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CrystalFishes

"Hey look it's another one!" Accutane Log

y hullo thar!

I was on Accutane before, back in '03, but stopped when my acne spread from my forehead and chin to ALL over my cheeks, shoulders, and lower back! I should have stuck with it, because now for the past few years, it's taken up what feels like a permanant residence all over my face... D'oh. I don't leave the house without lots of makeup, but a lot of the time it doesn't cover much, and I can never wear anything backless. I have a lot of red marks, and the big deep painful pimples on my cheeks and jawline, plus --I think once it's all done-- a pretty depressing amount of scarring all over.

Originally I was planning on making a private Livejournal and keep records for myself, because last time, all I saw were bad things happening. I'm going to see the whole thing through this time, and try to think positive. I don't think I have to tell you guys how hard that is sometimes (but people who've never had bad skin just don't get how much it affects your life and how you feel about yourself). When I buy new camera batteries, I'll see about getting some pictures up, maybe.

Anyhow, I am on...

Day 9

I am kind of ashamed to admit it, especially on my first post, but I am supposed to be at work right now. I had to call in sick because I couldn't stand the idea of people looking at me today, I feel so awful.

I've spent the past hour and a half reading other people's logs, and hoping Accutane works so well for me.

As for side effects so far, the dry eyes I got from my first foray into 'tane have never really gotten better, and now they're pretty uncomfortable. So no contacts for me for a while! It's a good excuse to buy new frames for my glasses though... Dry lips, too, but so far I've been okay with keeping on top of it. My red marks are very VERY red, makeup isn't helping.

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hi crystalfishes..i'm now on my week 2(14 days mark).. just dropping by.. to wish u best of luck :P..

i've also tried Tane on early 2005..and stopped due to big breakout as well as super hyperpigmentation.. but well.. after many other kind of treatment..think Tane is back again as my ultimate move..lolz.. although now i'm experiencing breakout.. but at least.. the hyperpigmentation isnt there anymore..

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i've also tried Tane on early 2005..and stopped due to big breakout as well as super hyperpigmentation.. but well.. after many other kind of treatment..think Tane is back again as my ultimate move..

Ugh same here. I swear I have tried everything in the four years between 'tane treatments. I have COMPLETELY changed my diet and tried all natural remedies, almost everything that says 'for acne prone skin' I have bought and tried out, done anti-biotics and birth control... I'm exactly the kind of person cosmetic companies must love, always looking for a miracle cure! :rolleyes:

Good luck to you too :D

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Day 10

No initial breakout on the face yet, but my shoulderblades and lower back have gone crazy. They're not even pimples, just red spots. Luckily summer is over so it's back to sweaters and turtlenecks for me.

My eyes are killing me, gotta stop wearing contacts soon! I'm getting killer headaches, but I'm not sure if that's the Accutane, or just me having headaches :shifty: Are headaches one of the side effects?

No good things to report yet, and still no pics.

I have a question though, if anyone sees it:

What makes a dermatologist decide what dosage to put someone on? My acne is moderate or worse, and it looks like a lot of people with much better skin than mine were started on over twice my dose! I'm only on 20mg a day, and others are on 60 or 80!

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Day 12

Just woke up, so far so good. My moisturizer has been working really nicely (it's from an anti acne kit I ordered, but before it arrived in the mail I was started on 'tane so I can't use it right now) and it has SPF 30 sunblock so no burning! I'm surprised my face didn't EXPLODE overnight, I can't stop picking at it before I go to bed! I'll be telling myself 'okay just LEAVE it alone...' and then realize I'm poking away anyhow. Ugh! *tries to grow some willpower*

No improvement on the jawline, I don't even know what these things are, they're big and deep and they HURT. Sometimes they come to a very tiny head, but usually they just hang out underneath to piss me off.

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Heyy im also on 20 mg on day 5 :D

I hope all goes well with your acne im sure we will be great in no time:D !!it will work!!

I advise you get Aveeno Ultra Calming spf 15 moisturiser, night cream & facial wash!! i dont actually use them as in the uk it is hard to get them from the u.s but i no these are the best for reducing redness and cutting out dryness:D

xx

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Day 16

Quick update before scooting off to art class.

Saw derm yesterday, who upped my dose to 40mg a day. NOW I'm feeling it. My eyes are really yucky feeling, and I can feel my skin drying out. Looked AWFUL today, and I just know it 'll be much much worse before it gets better.

I would be so pleased if I noticed one nice side effect. Just one! That's all I ask!

I feel a breakout coming on... I don't know if I can go to work if that happens... :confused:

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I advise you get Aveeno Ultra Calming spf 15 moisturiser, night cream & facial wash!! i dont actually use them as in the uk it is hard to get them from the u.s but i no these are the best for reducing redness and cutting out dryness:D

xx

Thanks! <3

I was looking into those, I know Aveeno is amazing stuff! I'll have to try to find it somewhere in Canada (or someone who will ship here... lousy drugstore.com.... )

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Day 17

So tiiired... I've felt completely wiped out since the first few days on Accutane, but I'm not sure if it's a side effect or because I'm stressed out about it. :confused:

I think my back is calming itself a little bit, at least it seems like it, so that's good news for me. Face is about the same, plus a big sucker on my neck.... :boohoo: Sigh.

Camera batteries are charging (yay) so pictures (with AND without (dundunduuuun) makeup) soon.

Laundry now, then precious, precious sleep... <3

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Day 18

:naughty:

stoppickingstoppickingstoppickingstoppickingstoppickingstoppickingstoppicking

On another note, I ordered some of that Aveeno lotion that Steven recommended. It sounds like good stuff! Should be coming in soon, and if I like it I'll try the cleanser out too.

The billions of blackheads on my nose look HUGE. I don't remember this happening my first time on Accutane, BUT my hair isn't oily! Hooray! Normally if I don't wash it every morning, it is disgusting by noon. Now I can skip a day! Or two! :dance:

stoppickingstoppicking.

yes.

SO much to do, I'll bet if I took a vacation my skin would get 100x better. Stress just kills me! Work, conventions to prepare for (art stuff), more work...

GAH!

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Day 22

Almost 1 month down!

One good side effect to cling to! My hair looks great :D I wash it 3 times a week now, with conditioner only in between and it feels great. The conditioner days make it feel so sooooft :wub:

Also kinda good, back is getting better, but still overall yucky. I wouldn't wear anything that shows my shoulders or lower back...

Bad-er: it looks like all of the clogged pores on my cheeks are planning on coming to surface at once. The texture of my skin is badbadbad right now, especially in certain lighting. I try not to think about it and the people I work with are great (they don't stare or look at me differently or anything) but mostly I am still feeling bad. I can't wait for these things to clear themselves out so I can start getting better! My jawline/neck too...

Awesome products: I just bought Aveeno Essential Moisture lip conditioner since the 40mg was destroying my lips on my old stuff. It feels GREAT, keeping them smooth so far. AND I just got the new moisturizer in the mail, the Aveeno Ultra Calming spf 15 moisturizer. Haven't used it yet, but I hope it helps deal with the redness.

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Day 23

Finally took some pictures... I decided against any with makeup, because really, there isn't any point. The point is that I would like to be able to NOT wear makeup, and still be able to function normally.

So I have this gallery thing now. Let's see if I can link individual pictures from it...

Forehead in bad lighting.

Left cheek.

Right cheek. This is the better one.

Okay so I can't figure out how to link pictures. Oh weeeell! So yeah I would take a picture of my gross back too, but it's a little bit tough to do it myself, and I won't let anyone see it. No one even sees me without makeup other than my family, and that's just because I have to live with them. My boyfriend has never seen me without any (I sleep in it when I'm over, even. Which is bad for my skin too, I know, I just can't take it off...)

As for skin today: bad. The lip balm is working wonderfully though, and I still like the lotion. I really really hope I don't break out all at once. Just a little at a time, please!

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Day 24

I think I'll do a picture update every week or so, now that my camera is behaving. I think keeping a picture log will really help me keep things in perspective (in terms of improvements and such).

So, recent things: yesterday I had to wear my glasses, my eyes were red all day, even with eyedrops, I must have looked SOOooo on drugs... But today they were fine, I even wore contacts again. Weird.

My yucky blackheady sandpapery nose is SO smooth right now! I didn't realize how many blackheads were evacuating until I took my makeup off just now. Lots to go, yet, but SUCH an improvement!

My cheeks are still horrible though. Bah. And a little bunch of clogged-pores-soon-to-be-big-pimples have formed between my eyebrows. Worst place. Impossible to hide em and if you pop them, it looks just as bad.

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Day 27

GAH my lips are driving me NUTS!

Skin feels okay, though there are a few hurty bumps beneath the surface, but if there is a light directly above me... ouch... The texture looks disgusting, and the part that is making me crazy is that I can't tell if it's because of pimples that haven't come up yet, or if it's scarring (and therefore permanent).

Just generally frustrated, I guess. Bad night.

Though again, the Aveeno lotion with the redness reduction? Sooo good. I can tell a difference in colour, I think.

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Day 30!

One month down! :dance:

The big thing? My nose, almost blackhead free. My cheeks are... well, they are basically the same, with a few additions. Back is still crazy-gross (it was doing quite well before I went on Accutane, and hasn't recovered from it's initial breakout yet), neck is doing slightly better, and there is some forehead improvement. Overall, things look like they should be getting better. Just not as quickly and painlessly as I had hoped.

I'm trying not to think of the scars that will be left over. I am still clinging to the illusion that in 5 months, my skin will be flawless.

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Day 36

Lips are under control, mostly. But I think if I leave them without balm for more than a few hours, they'll shrivel up and fall off...

I'm getting oily again... ewwww. First day where my face was all shiny in a while now. Feels pretty icky now that I'm not used to it anymore.

Got another big thing on my neck right next to the one that is still healing, and one on my chin and forehead. Bleh.

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I`ve enjoyed reading your log. I start my treatment tomorrow, which I`m excited but extremely nervous about too. Being started on 40mg then to 80mg :shifty: But it`s all worth it in the end. :D Keep your head up you`re doing great!

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Day 37

Well damn. My cheeks are clearing up a little (yay), but they are revealing somewhat Edward James Olmos-esque scarring (don't get me wrong, I love the man). It doesn't seem as much of a big deal to me tonight, but last night I was in tears. There goes the 'flawless skin' hope.

But it's better than acne, and maybe it can be helped after I'm all done and pimple-less.

My veins in my legs seem way more visible than is normal. Side effect? Maybe I should drop by a clinic and have that looked at... it's not just 'oh I can see my veins' it's 'holy mother of god what is happening to my LEGS?!'

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Day 49

Mmmmyyessss been a little while....

It's Halloween! Yay! I dressed up as Zatanna (DC Comics fame) for a party. Wow, not for the faint of heart, I barely walked around at all. O_O But it was fun.

Skinwise, I'm drying out a lot more, it seems, especially around my mouth. But a bit of extra lotion takes care of it. A couple of new big ones on my neck (sigh... that makes 3 1/2 since the first one is almost gone, finally). But aside from clogged pores that haven't poked out yet, one cheek is almost clear :dance: The other, not so much... and the redness is sticking around with a vengence. BUT it's progress. Now if it would just be so kind as to work on my back as well...

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Day 50

New month, not much different.

I'm really worried about my veins, though. I don't remember seeing that as a side effect... they're really really visible, and my legs feel tired all the time, even when I'm just sitting... I think I might make an appointment to have that checked. I asked my derm, and he said it has nothing to do with accutane, though.

Boyfriend's birthday in 8 days... nooo idea what to get him! I'm not the romantic type, we both like comics. Maybe I'll get him something nerdy, and a flower or something. I'm terrible at this!

Pictures again soon. Probably tomorrow when I'm less tired and have my new glasses (yay!).

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Hey there, I'm on day 52 and I'm also on 40mg. My acne was starting to get pretty bad to where I did'nt want anyone to look at me, I even stopped excersising at the gym and never went out. Big zits that hurt, especially on the chin and cheeks. My chest, back and underarms were breaking out, although the birth control cleared up my back and chest. The only side effects that i have had are dry lips a little bit but I use Aquaphor, it's much better than chapstick. I'm getting very good results!!!

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Day 63

Been a while!

I was having some really great face-days for a while there (almost no pimples on my cheeks! Just the scarring which is easy to put makeup over, and clogged pores), but impending girl-ness (PMS) made me break out, and I'm back to square one. Sigh.

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Day ... 78?

More big pimples. Two on one cheek, one between my eyebrows (worst place ever, there's no way to cover it with hair), but the one from the above post is mostly gone now. After 15 days, though! AUGH! It takes so loooong...

I found out what's wrong with my legs though. Apparently I am genetically prone to varicose veins, and while I have no luck beating the odds for anything pleasant, I am developing them now (at 22 years old) instead of the more common age of some-time-in-your-forties. So yesterday sucked. I was really really upset. Even though it's ridiculous to be over something so trivial. I guess it's just that I was hoping I could be okay with how I look after accutane is done with, and now I have something new (AND incurable...) to try to hide. No more skirts or shorts for me.

I do have cupcakes though. Yay!

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