Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...
brentkid

Life is a song - My Own Accutane Log

Recommended Posts

Day 34

Just checking in to say hi since there's nothing new to report. Haven't had a breakout all week so far. Maybe one or two tiny whiteheads but that's it.

I can't say enough how great my nose and blackheads look. It's the first time I've seen my nose in forever where it's not littered with blackheads all over. It's just smooth skin! I'm really loving that.

The aloe gel is nice too at night. It's cool and feels great after a warm shower. It also seems to keep the irritated blotchiness at bay that otherwise shows up all over my face.

I do have one big ass zit in my hairline on my right temple. You can't even see it but it's sore. Other than that, no visible stuff is showing up so I'm happy.

In other news, my ex is coming home for the weekend and asked if I would be around. Of course I said yes so I'm seeing her Saturday I guess. She said she'd call so I didn't even bother working out solid plans. It's weird with her because I can't quite make out if she's want I really want or just want I think I need anymore. I think she's in the same boat and has no idea what she's doing, considering her parents don't even know about her new boyfriend. The whole thing is just strange. I just want to feel normal for once again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just checking in to see how its going it looks like your doing much better which is great im so glad your nose and blackheads are cleared up! its such a great feeling and really wierd to see smooth clear skin isnt it!!?

Anyway i hope it keeps getting better for you ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 38

Hey everyone, how's it going?

Been lazy with updates lately. So much has been going on that I've just been unmotivated to do more than I actually have to. I plan on quitting my job in maybe two to three weeks but it's been stressing me out like crazy. I'm finding it so hard to balance my time between school and my job. I also dropped my calculus class that was destroying my life. Luckily my adviser was all for dropping a class I knew was stressing me out more than I should be.

In terms of my face, it's more of the same. A zit here and there but no major breakouts. Got a new shampoo that keeps my hair really moisturized, unlike my other one that was leaving my hair feeling weird as hell. My lips and eyes are what bother me the most. Wearing contacts is so uncomfortable and my lips just love getting chapped.

I'd have to say my red marks are beginning to heal more slowly on my face but I can't complain about that too much considering they're much more tolerable than before. I just need to get through this week and the following and I'll have a nice break away from school and work for about eleven days.

I'm at school right now so I can't post pictures, but I'll upload some from yesterday when I get home.

I hope everyone else has a good start to the rest of the week!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 40

Not too much going on with my face lately. A couple actives but honestly, the rest of my face looks so good, I don't even notice them. One thing I do have to say is that recently my eyes get brutally dry when I have my contacts in and the air is dry itself. The same goes for my lips. It's funny because my actual face never gets that dry or cracked.

My ex and I have been talking a lot recently because she's having trouble with her friends at school; trouble that her new boyfriend got her into. He's doing a pretty bad job of being there for her when he's the boyfriend now and I'm not. It's like I'm doing his job for him. She deserves better than that, even if it isn't me. The whole situation is confusing me because it's exactly how we were in our relationship. We would confide in each other about anything and were always there to support one another. I mean she was crying on the phone to me Sunday. It breaks my heart because at the same time, I know we're not together. I swear at the end of that call I almost said "I love you." Don't want to know what would have happened if I didn't stop myself.

Either way I'm just trying to be there for her because I know how painful it is to be on your own. I just wish everything was normal again...

In other news I got a 94 on my American government and politics class so that's putting me in high spirits for now after getting a D on my first history exam. Least to say, that taught me a lesson about cramming three chapters of a textbook the night before a test.

Anyway I hope everyone is having a good week. Almost the weekend!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Great progress on your acne, I hope I have the same results as you...you are looking a lot better. Good luck man, and thanks for posting on my blog.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 44

No updates in a while, I know. Work and school have been dominating my life lately. I unfortunately don't have pictures either. I'll try to get them up soon but tomorrow is going to be a long day so I don't think it'll be possible until Tuesday.

In terms of my face, I broke out earlier this week. I assume it's a reaction to the increase in my dose. Maybe two small actives on my face now. Everything else is just redness and fading pretty well. My lips are painfully dry, even with auquaphor so I'm normally always putting some on. Other than that, not much to mention.

The rest of this update is going to be a rant and holy shit is it going to be an angry one.

So I've mentioned my ex before. Specifically how I've been there for her recently with all her drama between friends. I honestly didn't mind since we're "friends" now, however unusual it seems, and I still obviously care about her. I didn't talk to her this weekend at all until she texted my phone asking me to come online maybe an hour ago for some help. I figured it was for a paper and I was right.

You see, I've helped her with writing papers since we got together sophomore year of high school. I've always been a good writer in school. It's just what I'm good at. I never asked for anything in return, nor did I expect anything. I just did it because I like helping people out however I can. What's pathetic is that I still helped her this year even when things weren't so great. I mean, we're not even together anymore and already this semester I've rushed home after classes twice to help her meet deadlines. I mean, I wrote an entire fucking paper for her last semester because she was so overloaded with finals.

So like I said, she asked me for help tonight with an intro. I tried my best to encompass what she wanted to say but she kept telling me I wasn't getting it. Being a perfectionist about writing, I kept trying to figure it out. I wasn't getting anywhere. It was obvious she was stressing herself out as well. I tried to help her relax and focus but she accused me of just lecturing her. I then try to just help direct her in how she should go about starting the intro and what to say. She just signs off. Doesn't say a way. Just signs off.

I text her saying "I guess you don't want my help." No response.

Now that makes me fucking angry. I literally did nothing wrong. Nothing. I offered to try and help and she just leaves. If it were just this once, maybe I wouldn't care so much but after all the times I've helped her out and NEVER asked for any favors in return, it really pisses me off.

I've honestly never felt so disrespected by someone I thought I cared about in my life. To not even have the decency to say something. That's all she needed to do. Just say, "Nevermind I think I'll just go and do this on my own." Not just leave without saying anything.

I'm just incredibly upset and don't even know how to handle this. We're just "friends". Do I just avoid her for a few days and then bring it up or is it not even worth my time?

Honestly, I just wish I could have just gotten stuck in time while we were still together. My life just feels like it's progressively falling apart.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's pretty harsh what she did...

I remember getting angry over the same thing, but it turns out the person had just lost internet connection..woops.

You seem like a really nice guy, and some girls like to take advantage of that. If it were me I would wait until she texted me back, and then ask for an apology. She has to know what she did hurt you.

Anyways, good luck with acne and life, I'll bet you are almost 100% clear by now!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey dude.

Honestly. She is wasting your time, don't help her with her papers anymore... don't listen to her problems anymore. Hell, you could even go as far as not talk to her anymore.

What she did is fucking obnoxious and is shows that she doesn't give a damn about you. Basically the relationship is parasitic. She benefits from it at your expense.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Day 44

No updates in a while, I know. Work and school have been dominating my life lately. I unfortunately don't have pictures either. I'll try to get them up soon but tomorrow is going to be a long day so I don't think it'll be possible until Tuesday.

In terms of my face, I broke out earlier this week. I assume it's a reaction to the increase in my dose. Maybe two small actives on my face now. Everything else is just redness and fading pretty well. My lips are painfully dry, even with auquaphor so I'm normally always putting some on. Other than that, not much to mention.

The rest of this update is going to be a rant and holy shit is it going to be an angry one.

So I've mentioned my ex before. Specifically how I've been there for her recently with all her drama between friends. I honestly didn't mind since we're "friends" now, however unusual it seems, and I still obviously care about her. I didn't talk to her this weekend at all until she texted my phone asking me to come online maybe an hour ago for some help. I figured it was for a paper and I was right.

You see, I've helped her with writing papers since we got together sophomore year of high school. I've always been a good writer in school. It's just what I'm good at. I never asked for anything in return, nor did I expect anything. I just did it because I like helping people out however I can. What's pathetic is that I still helped her this year even when things weren't so great. I mean, we're not even together anymore and already this semester I've rushed home after classes twice to help her meet deadlines. I mean, I wrote an entire fucking paper for her last semester because she was so overloaded with finals.

So like I said, she asked me for help tonight with an intro. I tried my best to encompass what she wanted to say but she kept telling me I wasn't getting it. Being a perfectionist about writing, I kept trying to figure it out. I wasn't getting anywhere. It was obvious she was stressing herself out as well. I tried to help her relax and focus but she accused me of just lecturing her. I then try to just help direct her in how she should go about starting the intro and what to say. She just signs off. Doesn't say a way. Just signs off.

I text her saying "I guess you don't want my help." No response.

Now that makes me fucking angry. I literally did nothing wrong. Nothing. I offered to try and help and she just leaves. If it were just this once, maybe I wouldn't care so much but after all the times I've helped her out and NEVER asked for any favors in return, it really pisses me off.

I've honestly never felt so disrespected by someone I thought I cared about in my life. To not even have the decency to say something. That's all she needed to do. Just say, "Nevermind I think I'll just go and do this on my own." Not just leave without saying anything.

I'm just incredibly upset and don't even know how to handle this. We're just "friends". Do I just avoid her for a few days and then bring it up or is it not even worth my time?

Honestly, I just wish I could have just gotten stuck in time while we were still together. My life just feels like it's progressively falling apart.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 45

Thanks for all the support, guys. I really do appreciate it. She did apologize a little later on that night without me saying anything to her first because I was so pissed. So I guess that's resolved. She has her spring break next week like me so I think I'm going to just end this once and for all. I still have to think about it but I'm pretty sure I'm just going to blunt and say something like, "Listen you said it yourself that you see no future with this kid so am I wasting my time or do you think we'll get back together." I just don't want to deal with this anymore. I have to be more assertive rather than let her so whatever she wants.

I'm really sorry I still don't have pictures but I promise I will tomorrow. Today is just going to be such a long day. I have to drive up to school from about 11-3:45 then rush to work and stay there until 8. I'm pretty sure I'm quitting my job actually. I can't stand the amount of hours I get when I have so much school work to do. It's running me down.

Face is looking alright. If it weren't for about three spots on my left cheek, my left side would look amazing. My right side still has some healing to do after the breakout from early last week. Either way I'd say I have mild acne compared to the pretty high, moderate acne I had when I started. So like I said, pictures tomorrow.

I just have to make it through this week and then I'm free for nine days from school! Can't wait to have my break, it'll be really great.

Anyway, I hope everyone has a good start to the week.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hi friend!

ok so i read your little blip about that chick and you're right that what she did to you was inconsiderate. but cut her some slack. she was probably suUPER stressed out and just wanted a quick fix, which obviously wasnt happening. she might have jsut gotten really frustrated with herself for not knowing how to sort out her own thoughts, and since she alwyas leans of you for these things, was transcending that frustration on to you. i bet she was just too pissed off to say bye, and too jumbled in her head to say something back to your text.

if you care this much for her, im sure she cares just as much about you. give her some time to finish her paper, chill out and maybe even let her feel guilty about what she did. hopefully she will apologize for being a bitch, and if she doesnt, call her out. seriously, tell her calmly that you didnt appreciate how treated you and you were only trying to help.

everyone goes through an emotional crisis once and a while. and you guys are friends, right? she needs you. believe or not, she does love you and appreciates your friendship, even if she doesnt show it all the time.

ps. if you cant tell, im a chick too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

your acne wasn't even bad to begin with. your face will look good in no time. i on the other hand have like 10 times the redmarks you have all around my face so ill have to wait forever and a day to see anything. good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 46

Thanks again to everyone for lending their support.

I took pictures first thing this morning, so here they are.

http://img156.imageshack.us/img156/7853/p1000100fd8.jpg

http://img156.imageshack.us/img156/3528/p1000101df4.jpg

So yeah, you can see where the breakouts were from last week. They're all healing or subsiding now so I'm not really concerned with them. I expected to have a breakout after having my dose upped to 60mg. My nose is still blackhead free which is awesome.

You can see some of the dryness on my face but I just woke up so there was nothing really on my face.

Ehh, not a big day for updates since not much is new. Just four more days until my break - can't wait!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 47

Thanks, Bob. Appreciate it.

I forgot to mention last time that I'm halfway through my second month. I've finished three packs 10 30mg pills, plus about two days, so that puts me at seventeen days in. I've been feeling a little sick lately but I'm getting better so I'm hoping I dodged whatever was hitting me the past few days.

In terms of my skin, it's not too bad. Three actives in total. One came to a head but it's pretty small and dry so I'm hoping that disappears. I'm trying to be good about popping stuff since I started Accutane so let's hope I can contain myself. Not too bummed out about the breakout from last week. I figure a week from now I should be looking pretty good.

Oh well, halfway through the week. Three more classes in total and then I'm free for break!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your face is looking great! You're responding really well to the tane.

I'll pm you my chest and "core" routines tomorrow. I've got a really crappy essay due tomorrow that I kind of procrastinated on so I'm going to have to probably pull an all nighter.

Oh, by the way. I find "core" is a word that is horribly misused in the fitness scene. By core are you talking specifically about abs? About the whole trunk? Or about the abs, hip flexions, obliques and errector spinae?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

your skin has improved so much! congratulations :)

i know this is from a post like a month and a half ago, but i love that copeland song you quoted ('you love to sing').

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Your face is looking great! You're responding really well to the tane.

I'll pm you my chest and "core" routines tomorrow. I've got a really crappy essay due tomorrow that I kind of procrastinated on so I'm going to have to probably pull an all nighter.

Oh, by the way. I find "core" is a word that is horribly misused in the fitness scene. By core are you talking specifically about abs? About the whole trunk? Or about the abs, hip flexions, obliques and errector spinae?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 51

So I've hit the fifties. Can't say I'm entirely happy with how my face looks right now but that's primarily my fault. I'm such an idiot. I got a little carried away with masks the past two days and essentially removed a layer of skin off of all of my red marks, leaving extremely irritated and fresh skin exposed. It's an unfortunate setback but I'm hoping a week from now I'll be looking a lot better. Luckily this upcoming week is my break anyway so I can get a lot of rest and as self-defeating as it is, not go into the public with my face looking so bad.

It's only my right side actually. My left side looks amazing minus one or two small marks.

Here's to hoping for the best in the coming weeks.

Also got some new pictures up so everyone can take a gander at how bad my right side looks.

http://img517.imageshack.us/img517/3284/p1000104ch8.jpg

http://img119.imageshack.us/img119/4808/p1000105rn7.jpg

I'm not using a single mask for the remainder of my time on Accutane. Honestly, what was I thinking?

This next picture is a call out for Sid, haha. He's not getting away with being the only one on these boards who lifts. Definitely not as lean as I'd like to be but I've been working on my diet the past few weeks. We'll see how it treats me.

http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/5528/p1000107kc4.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bah, yeah. The masks were a bad idea.

Your also looking pretty good, drop a body fat percentage or two and those abs will come out nicely.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hah, yeah I hear ya brother. No more masks. It's just a terrible idea and now I'm paying for it. Lesson learned I suppose.

And yeah, I've finally made appropriate changes to my diet the past two weeks so it's just a matter of keeping it consistent.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 52

So my right side is looking better. For some odd reason, this dead layer of skin had formed over all of my red spots. It was a darker tone which is probably why the marks looks so awful. Luckily it's basically peeled off so I'm back to looking a little better. Still not happy with how it looks but its definitely better than before.

I had a nice first day off for my break. Did absolutely nothing but play Super Smash Bros. Brawl and some Army of Two on my 360. Successful day in my book.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey man, I'm browsing around my music library for a couple of new songs to learn. Any ideas on songs that aren't too difficult to play and sing?

Basically, I can play difficult songs and I can sing difficult songs but I sometimes have a hard time if both are really hard.

Edit: Hahah, don't give me something too easy either. I just learned "The Kill" by 30 Seconds to Mars (I don't really like em... but meh) and mastered in in like 2 minutes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes

×