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I say do something - like making an appointment with a derm, a therapist, and then going to a concert with someone you love or some other equally pleasing life affirming action. Also, stop fighting yourself. Your unhappiness is a symptom of some internal battle that you cannot win unless you stop fighting yourself. Yes, you have acne, and this is not a good thing, but you are still free. You are free to love, and to live, and to want without warning. When this becomes clear, you will find yourself in a much better place than even if you were to miraculously wake up with clear skin. But I digress and you should look into accutane if nothing else has worked and you don't care about chapped lips, dry skin, red eyes, and limited alcohol intake for six months.

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I read it and awarded myself with a cigarette and a coffee, getting a Cookie is as likely as an encounter with the Messiah in my Office ;)

Very moving post, not to say i enjoy reading other peoples misery, but i much prefer when people here actually explain how they're feeling in some detail instead of leaving an ambiguous 2 line message, makes it a lot easier to construct a reply.

Ok, first of all, suicide = no (said that to quite a lot of people today) you know deep down that ending your life would cripple your family and those around you that care, aswell as depriving yourself of so many opportunities in life that are yet to happen. I've attempted suicide twice (obviously failed) and i've seen the aftermath of the actions, seeing my parents at my Hospital bed crying and in hysterics screaming at me, not being trusted to be in the house or go out alone for months, having psychological check ups at Hospital and having staff from the hospital coming to my house at random times and going over the same bullshit every time, it's not much fun. If you're seriously even considering it, i beg you to intervene and seek help, parents/friends/counsellors/helplines, just whatever it takes, we've had a member kill themselves on these boards before and we don't want anymore.

As far as direction goes, perhaps you should consider researching Accutane and consulting a Dr and express your concerns personally, it has been known in some cases to be the catalyst for Rosacea, and i've read a few people experience a lot of flushing during and after treatment, for me it did nothing but clear my skin (guess i was one of the lucky ones)

So lets see, Regimen, Biotics, Diet, Light Therapy have all failed.....there is a few moisturisers available that are specifically used to help treat red marks, Purpose do a good one :

http://www.purposeskincare.com/productGuideRR.shtml

If you're not using BP then this should work pretty well, i always found in conjunction with BP it would 'ball' up, it also has SPF 30 and is generally a good source of moisture for skin, highly recommnended by moi and i beleive it has a review on this site that you might want to check out.

Have you tried altering certain things you do in everyday life? Simple things like sleeping enough and not touching or picking your face can make, exercising is good aswell, lot of people say sweat causes them to break out, sweat is actually very good for the skin as it cleans the pores from the inside, as long as you clean your face relatively soon after a work out you should reap the benefits of it, exercise increases circulation and gets the blood flowing, thus increasing your bodies efficiency to remove toxins and all that other sciencey shit, just think of it as :

Exercise = Good

I wish i could write more but i gotta get back to work mate, try and think positive, acne doesn't last forever and one day you won't even think about your skin.

Good luck dude

Ry

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I am sorry you are going through that. I, also, read the entire post. I'd get myself a cookie but I already ate a bunch of cookies about an hour ago ;).

Anyway...suicide is NOT the answer. I second Calibos' post. Get some help. I mean I have a ton of red marks too. I actually only have one pimple on my face right now, a bad one at that, but just one. The red marks make it look like I have 30. But I'm still happy with who I am and with my life. I can understand depression caused by acne. I've been there. It's completely understandable. But I wasn't so depressed I wanted to end it all. Perhaps there is more there. And if that is true, then even if your face was completely clear you might still feel the same way. I encourage you to get help, do something fun, try to take good care of yourself. And in the meantime, I'd consider Accutane. If all else failed, then you still have that option left. And it is a GOOD one! At least discuss it with a doctor before ruling it out as not an option. :comfort:

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You need to check out Zincofax 40% cream. Trust me this works for getting rid of postacneic red marks. I can truly relate to what you are going thru as well. I have an appt with a plastic surgeon on Oct 10th to get a scar minimized on my chin. It started out as a skin ulcer...and then healed a tad leaving a scar...NO amount of moisturization can completely soften it so I am hoping he can remove the dead skin scar tissue. I would rather see a fine line scar on my chin vs this constant reminder of aggravating a bump on my chin before it turned into a full blown pimple. My greatest fear in life was having a scar on my face due to an acne breakout and if I dont finally get this resolved I will have to deal with it for the rest of my life and iM only 36.

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Gluten free cookie? Nah, I had two sausage egg and cheese muffins. :D

Everyone above gives excellent advise, there's not much more to add.

Even if you're a guy, have you considered using non-sparkly mineral makeup to conceal those red marks since they hamper your life so much? You do need continued counseling and I do hope you pursue that as well.

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Sorry, I know how you feel (except I have Asian skin that hyperpigments like a bitch, too). At the very least, I have 100 red marks on each side of my face, and that's not counting my chin and forehead. I have to wear contacts again now that school has started and everything is nice and sharp for me to see...makes me want to curl into a fetal position under the bed.

Anyways, like others have said, make an appointment with your derm. It can be scary wondering what kinds of bad things might happen, but you feel shitty anyways when you don't do anything. And like Wynne said, wear makeup. It's pretty much the only thing that has kept me from not dropping out of all my classes. Seeing a counsellor helps too, if for nothing more than to have someone to vent to and be real with.

Keep your head up.

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This is just ridiculous...I'm literally failing my classes because I can't attend them. In the bathroom before class, I happened to look up and catch sight of my face in the mirror (I usually avoid close-range, bright mirrors like the plague). ugh. every INCH of my face was covered in bright red marks. I have very fair skin and hair so it was just...gross. My active acne right now is moderate, in fact if you count only active lesions, close to the mild end of moderate, but the derm classified it as severe because literally, every millimeter of my cheeks/the side of my temples is covered with multiple red marks from old breakouts, and they are as bright as active acne, just flat to the touch. In one square inch on my cheeks, I can count like 20 separate marks from old breakouts. Added all together, we're into the hundreds. My skin just hyperpigments so easily. I can get a tiny scratch and it will be red for years, literally. I get great nutrition, so I think it's just genetic. Anyway I couldn't go to class. I can barely leave the house. I've been seriously considering suicide because even if I never got another pimple again, all the red marks on my face make it look like I have severe acne, and they're showing no sign of fading. Plus I still get 4 or 5 new pimples a week, adding to the mess.

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This is just ridiculous...I'm literally failing my classes because I can't attend them. In the bathroom before class, I happened to look up and catch sight of my face in the mirror (I usually avoid close-range, bright mirrors like the plague). ugh. every INCH of my face was covered in bright red marks. I have very fair skin and hair so it was just...gross. My active acne right now is moderate, in fact if you count only active lesions, close to the mild end of moderate, but the derm classified it as severe because literally, every millimeter of my cheeks/the side of my temples is covered with multiple red marks from old breakouts, and they are as bright as active acne, just flat to the touch. In one square inch on my cheeks, I can count like 20 separate marks from old breakouts. Added all together, we're into the hundreds. My skin just hyperpigments so easily. I can get a tiny scratch and it will be red for years, literally. I get great nutrition, so I think it's just genetic. Anyway I couldn't go to class. I can barely leave the house. I've been seriously considering suicide because even if I never got another pimple again, all the red marks on my face make it look like I have severe acne, and they're showing no sign of fading. Plus I still get 4 or 5 new pimples a week, adding to the mess.

So I'm really wondering what direction to go in next. With my history of depression and some psychosis in the past, I probably couldn't get a rx for accutane, plus I'm going to need an osteoplastic surgery on my leg next yr so I can't do it anyway, plus I've heard accutane makes scarring/red marks worse and since that's at least half of my problem, I don't think it's worth it. But antibiotics have failed, the regimen failed, retinoids failed, blue/red lights I ordered from the internet failed, diet and supplements helped with severity of breakouts, but only so much. benzamycin keeps the inflammation under control, but again, makes the red marks worse.

I'm thinking of making an appointment with the dermatologic surgery office in town. I've been avoiding it for a long time because of the expense and because I've heard horror stories about people's skin getting ruined by laser/microderm/chemical peel treatments. I just have skin that scars ridiculously easily so I'm afraid of making things worse...if that happened, it's a literal possibility I'd kill myself (not to get all emo, or whatever). But if I do nothing, that'll probably happen anyway. I know there's a ton of info on this board about different non-med treatments on the board, but it's kind of overwhelming. if anyone's still reading at this point and wants to point me in the right direction as to what non-med treatment options (e.g. laser, microderm) are most effective, best for people w/ active acne as well as red hyperpigmentation (I have minimal indented scarring, but it's mostly the discoloration) I'd really appreciate it. my parents are willing to pay for everything, so while I don't want to waste their money, I could do an expensive treatment if I thought it would help.

Anyway if you're still reading this, reward yourself with a gluten free cookie or something, lol.

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