Jump to content
Acne.org
Search In
Find results that contain...
Find results in...

Recommended Posts

well.. having acne for most of my life, i think ive just become insecure, depressed, and antisocial. I wouldn't want to be seen without foundation and i stay in my house pretty much every day. In a weird way tho.. ive gotten use to it through the years.. and i see no need to socialize but yet i know its unhealthy not to. what bothers me most is the fact that i told myself that i would try and get through this year without putting myself out there.. and try and glide through senior year without getting involved with too many people, because ill be nice to their face..b ut ill feel bad when they ask me to hang out and i always say no, or make up an excuse. because i know i tend to do this. i usually try not to even make friends with them.. or tlak to people that much so they dont get the wrong idea.. i dont want to play anyone.. but people then usually think im just a flake.

I know that wherever i go people are oddly attracted to my personality.. and i cant help but talk to them when they speak to me. i get offers from good looking guys all the time.. and i always have to makeup some excuse.. like i have a boyfriend or i cant make it .. I feel it has become a perpetual cycle, and that i internalize everything and end up taking it out on myself. it just makes me feel like i wont be able to get through this year without making a fool of myself. i wish i could just not b bothered with people, but then again being around all these people who wanna b my friend.. its hard to just say no to chill with them sometimes. Emotionally, i feel i have nothing to offer them. in all seriousness i would be lying to myself and them if i said i was compatible with their interests. having this skin disease, i believe has made me such a stronger person.. that ive just moved on form peoplel and "friends" contorlling my life, and how i live, that i just wan to b left alone. but everyday people bother me about hanging out with them.. and im kinda stuck and embarassed about the whole situation. i feel like an ass.. and if i had my way i would just not go at all.

anyone else in a similar situation?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So, a self-destructing habit is stopping you from forming relationships with people you like? Take the advice and talk to a professional, you'll feel good about going in the end. Cause we all have them, you just need to accept it to so you can change your life in the way that you want to.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Emotionally, i feel i have nothing to offer them. in all seriousness i would be lying to myself and them if i said i was compatible with their interests. having this skin disease, i believe has made me such a stronger person.. that ive just moved on form peoplel and "friends" contorlling my life, and how i live, that i just wan to b left alone. but everyday people bother me about hanging out with them.. and im kinda stuck and embarassed about the whole situation. i feel like an ass.. and if i had my way i would just not go at all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I accept any offers or invitations to socialize, unless I'm too busy to accept, which I often am. In which case, I say that "**** no! Not with the ****loads of work that I have to do."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I usually accept offers to go out, but when I don't feel like going out, I just tell people I'm tired and I can get away with that because I look like I'm always tired and half asleep and I'm always sleeping in my classes. =/

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah i get the guilts as well :S i prefer to say im mentally attached to someone (which is true). Going on a date next Wednesday though....which will be interesting, and i dont know how to say "sorry im not interested in you like that".

Either way, just make something up - nothing worse than saying yes because you feel pressured too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Haw, I'm sitting here waiting for someone to turn up because I've spent the last three months making up excuses and my creativity has turned dry. :( WE'RE SUCH FAILURES

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have the opposite problem. I dont have people invite me out places except my parents. I would gladly go out if someone invited me somewhere but that never happens so I have to live with that :(

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

see! ha its so strange no one has this problem... think i might have to look into a therapist.. which another scary thing. i just dont even fully understand my problem. ; (

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

the key to breaking threw acne is understanding that educated, good people do not care about it. They realize it is out of your control, and do nor judge you for this.

People who are ignorant and judge you for your acne should be avoided.

BUT, because these people are asking you to chill or whatever, we can assume that your acne doesn;t bother them, and you shouldn't be embarassed. Staying home is the absolut worst thing, and very unhealthy. you need to get your mind off of your acne and have fun!

of course, easier said the done

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

yeah i feel u. i think we need suggestions on how to get out and movin without feelin self concious. cuz now.. its like.. even people i like im a little scared to hang out with.. its bad. but i think im ganna push myself to hang out and b comfortable as much as possible. after all.. i only have this left

this year left*

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i understand where you are coming from.

my personality is too nice that i struggle to say noto anyone.

i'm always afraid to hurt anyones delicate feelings, although i can clearly say mine is a bit more fragile than others.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, those of you who've admitted that you have a problem with accepting invitations are actually taking that first step towards solving it.

Wonderbread's post is very accurate; lonerism becomes a habit. It's one I have to work at breaking, too. When I do break the habit, I'm pleased I did so. It becomes worth the effort to go out and be sociable; to be with people and just talk about nothing or something.

If you just don't want to socialize with a particular person, just politely say you have other plans.

If you do want to socialize but lack the energy or happiness to go; try to make yourself go out and socialize at least once a month. Set a date in advance and do not break it! When you get yourself into the habit of going out with a friend or two, it begins to be very enjoyable and certainly helps break the self-imposed shell of exile.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

OMG I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM .. LIKE I JUST STARTED GOING TO COLLEGE AND I MET PEOPLE OR WHATEVER, THEY CLAL ME EVERYDAY TO COME CHILL AND IM ALWAYS LIKE IM SORRY, IM SICK .. OR WHATEVER EEEEVVERYTIME EVEN WHEN I WANT TO GO.. IM LIKE EW NO MY FACE IS SO BAD TODAY I CANT GO IN PUBLIC... THEYRE GONNA GET SICK N TIRED OF ME MAKING EXCUSES AND IM GONNA HAVE NO1... BUT IM GETTIN USE TO IT AND I DONT WANT TO , I WANNA BE NORMAL AGAIN I USE 2 BE SO SOCIAL, ALWAYS OUT. MY SKIN WAS NEVER BAD UNTIL ABOUT A MONTH AGO AFTER I SWITCHED BIRTH CONTROL PILLS& IT F'ED UP MY HORMONES... ITS DEPRESSING.. MY FRIENDS NO ABOUT MY SKIN OR W/E BUT THEY DONT UNDERSTAND HOW I GET SO OVERLLY DEPRESSED ABOUT IT & THATS WHY I RLY DONT WANNA HANG OUT WIT THEM.. LIKE IM ALWAYS LIKE WELL ILL WAIT TILL MY SKINS CLEAR, THEN ILL HANG OUT WIT THIS 1.. AND I NO THATS WRONG !!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
OMG I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM .. LIKE I JUST STARTED GOING TO COLLEGE AND I MET PEOPLE OR WHATEVER, THEY CLAL ME EVERYDAY TO COME CHILL AND IM ALWAYS LIKE IM SORRY, IM SICK .. OR WHATEVER EEEEVVERYTIME EVEN WHEN I WANT TO GO.. IM LIKE EW NO MY FACE IS SO BAD TODAY I CANT GO IN PUBLIC... THEYRE GONNA GET SICK N TIRED OF ME MAKING EXCUSES AND IM GONNA HAVE NO1... BUT IM GETTIN USE TO IT AND I DONT WANT TO , I WANNA BE NORMAL AGAIN I USE 2 BE SO SOCIAL, ALWAYS OUT. MY SKIN WAS NEVER BAD UNTIL ABOUT A MONTH AGO AFTER I SWITCHED BIRTH CONTROL PILLS& IT F'ED UP MY HORMONES... ITS DEPRESSING.. MY FRIENDS NO ABOUT MY SKIN OR W/E BUT THEY DONT UNDERSTAND HOW I GET SO OVERLLY DEPRESSED ABOUT IT & THATS WHY I RLY DONT WANNA HANG OUT WIT THEM.. LIKE IM ALWAYS LIKE WELL ILL WAIT TILL MY SKINS CLEAR, THEN ILL HANG OUT WIT THIS 1.. AND I NO THATS WRONG !!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

yeahh... this is encouraging but still, its hard for me to even explain myself to peopel about it most of the time. and now that im in a big school. its worse. like for me, when im alone.. i feel ttoally empowered.. and i know.. why i dont socialize.. and yet i know that i am doing and htinking other thinkings... im almost happy with myself outside of people. But-- its just so har.d. when ure reality is people who dont understand you.. and it feels almost liek they will "find me out" or realize i am this way... and i will feel like crap. like ive been so social int he past.. but its just like ive left everyone ive ever had a relationship with.,.. because i couldnt really bring them into my life. and honestly.. i dont see too many people i would actually WANT to have a sociable relationship with . there r so many people now in my life.. that seem to want me to hang with themm and b another "normal teen" .. but im just not.. im not into that.. its a waste of time.. and more over.. i have social phobia.. so its like fuck. im so alone in this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Emotionally, i feel i have nothing to offer them. in all seriousness i would be lying to myself and them if i said i was compatible with their interests. having this skin disease, i believe has made me such a stronger person.. that ive just moved on form peoplel and "friends" contorlling my life, and how i live, that i just wan to b left alone. but everyday people bother me about hanging out with them.. and im kinda stuck and embarassed about the whole situation. i feel like an ass.. and if i had my way i would just not go at all.

I can't imagine you really think that acne has made you stronger by being able to transcend the enslavement and the essentiality of normal human interactions and relationships. Sounds more like a rationalization to me, because making relationships with people and friends is a strength, not a weakness.

I know what you mean though, once you stop going out with friends, and socializing less, it becomes easier and easier and turns into a habit, and socializing just seems like a hassle. But I don't think that this is proper... it's a habit that should be broken.

But then again, here you are on these boards, so I guess you do desire some social interaction. Do you like talking online to people / friends / people who want to be your friends, but not in person?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Don't say no at all. Life is short. Think about it this way: you are probably only going to live a little under 30,000 days. If you think like that then you will be partying 24/7. Think in days and you will play hehe.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

im currently in the position where most of my friends that i have known drifted away. but im ok with that the closest ones are still here for now... but i havent gone out or chilled with them for about 6 months now. they ask me to go but i cant cause over the past year my acne and scarring has just been crazy. but i have gotten used to staying home and dont mind it but i get the guilty feeling.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
yeahh... this is encouraging but still, its hard for me to even explain myself to peopel about it most of the time. and now that im in a big school. its worse. like for me, when im alone.. i feel ttoally empowered.. and i know.. why i dont socialize.. and yet i know that i am doing and htinking other thinkings... im almost happy with myself outside of people. But-- its just so har.d. when ure reality is people who dont understand you.. and it feels almost liek they will "find me out" or realize i am this way... and i will feel like crap. like ive been so social int he past.. but its just like ive left everyone ive ever had a relationship with.,.. because i couldnt really bring them into my life. and honestly.. i dont see too many people i would actually WANT to have a sociable relationship with . there r so many people now in my life.. that seem to want me to hang with themm and b another "normal teen" .. but im just not.. im not into that.. its a waste of time.. and more over.. i have social phobia.. so its like fuck. im so alone in this

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yeah i get the guilts as well :S i prefer to say im mentally attached to someone (which is true). Going on a date next Wednesday though....which will be interesting, and i dont know how to say "sorry im not interested in you like that".

Either way, just make something up - nothing worse than saying yes because you feel pressured too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Personalized Advice Quiz - All of Acne.org in just a few minutes

×