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Okay, I'm a waitress and I work with a lot of disgruntled people. The other morning I'm sitting eating staff breakfast and buttering a piece of toast and this miserable waiter goes, "Yeah, that will clear your skin right up." I said, "Honey, if it were that easy I wouldn't have this." And gestured to my face. It made me want to cry but I didn't want to give him the satisfaction. I'm really broken out right now. I'm super sensitive about it. Most people have the decency not to say anything. I f-ing HATE the unsolicited comments. Yes, believe it or not, I know I have acne. I do not need a layperson with clear skin to remind me. Jesus Christ.

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Wow, what an ass! Sorry you had to deal with that guy. It's amazing to me the things people think are acceptable to say/do.

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I'm sure it hurts, but I think you handled it pretty well. Was he embarrassed at all after you said that? I notice that when you call people on something like they tend to retract a bit.

If it happens again, then you should directly ask him why he feels the need to make rude & unnecessary remarks about other people's appearance.

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I could tell he felt embarrassed because he tried to tell me something about how he's been using a special soap and it's been working for him-- he was trying to be sympathetic after he made a really rude comment. He says stuff like this to everyone at work, he even uses racial epithets and sexual comments that are disgustingly inappropriate. I find him sad, because he's clearly insanely insecure, but I don't think that means we have to put up with it. I want to talk to a manager about it but I'm the new person there so I don't want to make waves or they'll just find someone else...aargh. I know I could give it back just as good as he dishes it but I don't want to engage with him, especially because if I start in with this guy, he'll really go after my skin verbally, and all that stress would make me break out more. :mad:

thanks for your support, guys.

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LOL. I love your response to him :D

Maybe you can try being friends with the guy. Since you've started working there, and you think he's 'insanely insecure', perhaps you can be friends. This way, as friends, he won't pick on your about your skin. You're the bigger person when you don't return his harsh comment with your own.

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i personally couldn't be friends with someone so rude. people are dicks sometimes. i've been fortunate enough that no one has made comments about my skin outside of my family. i probably would break down and cry if some stranger or even a friend said something like that. but if i were u, i'd go to a supervisor if it continues. that can't be a happy work environment.

and if thats the way he is with everyone, chances are someone else has complained before so i doubt they would see YOU as the one making waves. u obviously did nothing to bring on that verbal abuse.

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I could tell he felt embarrassed because he tried to tell me something about how he's been using a special soap and it's been working for him-- he was trying to be sympathetic after he made a really rude comment. He says stuff like this to everyone at work, he even uses racial epithets and sexual comments that are disgustingly inappropriate. I find him sad, because he's clearly insanely insecure, but I don't think that means we have to put up with it. I want to talk to a manager about it but I'm the new person there so I don't want to make waves or they'll just find someone else...aargh. I know I could give it back just as good as he dishes it but I don't want to engage with him, especially because if I start in with this guy, he'll really go after my skin verbally, and all that stress would make me break out more. :mad:

thanks for your support, guys.

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Okay, I'm a waitress and I work with a lot of disgruntled people. The other morning I'm sitting eating staff breakfast and buttering a piece of toast and this miserable waiter goes, "Yeah, that will clear your skin right up." I said, "Honey, if it were that easy I wouldn't have this." And gestured to my face. It made me want to cry but I didn't want to give him the satisfaction. I'm really broken out right now. I'm super sensitive about it. Most people have the decency not to say anything. I f-ing HATE the unsolicited comments. Yes, believe it or not, I know I have acne. I do not need a layperson with clear skin to remind me. Jesus Christ.

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I think the best strategy is just to avoid people like him. I don't want to have to worry about what to say to him (I especially don't want to give him some nasty retort) so I'm just staying away. You'll like this one too-- the other day on the subway this little girl about 11 or 12 was with an older woman that looked like her grandmother standing right by me, and they were looking at my face and then gesturing to each other like, "look at her face" as if I didn't see them but I could see them plainly. Instead of being like, "i can see you, a whole family of idiots" I just walked to the other end of the train. I wish people knew how shitty it makes someone feel when they pay special attention to something so sensitive like bad skin. Does anyone else get this kind of crap on the street?

at least it gives us compassion for others.

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if i was there, he would be putting ice on his face right now.. fuckin ignorant SOB..

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That's so annoying. people are so judgemental and prejudiced. My English teacher in 9:th use to tell me what to eat and not eat..hate it when people put there nose where id doesn't belong.... Cause I'm so sensitive...

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Well, you can be as sensitive as you want here, I won't judge or stick my nose in your bidness (b/c it's broken out haha)

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Okay, so here's what happened today: he almost bumps into me. I chirp "oh, watch out!" and he snaps, "you don't say 'watch out' to me. got it? you say excuse me. excuse me!!" I yell across the floor with everyone listening: "you're excused, don't do it again...bitch."

Whew. I tried being nice, it worked until he got up in my pimply face. That biatch! Sometimes defending myself outright is the best answer, not just taking the easier softer way cause then I stew about it. I feel much better now. :dance:

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