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Arby

I hate being self conscious

I've always been this wacky, uncoordinated girl with wild curls who was upbeat and friendly and...I guess you could say I was hardly ever really self conscious because I knew that how I was on the inside was a lot more important...

But suddenly that's all changed. I mean, I'm still an extrovert, but only when my face looks good...which recently, has been never. And it's hard to make eye contact with people because I feel like they're just staring and it's awful.

I've gone into the bathroom during lunch several times just to cry my eyes out because I want the old me back. You see, I never had awful acne (pimples, but that's it, and they were noticeable but not too much). But this year I've developed this horrible cystic acne. It got so bad that I broke out once right in the middle of the winter formal and almost started crying because I saw my face in the reflection of the window and ran to the bathroom...

And I feel like when I put on makeup it's just pointless because it wears off throughout the day and I'm sitting here with my face being worse than it has EVER been in my life and I just...don't know what to do. There was a pool party I was invited to that I spent weeks preparing my abs and losing weight for so I would look good in a swimsuit, and that worked...but then I broke out and didn't go because I knew I couldn't wear makeup in the water.

I really really am feeling as if the situation is close to hopeless. And I really really want the old Rachel back.

And if you just read all of that, thanks. I just needed to vent.

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:comfort: I'm sorry, but you know, if people really do like you, they won't care if you have acne, they just want to be around you for your personality. Also, get your butt to a derm, they really do help :)

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:comfort: I'm sorry, but you know, if people really do like you, they won't care if you have acne, they just want to be around you for your personality. Also, get your butt to a derm, they really do help :)

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:comfort:

I've been there, and I'm sure many people on the boards here have been there too. I can't really offer any advice because I struggle with being self conscious every single day...but just know you're not alone.

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How old are you? I know the feeling the most wonderful prettiest people can have the worst acnes..

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I've never in my life been an extrovert and being self conscious does suck and I wish I wasn't this way. I feel your pain.

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Guest The Effendi

I think everyone here knows how you feel, maybe you

can take heart in that :)

And I hope things start working out for you again :)

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yep, I know exactly how you feel...I have been battling clear and gross skin for like six years now. When i am clear I feel like I can really be me and when I am in that zone so many good things come my way because i am unafraid to face them. litterally! When my skin is bad I don't even want to gel my hair up because of how awful my forhead looks. I also have mild scaring now from this last breakout which is just another thing i am gonna have to deal with now that my skin is clearing. It makes me feel like i am in a prison or something. IT just sucks! I get soooo pissed off that I have no confidence when i want to do something fun and therefore forgo would could portentially be great experiences. I think of how much different my life would be if i have just normal skin, a few pimples hear and there, that come and go quite fast. My insecurity do to acne has cost me many lovers and experiences. Just know you aren't alone.....I would suggest going on accutane right away. DON"T TAKE NO FROM YOUR DERM. when you have cystic acne, in my experience accutane is the only thing that really works! I hope the best for you!

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I go thru the same stuff. When my skin is clear, it is like my personality changes and I am more outgoing and friendly and happy and when I'm broken out, I'm miserable and don't feel like leaving my house. I feel like i always have to cover everything up. It is so frustrating. just wanted to tell you you're not alone

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..ive been there or i think im still there.. i think that being self conscious is normal to some extent because its human nature. but when this consciousness takes over your way of life then its bad. and it happens to everybody,not just people with acne.. even "goodlooking" people.. there is something that would always make them feel less attractive about themselves whether its a mole, there tummys, legs or whatever..

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I've been here before. I've always been fairly introverted, and overly concerned with my looks, and how others will perceive me. I wish I wasn't this way, and I constantly try to force myself not to be whenever I catch myself accidently thinking this way. The truth for me is it used to be acne that concerned me, the acne went away then it was something else, then something else the next day. There seems to always be something regardless. My goal is to be happy and stop finding things to nitpick or get concerned about. I'm getting better at it, but still not where I'd like to be.

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You guys are seriously great.

I mean, seriously.

I don't know, it's just nice to know there are others out there who feel this way...

But yeah. Thanks to you all. :]

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