself an introvert and felt it was a bad thing because American culture highly values "extroverted qualities". I realize now that social anxiety is the bad thing, not introversion, and that can hit anyone.

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I was an introvert even before I got acne, however I think its made it more into a bad thing than a good thing.

Before I was an introvert because I just loved doing things on my own, I would rather be alone than with a bunch of people, and its not because I dont like people its just when your by yourself you can do what you want when you want and not have to worry about someone else wanting to do this, or not wanting to do that... that sort of thing, and also to this day my dad is an intorvert, and I think I kinda got it from him.

Im still that kind of introvert but now when I get invited to go out lots of the time I decline because I just kinda feel differnt, all my friends have nice skin and I don't. At one point I didn't care that I didnt have nice skin and would just go out but then one of my friends forwarded me and email between her and one of my other friends and she said something along the lines "Lets invite her(me) out because she will make us look better" ... ha ha yeah and since that I kinda avoid going out because I just dont want to put myself in those situations.

I love being an introvert, I just wish is was for my reasons alone, not the acne part. ha ha

Hopefully one day I will be clear!

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I'm not convinced it's a black and white line between 'extrovert' and 'introvert' as the article makes out. I would describe myself as introverted, but around people I know I can be extrovert. I really don't fit into either one easily.

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When I'm with my friends, I love having a good time. We're loud and we love to joke around. I love getting energy from *interesting* people and finding out who they are what they're about. I love cultures and new food. I need to be with people to figure out who they are, obviously.

Definitely. I think a lot of introverts feel that way. Of course, few people are 100% any one way. Even if you strongly lean towards introversion it does not mean you don't enjoy people.

I like big cities with lots of people walking around, and loud music at crowded concerts and things that take me out of my shell. When I am with a small group, I can actually dominate conversations.

After all, you need outside inspiration to ponder over when you are alone again and being creative.

I think introverts who are not shy are actually most puzzling to people. The older I get and the less shy I get, the more people find my introverted personality confusing.

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That article describes me perfectly, I love it :P

But I have been learning to become more extrovert, even with acne. While I do like being alone for many hours of the day I need to be around people every so often too.

I thought it was interesting how the article mentioned introverts give good presentations. I took a speech class a few semesters ago and actually enjoyed giving speeches, even though I was super nervous. It gives me a sense of power :D

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Nope....not me. I'm an acne sufferer but definitely a people person, partier, social idiot. Not always though. I do have to have my alone time to recharge. Acne does keep me from leaving the house without makeup, and save for one or two times when I hit a low emotionally, as long as I have a thick covering of makeup I will go out. It makes me feel so much better, and other people don't really care anyway. Having a good time and strengthening social connections helps make everything better, and helps me remember that there are more facets to my life than my skin. It's hard sometime, but for the most part I embrace socializing.

-- Jess

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I was reading the article and i really agree with the words that were written. I mean i can really relate to what he wrote, its like i felt that he described my feeling exactly. I guess its hard being an introvert in a world of extroverts, its like being gay in a world of straight ppl, not many ppl really understand you well unlike extroverted ppl which get understood by others really easily, i think it helps provide them with a lot more emotional stability. I mean humans are social creatures, we live in packs, we arent created to live alone we need emotional support to feel good, we need to feel wanted and loved its normal i guess, its human nature and im sure there are a lot of tough guys out there that would say its pussy talk but even the most mucho person needs love although they wont admit it.

I guess extroverts get a lot more of this love from others and i guess why they like to socalise so much, its cause they are meeting ppl that they are comfortable with all the time, like they share the same interests and needs. I can relate to what the article said about small talk. I dont really like it very much but its like everyone loves it so im the odd one out. Now ill talk to new ppl and most of my friends, like small talk i mean, but i dont feel as fulfilled as if i where to have a proper interesting discussion. Most ppl wont want that cause there too busy socalising with new ppl all the time to spend the time to talk about something more interesting. As an introvert i prefer to have a very close friendship with a single person then talking to many but its hard to get that level of friendship nowadays. I'v got tons of friends, loads, but i dont feel that im really that close with any of them. I think its because there arent that many ppl that share my way of life and hobbies so closely and it sucks being in the minority.

I dunno how many ppl here can relate to what im saying, maybe i didnt really describe myself well cause im high at the moment and i cant really reason too well hehe. I wish i was different cause i could be happier, like more conforming and fit in more but im not. I cant help it, if i dont really enjoy going out and constantly meeting new ppl i cant change that its me but at least id like to find a person who shares my views and would prefer to spend a lot of time with a good friend then a bit with many not so good ones.

Anyway, boring talk over. Id like your opinions on what i said though if you read this post

cheers, take care.

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Iliad! I found this article very very interesting! I'm very glad you shared this with us. I think I am more of an extrovert. I love hanging out with friends and people. Although I've suffered from acne for about 5 years now, it never really stopped me from going out and just having some fun! I mentioned in my very first post that I was very negative and sad at that point in my life, but I usually dealt with that in the privacy of my own home. Only my mother and sister know how much it affected me back then. Of course I'd always be self-conscious about how I looked whenever I was out with friends but I knew they wouldn't be rude enough to say anything mean. After all, they are your friends, right? Anyways, I think it may be a little more difficult for introverts when dealing with acne simply because they are so misunderstood. Despite the difficulties you might have I believe that you'll be able to overcome them! All you gotta do is BELIEVE. :)

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I'm an introvert. I've always been very shy and quiet and find alot of people hard to relate to. My Acne has just given me one more reason to retreat into myself I suppose, but I know I won't have a total character change and become the life and soul of the party when my skin clears cos I've never been that way!

Same.

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Eh, I'm pretty much set in the middle of the scale but more so leaning towards introvert. I don't have trouble making small talk or talking to new people, that is assuming I'm not feeling threatened or intimidated by the people around me.

I do, however, need time to myself, and find that I'm better at "recharging" myself when there are no others around. I am also so sick of my friends and family calling me antisocial because I have absolutely NO problem at all spending a Friday night home alone as opposed to going to a party.

But hey, maybe I just missed the whole point of the article.

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before acne, i always fell somewhere in the middle. i loved social gatherings and hanging out w/friends but always needed some time alone to recharge. There was a good balance of extreme socializing and personal alone downtime. But after 3 years of acne's effects, im starting to realize that my core personality has def changed. im heavily leaning towards introversion. And not just bc of social withdrawl, but moreso in my general reaction to others. I get so annoyed by ppl who talk too much or talk abt mundane practical things. It's like their mouths are on auto-pilot. it drives me crazyyy and i feel like my energy is being drained listening to their pointless jibber jabber. all i can think abt is how to escape! i thought i had turned into a mega bitch or something, but im glad i can blame it on introversion now haha

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This article seems so biased towards introverts and It was confirmed as soon as I read this line:

"If we introverts ran the world, it would no doubt be a calmer, saner, more peaceful sort of place."

I'm an introvert btw

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I have absolutely NO problem at all spending a Friday night home alone as opposed to going to a party.

same for me, i can go through periods of much socializing where ill be out every friday/sat/sun for most of day or i can go the whole weekend doing nothing but lazing around the house playing videogames/reading/general surfing the web. makes no difference to me.

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I like being at home, but I don't much like being home alone. I'd much rather my husband or sister be with me - I get morose if I'm left alone too long!

In that sense, I really envy introverts. They handle alone time very well. I'd like to have that!

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This article seems so biased towards introverts and It was confirmed as soon as I read this line:

"If we introverts ran the world, it would no doubt be a calmer, saner, more peaceful sort of place."

I'm an introvert btw

Yeah, I realized that too, but hey, it's an article about how introverts are misunderstood written by an introvert, so what can you expect? I think the line that made it really obvious for me was

"Are introverts arrogant? Hardly. I suppose this common misconception has to do with our being more intelligent, more reflective, more independent, more level-headed, more refined, and more sensitive than extroverts."

iow, "We're not arrogant, just better!" :lol: I dunno 'bout more refined or intelligent, but it's mostly true that introverts are more reflective, independent and sensitive. At least in my experience. But of course there are exceptions like Elsewhere, who is quite sensitive.

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