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ike345

People Just Don't Get It

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Maybe its just me, but...

It seems like no one else has the capacity to understand how something like acne can seriously destroy one's social life and confidence. No one understands how it is all I think about, how it consumes my life and dominates everything I do excluding when I'm alone. Maybe other people are able to cope with it, and strongly depending on the situation, I can sometimes as well, but for the most part its just a daily struggle - the first thing I think about in the morning, and the last thing I think of before going to sleep.

It's sad that something such as the lighting can transform my character and confidence so severely, but it can. It's sad how I KNOW that people who know me well see past it, and yet I steel feel uneasy conversing with them. Even though I pretend to be secure about my face, I'm not, and as long as things stay the way they are I doubt I'll ever be. It's sad that I get depressed simply by looking at other people's photos, knowing that my teenage years are gone and no medicine can ever bring them back. I've had acne for about 5 years, making me now eighteen - a senior in high school.

The worst part about my acne, and most other "moderate" (sure...) acne, however, is that there's no symptoms other than visual. Nobody seems to considerate it traumatizing or damaging, despite the reality.

Just recently my mom told me the "damage is done", after I prompted her to help me figure out how to get started on accutane, which unbeknownst to her made me depressed for the rest of the night. As if I didn't feel bad enough about its current state. For years I've been assuming it would go away eventually, but now I'm beginning to doubt that.

I've read lots of posts on here saying "Just don't think about it" and stuff like that... but it takes a certain kind of person to be able to do so. I wish, believe me, I wish I could just forget about it and go on living my life, but lying to myself isn't going to make anything go away, and I'm sure as long as its as bad as it is, I won't "forget" about it.

Ok thats the end of my rant. I'm sure I could go on forever but I'm getting tired.

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It's not that people don't understand it, because I'm sure they can imagine it. I mean to be honest, it doesn't have to be acne on your face to experience insecurities, a nose for example can do that for some.

What people don't want to think about is that there are certain bad extras that come with acne, cause now you have to do this whole routine or 10, plus the most annoying emotion of all because it creates this frame, in which you are in powerless because you don't know how you're gonna look the next day which makes it hard to accept, uncertainty (That last line is the reason there's even mention on this board sometime that God has anything to do with it, if you're Christian, and something is out of your control, you quickly look up.).

What is even more true though, is that even though acne is to most degree out of your control, it hardly has to mean that acne controls you, and it's really just that what makes one person different then the next.

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It's not that people don't understand it, because I'm sure they can imagine it. I mean to be honest, it doesn't have to be acne on your face to experience insecurities, a nose for example can do that for some.

What people don't want to think about is that there are certain bad extras that come with acne, cause now you have to do this whole routine or 10, plus the most annoying emotion of all because it creates this frame, in which you are in powerless because you don't know how you're gonna look the next day which makes it hard to accept, uncertainty (That last line is the reason there's even mention on this board sometime that God has anything to do with it, if you're Christian, and something is out of your control, you quickly look up.).

What is even more true though, is that even though acne is to most degree out of your control, it hardly has to mean that acne controls you, and it's really just that what makes one person different then the next.

I see what your saying here but i have to disagree with the first part. Having a big nose or being overwieght is different from having acne IMO. Firstly as you said when it comes to acne there is uncertainty but when it comes to having a large nose etc its something you have to accept, something you are forced to accept and something you have to live with, if your overwieght you have the option of working hard to do something about it. Whereas with Acne is something you simply have no control over and that feeling of powerlessness combined with the fact that your spending X amount of cash on millions of different products 90% of which wont work is worse then being insecure about a body feature.

Secondly Since no one with clear skin really cares about acne no one really cares to understand it. Whereas when it comes to being insecure about a certain body part Everybody has experienced this and therefore can relate. Acne on the other hand is not exactly something everyone goes through, and for the small minority with anything from moderate to severe acne, Most clear skinned people havent a fucking clue about what we have to go through

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i've always pondered the question would i rather be overweight or have acne, and every single time i'd pick being overweight. The things i did for my skin, required so much discipline and sacrifices that losing some weight seems a lot less troublesome. Then i spose you have all the excess skin and shit to deal with, which could be just as depressing as scarring.

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i've always pondered the question would i rather be overweight or have acne, and every single time i'd pick being overweight. The things i did for my skin, required so much discipline and sacrifices that losing some weight seems a lot less troublesome. Then i spose you have all the excess skin and shit to deal with, which could be just as depressing as scarring.

Hahah I do this all the time. Like, would I rather have (insert physical malformity) or acne? I too, would rather be overweight than pimply. Seriously though.... I don't know what I was ever insecure about before having acne. Life was great! I would kill to go back to those days. Well maybe not kill.....or would I?...... ok just kidding again.

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I see what your saying here but i have to disagree with the first part. Having a big nose or being overwieght is different from having acne IMO.

Dude, that's like, exactly what I'm saying, maybe you should read it again.

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I just find it astounding that Acne is hard hard to cure.

Its definately dislodged my previous view on modern science. I thought that everything was written in a big book, all situations accounted for.

Doesn't stop science thinking it can't play with brains though.

Sometimes I just think: Lets get things in the right order here - You fix the acne first, for good, then I'll take it from there with the regaining confidence and personality altering. Fix the root of the problem rather than bending me around it.

In an off-the-cuff kind of way (I realise its a little tactless) I joked with my doctor about CBT. I said something along the lines of attaching electricity plugs to my head and being turned into a robot. He told me that 'Electro Convulsive Therapy' exists but that I wouldn't be getting it. It was light hearted but I was shocked (bad choice of word).

Sometimes its all a bit backward at moving forward.

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I see what your saying here but i have to disagree with the first part. Having a big nose or being overwieght is different from having acne IMO.

Dude, that's like, exactly what I'm saying, maybe you should read it again.

Heh heh oh yeah, i was tired last night :redface:

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I totally understand how you're feeling, in fact i think most people here are going or went through what you're going through. Acne is definitely the only problem in my life, its the only thing that keeps me from being happy. I see all these people with clear skin and i feel happy for them and sad for myself both at the same time. I also understand how even if you talk about it with your friends and how acne is ruining your life, it still woudln't help becuase after that '' talk'' you'll still feel sad becuase youll still have acne.

The only thing i can say to help you is God did this to you and to all of us for some reason he wants us to experiance the depression and grief. I believe hes doing this to better prepare us for the upcoming sad events in our lives so perhaps once your acne is CLEAREd! AND ALL BETTER! and you face a problem like say a failed test or your girlfriend/boyfriend breaks up with you. Then you'll just say HEY AT LEAST I HAVE CLEAR SKIN this is no biggie ^^ thats how i would think =]

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The only thing i can say to help you is God did this to you and to all of us for some reason he wants us to experiance the depression and grief. I believe hes doing this to better prepare us for the upcoming sad events in our lives so perhaps once your acne is CLEAREd! AND ALL BETTER! and you face a problem like say a failed test or your girlfriend/boyfriend breaks up with you. Then you'll just say HEY AT LEAST I HAVE CLEAR SKIN this is no biggie ^^ thats how i would think =]

thats cute but overly optimistic for my liking

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I totally understand how you're feeling, in fact i think most people here are going or went through what you're going through. Acne is definitely the only problem in my life, its the only thing that keeps me from being happy. I see all these people with clear skin and i feel happy for them and sad for myself both at the same time. I also understand how even if you talk about it with your friends and how acne is ruining your life, it still woudln't help becuase after that '' talk'' you'll still feel sad becuase youll still have acne.

The only thing i can say to help you is God did this to you and to all of us for some reason he wants us to experiance the depression and grief. I believe hes doing this to better prepare us for the upcoming sad events in our lives so perhaps once your acne is CLEAREd! AND ALL BETTER! and you face a problem like say a failed test or your girlfriend/boyfriend breaks up with you. Then you'll just say HEY AT LEAST I HAVE CLEAR SKIN this is no biggie ^^ thats how i would think =]

acne is really the only problem in your life? somehow i doubt that.... i think you're projecting too much. if it weren't acne, it'd be something else.

God gave me acne for a reason?? you really believe that? i think God made us who we are, but i don't think God "gave" me acne. i think shit happens, and acne is one of the shits in life i have to deal with.

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acne is really the only problem in your life? somehow i doubt that.... i think you're projecting too much. if it weren't acne, it'd be something else.

Acne is definately the only real problem in my life. I have other problems but those are managable. Acne however......

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I can sometimes as well, but for the most part its just a daily struggle - the first thing I think about in the morning, and the last thing I think of before going to sleep.

Truth, truth, truth. I'm consumed by this disease. My sexual, affective, love life goes with tied hands with acne. My life was destroyed because of Acne. And no damn dermatologist seem to believe that, when they TELL YOU TO WAIT for other medicines or wait to damn 2 months to have another consult.

Acne is definately the only real problem in my life. I have other problems but those are managable. Acne however......

Truth.

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Bleh blehhhh i know how you feel :[

i always lacked assertiveness and self confidence even when my skin WAS clear but now WITH acne, it's just nonexistent. period. i probably look in the mirror at LEASTTTTT 58 times a day. sometimes i do it really fast and squint my eyes first just to ADAPT lol.... kind of prepare myself for the horror.. umm and it sucks a lot that i cringe every time i look in the mirror. its definitely NOT HEALTHY and i definitely feel very anxious/paranoid/antisocial due to my skin.

because of my acne

i ammmmmm

quitting my job

transferring to a different school

not leaving the house EVERRRRRRRRRRRR

its quite sad

i should be on meds but i cant afford a therapist or anything

so

it pretty much sucks

MY LIFEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I hear what you're saying... all I can ever think about is my acne. Is my makeup rubbing off? Are they studying my face? What do they think of me? Is there another zit coming right there? How does my face look in this lighting? If I put my hair just like this, maybe it will be less noticeable....

and on and on and on and on.

I don't think people understand that when I look in the mirror, I feel like my face is disfigured. Sometimes I just wish I could rip it off!!!!

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I totally understand how you're feeling, in fact i think most people here are going or went through what you're going through. Acne is definitely the only problem in my life, its the only thing that keeps me from being happy. I see all these people with clear skin and i feel happy for them and sad for myself both at the same time. I also understand how even if you talk about it with your friends and how acne is ruining your life, it still woudln't help becuase after that '' talk'' you'll still feel sad becuase youll still have acne.

The only thing i can say to help you is God did this to you and to all of us for some reason he wants us to experiance the depression and grief. I believe hes doing this to better prepare us for the upcoming sad events in our lives so perhaps once your acne is CLEAREd! AND ALL BETTER! and you face a problem like say a failed test or your girlfriend/boyfriend breaks up with you. Then you'll just say HEY AT LEAST I HAVE CLEAR SKIN this is no biggie ^^ thats how i would think =]

so what happens when your left with all the scars once the acne is gone. Scars are so much harder to get rid of, and most r there for life.

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my friend fukn freaks out if she gets a mild pimple and im like stfuk! If you went through what I went through you would like kill urself and she admitted it. (lets just say she would take it worse than me and I hit bottom bad) anyway I asked a question if she would radther be chesty with lots of acne or flat with perfect skin. she said lots of acne and boobs. Said that if you have lots of acne its ok cuz its not like theres just one big pimple to get fixated on and boobs help.

idk how that ties in with this...just a thought I had lol

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