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brentkid

Life is a song - My Own Accutane Log

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Life is a song, but you're scared to sing along...

So I've finally taken the step forward in beginning a regimen on Accutane. I guess I'll provide a little background about myself beforehand...

I'm 18 years old and have been suffering from pretty mild to moderate acne since I was about 15. I had clear skin up until I became a Sophomore in high school. There were flare ups occasionally while I was a freshman but looking back, it was nothing compared to what I have experienced in the past year or so. So anyway, I'd say around the beginning of winter when I was a Sophomore, I began to get breakouts. It was pretty subtle. However, as time went on it became more sever, leaving unsightly red marks. I would go to the derm, take a prescription medication with some topicals and it would be under control again. The summer would come and I'd have perfect skin again.

Junior year was more of the same - breaking out in the winter and relying on the sun to rid me of my acne. Senior year actually turned out alright. I ran track all through high school so spring track always seemed to help me clear up. However, I noticed that by the end of May and beginning of June, my acne was coming back and leaving red marks once again. I remember on graduation having two ugly looking zits that stuck out so horribly. Little did I know how I would have wished for that again.

The summer before college offered the same relief as every other had. Yet something strikingly odd was occurring. It normally took me until about November to start consistently breaking out but it was only September and it was returning. I'll admit the stress of saying goodbye to all my friends along with a girlfriend for almost three years was hard but that is what college entails. My acne progressed and I grew even more unhappy. That was until one event in my life flipped everything upside down.

My relationship with my girlfriend ended in October. I was heartbroken. She made me feel good about myself no matter what. To her, it was like I never had acne to begin with. The stress of coping with that was incredibly hard and within the following weeks, my face became horrible. I was embarrassed to go into public. I would skip classes on certain days because I would see myself in the mirror and just beat myself up completely about how bad my skin looked. It felt like my whole world was crumbling.

Fast forward to last week. My dermatologist had tried putting me on Bactrim, which was the strongest medication he had ever given me. I met with him last Monday to see how I was doing. I could tell he was not happy with my progress. He had always avoided Accutane when discussing options with me but was now suggesting it. He believed that it's not terribly bad but incredibly persistent. He left the decision to me. As you can probably tell, I opted for Accutane.

So here I am doing this for myself. I don't consider myself vain just simply at my wit's end. Thousands, even millions of people suffer from acne just like me. Some worse then me surely, but to match our numbers are millions out there with clear skin. This is my effort to simply fit into that clear-skin statistic. I never let acne define me. I never let it hurt my personality or keep me from being myself but secretly, I allowed it to hurt me emotionally. I made me ask pointless questions like, "Why me?". Since then I've grown stronger. In a lot of ways I appreciate all that's happened to me in the past few months. If anything it's made me an incredibly stronger and determined person.

Here I am on Day 3:

http://img210.imageshack.us/img210/5648/p1000071zz4.jpg

http://img401.imageshack.us/img401/1337/p1000072du9.jpg

So let this story begin.

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Days 1-3

Nothing too significant. Haven't had a new breakout. Red marks have been doing alright since I started using this overnight cream my mom bought. I have one bump on my left check that's tender but I'm doing what I can to treat it. It won't ever come to a head. It's sort of sad but I know how my acne works now, haha. It'll sit there for a few days being sore and red and slowly disappear by the end of the week. My stomach has been having a few weird pains today but that's the only thing I can even remotely say is a side effect. Dryness is just barely starting to set in.

My acne wasn't horrible to begin with since I had just ended a 30-day prescription of Bactrim so I'm led to believe that I won't have much of an IB. If I do, I've already accepted the fact that Accutane is a product that's used for the long run. My skin can look terrible for a week or two if it means my skin clears up.

I'm pretty stress-free as of now. Spring semester starts up a week from today and I'm beginning to record some music for a little project I felt like starting up.

We'll see how things go!

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Day 4

So I'm beginning to see some more prominent drying. Nothing spectacular but definitely noticeable. I'm getting little dry skin rings around zits that are dried up already, if anyone knows what I'm talking about.

Seems like this lump on my left cheek is a blind pimple. It grew a little bit larger overnight. I feel another small one growing on my right cheek too. Other than those two, I don't have any other active acne on my face. Pretty nice to be only concerned about two rather small bumps on my face. My red marks from previous breakouts look great as well. After being stubbornly red for so long, they're finally settling down to a manageable state.

I might try boiling some water and trying an old-school pore cleansing technique. Sounds like its worth a shot for these blind pimples. Then I'll use this mask to close my pores so I don't get any more infections. I figure I might as well take advantage of the time I have left to do these sorts of things before the dryness starts to get really bad.

In other news, I finally got a cover I did on my MySpace if anyone is curious. (A shameless whoring of myself, I know) I hope anyone who checks it out enjoys it!

http://www.myspace.com/hamiltoncomehome

"Sing with your head up, with your eyes closed. Not because you love the song, because you love to sing..."

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I take back the dryness. I really notice it now after getting out of the shower. I'm going to have to use some moisturizer starting today.

The steam idea was nice - it felt really refreshing. Did a little exfoliating afterwards and then a mask for 10 minutes after. We'll see how my skin fares for the rest of the day.

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I take back the dryness. I really notice it now after getting out of the shower. I'm going to have to use some moisturizer starting today.

The steam idea was nice - it felt really refreshing. Did a little exfoliating afterwards and then a mask for 10 minutes after. We'll see how my skin fares for the rest of the day.

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Good luck! I will be reading your log to keep up with your progress. Its a long road but its worth it! I am almost to month three and its flown by. :)

PS - Is that you singing on that Death Cab cover? Thats really awesome!! You are really talented.

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I take back the dryness. I really notice it now after getting out of the shower. I'm going to have to use some moisturizer starting today.

The steam idea was nice - it felt really refreshing. Did a little exfoliating afterwards and then a mask for 10 minutes after. We'll see how my skin fares for the rest of the day.

meh.. Your acne realy aint that bad dude!! Anyways Good luck!!

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Thanks for the best wishes :D I appreciate it! And...I'm hoping only the best for you too! Good Luck! Thanks for the advice...you are so right. I'm not worried anymore and I agree, focus = me. Thanks! I'll keep up with your progress and look forward to reading how you are doing.

I checked out your cover - awesome dude! You are very talented. I wish I could sing- a talent I dream for. Of course, I sing - loudly in the car and shower...that doesn't count for awesomeness like you have ;)

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Day 5

My red marks from older breakouts are looking better which I credit mostly to this nightly repair cream I've been using. The clogged pore on my left cheek had evolved into a small cyst by last night but today it's not very raised. It just looks red in the surround area a bit. There was an even smaller one that popped up last night on my right cheek but my skin is completely smooth besides the redness it left behind.

The dryness still isn't that noticeable besides these outlines of circles around my cheeks. It must be a bunch of small bumps drying up since that's what my face would look like at the beginning of the summer when I started going out more. Another odd thing to note which I can't attribute directly to Accutane is the soreness of my nose. Not like there's a breakout waiting to happen since I don't see or feel any problems areas but it feels like I got hit in the nose or something.

I had a slightly bad headache last night as well but I'm feeling good today besides the soreness of my nose, haha.

"If you can walk you can dance. If you can talk you can sing."

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Day 7

So everything has been going pretty well. No huge breakouts or horrible side effects. My nose is still sore to the touch and that soreness has traveled to inbetween my mouth and the bottom of my chin. Nothing horrible, just a slight soreness when it's touched. My face is starting to become a little red and the dryness has definitely set in. It actually looks like I'm peeling from light sunburn. Even my nose is dry which never happens.

Other than that my face is looking good. I'm staying positive during this whole thing because I know I'll be happy when it's all over with. My red marks are doing well also. Both of the cysts are pretty much nonexistent on my face besides red marks that aren't even that bad.

I think this drug gets too much heat from people that either exaggerate the side effects they experience or just don't get immediate results, causing frustration. Either way, I'll probably get pictures up later tonight or tomorrow.

"This is the sound of settling."

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I remember feeling really sore in my first month. My skin felt...different, and heavy. It was so strange. I can report at the end of my second month that that feeling has gone away. :)

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Day 8

So it's officially been a week since I started and I've to admit I'm pretty pleased thus far. My face is staying pretty clear. The two small cysts I had are basically gone besides light red marks and I got one other zit that popped up yesterday along my right jawline, but it's already starting to go away. Red marks are continuing to fade. Some days are better than others for how red they appear. I'm not entirely sure why but I'm doing my best to take care of my skin.

The dryness is definitely there. I've noticed a lot of skin drying up all over my body. My stomach and arms most notably. Nothing horrendous but if you really look you can tell. One thing I find a bit odd is that it seems like my IB, if it's even that is coming up on my back. Now I've always had a bit of acne on my chest and back but I've noticed in the past few days that more pimples are deciding to pop up. Nothing horrendous but my shoulders were starting to clear up but now I have about three or four new ones. If that's the case, hey, I rather have an IB there than on my face. We'll see how next week goes. I guess by the third week we'll know if I'm going to get an IB or not.

I'll have pictures up later tonight when I get back from work if anyone's curious to see the comparison between when I started and one full week.

Have a good weekend everyone!

"Jynx me something crazy."

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Day 9

Quick update before I go to work.

So I start classes up again tomorrow, sort of not looking forward to that but I'll deal. Anyway, my face has been behaving pretty well. One small whitehead was on my left jawline this morning but I'm assuming it'll go away soon since it's tiny. The dryness isn't too bad but I'm noticing more and more how my entire body is feeling dried out so I'm making sure I drink enough water everyday. Last night my lips felt like they were on fire so I guess the dryness for those are starting up. Besides that, there's not too much going on. I'll be done with my first pack of 10 pills tomorrow so soon enough I'll be half-way through my first month!

Here are the pictures from last night on Day 8. Face looks a little more red than usual since I just hopped out of the shower before I took these.

Right side:

http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/4498/p1000084mj4.jpg

Left side:

http://img527.imageshack.us/img527/9291/p1000085xs9.jpg

Anyway, hope everyone's weekend went well. On to another week!

"The Atlantic was born yesterday, and I'll tell you how."

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Days 10 and 11

Finished my first pack of pills yesterday, so I'm feeling pretty good about that. However, I'm noticing the dryness keeps getting worse. Especially on my body, which sounds strange. My stomach in particular is really dry. My lips are also starting to peel a little but still no huge breakouts - normally one or two new bumps every other day - but they quickly go away.

My red marks are continuing to heal up which really makes me feel a whole lot better about my face considering theres very few new ones to worry about. My complexion is, for the first time in a while, looking pretty decent.

Still a pretty long ways from fully clear but I'm definitely pleased with how things have been going. We'll see how they rest of this week turns out.

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Day 12

Nothing really new to report yet. Two small spots came up on my chin last night but that's all. Still nothing as bad as before I went on Accutane which is making me feel really great about my skin. A lot of my red marks are continuing to fade a lot. I moisturize in the morning after I shower and that's generally all I need to get through the day. I'll probably take pictures again this weekend to mark my second week.

Nothing else that's really interesting to report so I hope everyone has a good day!

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Days 13-14

So my face has been looking pretty good. However, I'm experiencing some badass dryness, haha. My entire body has flaky skin. Most noticeable are my legs and arms besides my face. My lips hurt pretty badly if I don't use chapstick so that has become a daily thing now since my bottom lip split last night. I had a small whitehead come up near my mouth on the right side and a small bump near my right temple but that's all as of today.

As far as other side effects are concerned, I've only noticed that I'm a little bit more tired at the end of the day and that I drink more water. I feel really emotional today but I think that has to do with more of my situation with my ex than uncontrollable sadness. Either way tomorrow marks the second full week so I'll try to get pictures up for sure.

Hope everyone has a good Friday!

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Day 15

So it's officially been two weeks since I started and things are looking good. Still no major breakout that I'd consider an IB, so we'll see if that changes in the following week but I really don't think so. One small whitehead seemed to pop up near the left side of my chin and another sore bump near my right temple. Other than that I don't really notice anything else that's new.

Like I've been saying the dryness is pretty bad but I'll take that over a break out any idea. My lips however, are really bad. I'm gonna try to pick up some of that Aquaphor stuff because they're peeling a lot more now. If I don't put anything on them they hurt pretty badly. I've started wearing my glasses now because my eyes get pretty dry without my contacts, so I don't even want to know how they'd get with them in.

Anyway, like I promised, here are some pictures of me this morning. I've been getting lazy with shaving because my skin is so sensitive. Especially along my right jawline. I don't know what it is about that part of my face but I always manage to get a bunch of little nicks so I decided to just shave maybe every other day and that when I do, I'm very careful.

EDIT: Apparently imageshack doesn't want to work right now so I'll try to upload the pictures later.

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Hey just dropping by to say good luck with your treatment im only on day 3 but so far so good! only had slight headache and abit achy muscles hopefully it wont get worse than that!

My skin is starting to dry up now too ive been slapping on tons of moisturiser morning and night and vaseline on lips!

Anyway best of luck :D

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Day 16

Stupid cyst decided to pop up near my right temple over night. It's not enormous but it's definitely a step backwards from how my skin was looking beforehand. Other than that there's nothing else that's really too new. I've got some facial redness but nothing too bad. Hopefully this cyst goes away fairly quickly.

As for anyone who's curious, I'm currently taking 40mg/day so we'll see how that goes when I see my derm in a week or two.

Also, I finally got the pictures uploaded from yesterday. This is how I look as of Day 15;

http://img221.imageshack.us/img221/9361/p1000090zd4.jpg

http://img529.imageshack.us/img529/7204/p1000091te3.jpg

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Wicked progress! Another couple of weeks and you should be in the clear, then its just a matter of meeting the dosage req's!

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Yeah man, I'm really happy with my progress. I mean sure the cyst or whatever it is that came up on my right temple is annoying but it's already going down so I can't complain too much!

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