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MellowFellow

27 years old never had a girlfriend

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I don't think men have high standards as women do. Atleast not mine. I only ask for;

Above age 25

No kids

Non-Conceited

Non-Materialistic

virgin

That's all I ask for.

I can understand meka's view when it comes to virginity, everyone has the right to have certain prefernces.

On the downside in the western culture most women who are over 25 and virgin...hmm I don't know it's just not the norm, so maybe you have to look into religious types or girls from other cultures to be frank. That's just the way it is.

I am a virgin myself (come from a very conservative background) and as nice it would be to get with someone who is as well, I don't feel like one can let such things get too important. I mean everyone who is a virgin isn't an angel, some just didn't get the chance to rumble imho.

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nothing but loneliness pain,acne scars and more pain. I don't see my life changing 10 years from now.Anybody else in the same boat?I'm thinking of jumping off the boat someday if you know what i mean.Life's not worth living when you have nobody to share it with.just my opinion.

I don't think it's a big problem to not have had a gf going into your 20's .. if you're focused on other things then good for you, but if you're not happy then it's a different story.

I think WE can all find someone no matter how we look, not everyone in the world is so shallow. It's just most of us only focus on our acne, so ironically the people who don't care about it are probably turned off anyway.

I know severe is hard, but you guys being lonely and depressing yourselves all the time is not the way.

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You have to look at this life as your only opportunity to live.

Nothing beyond our physical existence is guaranteed, so don't ever take it for granted.

For me, that thought in itself is scary enough for me just shup up and face my demons.

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Everyone will find someone sooner or later...and if not live life the to the fullest by yourself!! Go sky diving and stuff just to forget everything else as for me I got my first boyfriend at 18!!!...thats pretty old for a girl

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My problem is pretty much the opposite: I've had a few to many g/f's. For teh past year ive gotten my heart smashed literally 4 or 5 times. T.T

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You need to get out and socialize really if you are at home all alone no one is going to come knocking on your door begging you to come out and enjoy the world. You need to get over calling yourself gross too, if you don't love yourself how is anyone else going to love you? Your time will come you just have to be patient and in the mean time go out and enjoy life. They say love comes when you least expect it and I am a huge believer in that as well. There for a while I was feeling down on myself for not having a BF then I just thought, "screw it, I am awesome and if this person does not want to be with me then they can f off!". You cannot just sit and wallow, you are the ruler of your life, if you are feeling down about yourself find exactly what it is that is bringing you down and correct it. I wish you the best of luck in whatever you do but LOVE YOURSELF AND OTHERS WILL THEN LOVE YOU AS WELL!

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I think you should go out more if you want to get a girlfriend me myself I'm 15 years old and had never had a girlfriend I had about 3 chances but I blew all of them because I was a pussy 3 years ago :( but now I'm more mature

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I think you should go out more if you want to get a girlfriend me myself I'm 15 years old and had never had a girlfriend I had about 3 chances but I blew all of them because I was a pussy 3 years ago :( but now I'm more mature

Ha this is pretty much my life's story but i got over it and grew balls eventually xD

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I think you should go out more if you want to get a girlfriend me myself I'm 15 years old and had never had a girlfriend I had about 3 chances but I blew all of them because I was a pussy 3 years ago :( but now I'm more mature

Ha this is pretty much my life's story but i got over it and grew balls eventually xD

Yeah because girls mature faster than guys

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ayo i find if i havin a pretty shitty day i put pen to pad and i write sum poetry about how im feeling. could agree wit u mor arley there was a girl this summer and she like me and i liked her and she actually said to me "take me to a drive in" but yo acne is weird it messes wit the brain. and so i dont take her out and was a puzzy

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before acne i had girls on my arms left and rite

You're exactly like this guy i knew. He went like crazy when no girls liked him and then he went all depressed on me. It was actually kinda funny, becuase he used to be able to be a player but not anymore. Now im the pretty one and he wished he would have treated me betteer.

But in your case i have no clue how you were before, so i cant judge you.

i also thought i was reasonably good looking before acne. fuck that now.

Aww but everyone is beautiful. Some people are lucky enough to have it outside, but if not, then beauty is inside.

And remember, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. In your case, good looks.

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I guess it's all about what you want in life. Some people want to settle down early, others don't. I'm the latter. I'm approaching my mid-twenties and only dated a few girls, but that was back in high school. Since then I've just been too busy with full time school and work to try and go out and meet people. I see all my friends who have committed girlfriends or are married, and I don't want the lives they have at all. To be honest it looks boring. Sure they're having fun but it's not what I want. It gets a lot harder to have the "guys night out" now and when we do it feels like a movie because it's the same day, same place, same time, etc. Some of my married friends seem like they're bored with their wives now and only need them for sex. It's kind of weird. They're all whipped into doing what their wives want and getting permission to go do something, which IMO is lame and I don't want that. For me right now I'm just too independent to need someone hanging onto me right now. So my point is live your life, don't fall into the trap that you need to live a life that mirrors everyone around you. You will be happy and that can only lead to good things :)

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IM also in the same boat as u, im 22 and never actually had a real "bf" I've dated back in high school and early college, when my acne cleared up a bit. WHen my acne came back it was worse than ever and many scars included, so now at 22 all alone again..life sucks..anyways, I feel ur pain, I just wanted to say ur not alone. I rarely leave my house now b/c of this. Some people don't understand its not that easy by saying "just go out and socialize". If it was that easy, don't u think we would have done that already. If your self-conscious u only think people are staring at how bad ur skin is, and many ppl judge u based on appearances, so its hard meeting new ppl. I remember being in the bathroom and one girl referred to me as the "girl with the nasty skin." OK, how can I socialize when that all people know u as...sorry to go on and on..but its Hard

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Post a picture. We all have acne here, and we all have scars. If we can look at ourselves, then you can look at yourself. Who knows, maybe with the combined advice of all of us (rather than working on it alone like you have been) we'll be able to help you look, and more importantly feel, much better.

I'll tell you right now that I'll be your friend. I haven't been through what you have, but reading about how you feel like you've missed out on the things that everyone takes for granted was like reading my own biography. I think you and I have had very similar experiences in high school. When I was a little kid I was actually pretty outgoing, and I had some friends. Then over the summer between middle school and high school my family moved and my skin started breaking out. I didn't know anyone at this new school, and I was honestly to embarrassed to talk to anyone because I felt like a walking game of connect the dots. It only took about two months of eating lunch alone and having family members ask "what happened to my face" or tell me "I needed to take better care of my skin" (when I was killing myself trying product after product after product...) for me to go from confident and happy to alone, insecure, and outright desolate. The acne got worse, and I shied away from people more and more until eventually I realized that I was graduating high school a person who had never laughed with friends, who didn't go to the prom, who didn't have his first date... hell, I never even learned to ride a bike because I had nowhere to go and no one to see. I've always been a great student, high grades on everything, but I failed out of 3 schools before graduating via GED because I got to a point that I just felt too weak to even show up. It was like living in a glass box, watching all these people around me enjoying life and all I could do was watch in isolation. Long and agonizing story short, I understand a little bit about how you feel.

Then, thank god, in College I met a girl. Looking back, she's actually not the first person who tried to talk to me - she is however, the first person that I responded to. I felt like I was a waste of her time, but for some reason I figured I'd let her suffer my presence for a little while. I don't know what's wrong with her, or how someone like her even exists, but she actually found my social ineptness charming. She asked me out, because she knew I didn't have the courage to ask her out, and she took me to the beach. The entire time, I was practically paralyzed with anxiety. I was actually trying to keep the sun behind me so my acne would be in shadow and harder to see like I was worried that maybe she just hadn't noticed it yet or something. She kept taking me places, and I got paranoid that she had some other reason for liking me, that she just felt sorry for me or something, and eventually I snapped and asked her if she loved me - and she said yes. I almost cried, because at that moment I actually felt connected to another human - something I hadn't felt before, ever. I stopped fighting my relationship with her - I stopped fighting myself. As soon as I was able to let her in, I also started letting other people in.

Three years later she and I are still dating. I've had acne the whole time, though I've recently gotten it under control. She, has never had acne. It really didn't matter to her because she knew that I would love her more than any other person in the world - and everyday I make sure she knows how right she is to believe that!

Breaking out of that glass box was as simple as muting my internal dialogue. I thought so damn much to myself that I didn't have room for anyone else! I had to learn to stop criticizing myself long enough to realize that no one else was. I had to learn that all the trauma I went through in high school was over, and that even though I still have acne and I still freeze up in social situations it doesn't matter. My life will be as good as I let it be.

Now I'm obviously not the person that you're going to spend your life with, but maybe I can be the person who'll help you find her, and who'll help you let her love you. In other words, I'll be your friend. If you'll let me.

man you're incredible

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I'm 19, never had a boyfriend.

Mellow: Suicide is the most selfish act a person can commit. If you truly don't think yourself worthy to live than stop living for yourself. Live for others. Do you realize how many lives you could touch? You said that you have the money and material possessions. Well, there are people who lack both to such an extent, they're dying. Seriously. This life is a gift. Don't throw it away. Think of all the lives you could change for the better if you put in the time and effort. And you just might find that in giving others life, you'll get back yours, too.

I don't believe you have to be lonely the rest of your life. That's a choice you're making. There are plenty of women out there who just want someone to love, laugh with, cry with, and experience life with. Looks don't mean anything in the long run. Don't let our image-obsessed society tell you otherwise.

Shotgun: Fricken go for it. You have nothing to lose. If you don't go after your dream girl, you'll never get her. If you go after her and she rejects you, at least you won't lie in bed 10 years from now wishing you would have done something. Or, if you go after her, you might catch her. Hearing the way you talk about her, it's obvious you deeply love her. That kind of love is so precious, something every woman dreams of. She would be an absolute FOOL to reject that kind of love.

Just putting in my two cents. It truly pains me to see other people in a pain so deep themselves, they would cease to live (contemplating suicide and not going after their dreams).

what others? the ones that disgust us? ffs..

well only others i can imagine are other acne sufferers.

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Post a picture. We all have acne here, and we all have scars. If we can look at ourselves, then you can look at yourself. Who knows, maybe with the combined advice of all of us (rather than working on it alone like you have been) we'll be able to help you look, and more importantly feel, much better.

I'll tell you right now that I'll be your friend. I haven't been through what you have, but reading about how you feel like you've missed out on the things that everyone takes for granted was like reading my own biography. I think you and I have had very similar experiences in high school. When I was a little kid I was actually pretty outgoing, and I had some friends. Then over the summer between middle school and high school my family moved and my skin started breaking out. I didn't know anyone at this new school, and I was honestly to embarrassed to talk to anyone because I felt like a walking game of connect the dots. It only took about two months of eating lunch alone and having family members ask "what happened to my face" or tell me "I needed to take better care of my skin" (when I was killing myself trying product after product after product...) for me to go from confident and happy to alone, insecure, and outright desolate. The acne got worse, and I shied away from people more and more until eventually I realized that I was graduating high school a person who had never laughed with friends, who didn't go to the prom, who didn't have his first date... hell, I never even learned to ride a bike because I had nowhere to go and no one to see. I've always been a great student, high grades on everything, but I failed out of 3 schools before graduating via GED because I got to a point that I just felt too weak to even show up. It was like living in a glass box, watching all these people around me enjoying life and all I could do was watch in isolation. Long and agonizing story short, I understand a little bit about how you feel.

Then, thank god, in College I met a girl. Looking back, she's actually not the first person who tried to talk to me - she is however, the first person that I responded to. I felt like I was a waste of her time, but for some reason I figured I'd let her suffer my presence for a little while. I don't know what's wrong with her, or how someone like her even exists, but she actually found my social ineptness charming. She asked me out, because she knew I didn't have the courage to ask her out, and she took me to the beach. The entire time, I was practically paralyzed with anxiety. I was actually trying to keep the sun behind me so my acne would be in shadow and harder to see like I was worried that maybe she just hadn't noticed it yet or something. She kept taking me places, and I got paranoid that she had some other reason for liking me, that she just felt sorry for me or something, and eventually I snapped and asked her if she loved me - and she said yes. I almost cried, because at that moment I actually felt connected to another human - something I hadn't felt before, ever. I stopped fighting my relationship with her - I stopped fighting myself. As soon as I was able to let her in, I also started letting other people in.

Three years later she and I are still dating. I've had acne the whole time, though I've recently gotten it under control. She, has never had acne. It really didn't matter to her because she knew that I would love her more than any other person in the world - and everyday I make sure she knows how right she is to believe that!

Breaking out of that glass box was as simple as muting my internal dialogue. I thought so damn much to myself that I didn't have room for anyone else! I had to learn to stop criticizing myself long enough to realize that no one else was. I had to learn that all the trauma I went through in high school was over, and that even though I still have acne and I still freeze up in social situations it doesn't matter. My life will be as good as I let it be.

Now I'm obviously not the person that you're going to spend your life with, but maybe I can be the person who'll help you find her, and who'll help you let her love you. In other words, I'll be your friend. If you'll let me.

man you're incredible

Agree!

I agree as well! Acne does suck but, doesn't stop true love from knocking your door..I have had acne since 7 years but, I have dated some really nice guys who liked me for me. Although, there were other issues later..Anyways, the point is that acne really can't stop you from meeting someone special :)

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the reason why superficial signs of confidence matters to a women is because it speaks to their reptilian brain, they say women mature faster then men but that only pertains to their sexual organs, as far as logic goes, this is not their strong point, they are intuitive and are more prone to instinct then logic, so even though many men are perfectly fine as providers they will tend to go for the flashy ones that have an image of "i can do it" rather then the proof of whether they can do it or not. So its very important to display confidence then it even is to have it.

Also women seem to be more prone to being submissive followers, they like it, just like men like domination and sports loud harleys and muscle cars, women tend to enjoy being submissive and led, so they look to you as their leader, their knight in shining armor so if they sense any fear in you they will get nervous because if they are looking to you for guidance and you are nervous then they think they are already fucked when an attacker comes by, its the result of years of evolution and i dont care how independant women try to pretend to be these days a few hundred years of civilization isnt going to compete with thousands of years of evolution.

So perhaps if there is a way you can show that you can be just as confident and fun to be around with acne and it doesnt shake you, this can improve your odds of initial attraction. But there is also the issue of women needing to fit in, sometimes it about what their friends would think about their boyfriend with acne, but to offshoot this as women get older the are more looking towards you money making capabilities as a sign of whether they will have a good leader in life, so if the moneys is there she doesnt have to be dependent on what superficial signs of confidence represents, the money is all there is, the product sells itself and you dont need any gimmicks.

Ive seen some dorky dudes with money marry some seriously attractive women, no kidding, although these are just generalitys in the world every women has the ability to be different but this is generally how things will work, or at least how i have seen things work so even my experiance may not accuratly represent the reality but i think its a fairly good picture of the nature of things.

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